TCE Demo 2/TCE_DEMO_CD2.iso/demo_cd_.2/mags/diverse/scriba21.arj/scriba21/DATA.BIN/PRT2.DOC

Text File | 1993-02-28 | 42KB | 816 lines

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Ç
üTheNorwegiansgoDutch!
Part2
WildnightsandComputerfun!
Ç
 Thefollowingpersonshavecontributeddirectlytopart2oftheQuest
article,inorderofappearance:
*RichardKarsmakers
*Jurie"Relayer"Horneman
*Laurens"TheMind"vanderKlis
*KaiHolst
*LeifEinarClaus
*Tjeerd"Crush"Bruinsma
*Alex"TheNuttySnake"Croussen
*RR

ü#########################################################################
Ç
üWednesday,December30th,1992
Ç 23:51

 We'vejustendedwatching"RobinHood,PrinceofThieves".Ididnot
enjoyitalot,becauseofthefactthatliterallyäeverybodyÇhadseenit
alreadyandIhadn't.Everybodystartedtalkingallthetime,butIwill
putthingsonholdtoletJurietypesomething.

 Richard

 23:52

 Yes,Richard,youshouldseeitagainbecauseitisactuallyaverygood
movie.Justturnupthebrightnessnexttime.Ibetyou'rethinkingI'm
goingtowritelotsofstuffnow.Noway!I'mnolongerusedtotypingon
thisäawfulÇAtarikeyboard.IprefertheCommodoreAmiga's.

 Jurie

 23:55

 Obviously,Juriedoesnotknowagoodmoviefromanother.Farbetteris
RobinHood,theotherversionwiththecelebratedDutchactorJeroen
Krabbe.NextmovieisBatman2,averyentertainingromp.Richardhasnot
seeniteither.Hisutterignoranceoftheclassicscontinuestoeludeme.
 Atthispointthepenguinisborn.Imustaddthatthepenguinis
actuallythesymbolofthehithertounknowngroupTheQuartermass
Experiment,anexperimentinthepowersofthought.Thisamazingsyndicate
onlyexistsonpaperandinthemindsofitsdistinguishedmembers.What
imaginaryheightsthisassembleehasalreadyreachedisvirtually
unspeakable.Itismuchbetterthanactuallydoinganything!Theaudience
waitinginever-increasinganticipationforeternity.Iwillstopnow.I
fearhoweverthatIwillberemovedbecausethat'sjustthetypeofthing
Richardwoulddowithme.Ah,Iseedestructiononthescreen,ohnoa
Santaismolested!Timeformetotakemydesignatedseatinthisnightof
horrors.IfIcansurvivethiseveningwithunder-andoveragedhumans,
feastingonitemsofdefinitionlessfood,Itrulymusthaveamissionin
life.

 Laurens
üThursday,December31st1992
Ç 00:42(...)
Ç
 Beholdthetime.Wehaveenteredthelastdayof1992now,andthe
atmosphereisreallygreathere."BatmanReturns"ismovingontowardsits
peak(Andconclusion),liquidisbeingconsumedingiganticproportions
(TjeerdandLeif,especially),asisthevarioussnacksweboughtthis(Or
shouldIsaytheprevious?)afternoon.AsIhaveseenthemovietwice
before,I'lltakethisopportunitytoextendthelengthofthisreal-time
articleabit,andIthinkLeifhasthesamethingonhismind.
 TheDutchguysseemtobemoreorlessunwillingtotalkinEnglish,and
thusLeifandIareasgoodascompletelyunabletounderstandwhatthey
aretalkingabout.Whenevertheyspeaktousortalkingaboutsomething
concerningus,theyswitchtoEnglish,though,sowearenotcompletely
leftinthedark.ButIthinkIshallleavethekeystosomeoneelse...

 Kai

 00:55

 Someoneelseatthekeyboardrightnow.Wearecurrentlywatchingkinky
flying-rat-malecomingback,BatmanReturnsinotherwords.Ihaveseenit
beforeonwidescreeninaNorwegiancinema,meaningIdon'treallyneeda
reruin(Thatwasatypingmistakereally,butIkindoffoundit
fitting!).
 DidItellyouaboutthedinnerwehadearlier?IdoinfactbelieveI
didn't.Doyouwannareadaboutit?Yes?ThatprobablymeansIwillhave
towriteaboutit,then(AmazinglylogicalasIam!).Well,actuallyit
wasjustaloadofjunk-food,sinceMirandahadatthemomentbeensacked
orwasonstrikeorsomething.ByaloadIdon'tmeanasave(Ha,ha,ha
extremelyfunny.Myjokesarebecomingasgoodasmylogic!),butareal
load!JunkfoodgenerallytastesthesameonManhattanasitdoes(The
phrase"äEatfloorÇ"wasjustbeingtransmittedtomyearsfromafight
sceneinthefilm.Thereceptionforthephrasewasquiteoverwhelming.
Quoteoftheyear!)indeep-jungleBorneo.NotsoinHolland!AsIhave
commentedonearlier,Dutchpeopleinsistondoingthingsdifferently;
evensowithjunk-food.Well,allIwannasayreallyisthatthemealwas
verygood,unlikemanyotherjunk-foodmealsIhavetasted!
 ImentionedearlierRichard,Kaiandmegoingtotheswimming-pool,butI
forgottomentionafunnythinghappeningto(Oractuallybeside)uson
thebusonourwaythere.Wemetaverycharmingyoungman,doingalotof
sillythingsandmakingfunnysoundslikebanginghisheadwithhishand
(ortheotherwayround,meaningthathewasmaybeactuallytryingtouse
hisheadtodisintegratethewindow,notsuccedingbecauseofhishand
gettinginthewayallthetime!)shouting"Hello!"andscreamingalot
inbetween.Bytheway,Richardisreallygoodatreproducingthat
screaming.MightbesomeconnectiontherethatIamnotquiteabletograb
themeaningof.Anyway,peopleonthebusweresomewhatrelievedwhenthis
guy(Meaningtheretard,notRichard!)finallyleftusinthecompanyof
ourselves.Especiallythosesittinginhisclosevicinitywhohadbeena
bitbusydodginghishandsandatthesametimetryingtolooktotally
unaffected.
 NowI'mgoingtoattemptnotmissingthelastpartofthefilm,andat
thesameconsumingsomedivinefluid(thathasbecomeadimensional
cliche,butIcan'tfigureoutanythingoriginalrightnow).Bye!

