The Unsorted BBS Collection/thegreatunsorted.tar/thegreatunsorted/misc/mischief.txt

Text File | 1996-03-17 | 15KB | 301 lines

  (^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^)
  (                                                        )
  (           "Creative Mischief And Revenge"              )
  (               written by Shadow Virus                  )
  (          Version 1.0, last updated March 1996          )
  (                                                        )
  (________________________________________________________)


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  DISCLAIMER AND ASSORTED STUFF:
  Everything in this file is intended to be used for
  practical purposes - in other words, go out and do
  it! I tried to keep the mischief easy to do, cheap,
  and fun, and there is nothing in the revenge section
  that could really hurt someone, but boy, can you sure
  annoy/confuse people with so little effort! :)

  All my files can be found stashed on:
  Digital Decay BBS [phone]

  This is File #2 written by me, File #1 was "new and
  inventive places to go trashing", TRASH.ZIP

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  MISCHIEF! What in hell is mischief?!?! Well, mischief is
  stuff you can do to really annoy people. Mischief is
  also good for just generally goofing around and impressing
  your friends. :) I've divided both the mischief and
  revenge sections into a format where you read the
  ingredient and then all the stuff you can do with it.

  A. Glue (Super Glue, Krazy Glue, anything but Elmers)
        1) Get about ten dimes, or preferably quarters.
  Place these anywhere people will see them - on the
  sidewalk, on benches, on fire alarms, on lockers, etc.
  Make sure they're in plain sight - you want people to
  see them. Glue them down firmly, then enjoy watching
  people try to pick up the coins with no success and
  a lot of frustration. :) Just a note about the fire
  alarm: I have heard - although not done it myself -
  that the coin can be glued in such a way that when
  someone yanks on it to get it off, the fire alarm
  goes off.
        2) Glue down everything you see. Glue pencils to
  desks, glue leaves to street signs, glue toilet paper
  to tree trunks. Observe benches in the park; see where
  people commonly sit down and arrange to sneakily drop
  some glue on the spot. Even though it rarely glues them
  to the seat like you see on movies, it does leave a
  very annoying wet-looking patch on the backside of their
  clothes. :)
        3) Get creative with your glue! Remember, the
  point is to either annoy or confuse people. Glue
  empty, addressed, stamped envelopes to the inside
  door of U.S. postal drop-off mailboxes - you know
  how you open the door, place your mail on the inside,
  and close it to drop the mail in? Glue the envelope
  firmly there; the person opens the door to drop their
  mail in, sees your letter, closes the door, reopens
  it, looks confused, tries to pry up the letter, and
  gets even more confused. :)
        4) If you really like confusing people and
  hiding to see their reactions, remember that the
  best way to confuse someone is to change something
  normal. For example, glue tree leaves to noticable
  flowers like roses; glue fake birds (you can buy
  these at craft stores) to people's windows; glue
  computer disks to the tables in computer labs or
  beside the library's computers, as if someone left
  it there by accident.
        5) And about gluing things to tables: try smaller
  things like paper clips or erasers; also be sure to glue
  down a few papers.

  B. Alphabetic letters. (The 3" kind you can buy at
  places like Staples, they're stickers and look pretty
  professional).
        1) Modify street signs. Paint over the words with
  white paint, then put your letters into the word you'd
  rather have. "NO BIKE RIDING, SKATEBOARDING, OR GOLFING
  AT ANY TIME" is one we have at my school; whenever I
  get the chance, it becomes "NO BIKE RIDING, MASTURBATING,
  OR GOLFING AT ANY TIME".
        2) Like I said, be creative. Put letters on public
  benches saying WET PAINT or NO SITTING ALLOWED; change
  10 MINUTE PARKING to 100 MINUTE PARKING with the
  numerals that come with the package of letters.

