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           ╧.╨.═., ╘╚┼ ┼═╨┼╥╧╥'╙ ╬┼╫ ├╠╧╘╚┼╙, ┴╬─ ╘╚┼ ╙╨╔├┼ ╘╥┴─┼
           ******************************************************

     ┘OU DON'T HAVE TO BE A ├OMMODORE OWNER VERY LONG BEFORE YOU
START HEARING IT. ╔T IS FAVORITE TOPIC OF DISCUSSION AT ╒SER ╟ROUP
MEETINGS, IN THE ON-LINE MESSAGES ON ┬ULLETIN ┬OARD ╙YSTEMS, AND IN
EDITORIALS IN ├OMMODORE  SPECIFIC COMPUTER MAGAZINES. ╫E ALL
COMPLAIN HOW OWNERS OF OTHER COMPUTER BRANDS, SALESMEN IN "REAL
COMPUTER" STORES, EDUCATORS, AND EVEN THE GENERAL PUBLIC; THEY ALL
LOOK DOWN THEIR COLLECTIVE NOSES AT OUR COMPUTER. ╘HE GENERAL PUBLIC
HAS EITHER NEVER HEARD OF IT, OR HAS HEARD STORIES THAT IT IS JUST A
TOY, OR BUGGY, OR UNDER POWERED, OR NOT A SERIOUS COMPUTER, OR...AD
NASEUM. ╔ MEAN, THERE IS JUST SO MUCH HOSTILITY AND MIS-INFORMATION
OUT THERE, YOU'D THINK THERE WAS SOME KIND OF CONSPIRACY GOING ON
THAT WE DON'T KNOW ABOUT.
     ╫ELL, ┬UCKO, THERE IS! ╚OWEVER, IT IS A "VOLUNTEER" CONSPIRACY.
╔T DOES NOT HAVE LEADERS OR ORGANIZATION, BUT IT IS VERY WIDESPREAD
AND EXTREMELY POWERFUL. ╙OME OF THE MEMBERS OF THE CONSPIRACY ARE
MALICIOUS AND EVIL, BUT THE GREAT MAJORITY ARE OF THE
FAT-DUMB-&-HAPPY VARIETY. ╘HIS LAST GROUP HAS LEARNED ABOUT
COMPUTERS UP TO THE POINT WHERE THEIR HEADS HAVE STARTED TO HURT,
AND THEN THEY FIGURED THAT THEY HAD LEARNED ENOUGH. ╘HIS IS NOT
EVIL; THIS IS JUST HUMAN NATURE. ╫E SEEK THE MOST BENEFIT FROM THE
LEAST EFFORT. ╘HINKING FOR YOURSELF REQUIRES EFFORT AND TIME. ╔T IS
MUCH EASIER TO ACCEPT THE VIEWPOINT OF OTHERS THAN TO INVESTIGATE
EVERY LITTLE NIT-PICKING DETAIL YOURSELF. ╘HIS IS ESPECIALLY TRUE IN
SELECTING COMPUTERS. ╘HE AVERAGE PERSON HAS NEITHER THE TIME OR
INTEREST TO SIFT FACT FROM FICTION ABOUT ├OMMODORE COMPUTERS. ═OST
PEOPLE ASK THEIR FRIENDS OR RELY ON THE RECOMMENDATION OF SALESMEN
IN THE COMPUTER STORES. ╘HESE SALESMEN MUST BE EXPERTS, RIGHT? ┴FTER
ALL, THEY WORK IN A COMPUTER STORE. ╧F COURSE, LAST YEAR THEY WERE
SELLING ALUMINUM SIDING, BUT THEN WE REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW THAT,
DO WE?
     ╫HAT MOTIVATES PEOPLE TO VOLUNTEER FOR MEMBERSHIP IN THIS
CONSPIRACY. ╫HAT IS THE COMMON UNIFYING BOND THAT LEADS PEOPLE TO
IGNORE, TELL LIES ABOUT, AND ACTUALLY BELIEVE ALL SORTS OF NONSENSE
AND MIS-INFORMATION ABOUT SOME OF THE BEST DAMN COMPUTER HARDWARE IN
THE WORLD. ╙IMPLY PUT, IT IS PRIDE, SELF-INTEREST AND IGNORANCE. ╔
WILL ADRESS EACH OF THESE AREAS, BUT  FIRST WE CAN MAKE A SHORT
COMMENT ON EACH OF THESE SUBJECTS: PRIDE REFUSES TO ADMIT MISTAKES
TO OURSELVES; SELF-INTEREST REFUSES TO ADMIT OUR MISTAKES TO OTHERS;
AND IGNORANCE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW A MISTAKE HAS BEEN MADE.