 Leif

 01:50

 ("INTHEDUCK!!!!!!!!!"ThePenguinquote!).Batman2isreallyfunny,
especiallyifyouwatchit.ItseemsIhaveconsumedalittletoomuch
ÇPlantiac,butthat'sagoodthingcauseitmakesyouroutlookonlifemuch
better.LeifhasagoodpointaboutusDutchiestalkingtoomuchinDutch
butthat'sprobablybecausewe'reinHolland.
 Forsomereason,Richard'sgotaSTwithaGermankeyboard,whichmakes
typingabitdifficultespeciallysincetherearen'tanyGermansaround.
RereadingthetextI'vejustwrittenmakesmerealiyethatit'sutter
bullshitsoI'llstopnow.Byebyeboysandgirls.

 Tjeerd

 01:55

 Batman2hasended,FatherOfTheBridebegins.

 Jurie

 (Notime!)

 Well,thatwasdeep,wasn'tit.RichardjusttriedtotapemewhileIwas
havingacold.Tjeerdhadtoomuchtodrink.Idon'tagreewithhimabout
theeffects.Well,mustfly.

 J.
á
Ç 01:57

 Theearthshudders,thegroundtrembles,theroomripplesandthetable
vibrates.Aneventofsuchgiganticproportionshastakenplace:ALEXHAS
BEGUNTOWRITE!!!!!!!!
üNEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH
Ç Anotherslightlylessimportanteventalsotookplace:JurieandTjeerd
haveleftthepremises.TjeerdwillbetakenhomebyJurie,andifthey
bothsurvivethedriving-styleoftheGerman-basedDutchman,wewillhear
aboutthemoncemoreinthefuture.Bye,Bye!!!
üNEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH***NEWSFLASH
Ç Drat.Justwhentheunstoppableflowofmyinspirationhadbeguntogush
frommyfingers,thosetwofigureshavetoinfringeonmysolerightto
occupythekeyboard.Thiskeyboard(OrshouldItypekezboard)also
hampersmewithmytyping.SHITQWERTZ!!!
 Erm...Sorryfortheoutburst.Solet'sgetbusyagain...
 WhatIreallywantedtosharewithyou,ifyouareinterested(andeven
ifyouarenot),isaneventthatshookthefoundationsofmyexistence
reallyhard.Warning:ifyoudon'tlikemushydescriptionsofthingsthat
hashappenedtosomepersonwhoisnowsittingbehindthekeyboard,skip
thetexttothenextwhiteline.
 Nah,youdon'twanttoknowaboutthemostgorgeousgirlyoueversaw.
Well,maybeit'sbetterthatway,becauseifyouwouldlookathertoo
close,Imightgetjealous.
 Everhadwriter'sblock?It'shell.Watchwhathappens:...

 Alex

 03:55

 OKAY!(Somuchforenthusiasm,becauseIdiddiscovertheGermankeyboard
aswellandnowrealiseI'llhavetotypewithtwofingersnow)Anyway,
didanybodyrealisethattheconssumptionofCoca-colalightisnowata
frustratinglyhighlevel.(03.57)Quote:"ThankGodforAtheism"Okay,I'm
waitingforMartijntohandmeovertheLznx(Irefusetodealwiththis
Germankezboardsoread"z"for"y"andviseversa.Seezouinaminute,
ÇI'lljusttakeashortinspirationbreak(countto2255)...
 üSOUTHERNCOMFORT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ç (WOW!how'sthatforaninspirationbreak)

 RR

 4:08

 FatheroftheBridemustbethemostseriouscomedyever.Ithadonejoke
andtherestwassoft-focussentimentality.AlthoughIusuallylikethat
happeningtomyself,Idonotwishtowatchotherpeoplebeinghappy.Ah,
anothermoviehatangefangen.?!?!ß
 RenbilhosShell??Aargh,evensubtitlesinthisweirdlanguage.The
FisherKingdrawseveryonetowardstheglimmeringscreen.Icannottake
muchmoreIguess,Ihaveseenitalreadyanyway.Strangehowitseemsto
endandjustgoesonforanotherthirtyminutes.Ihavejustheardthat
dirtywordslike"fuck"arenottranslatedintheNorwegiansubtitles.
Thismeansthatthousandsofinnocentsaredeprivedofthecreamof
Americanculture.Itisashame.Thosewhohaveseen"BlueVelvet"know
thatthequintessesofthissortofverbosityispersonifiedbyFrank,
playedbyDennisHopper,whomanagestoinsertthisfour-letterwordat
leastoncepersentencepreferablytwice.Orasoloappearanceif
possible.Surreptiously,Richardhasnowgrabbedholdofthecamera
althoughhisaimiswaningonparwithhissanity.Ihavebeenwondering
abouthismentalconditioneversinceheproposedtome.StrangehowI
suddenlyamunabletobreathbutIneednoairtocontinuepesteringyou,
dearreader.IexperienceavisionofTjeerdBruinsma,themanwhomight
becaughtlaughingwhilstbeingskinnedalive.Heissuchanangel.Imust
havedozedoffforaminutebecauseatleasthalfanhourhaspassedsince
Istartedthistext.Whatisitintheatmospherethatacceleratesthe
decayofnervecellsexponentially?Isitthefoulodorofvaporized
alcoholortheliesandtreacheryofacertainONE.ThisONEwillreceive
aspeciallypreparedtapewithsubliminalmessagesrecordeduponit:"Yes,
youarealoser","Everythingyoutryfails","Youcannotdoanything
right","Everybodyhatesyou".AfterthistextitisclearIcannotrightly
holdmytitleasTheMind.ApparentlyIhaveenteredanalteredstateof
consciousness,anenlightmentyoumightsay.Inowknowmyrealname,
praiseme.