  C. Dish soap. (Like Joy or Ivory; you know, dishwashing
  soap).
        1) Shove some modeling clay or bubble gum down a
  drain; public sinks (like in public bathrooms) are best
  but drinking fountains work well also. Dribble a fair
  amount of dishwashing soap onto the makeshift seal (put
  the clay/gum far enough into the drain so it isn't
  instantly noticeable). The next time someone uses it,
  massive amounts of bubbles will come flooding from the
  drain, thoroughly confusing the person. :)
        2) Buy the "lemon scent" kinds - the scent is
  always pretty damn strong. Drip it on benches, desk
  seats, in the corners of rooms, etc. People try to
  locate the source of the scent and never quite can. And
  if they sit down on it, the scent gets on them, and if
  they try to wash it off with water, it makes it stronger.
  Of course, no lasting damage, as it will come out when
  they wash their clothes in the washing machine. :)
        C) And yes, for you malicious people, putting
  dishwashing soap on sidewalks makes them incredibly
  slippery.

  D. Spiders. (No, not real spiders; I mean the plastic
  spiders you can buy at toy stores, 100 for like $3).
        1) Glue a spider anywhere they will be noticed.
  Glue them in the corners of rooms, tie a thread around
  them and tape them to the ceiling so they dangle, or
  glue them - this is terrifying - to a light switch, so
  when someone feels their hand across the wall to turn
  on the light in the dark, they feel it and usually
  scream. People have this instinctive fear of spiders
  and you can always use this to your advantage.
        2) For scaring a specific someone, buy one of
  the hairy tarantulas they sell at toy stores. They
  usually have fur on the butt, and feel/look pretty
  realistic when catching someone by surprise. Glue/
  tack them in corners of rooms, or wait until the person
  has gone to sleep, sneak into their room, and suspend it
  so when the person wakes up, the first thing they see is
  a tarantula hanging five inches from their face. This
  usually works well on family members, but don't expect
  them to speak to you for awhile. :)

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  REVENGE! If you need me to tell you what revenge is, you
  shouldn't even be reading this file. ;) The format here
  is slightly different - instead of listing ingredients,
  it lists a specific way to target someone, such as Cars,
  Lockers, Houses, etc.

  A. Lawns
        1) Bleach works well on lawns. Bleach instantly
  kills grass, turning it white. This works very well for
  spelling out words on someone's lawn in large white
  letters. Also, short of digging up the grass or replacing
  it with fresh sod, there is nothing they can do except
  wait a few weeks for the bleach to wear away and new
  grass to grow, obscuring the message. Of course, then you
  can go do it again. :)
        2) Think back to election time when you saw all
  those signs in people's lawns; stuff like "AL KINNINGTON
  FOR SCHOOL BOARD" or "CLINTON FOR PRESIDENT" - you know
  the type. Take this idea and make a few signs - maybe
  "<insert full name> FOR QUEEN OF THE YEAR" for a guy and
  possibly "<insert full name> FOR MISS DYKE 1996" and
  stick them in their lawns. Of course, when they notice,
  they'll remove it, but in the meantime, people driving
  by will have noticed and be laughing their asses off. :)

  B. Lockers (For us lucky high sk00l kids ;>).
        1) Go to the nearest AmPm or McDonalds; usually
  they will have, outside, newspaper dispensers, and
  some of these will usually be the cheesy $1.00 b&w
  advertisement porno magazines. Buy a magazine or two,
  go home, and carefully cut out pictures. For revenge
  on a guy, take pictures of nude males and paste them
  inside his locker (use a mirror or glance over his
  shoulder to get the combination) or on the outside of
  his locker with a sweet topic like, "<Insert full name
  here>'s Lovers". For a female, use female pictures.
        2) Buy a cooking funnel (about $1.50) or make a
  cheap one yourself buy rolling paper into a cone. Buy
  flour, or just snitch some from your kitchen at home.
  Place the funnel into the top vent in your victim's
  locker, then pour the flour in. When they open their
  locker, everything inside will be covered by a white
  substance. Cocaine? Rat poison? I have never seen my
  victim ever touch the white stuff, which always cracks
  me up, seeing as it is only common flour... but they
  don't know that! :) You can do this to your friends as
  a practical joke, because the flour can be shaken off
  without leaving any permanent traces.
        3) Variation on 2: dribble in a fair amount of
  water. This soaks the flour and soaked flour sticks to
  *everything*. They'll have a hell of a time getting it
  off their books - and any papers will be ruined by the
  water.
        4) Do #2 but substitute corn syrup for flour. Corn
  syrup is terrible in that it is virtually indestructible.
  No known chemical will dissolve it. And it STICKS to
  everything. Books and any clothes in the locker will be
  saturated; clothes can't be thrown into the washing
  machine because the corn syrup would ruin it. Incredibly
  destructive.
        5) Fill their locker with dirt. When they open it,
  the dirt comes cascading out. A better substitute is
  sand, so the next time you go to the beach, bring along
  a few Baggies and get some. Sand is incredibly versatile.
        6) Put chewed bubble-gum or any equally disgusting
  substance all over the combination dial.
        7) And for those of you who are really into
  revenge: in any basic row of school lockers, they are all
  in a bank, like #######    <-- bank of lockers, each # is
                  #######        a locker