     ┬EFORE ╔ GET INTO THE MEANING BEHIND THE WEIRD TITLE FOR THIS
ARTICLE, ╔ WANT TO REMIND YOU OF A FEW MYTHS, PROVERBS AND COMMONLY
HELD BELIEFS:  1) ┘OU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR.  2) ╔F YOU BUILD A
BETTER MOUSETRAP, THE WORLD WILL BEAT A PATH TO YOUR DOOR. 3) ╔T
PAYS TO ADVERTIZE. 4) ┘OU CAN FOOL ALL OF THE PEOPLE SOME OF THE
TIME AND SOME OF THE PEOPLE ALL OF THE TIME, BUT YOU CAN'T FOOL ALL
OF THE PEOPLE ALL OF THE TIME. ╦EEP THESE PROVERBS IN MIND AS WE
CONTINUE THROUGH THIS ARTICLE, SINCE ╔ WILL REFER TO THEM LATER.

                       ╘HE ┼MPEROR'S ╬EW ├LOTHES
                       =========================

     ╫E MUST ALSO PROVIDE A LITTLE MORE BACKGROUND. ═OST OF US
REMEMBER THE FAIRYTALE OF THE ┼MPEROR'S ╬EW ├LOTHES. ╞OR THOSE THAT
DON'T, A QUICK SUMMARY IS AS FOLLOWS: ╧NCE UPON A TIME, AN EXTREMELY
VAIN EMPEROR ALWAYS HAD TO HAVE THE BEST OF EVERYTHING, ESPECIALLY
FINE CLOTHING. ┴ VERY SHREWD TAILOR SOLD HIM A TRULY MAGNIFICENT (SO
HE SAID) SUIT OF CLOTHES. ╘HE ONLY CATCH WAS THAT TO ALL BUT THE
TRULY PURE OF HEART, THE CLOTHING WAS INVISIBLE. ╙INCE NOBODY IN THE
EMPIRE WOULD ADMIT TO BEING LESS THAN PURE HEARTED, INCLUDING THE
EMPEROR AND ALL OF HIS COURT, THE EMPEROR WALKED AROUND FEELING ALL
OF THE DRAFTS IN THE CASTLE, WHILE ALL THE COURT RAVED ABOUT THE
BEAUTY OF HIS CLOTHING. ┴LL WAS WELL UNTIL A VERY YOUNG CHILD, OF
UNQUESTIONABLY PURE HEART, ASKED WHY THE EMPEROR WAS BUCK NAKED.
┼VERYONE WAS MORTIFIED, AND ALL THE ADULTS LEARNED A VALUABLE
LESSON. ╧F COURSE, IN REAL LIFE, THE CHILD AND HIS PARENTS WOULD
HAVE BEEN DEPORTED, IF NOT BURNT AT THE STAKE.
      ╘HIS IS A FINE TALE AND GIVES ME A CHANCE TO OFFER A LITTLE
INSIGHT INTO THE CONSPIRACY. ╔ AM GOING TO ENGAGE IN A LITTLE
CHARACTER SUBSTITUTION HERE. ╞OR THE EMPEROR AND HIS COURT,
SUBSTITUTE A TYPICAL ┴PPLE OWNER; FOR THE TAILOR, SUBSTITUTE ┴PPLE
├ORP., AND FOR THE PURE HEARTED CHILD, SUBSTITUTE THE TYPICAL ┴MIGA
OR ├OMMODORE 64/128 OWNER. ╔ HAVE NEVER BEEN HESITANT TO OFFER MY
OPINION ON ┴PPLE COMPUTERS, TO WIT, THAT THERE IS MUCH LESS THERE
THAN MEETS THE EYE WHEN COMPARED TO A SIMILAR ├OMMODORE SYSTEM. ═Y
USUAL METHOD HAS NOT BEEN TO TEAR ┴PPLE PRODUCTS DOWN (WITH THE
EXCEPTION OF MENTIONING THE HIGH COST OF THE ORIGINAL SYSTEM AND THE
CONTINUING COST OF UPGRADING), BUT RATHER ╔ WOULD EXPLAIN THE MANY
ADVANTAGES TO BE HAD IN, ORIGINALLY THE ├64/128, AND NOW THE ┴MIGA.