 IOFTHEUNIVERSE

 06:16

 We'vejustfinishedwatching"TheFisherKing".IthinkI'llhaveto
watchitagaininpeaceandquietoneday,forIguessmygeneral
sleepiness(Yes,myeyesaregettinginitialproblemswithkeeping
themselvesopen)preventedmefromgettingallofit.
 "Iguessthisfilmwastoointellectualanyway.OrperhapsIamtoo
unintellectual."Luciferquote
 Nowwe'llgoandsee"UniversalSoldier".Ishouldthinkthatwillmanage
inkeepingmyeyesopen.Atleastsortof.

 Richard

 08:06

 Thebirdshavestartedsingingoutside,andwehavejustceasedwatching
antotally,utterlycrapfilmcalled"UniversalSoldier".Hopefully
everyonewillgohomearoundnowish,andthenIwillsimplygotosleep.
Seeyou"tomorrow"!
Ç
 Leif

 08:04(Actuallyitwas08:09)

 Goodbye!Farewell!Alex(A.K.A.TheNuttySnake,Knom,Nezuorc,etcetc.)
isdeparting,andsoisLaurens....Bye!

 Alex

 08:12

 Beddybyes!

 Richard

 15:44

 Wake-uptime!Myrhythmofdayandnighthasneverbeenastotallyfucked
upasitisnow.AsRichardputit,IfeellikeitisnineO'clockinthe
morning.
 Lastnightwasallveryentertaing,althoughnotallthefilmswereas
attention-grabbing.MartindugoutRichard'sLynxinthemiddleofFisher
King,andwasn'tseeneversince.ThatisuntilUniversalSoldierstarted.
Strangereallythateveryonewatchedthatcrap,andnottheTerryGilliam
masterpiece(Iwouldreallycallitaworkofart!).
 Kronosisontheloose!Insomesuper-hamsterishmentalwaythatlittle
nearly-rat-resemblingthingyhaspersuadedRichardtoactuallyletitout
ofitscage.Aaargh!Wearealldoomed!Well,maybenot.Amicroscopic
littlemobilefurisn'texactlythemostfright-inspiringsightever!
 Kaihasn'tevenopenedhiseyesyet!Notthatweactivelyhavetried
helpinghimwiththatsurelywearyingtask.Yet,thatis!

 Leif

 16:03

 Kaiisstilloutcold.OratleastasfarasIknowhesurelyappearsto
be.Ithinkitwouldbewiseforustoheadtotownsoon,forotherwisewe
shan'tbeabletogetourhandsonanyfireworks!

 Richard

 17:15

 We(Leifandme)arebackfromtown,wherewejoinedthepost-deadline
rushtogetsomefireworkstoputfiretoatmidnight.WefoundKai
writingpostcards,listeningtoR.E.M.(Thoseguysthatsaidtheywere
uncommercialbutwhonowaren't).Idon'tlikethesinger'svoiceatall,
andIgenerallyfindtheirmusicsadlydepressing.
 Yesterdayeveningatabouteight,theZ88"batterylow"indicatorgoton.
IhastilyportedallstuffontotheST,andallentriesstartingat23:51,
December30th1992,havebeentypedontheST.Iwillnowexit"1stWord
Plus"andattempttoconverttheZ88DUMPfilesintosomethingthatmy
wordprocessorunderstands.

 Richard

 18:03

Ç We'retapingnow.Wewillprobablyspendmostoftomorrowtapingaswell,
asIhavesomeCDsKaiwantstohave,whereasIalsowantedWasp's"The
CrimsonIdol"andMcAlpine's"FreedomtoFly".Thiseveningwewilleat
pea'ssoup,thenwatch"TheMakingofMarriedwithChildren"(Startsat
19:15),theneatpancakesandspendtherestoftheeveningdoing
somethingwedon'tknowyet.
 Andatmidnightallhellwillbreakloose:WitchingHour!

