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FDate: Sun, 6 Aug 95 3:20:01 EDT
From: Wayne Davison <wayne@tenor.clarinet.com>
Newgroups: rec.humor.funny
Subject: Win95 vs Jesus Christ
[I got this from my brother who got it from somebody at work.]
If you have half a brain, you can't help but notice the throng of
publications, analists and net users declaring Windows 95 the
Saviour of the Computer Industry. If you have less than half a
brain, you probably believe it. Could it be?
Let's compare Windows 95 against a widely-accepted Saviour, Jesus
of Nazareth:
Jesus Windows 95
--------------------------------------+--------------------------
Said, "Surely I come quickly." | Has been promised "any day
now."
Is taking a lot longer to actually | Is taking a lot longer to
arrive actually arrive.
Can walk on water. | Can crawl on a 486.
Sits in judgement at the pearly gates.| Will be used to judge Bill
Gates.
Bible says, "In Him, all things are | Windows 95 doesn't even
possible." run all possible Windows
apps.
Started life as a carpenter. | Turns perfectly good
computers into furniture.
Born in a manger. | Resembles something found
in a barn.
Remembered for protecting the weak. | Has weak memory
protection.
Was raised from the dead. | Was created from Windows
3.1.
Jesus performed great works for | Windows 95 multitasking
the multitudes performance barely works.
Jesus has no sin. | Windows 95 has no shame.
--------------------------------------+--------------------------
You decide.
--
Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to funny@clari.net.
Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply.
Remember: PLEASE spell check and proofread your jokes. You think I have
time to hand-correct everybody's postings?