Current Shareware 1994 January/SHAR194.ISO/email/6930tags.zip/LONG.TAG

Text File | 1993-01-04 | 6KB | 94 lines

"I say we nuke the site from Orbit, it's the only way to be sure."
"I see!" said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw.
"Virtual" means never knowing where your next byte is coming from.
(A)bort (F)ail (C)reate a holographic image in plasma memory?
A pound of puppies; a college of cardinals; a bowl of weevils
All you folks do not exist. My sysop types all this stuff in.
And God said, "Let there be Windoze...and he rested on that day."
Answers: $1, Short: $5, Correct: $25, dumb looks are still free.
Cookie pieces contain NO calories, breakage leaks calories.
DO NOT BEND, FOLD, STAPLE, OR IN ANY WAY MUTILATE THIS TAGLINE
Don't believe in astrology. We Scorpios aren't taken in by such things.
Even if you're not, be brave, no one can tell the difference.
Eventually land east of San Andres fault will fall into the Atlantic.
FANATIC: one enthusastic about something you don't care about.
FLATTERY: telling a person exactly what he thinks of himself.
Famous Quotes: "...and tits doesn't belong on the list!" - G. Carlin
File not found. I'll load something *I* think is interesting.
Get 'em by the balls and their hearts and minds will follow.
Give me break, Ofc. I'm a distant cousin of your 3rd grade teacher.
Govt investigations contribute more to amusement than knowledge.
Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response.
Happiness: a perfume you can't give away without getting some yourself.
Hey, don't ask me, I'm just an Anthropomorphic Personification.
Hmmmmmm... I'm hearing those happy gurgly noises again! :-)
I don't want to grow up, I won't grow up, you can't make me.
I have 240 airconditioning in my car; 2 windows down at 40mph.
I worked in a petshop and people kept asking how big I'll get.
If Jack helped you off of a horse, would you help Jack off a horse?
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
If sex is a pain in the ass then you need more lubrication.
If tennis elbow is painful, imagine suffering with tennis balls.
If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle em with bullsh*t.
If you know how to organize things, you will know how to enjoy them.
If you know, you're a genius. If you answer, you're awesome.
Inside small problems a large problem struggles to get out.
It all comes down to treating others as you want to be treated.
It's not so much how we stand as the direction we're moving.
Journeys begin with a single step, and a decision to take it.
Life shouldn't be an endless repetition of stale successes.
Make a decision based solely on money, you've made a bad decision.
Make offer or buy all for $100.00 Shipping or COD not included.
Motel mattresses are better on the side away from the phone.
My economy: Hairline recession; waist inflation; deep depression.
My hard disk is full! Maybe I'll try this message section thing.
Neither Borrower Or Lender Be; routinely ignored by Congress.
NetWare does not have bugs, it has "Undocumented enhancements"
Never attribute to malice that which may be explained by stupidty.
Never put off to tomorrow what you can wiggle out of today.
No artist sees reality, if he did he wouldn't be an artist.
Not genius, glory or love reflects the soul's greatness, it's kindness.
Our Standard: Exellence; Our Goal: Perfection; Reality: Murphy.
PARENT: Don't you understand English? HONEST CHILD: No, not fully!
Play electronic games? You have too much time on your hands.
President/VicePresident is undefined. Cannot divide by zero.
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you support it for life.
Screenwriters apply character personalities like Post-It notes.
Since you're going to die anyway, can we use you as a shield?
Smell like fish? It's a dish. Smell cologne, leave it alone.
Star Wars: vehicle to Carrie Fisher, Hamil and Ford to fame.
Starkle Starkle Little Twink What the hell you are I think?
Television is so dull that children are doing their homework.
The characters are confused, the motivations obscure...USGOVT.
The history of every country begins in the heart of a man or woman.
The mark of a true professional is giving more than you get.
The only thing God didn't do to Job was give him a computer.
The wise don't merely stalk their prey, they make the kill.
There's no elevator to success. You have to take the stairs.
This party is getting dirty, better pull my pants up and go home.
Three worst words when you're making love? 'Honey, I'm home.'
Two Betazoids walk into a bar. One says, "I'll have the same."
Two most common elements in the universe: Hydrogen & Stupidity.
Violence never solves anything, but it sure makes me feel good.
Visa, Visa, Viso -> I shopped, I shopped, I ran out of cash.
Want to know the heart and mind of America? Learn baseball.
Wanted a pair of watch dogs, named the pups Timex and Bulova.
We all have failures. The question is, what do we do with them?
We spend billions on games of chance, not including weddings.
We'll have fun, fun, fun til her daddy takes her condoms away!
We've secretly replaced the Dilithium with new Folger's crystals.
What do lawyers use for birth control? Their personalities.
What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the pool? Bob
What's a woman with PMS and ESP? A BITCH who knows everything.
When I get a better mouse trap built, mice will be an endangered species.
When everything is relative, even relativity loses meaning.
When you're 70 tomorrow's yesterday before you know it was today.
Where do you find 100 talking invertebrates? The US Senate!
Why do women have legs? Prevents snail tracks on the linoleum.
WindowError:009 Horrible bug encountered. God knows what happened.
WindowError:00F Unexplained error. Please tell us how it happened.
Wishful thinking on your part doesn't constitute reality on mine.
Woman who spend much time on bedspring, may have offspring.
Women don't work as long as men, they do it right 1st time.
You've let the lawn go too far when it requires harvesting.