 Richard

 18:24

 KaiandIhavebought10cassettestomakerecordingson,butstillI
don'tthinkthatwillbeenough.RichardhasgotloadsofstuffIwould
wanttotape.Healsohasgotalotofjunkinmyopinion,butthenagain
Iappreciatepeoplehavingdifferentandmixedtastes(Exceptforpeople
actuallylisteningtoKrissKross,NKotB,DrAlbanandsoonwhentheyare
homealonenotneedingtoactanappearance,ifyouunderstandwhatI
mean).
 AgainIhavediscoveredsomethingstrangeaboutDutchpeople.Theyreally
provideanendlesssupplyofstrangenesstome,muchtoRichard'sdislike,
butIintendnoharm,andIhopehetakesitasthejokestheyare
supposedtobe.Anyway,thisparticularcaseconcernsfireworks;that
Chineseinventionscaringtheshitoutofcatsanddogs(Nottomention
hamsters!)onNewYear'sEve.InNorwaywearecontentatmakingthesky
explodeexactlyonNewYear'sEve,notsohereinHolland.I'velostquite
afewhourssleeplatelybecauseofmanicDutchswithalackof
comprehensionfortimeanddate.Theygoonallnightwiththemostnoisy
fireworkstheypossess,makingmewakeupeveryquarterofanhour.Very
nicewhenyouwenttosleepathalfpasteightinthemorning!
 Soonthere'sfeedingtimeagain.Thistimewithpeasoup,televisionand
pancakes.Yummy!

 Leif
üFriday,January1st1993
Ç 00:42

 HappyNewYear.(Let'sjusthopeitgetswarmerthan1992!)!Wehavejust
returnedinfromdoingthefireworksstuff,whichreallywasahorrifying
experience.Sparks,rocketsandscreamerswentinalldirections,
especiallywherevertherehappenedtobeanyNorwegianspresent,soIfeel
rathernervousnow,asIdidallthetimewewereoutside.
 WearebouttoletsomeOliebollen(Oilballs?)filloutbellies,andwe
aretowatchthestuffwehavefilmedalready,approximatelyanhourof
greatentertainment,especiallythelastscetch...

 Kai

 02:28

 Normally,thisnightisthenightIgotobedlatest.But,afterchecking
outallourrecordingssofarinthe"HomeVid'WeFoundNoNameFor"and
eatingthoseOliebollen,wehavedecidedunanimouslythatgoingtobedat
aslightlylessunholyhourwouldperhapsbeagoodidea.
 AlmostaquarterofanhouroftheVid'wastapedjustaftermidnight.
It'sbasicallyaBagdadesquecollectionofexplosionsintertwinedwith
eruptingvolcanothings,berzerkedlyloudthingsthatgoboom,whining
arrowcriesthatscorntheskies,huddledshadowsrunningtoandfro,and
anythingthatwouldmakeMr.Arnetthaveanear-lethaldeja-vu.
 Largebitsofthevideosufferedofmeagrelighting.It'squitedifficult
Çtogeteverythingright,actually.Perhaps,however,thiscanbeblamed
partlyontheTVsetwhichisabitdarkerthanitshouldbe.
 KaiandLeif,whohaddisappearedfromtheroomacoupleofmomentsago,
havereappeared.Mirandahasjustgonetoembraceherpillow,andIguess
itwon'tbelonguntilwewillallbe.ThebothNorthernersjustnow
brabbledsomethinginNorwegianagain.Iguessthey'llneverlearnandI
don'tfeelaparticularurgetopunishthemphysicallyforit.
 Tomorrowwe'llprobablygetupratherintimetodoallthetaping.We
stillhave"Flatliners"towatch(We'vewatched"TheNightbreed"earlier
tonight,from20:00to21:30),too,aswellastheüSTNewsÇChristmas
CodingConvention1990Vid'"whichnoneoftheseNorthernchapshaveseen
sofar.
 IguessIwillspendalargepartoftomorrowtryingtorememberother
variousbitsandbobsthathavenotyetbeenimmortalizedbymeansofthis
real-timearticle.Also,Imightactuallydosomelay-outingandspell-
checkingonthepreviousfiles(theonesthatwereuploadedfromtheZ88).
Basicallywealsowanttomakesureit'satleast128Kb.Ithinkit's
quiteappropriateforaNorwegian/Dutchreal-timearticleatleasttohave
thesizeofatrueCrazyLetter,forwhichthatkilobytageistheofficial
spec.
 Signingofffornow,andprobablyfortherestofthisnight(thoughwe
canneverbecertain),

 Richard

 02:34

 Gettingslightlyphilosophicalthislateintheevening(well,night
actually).We'vesuccessfullyentered1993.Asusualitwilltakeamonth
ortwobeforeonegetsusedtowritingthat'93correctly,notcontinually
makingmistakeswhenwritinglettersandsoon.
 ForthefirsttimeinmylifeIhaveexperiencedNewYear'sEve
celebrationoutsideNorway.Thewholeexperiencewasratherscaryactually
(Herewegoagain!),especiallysinceDutchpeoplepreferhavingalltheir
fireworksgooffatgroundlevelinsteadofinamorekindofskyish
level.Notthatitmatteredmuchanywaysincethesmogmadeitdifficult
watchinganythingelevatedmorethantwometresoffground.AlsoIhave
greatdoubtsaboutevenhalfoftheDutchfireworkseverbeingallowedfor
useinNorway.Mostofitflewinallkindsofdirections,preferablyten
centimetresaboveourheads,butoftenlower.üÇButthatisenoughofme
complainingaboutDutchstrangenessfortoday.Iwillprobablycontinue
tomorrow(ifRichardhasn'tstrangledmebythen!),sowatchthisspace!