╔ SELDOM MADE ANY CONVERTS AMOUNG CURRENT ┴PPLE OWNERS AND ╔ MAY
HAVE CAUSED SEVERAL OF THEM TO JOIN THE VOLUNTEER CONSPIRACY MYSELF.
╚OWEVER, IF ╔ COULD CATCH SOMEONE BEFORE THEY HAD HEAVILY INVESTED
IN ANOTHER COMPUTER SYSTEM, THAT PERSON USUALLY ENDED UP AS ANOTHER
HAPPY ├OMMODORE OWNER.
     ╙OME OF THE MOST PERPLEXED PEOPLE OF ALL ARE THE FORMER ┴PPLE
OWNERS WHO NOW ARE ┴MIGA OWNERS. ╘HEY CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHY SO MANY
PEOPLE ARE DOWNRIGHT ANTI-┴MIGA. ╘HEY CAN UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE WERE
DOWN ON ├OMMODORE IN THE BAD OLD PRE-┴MIGA DAYS WHEN THE COMPARISON
WAS BETWEEN THE ├64 AND THE ┴PPLE ╔╔ SERIES. ┼VERYBODY KNOWS THAT
THE ┴PPLE WAS CLEARLY THE SUPERIOR COMPUTER (THAT LAST STATEMENT HAS
FORMER AND PRESENT ├64 OWNERS LAUGHING ALOUD, ╔'M SURE). ╘HESE SAME
FORMER ┴PPLE OWNERS THINK IT IS SOME KIND OF FLUKE AND TOTALLY OUT
OF CHARACTER THAT SUCH A SCHLOCK OUTFIT AS ├OMMODORE WOULD BE THE
ONES TO BRING THE ┴MIGA TO MARKET. ╘O ME, IT IS THE MOST NATURAL
THING IN THE WORLD FOR ├┬═ TO HAVE BEEN THE COMPANY TO RECOGNIZE
WHAT WAS INHERENT IN THE ┴MIGA DESIGN AND TO SNAP IT UP. ╘HE ├64 HAD
THE SAME DESIGN PHILOSOPHY AS THE ┴MIGA. ╘HIS PHILOSOPHY IS TO GIVE
THE USER ALL THE HELP YOU CAN IN THE HARDWARE. ├OMMODORE DOES THIS
BY TAKING THE LOAD OFF THE ├╨╒ BY USING SPECIAL CHIPS FOR SPECIAL
FUNCTIONS. ╘HE ╙╔─ (SOUND) AND ╓╔├ (VIDEO) CHIP IN THE ├64 FOR HIGH
SPEED SOUND AND GRAPHICS IS ECHOED AND EXPANDED IN THE SPECIAL CHIPS
(─ENISE, ┴GNUS & ╨AULA) IN THE ┴MIGA THAT GIVES US OUR SPLENDID 4
CHANNEL STEREO OUTPUT AND 4096 COLORS ON SCREEN. ┴PPLE HAS ALWAYS
RELIED ON SOFTWARE (IN ╥┴═ OR ╥╧═) TO DO THE FANCY STUFF BOTH IN THE
ORIGINAL ┴PPLES AND LATER IN THE ═ACS. ├OMMODORE ALWAYS GIVES YOU
CUSTOM CHIPS TO HANDLE THE STUFF THAT SLOWS DOWN THE OTHER
COMPUTERS.

                               ╧.╨.═.
