home
***
CD-ROM
|
disk
|
FTP
|
other
***
search
/
The Unsorted BBS Collection
/
thegreatunsorted.tar
/
thegreatunsorted
/
texts
/
anarchy_text_a-l
/
dltrsfr
< prev
next >
Wrap
Text File
|
1992-06-28
|
8KB
|
159 lines
─── ▀▄ ▄▄ ▄▄ ▄▀ ▄▄▄█ ▄▀▄ ▄▀▀▄ ───
────── █ █ █ █ ▄▀ █ █ █ ──────
───────── █▄ █ █ █ █ ▄█▀ █▄ █ ─────────
───────── ▄▀█ █ █ █▄▀▀ █ █ █ ─────────
────── █ █ ▀█ █ █ █ ──────
─── ▄▀ ▀▄ ▀▄▀ ▀▄▀ ▀▄▀ ▀▄▄▀ ───
▌▌▌ Proudly Presents ▌▌▌
┌────────────────────────────────────┐
│ Fun At The Happiest Place on Earth │
└────────────────────────────────────┘
By: Morrison
June 28, Nineteen-Hundred and Ninety-Two
Hello kiddies! I am sure that you all have been to Disneyland at one
time or another, and I am sure that you all have learned that the
Happiest Place on Earth is also one of the biggest rip-off's on earth.
Well, fret no more, because you are about to learn several ways to
scam the Magic Kingdom and get the most for no money!
Part 1: Getting in to Disneyland
Before you can start wreaking havoc on the place, you are going to have
to learn how to get in. By far the most reliable and easy method is the
stamp transfer. All that you need is a large piece of plastic tape (the
kind that is used for packing works wonders) and somebody with a hand stamp.
The best way to get the hand stamp is to either ask somebody that you see
coming out of the park, or pitching in and buying one ticket so somebody can
get inside and get the stamp. If you happen to know somebody with an anual
pass, that is even better. Once you find the person with the hand stamp,
leave the property to do the transfering! You used to be able to transfer
anywhere, but security has been getting uptight, so it is best to leave.
The Disneyland Hotel (across the street) is a good place to go. Once you
are in the clear, you have to remove the stamp with the tape. Cut a fair
sized piece (about 8 inches) and cover the original hand stamp with the
tape. Make sure that you have the tape over the stamp! If you cannot see
the stamp (you probably will not be able to) you can make sure by using a
blacklight. I carry one of those little spy-tech lights with me because
they fit in your pocket, and work wonders. Once you have tape in the right
place, you need to rub vigourously to get a copy of the stamp. Just use
your sleeve and rub over the stamp until it gets really hot, the peel the
tape off. You should be able to see the copy of the stamp on the tape!
And don't worry, the person that had the original stamp will still have it
on his hand, this will not take it off. Well, now you have the stamp and
can transfer it to your friends. Have your friend lick his hand (this helps
remove the ink from the tape) but make sure it is not sopping wet, or the
stamp will smear, just dampen the hand. Then, wrap the tape on the LEFT
hand of the person getting the transfer, and rub until you can feel the heat.
This should create a PERFECT copy of the original stamp! Once you have
given everyone a transfer (one piece of tape will work for about 4-5 people)
you are ready to re-enter the park. There are two places that you can get
inside. One of them is the main gate, and the other is the monorail station
at the Disneyland Hotel. NOTE: The stamp that you recieve when you leave
the park from the monorail, and the stamp from the main gate are different!
The monorail stamp has a circle around it, so if you are asked where you left
the park, be sure that you say "Main Gate" if you don't have a monorail
stamp, and vice versa. Now, you will have one little problem when you try
to get back in the park, but this is easily avoidable. You must have a
valid Disneyland passport (ticket) AND a stamp to get in. Since you don't
have a passport, you could be in trouble, right? WRONG! There are many
ways to get around this. The first one is to keep your mouth shut. If the
people at re-entry don't ask to see your ticket, then walk in and stay quiet.
If they do ask to see it, you have several options:
1. Before going in to the park, look around for a ticket stub. Ask people
that are leaving if you can have theirs. This is probably the best way.
2. Say that you got signed in. I am sure that you know somebody that works
there, and if you do, you should have no problem, all they will do is
ask for a name. If you don't know anyone, make up a name...they probably
will not know the person anyway.
3. Spend 50 cents on a locker key (the lockers outside the park) and when
they ask you for a ticket, tell them that you left it in the locker
inside the park. They will ask to see your key, show it to them, and
then walk in!
4. Have your friend (the one that got the original stamp) lie to the gate
workers before he leaves the park. He should tell somebody that he
lost his ticket, and would like to return. The person working at the
gate will tell you to just mention that you spoke with them (remember
their name) when you re-enter the park.
Well, now you are inside Disneyland. If you fucked up, it aint my fault,
since I have been transfering in for more than two years without any
problems. Just use your head, the system is not hard to figure out.
Ok, here are some things to do inside the Magic Kingdom. These are alot
of fun, but they don't work all of the time, so don't yell at me if
something goes wrong.
The 5 dollar scam:
Take a five dollar bill and insert it into a change maching at one of the
arcades. Take the change that comes out, and have somebody wait by the
machine. Go and tell the attendant that the change machine stole five
of your dollars. She will call a person to take a look at the machine,
the person will open it up and see your five on top, and refund it to you.
Getting free change:
Just mention to the arcade attendant that you lost some money in a game.
Instand refund! Don't be stupid and say that you lost a quarter, cause you
will only get a quarter back. Tell him that you lost the money in a 75 cent
game, or something like that. Do this every time the attendants change
shifts, and you should have a fat pocket by the end of the day.
Getting free food:
If you want some free food, go to one of the local resturants, order
something, and eat most of it. Then, drop what is left, go back and tell
them that you dropped your food, and they should give you a replacement!
Save your reciept, and you can do this several times!
Shoplifting:
Shoplifting at the park is simple, since there are so many people, and so
few security. Undercover security always has either a hip pack or a
back pack to keep their walkie-talkies in. Avoid these people when you can!
The best thing to do is look like you are shopping, pick somethin up, and
walk into the next store with it. Since the stores are all connected, this
is no problem. Just keep walking through the stores, and eventually, walk
out with your product! Also, if you find a reciept for something, SAVE IT
because you can use it to get free items!
Anarchy:
While in the park, do everything that you can. Go on Snow White, Pinoccio,
Alice in Wonderland, and all of those kiddie rides and steal goodies from
inside. There are no cameras, so you are safe to do what you want. Just
step on the pedal that you will find on the left side of the cars, at the
bottom, and the safety bar will rise up and you can get out. Take the
apple from the evil witches hand, the bow tie off one of the donkeys, and
the heart that the Kind of Hears holds. You have yourself a nice souveneir!
Drugs:
Drugs can be really alot of fun. Acid is wonderful for Disneyland, it is
one of the best trips! You can smoke out on the Peoplemover without any
problems, just be sure that you do it when the cars are out of doors and
there are no cameras around. Hey, wait a minute, drugs? Just say no!
Ahahahahahahahahaha.
Well, this concludes our file on Anarchy at Disneyland. Enjoy yourself,
have fun, and take advantage of the park! It is their for your enjoyment.
Oh, one last thing. I am in no way responsible for whatever the hell
you do. Yea, right......