 Leif

 11:11

 Anotherday,monthandyearhaveofficiallybegunasIwritethis.I
emergedfromtheTwilightYoneofdreamlessnightsalmostfifteenminutes
ago,onlytobedisappointedaboutthefactthatRichardfailedingetting
usupat10:30.Icannowhearhimlurkingthecorridors(Oractually;the
corridor)oftheapartment,soIguesshehasfinallywokeup.
 Wewenttobedataboutthreeam,mesleepingonthecouchnexttothe
phoneinthelivingroomandLeifoccupyingthesparebed.Ifellasleep
ratherquickly,butwassuddenlyawokenbythedarnsoundoftheverysame
communicationdeviceIsleptannoyinglycloseto.
 Decidingtoignoreittotally,Ijustturnedaroundandtriedtopretend
thenoisewascomingfromoutside,whichdidn'tactuallysucceed.After
thephoneringingabouttentimesorso,Igottooirritatedwithit,and
fumbledforthelightswitch.Thelightwasslightlybrightforadazed
Çeye,andthusIwasdelayedyetacoupleofsecondsbeforeIcould
actuallypickupthephone.ButIdidhavealookatmywatch.Ittoldme
thetimewas03:25
 ItwasGard,akaTheInsanelyWittyOne/Zealot/TheLazyLion/OhGard
etc...HewascallingtowishRichardahappynewyearandthatkindof
stuff,andwasunimaginablydisappointedtohearthathehadactuallygone
tobed!Wetalkedforabouttenminutesaboutvarioustopicsbefore
Jardar,hisolderbrother,urgedhimtocuttheconversationshort.Oh
yeah,here'samessagetoallthereadersfromGardandJardar:"Wewish
youallaHappyNewYear!"
 Breakfasttime!!!

 Kai

 11:44

 Yo!Asplendidmorningitis,January1st1993.KaitoldmeGardcalled
somewherearoundthreeandthatDragTheInsanelyWittyOne,TheFoldable
One,OhGard,TheOneResponsibleForThisIssue'sCornerOfLament,The
LoneliestOfNorwegians,ZealotofO.U.C.H.,MainEditorofScriba
CommunisResponsum,TheOneWhoGotClobberedOverTheHeadWithA
BaseballBat,WearerOfBlackMetalT-Shirts,TheOneInLoveWithA
MultitudeOfWomen,CreatorOfThe845KbUltimateCrazyLetter,The
OldestNorwegianVirgin,TheInfinitelyInsultableOne,TheOne(AndOnly)
HaterofPlantiac,TheOneWithTheSillyExcuseForAMoustache,Thinnest
OfNortherners,DwellerOfEggesbønes,DirectorOf"OUCHHomeVid"Parts
OneToThree,HeavyMetalWorshipper,TheToplessOne,wouldcallback
latertoday.
 Tapinghasstartedalready.Itseemsthat,apartfromtheoccasional
enhancementstothecodeofourrespectiveviruskillers,notmuchhas
actuallybeenädoneÇhereduringthevisit.Nothingthatwillleavean
impactonposterity,atleast.OriginallyScribaCommunisResponsumwas
supposedtobefinishedatmyplaceduringthesedays,butGardhadthe
sourceathome(suddenlyhehadconsidereditnecessarytorewritethe
wholethingin"C"orsomething)sobasicallyitcouldn'thappen.
 Good.I'llleaveitatthatfornow.

 Richard

 12:05

 Upandrunning!Forthefirsttimeduringourstayherewehavegotten
ourbodiesoutofbedatareasonablehour!
 Todaywillmostlyconsistoftaping,sincetomorrowwewillhavetoget
upratherearlytogettoAmsterdam.Richardwillhopefullycomewithus.
ButIamabitconcernedaboutgettingupataround9am.Asitisnow
whentheclockturns1pmitfeelslike9am!Wewilljusthavetomanage.
 IjustheardfromKaithatGardcalledsometimeduringthenight.That
doesexplainacertainwakinguponmypart.IthoughtIheardanalarm-
clockdoingsomethingitdefinitelyshouldnotdointhemiddleofthe
night.AndasIlayinbedponderingonvariousvariationsonacertainf-
word,IagainstartedwonderingaboutthesestrangeDutchoneshavingsome
weirdthoughtsaboutwhentogetupatthefirstofJanuary.Anyway,this
timemythoughtswerefalsifiedsadly,sinceIwouldn'tmindteasing
Richardabitmore!

 Leif

 13:36

Ç Hey,whathappenedtomyinspiration?Ican'tseemtofinditanywhere,
andneithercanLeif,whoiscurrentlytryingtowriteapostcardtoa
êveryÇdroolableobjectnamedElizabeth(WholivesinTromsø!).Richardis
rapinghisguitaragain;Alotofstrangesoundsindicateanotquite
perfectattempttoplayalongwithasongIdon'tknowwhatiscallednor
bywhomitis.
 Gard,bytheway,moreorlesspromisedthathewouldcallbacklateron
todaytoactuallytalktoRichard,butconsideringhisbiorhythmI'dbe
surprisedifhe'sevenawakeyet!
 Richardissadlycorrectonthetopicofwhetherornotwehaveactually
donesomethingwhilewe'vebeenhere.Ihavefixedacoupleofbugsand
improvedsomestatisticsinAntidoteaswellascorrectingalotofthings
inRichard'sviruskiller,andI'vewrittenalittleinthisreal-time
article,butthatisall!AndLeifandIhavehelpeddoingthedishes
everydaysincewecamehere!(Richarddidn'tmind...)Ihavebarelyhad
timetowritemyfavouritegirlaletter(Sob),butthatisnotduetotoo
muchwork.
 Sonowwejustsitaroundandlistentomusic,generallydoingnothing.
ButnowIshallhandthekeyboardovertothefirstpersonwhowouldlike
towritesomething.

