Collection of Hack-Phreak Scene Programs/cleanhpvac.zip/cleanhpvac/CHEATVCE.ZIP/CHEATVCE.TXT

Text File | 1995-07-18 | 9KB | 171 lines

Victorian Certificate of Education... a cheaters guide...

Written By:  Moons

Umm... this is for READING pleasure ONLY.  You know what I'm getting at...
IF YOU DO ANY OF THIS STUFF AND GET CAUGHT IT ISN'T MY FAULT, the information
contained in this file is all FICTIONAL... :) VCAB, BOS, CENSORSHIP bodies,
ASIO, the media and AUTHORITIES in general can all politely GET FUCKED...
to quote Eddie and the boys...

        "This is NOT for you !!"  - Pearl Jam...

If you are a student like I am, we will both know that 98% of students cheat.
Be it in tests, homework or in class.  Even that nerd who consistently sits in
the front row during Physics class cheats.  Now if you are a teacher, parent
or a similar adult you will never believe that your students/kids cheat.

Then I bid you farewell, for since this is all UNTRUE why would you want to
know how it ISN'T done !!!

ok. Let's start with those fucking tests !! A trick a TEACHER actually taught
me was to send someone else to do the test for you.  Before you tell me this
is impossible take note that the larger VCE test CATs are supervised by
someone other than your teacher(s).  All you need to do is INFLUENCE an expert
in your field to take the test, have them memorise your name and Student
Number and wait for those A+'s. :) Please note that a Uni Student can pose as
a Year 12 Student, an aging CSiRO professor cannot !!

While on the topic of tests... remember to take that Dictionary into the
English CATs.  'WHY ?' I hear you ask.  Well if you really can't memorise
that book which absolutely sucked, (which, lets be honest, you didn't read
anyway !!) for your essay, write the information into your dictionary.

NOTE: use a light pencil, 2h or something because they may check it quickly,
(flick through the pages). In case of this it is best not to write in the big
blank spaces on pages, eg:  Under paragraphs, at the end of chapters, etc.
Make sure your notes are as unobtrusive as possible.  My advise is to write
very lightly in between the lines of   () printed text, eg: the space between
this line of text and the one above it.

The only down side to this is that you have to either ATTAIN a copy of
someones notes to transcribe, or actually read the book. (SHOCK !!!
HORROR !!!)  The choice is yours...

Now it is an undcumented fact that Girls do better in VCE be it because they
are trusted more than us Guys or simply becuase they pay more attention in
class.  It is now where I introduce my personal most hated subject... MATHS.

Maths... the work sucked, the class sucked & the teacher sucked !! In fact
after double Maths on Monday Morning the whole day sucked.  I REALLY hated
it. 'x+y+12/23*4=r*2'.  Nobody needs that on a Monday Morning.  The technique
I used here was to scan the room for the most available/attractive/smart girl
in the room.  Now the order which you place those attributes depend on you,
depending on your particular situation.  I was lucky finding them to be all
(to a degree) in one girl in my class, who shall remain nameless, (for both
my sake, and hers !) anyway I managed to copy ALL her work over the period of
a year after a few choice words ;).  (If you want to get really evil you can
even get THEM to do the work for you, with a little skill in the art of
Persuassion !!)

A very annoying side effect is the 'Wanna see a movie ?', What's your
number ?', etc.  A real NIGHTMARE.  Now I was lucky as the girl was ok, but
if you are out of luck then you can (a) Give a falsey, (b) Use your favourite
drop line, (c) The direct and cruel 'I used you, I hate you... Thanx :)', or
(d) Let it be known you are involved, or want to be involved with somebody
ELSE !!!  Whatever your descision remember two things.

1.      You will unavoidably see this person again (at school),
        and more importantly...

2.      Girls talk.  You could be sexually BLACKLISTED within a
        few short gossip sessions, and NOBODY wants that !!