  Now, if you open up your locker and take a look, you'll
  see probably six screws. Two on the left wall of the
  locker, two on the right wall, and two on the back of the
  locker. If these screws are removed, the locker can be
  lifted right out of the bank of lockers. :) I'm sure you
  see the advantages in this...
                1) Get your victim's combo by using a
  mirror or glancing over his shoulder. Remove his locker,
  take all the stuff out, and put the stuff into the empty
  hole where his locker was.
                2) Same as 1, except take all the stuff and
  leave a goofy ransom note: "If you want to see your
  locker and everything in it again, send two nude females
  and a sacrificed cat to <insert address here, get a random
  one from the phone book>." But be sure to cut the letters
  from a newspaper/magazine for a true ransom note look,
  and use some sense, use gloves while making it and go at
  night. If you're walking across campus during the daytime
  with a locker in your arms, someone will ask you why. ;P
                3) Get the combos for two lockers and
  switch the two. There will be two very confused people
  wondering why their locker combinations aren't working...
  and you can do this trick on a wide scale, too.

  C. Cars
        1) If you are a destructive person, go buy some
  oven-cleaning liquid. Sneak to your victim's car about
  11:00 pm or 12:00 am. Spell out words or draw pictures
  in the oven-cleaning liquid. It won't look like anything
  is happening, but leave. The next day, take a look at
  their car; wherever you put the oven cleaner, the paint
  will be gone and the bright grey metal will be showing
  through. The oven cleaner will have dissolved the paint
  overnight, and when they drive the car, the dissolved
  paint flakes off.
        2) Acquire some of the afore-mentioned cheap pornos
  and make sweet signs with pictures on them, maybe stuff
  like "<victim's name>'s MOM - HE TOLD US SHE WAS PRETTY
  GOOD" with a nude picture of a lady and crap. Be sure to
  put a penis extender advertisement with a caption like
  "ARE YOU LOOKING INTO THIS YET, <victim name>?" Now sneak
  out and put these all over his car.
        3) Glue down the window wipers.
        4) Glue toy animals all over his car. Unless he
  wants to look like a freak with toys all over his car,
  he'll have to waste a long time prying each one off, and
  it's hell on the paint job.
        5) Glue pictures of nude males to his car, or pics
  of nude females to her car. Be sure to get Namu in there
  somewhere. :)
        6) Puffy-paint his windows with rude symbols or
  words. Get creative here - glass etcher, although a bit
  more expensive (can be bought at hardware stores) works
  wonderfully.

  D. Houses
        1) Buy a big block of styrofoam at Michael's or a
  similar craft store. (Don't worry, styrofoam is pretty
  cheap.) Cut it into obscene shapes and spraypaint it,
  then put these on people's roofs so they are visible
  from the street.
        2) Print banners and put them on people's houses.
  "I LOVE HAIRY MEN NAMED BOBO" and stuff like that. Or
  "BOYS II MEN FAN CLUB PRESIDENT" if they are rabid KROQ/
  metalheads. Get creative!

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  Well, I'm finished writing this crappy file, hope you
  enjoyed it. All ideas were my own and if I ever put an
  unoriginal idea in here I will give credit to the file/
  person who wrote it first. Most of these have been tried,
  and work pretty well. :) A little creativity goes a long
  way!
  To get in touch with me, email me: [e-mail]
  or catch me on IRC as ImA2Tone or ShadowV. I'm usually
  in #ska but I can be found elsewhere so just /msg me. I
  update these pretty frequently as I come up with new
  ideas so take a look every now and then to make sure you
  have the newest version. March 1996!
  Thanks to: SkaSoCa, Mephiskapheles (a damned awesome ska
  band), and everyone else who's cool...

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