 Kai

 13:51

 MetalChurch(ThesongKaididn'tknowaboveisoneoftheMetalChurch
classics"GodsofWrath")isenrichingtheatmosphereconsiderably.If
onlyStefanhasbeenhere,theseNorthieswouldhaveseenusflipoutina
slightlytotalway.
 Iwillnotwritemorenow,asIwouldactuallywanttoeditsomeofthe
originalZ88filesintoaformthatyouwillnowalreadyhaveread(And,
hopefully,appreciatedifnotadmired).

 Richard

 14:17

 AmIfeelinglossofcontrol?
 Isthisallthatremains?
 FearofGodisplaying.MyGod(InwhomImostzealouslyunbelieve),Dawn
Crosby'sthroatmustbeoneofthemostuniquevoicesanywhere.Itmakes
merecalltheconcertsI'veseen,thehandthatIshook,thedrunkenkiss
onmycheek,thesignaturethatlooksasundecipherableasancient
Egyptianbecauseofhersignature-murderingdrunkenness.
 Reallyexcellent.Farout.Offthisworld.

 Richard

 15:48

 Moretaping.Somesoftwarecopying(PublicDomainstuffonly,mindyou!),
somefurthercodingatviruskillers...
 That'sbasicallywhatwe'redoing.Mirandathismorningwentdowntothe
SouthoftheNetherlands(atowncalledBerkel-Enschot)tovisither
parentsandwishthemhappynewyear.Sheseemsquiteunawareofthefact
thatwe'veactuallygotatelephonesystemhere,butIguessthereisn't
muchtodoforherhere.

 Richard

Ç 16:47

 Yesterdayevening,whenKaiwenttobed,hetoldmehewouldwriteälotsÇ
today.Hesaidsomethingabout'reaching100Kb'andthatsortofthing,
butitwouldappearthatheisnotmuchofamanofhisword.Anyway,here
IamtryingtogetthisarticlesomewhatbiggerwhilelisteningtoMarty
Friedman's"Scenes"-oneofthebestsoftguitarCDseverifyouaskme.

 Richard

 16:51

 Richardjustcameoverurgingmetowritesomething.Probablyhisonly
intentionwashavingthewholesofaforhimself,butanywayhereIam.
 Rightnowwearelisteningtosomefuckingly,maneatingly,virgin-
rapingly,cock-suckingly,double-fist-screwingly,pussy-lickinglygood
music.Allthosefilthywordsputtogetheraretheretomakeupforthe
lackofthemintherestofthearticle,sortofmakesthejobeasierfor
thecensors.NotthatIthinkRichardisevergoingtoletüSTNewsÇbe
subjectedtosomeglasses-on-tip-of-nose-hair-tied-back-in-a-knotold
school-teacherlookalikesavingusfromdamaginglanguageabuse.There
wouldn'tbemuchleftofüSTNewsÇthenwouldit?Ah,justkidding!
 Usreaching100KbtodayismuchlikebelievinginSantaClausorrain
fallingupwards(!)orRichardburninghisCD-collectionorhimlistening
tohip-hopactuallyenjoyingitorGardevergettinglaidorhimever
shavingoffhismoustacheetcetera.Toputitshortitisarathernot-
very-likelyevent.
 Havetocopysomedisks!

 Leif

 17:33

 "Flatliners"comingup-thelastfilmwerentedandthatwehadn'tquite
comearoundtoviewing.Kaiisstilldoingsome"Antidote"coding,theTV
setiswarmingup(Ittakesabout15minutestodothat)andLeifwantsto
copythe"Ventura"demo.ThisdemoisquiteOK,bythebye,butIdon't
likethefactthatACFseemstohavecontributedsomething(yes,theAlien
ChildFornicators).
 Anyway,Iamgettingquitehungry.I'mwaitingforMirandatoarrive,
afterwhichwecanordersomepizzastobedeliveredhere.Icanalmost
tastethemonmytongue-aprospectthatmakessalivaexcreteitselffrom
variousglandsinandaroundmyoralopening.
 Enoughofthis.TheTViswarmingupstill,andKaiandLeifare
discussingsomethinginastrangedialect.JuliaRoberts,herewecome!

 Richard

 20:23

 Yep.It'smeagain(Not-me-)."Flatliners"wasalotbetterthanIhad
expected(Ihadexpectedittobegood,butitwasactuallyquite
brilliant)andthepizzasafterwardswentdownsmoothly,eventhoughLeif
(Ofcourse)justähadÇtomentionthat,actually,Norwegianpizzasaremuch
better.
 PersonallyIwouldn'tbesurprisedifNorwegianpizzaswereactually
betterthantheItalian.
 Not.
 "You'rerightaboutonething.TheyareactuallybetterthanItalian
pizzas.Atleasttheone'säwe'reÇusedto."Kaiquote.
Ç IguessKailivesinfuckingValhallaorsomething!Inowhavetoleave.
Iwillgotothebedroomandbeatupapillow.

 Richard

 20:29

 Poorpillow.Icanalmosthearthedefenceless,inanimateobjctcryits
heartoutasRichardispunchingitwithcruel,mercilessstrokes.
 Thepizzawasactuallyratherzarjaz,sotospeak;Somedoughwithcheap
cheeze,verylittlespice,sometomatosauceandstore-to-doordelivery.
Andtuna.AdisappointmenttoanysophisticatedNorwegianmouth,really.
Buthungeristhebestcook,soitwentdownnevertheless.
 Ireallyenjoyedthedessert;Anicecakewithsomesparklingfirework
stuffontopofit.THATatleasttasteddeliciously!!!

 Kai

 21:34

 That'sthanksforyou.