The other major problem with MATHS was the working out.  I mean we got a
hold of an ALGEBRA-PROOF calculator, but, a new problem arose... 'Where's
the working out !?'... What you do is INVENT it :) Use the numbers given in
the problem and arrange them as if they were working out, now in this state
the teacher can tell they are fake soooo you scribble over and around them,
accidently spill liquid paper over some of it, coffee for homework, etc.
Sure you may loose points for no working out and poor presentation but you
WILL pass !!! (Trust me I have done this many times !!)

Persuasion.  This next section involves some general techniques for Persuading
people to GIVE you their work.  For the opposite sex it is fairly easy, Flirt
like crazy; just think of Sherlyn Fenn 8)  I know in some cases comparing a
woman like Sheryln Fenn and your Intelligent Classmate may be repulsive,
morally wrong and nauseating, but it's the difference between a PASS or FAIL.
REMEMBER THAT !!

But coaxing the class nerd is a little harder.  Now there are various things
you can do varying in difficulty, humour, and practicallity, but don't get me
wrong, there's NO easy way.  Here is a short list of pro's and cons to a few
common methods...

        1. Physically threaten the person...

                Pro's: Wealding a knife is fun... Try it
                Con's: You could get done for assault :(

        2. Be their freind for the duration...

                Pros': Easy, Effective, Failsafe
                Con's: Reputation, After School hassles, Etc.

        3. Bribe...

                Pro's: $$$ makes the world go around, hard to prove
                Con's: The actual cost

        4. Extortion... (My fave)

                Pro's: Fun, Learn things about the class nerd
                Con's: Time to set him up, find/invent something

        5. Plead/Beg...

                Pro's: Easy to perform, easy to deny :)
                Con's: Need to cry to be effective, humiliating, etc.

Generally we found a friend of the nerd who wanted to be 'COOL' who would pass
on his work secretly.  Remember the only thing Nerds want more than an A+ is
to NOT be nerds.  Use this to your advantage.  'Yeah but you'll be a Mad Cunt
like us if you give us your work... Wow !! It's like breaking the LAW !! -
What a rush !!' I REALLY hope all you people reading this realize that the
above quote is sample PERSUASION dialogue. We all know the rush from illegal
activity is compared only to the finest woman or most potent tab of LSD !! O)

There are of course many obvious ways to cheat and attain work which is not
your own.  The most obvious one being to HACK the school computer.  I will not
go into the details of hacking as that has been covered many times elsewhere,
but I will tell you to unobtrusively watch the computer staff when they are
logging on.  After studying the hand movements you can guess, if not know what
the SLY BASTARDS are using as a password.  At our school they didn't change
the password for two years. (Until we CRASHED the system a few times :)

The other obvious way to cheat is to physically steal work.  Lockers, bags,
library.  For the professional cheater the only place to steal from is the
Teachers office.  Just think all the work you need, conveniently sorted
alphabetically, maybe even corrected.  Standard stealing conventions apply.
After taking some work from an office don't go anywhere near it again for at
least a month.  Let it cool off, try the library or one of the above mentioned
methods.  Just remember to be carefull.  Failing is better than being
expelled (Most of the time !!).

The best way to beat VCE is TEAMWORK.  Set up a syndicate of freinds (make
sure they are trustworthy) and SHARE the workload.  Most of my freinds really
didn't do the quality work that was needed (Hell !! neither did I !!) but they
were quite apt at LIBERATING good quality work.  I remember many a time where
I had two or three copies of the same assignment (By different people) in
front of me while I did (or should I say 'selectively copied' :) my own work.

Overall though the best way to do well in VCE is to be friendly to your
teachers (WHAT !!!! :O ) Well teachers are not our enemy, nerds are. Teachers
are the people who mark your work and believe me if they don't like you
they're not going to like your work. (BELIEVE THAT !!)  They also have the
ability to give you extensions, which are a cheaters most valuable tool, next
to the photocopier... anyways even after this coaching you might still feel
VCE daunting, please, do not dispair... After all, I PASSED !! :)








                              Remeber:  The Easy way out is just that !!

                              Moons