There is this fat guy who weighs about 600 pounds, and no diet seems to work.
So he goes to his friend who owns a whore house, and tells him that he'll do
anything to lose weight. His friend tells him for 50 dollars, he can lose 100
lbs. The fat guy goes for it. His friend leads him into a room with a gorgeous
brunette, and she says "If you catch me you can fuck me". So he runs and runs for hours, and loses just over 100 lbs. He is so excited he goes back a couple days later (as soon as he could)
The second time he goes into a room with a chesty blonde, with an ass to die
for. This time he loses about 150 lbs. The fat guy is all excited since he
only ways about 350 pounds, and goes back again. This time he tells his friend that he'll do anything to lose 200 pounds and be skinny. So his friend charges him a thousand dollars, and leads him to a new room. This time Mike Tyson is
in the room and he says "If I catch you, I'M GONNA FUCK YOU!"
One fall there were a bunch of Americans on a bus tour of the great Canadian
North. All of the sudden, they rounded a bend, and an indian stood in the
middle of the road. The bus driver slammed on the brakes, grabbed his rifle
from under the seat, and was out the door in a flash. After 2 gunshots, the
indian lay dead on the pavement. The Americans thought this was absolutely
awful, and asked the bus driver why on earth he would should an indian. They
were very surprised when he told them that it was indian season. In the
Canadian north, they were treated just like wild animals, and were a trophy
for hunters. Well, upon hearing that, the Americans changed their tune, and
decided that they would like to go indian hunting. That evening, they made
hunting plans for the next day, including renting a jeep and some firearms.
Well, the next morning they headed off indian hunting, making a quick stop
at the liquor store on the way out of twon. When they got to a deserted es
wooded area, they parked the jeep at the side of the road, and started
wandering through the bush in search of an indian. Well, they wandered all
around all day, and didn't see a single indian. Feeling dejected, they
walked back toward their jeep. As they approached, they could not believe
their eyes. Sitting in their jeep were half a dozen indians, drinking all
their booze. Well, after a few well placed shots by two of the americans,
all 6 of the indians lay dead. All of a sudden, a Fish and game officer
drove up, his lights flashing. He jumped out of his truck, and arrested the
two Americans who had just shot the indians. They could not believe what
was happening, as they didn't think they had done anything wrong. They asked
the officer if it was open season for indians, and if so, what had they done wrong? He replied of course its open season, but you're not allowed to bait