 Richard
üSaturday,January2nd1993
Ç 01:04

 WehaveenteredthelastdayoftheNutties'visittomyhumbleplace.
Theplacewherenoteventhelooescapedfrombitingcriticism.Kaiandme
willbegoingtoour(separate!)beds,withLeifintendingtodosomemore
taping.HeseemstohavecopiedatleastfifteenCDsbynow,butIguess
thisisaonceinalifetimeexperiencetohim.
 Tomorrowwe'llbegettingupquiteintime.WewillgotoAmsterdamin
themorningsothattheystillhavesometimetovisitseveralshops
there.OfcourseIwilljointhemtomakesurethattheydon'tendupin
somepimp'sworkingplace-orworse!
 "IamsureGardwouldn'tmindthat."Kaiquote!
 Inmybedthereisanenormousloadofmillionsandmillionsof
carbohydratesheldtogetherbyproteinmembranes.Somehow,Ifinditnice
tocuddleuptothosemillionsofcellsthathappentoconnectintothe
formofthegirlIloveandwanttobewithmorethananythingelse.She
isthelightofmylife,thebutterflyofmyflower,thebeeofmy
activity,andprobablyalotmore.ActuallyIfeelslightlyintoxicated,
fortodayPlantiachascausedsomenicetasteexperiencesagain.Lasttime
we'vedrunkPlantiacmusthavebeen...er...twodaysago.Atleast.Yes,I
seemtorememberquitedistinctlythatwe'vedrunkquitealotofit
duringthevideoorgy.Oratleastthefirsthalfofit,wheneverybody
wasstillquiteawake.
 Ithinkwe'vefinishedalmostfourbottlesofPlantiacinthefivedays
thathavefledbyasifnothingcouldkeepthem.Youcan'tactuallysay
we'vebeengettingabsurdlydrunk,butwe'vehadourshareoftipsinessI
reckon.
 IwillloveKaiifhewillwritesomethingtoobeforeheheadstobedand
enterstheValhallaofdreams.
 'Night.

 Richard

 01:13

 NowIammakingRichardloveme.Somehow,it'snotlikeIhadimagined
Çlove,butI'lljusthavetomanage.(AsifI'deverloveanybodyelsethan
aspecialAmericanette...)
 WearegettingclosetothedeparturefromRichardandMiranda'shome,a
momentIhavebeenawaitingwithhorror;Areourfivedaysherealready
over?Arewenolongergoingtobeabletonagthesewonderfulpeople
abouttheirminoritycomplexes?ArewenolongergoingtodrinkPlantiac
withRichardandhisfriends?Thisistrulyasadoccurence.Ilovethe
Dutchpeople,howeverdifferenttheymightbefromthepeopleIusually
hangaroundwith.Theyarepoliteandtheytalkaboutinterestingthings.
Theytakeaninterestinus,andtrytomakeusascomfortableaspossible
whilewearehere.Theyaregreat.Therearenootherwordstodescribe
them.
 ButIshallmostprobablywriteevenmoreingratitudeinthemorning;
FornowIshallexecutesleepmodeafteraGEMDOS$20call.Inotherwords,
sleepwillbesupervisingme...

 Kai

 01:25

 Wow!Completeanduttersilence!Well,exceptfortheinevitableMegafile
60humminginthe(Richardjustenteredlookingextremelytired,
apparentlyhavingforgottensomethingveryimportantsincethislineof
actionprobablymeantleavingthewarmbodyofacertainfemalecompletely
alone!)background,andKronosdoingsomeheavymarathon-sprinting
training.Atthetimebeingonlythehamstersarekeepingmecompanysince
everyoneelsehasenteredDreamland(Norwegianexpression.I'mnotquite
certainifitexistsinEnglish,butyougetthegeneralpicture!).
 ImustsaythatIagreetotallywithKai'sdescriptionofourhosts.I
couldprobablyaddquiteabittoo,butIwillsavethosebitsforlater.
MaybeevenforapersonalletterforRichard.We'llsee.
 TheonlyreasonwhyIamstillupisthattherearestillhoursleftof
musictorecord,andsinceI'msleepingonthecouchtonightthatmeans
I'mlocatednearesttothestereo,leavingmedoingthedirty-work.Well,
theyaremostlyformyself,soIcan'tblameanyone.
 TomorrowwearegoingtoAmsterdam,whichIaminawaylookingforward
to,althoughthatalsomeanswearegoingtoseeRichard'sapartmentfor
thelasttime(Hehasprobablymovedwhenweoncegetbackhere!).By
tomorrowIdoofcoursemeantoday,butIcan'thelpmyselfalwaysfinding
itstrangetotalkabouttodaywhenIhaven'tsleptyet,butIhavesort
ofgottenusedtoitlately.Hmmm,wonderwhatthereasonforthatis!
 IhavejustputonMegadeth's"RustinPeace"(Justonhead-phones,mind
you!)whichisquitehead-choppingly(forgotthatonelasttime!)good.
 Theclockhasjustrunpast2amandI'msigningoff,andthat,asthey
say,isit.

 Leif
üSaturday,January2nd1993
Ç 09:49

 Everyoneisgettingupnow.Iexpectwe'llbeinAmsterdambytwelve
o'clock,perhapsslightlysooner.Thatleavesuswithaboutfivehours
(perhapsmore)todosomeshoppingthere.I'vedecidedtotakethevideo
cameraalong-IhopeIwon'tlivetoregretit.Ithinkitwillbe
possibletodosomeratherinterestingshotsinourbeautifulnation's
capital,dirtyandobscenethoughthiscitymaybe.
 Imightevenjointhemagaintomorrow,whichwillbethedayonwhich
theyactuallytakeoff.Iamnotsureaboutit,though,foritwould
involvegoingtoSchipholairportagain-andI'mnoteventoosure
whetherornotyoucanactuallypenetratetheairwaysystematallwhen
Çyou'rejusttotingacamerainsteadofpassportandboardingticket.
 Leifjusttoldmehewenttobedatabouthalfpastthree."Butatleast
Ihavealotofmusic,"hesaid,usinghisfiststoscareoffthesleep
fromhiseyes.
 NextweekIwillnothavetogotoschoolyet,soI'llhaveanexcellent
opportunitytocatchsomemoresleep.Also,Iwillfinishversion5.7of
my"UltimateVirusKiller"(Which,incidentally,wasproclaimedoneofthe
all-overtop20Christmasbuysin"STFormat"!).Idon'tthinkI'llget
thethinganyfaster,butatleastIshouldbeabletomakeitgoodenough
forittobesoldagainandbeathelloutofthecompetition.AsIthink
I'venowreachedthepositionofmarketleader(orindustrystandard,or
whatever),itisvitallyimportantnottohavemekickedoffthatposition
bythecompetition.TheonlycompetitionatthemomentseemstobeKai's
"Antidote",whichisactuallyprettydamnexcellentandexceedinglyfast.
Istillbeatitonsheerstatistics,though.InGermany,too,thereare
someviruskillersthatareworthwhilekeepinganeyeon-theyarefully
GEMcompatible,whichsomehowmakesmanypeoplebuythemeventhoughtheir
statisticsarepukablybad.Mostofthemdon'trecognizeähalfÇofthe
viruses,letalonetheotherdisksandstuff.Itshowsthatthe
programmersoftheseprogramsareoutforafastbuckwiththeleast
possibleamountofresearch-theprogramsdon'trecognizemuchyetthey
areanypricebetween40and100Germanmarks!
 Today'sfirstmusicisSodom's"AgentOrange".Stefanmightnotactually
behereinbody,butatleasthe'shereinspirit(Well,perhapsnoteven
that).InhishonourIthoughtitwouldbeneattowakeuptheNutties
withthisCD,whichhasbeenknownamongotherguestsalreadytobean
excellentde-sedative.
 Andit'squitegood,too.
 OnceIgetbackfromAmsterdamtoday,itwillbetimetosurveythe
damage.Analmostemptyfridge.AlmostnoCoke.Aseriousdecimationof
Plantiacbottles.ProbablytheoddNorwegianitemlyingaround,forgotten,
waitingformetosenditafteritsrightfulowneratsignificantpostage
costs.
 Idon'tthinkI'lleverbeabletolistentoBelCanto's"Shimmering,
WarmandBright"withoutgettingflashbacksofNorthernersinsultingmy
toilet,drinking,lightingfireworks,talktheirfunnylanguage,andsleep
onmycouch.
 NowIcometothinkofit,IthinkIshouldprobablyopenallwindows
possiblewhenweleave.Thehouse,sighingdeeply,willhavetogetto
gripswithrealityagain-nomatterhowmuchbetterrealitymightbe.
 MyamplifierandCDplayerhaveworkedovertime.äIÇhaveworkedovertime.
IthinkI'vesleptanaverageoffivehourspernight,whichisnot
exactlytheamountIneed(Whichismorelikeeightornineperday,
really).Idon'tfeelill-atleastnotyet.Iheardthey'veopeneda
VirginMegastoreinAmsterdamafterthelasttimeI'vebeenthere.Let's
hopeitwillbeasinterestingastheoneinOxfordStreet,London.
 Thisreal-timearticle,Iguess,willnotreachthedesignated128Kbor
more.Rather,Ithinkweshouldbehappyifitreaches100Kbonceit's
edited,dividedandspellchecked.Althoughitsquantityhasperhapslet
youdown,Iamsurethequalityhasn't.
 OramIandhasit?

 Richard

 10:24

 Someinsaneguitarthrashinggoingoninthebackground(Orforeground,
consideringtheloudness!).Richardsaysit'sthebestguitar-soloever,I
won'ttakehiswordforit!
 Well,anyway,thisisourlasthoursinUtrecht,sinceIthinkwewillbe
ÇleavingforAmsterdaminashortwhile.Thisnightdidn'tcontainmuch
sleepformeneither,bytheway.Iwasuprecordingmusicuntilaround
3.30am.SoIhaven'tgotmyeyeswideopenyet.Well,thatwon'thappen
anywayuntilIputonmycontact-lens,butstillusuallymyeyesareabit
moreunclosedwhenIwakeup.

 Leif

 10:42

 ThefinalentrytobemadeLIVEinUtrechtforthisreal-timearticle.
Yes,it'sme(Not-me-)again.Ihavejustfinishedashowerwhichdid
miraclestoanumbbody(Iemine),andhavestartedpackingallmythings,
includingtheChristmaspresentsandcomputerstuff.Wewillinnottoo
longleaveforAmsterdam,wherewewilldosomeshopping,aswellas
findingahoteltospendthenight.LeifandIwillbewritingonhis
Portfolioonthewayhome,somorewillactuallybeaddedtothisarticle.
NowLeifwantstotakeover.Seeya'soon!

 Kai

 10:45

 We'rekindofpoppingof.Well,notsomesortoffaery-popping-ofor
wizard-popping-of,butsortperfectlyhumanlyleaving-by-the-doorpopping-
of.Byefornow!

 Leif

üEndofPart2Ç