                               ======

     ╔N HIS BOOK, ╞REE TO ├HOOSE, ╬OBEL ╨RIZE WINNING ECONOMIST
═ILTON ╞RIEDMAN TALKS OF THE WAY THAT MONEY IS SPENT IN SOCIETY. ╚E
SAYS THAT THERE ARE FOUR BASIC WAYS TO SPEND MONEY. ╘HE FIRST WAY,
OR ├ATAGORY ╔, IS FOR YOU TO SPEND YOUR MONEY ON YOURSELF. ╘HIS IS
THE MOST EFFICIENT WAY. ╔T IS USUALLY SPENT JUDICIOUSLY AND WISELY
(AT LEAST IN YOUR OPINION). ┬ARGAINS ARE SEARCHED OUT AND
INVESTIGATED. "┘OU CLEARLY HAVE A STRONG INCENTIVE BOTH TO ECONOMIZE
AND TO GET AS MUCH VALUE AS YOU CAN FOR EACH DOLLAR YOU DO SPEND."
╘HIS IS PROBABLY THE WAY THAT MOST OF US PURCHASED OUR ├OMMODORE
EQUIPMENT.
     ╘HE SECOND WAY, OR ├ATAOGORY ╔╔, IS TO SPEND YOUR MONEY ON
SOMEONE ELSE. ╞OR INSTANCE, WHEN YOU PURCHASE ├HRISTMAS GIFTS OR
BIRTHDAY PRESENTS. "┘OU HAVE THE SAME INCENTIVE TO ECONOMIZE AS IN
├ATAGORY ╔ BUT NOT THE SAME INCENTIVE TO GET FULL VALUE FOR YOUR
MONEY..." ┘OU DON'T WANT TO BE THOUGHT CHEAP, SO YOU MIGHT SPEND A
LITTLE MORE THAN IS REQUIRED.
     ╔N ├ATAGORY ╔╔╔ SPENDING, YOU ARE SPENDING SOMEONE ELSES MONEY
ON YOURSELF.  ┴N EXAMPLE WOULD BE LUNCHING ON AN EXPENSE ACCOUNT.
"┘OU HAVE NO STRONG INCENTIVE TO KEEP DOWN THE COST OF THE LUNCH,
BUT YOU DO HAVE A STRONG INCENTIVE TO GET YOUR MONEY'S WORTH."
┴NOTHER CASE WOULD BE TO SUPPOSE THAT YOUR BOSS TOLD YOU TO PURCHASE
WHATEVER COMPUTER SYSTEM YOU NEEDED FOR YOU TO GET THE JOB DONE.
     ├ATAGORY ╔╓ SPENDING REFERS TO YOU SPENDING OTHER PEOPLES MONEY
(╧.╨.═.) ON OTHER PEOPLE. ╞OR INSTANCE, YOU ARE PAYING FOR SOMEONE
ELSES LUNCH OUT OF AN EXPENSES ACCOUNT. "┘OU HAVE LITTLE INCENTIVE
EITHER TO ECONOMIZE OR TO TRY TO GET YOUR GUEST THE LUNCH THAT HE
WILL VALUE MOST HIGHLY." ╧R SUPPOSE AGAIN THAT YOUR BOSS TOLD YOU TO
PURCHASE A COMPUTER SYSTEM FOR ╞RED, SO THAT HE CAN GET THE JOB
DONE. ╫ELL, IF ╞RED SCREWS UP, YOU CAN ALWAYS SAY THAT IT'S NOT YOUR
FAULT; YOU GOT ╞RED THE BEST COMPUTER THAT MONEY COULD BUY. ╘HERE IS
A SAYING IN BUSINESS CIRCLES THAT NO ONE WAS EVER FIRED FOR BUYING
╔.┬.═.
     ├ATAGORY ╔╔╔ & ╔╓ SPENDING IS THE LEAST EFFICIENT AND MOST
WASTEFUL WAY TO SPEND MONEY. ╔T IS ALSO THE WAY THAT SPENDING IS
DONE IN A BUREAUCRACY. ═Y OWN, PERSONAL, FAVORITE BUREAUCRACIES ARE
GOVERNMENTS AND THE PURCHASING DEPARTMENTS OF MEDIUM TO BIG
BUSINESS. ╙MALL BUSINESSES ARE USUALLY MORE OWNER CONTROLLED AND
THEIR SPENDING PATTERNS ARE CLOSER TO ├ATAGORY ╔ & ╔╔. ╔T IS
PROBABLY NOT A COINCIDENCE THAT MANY SMALL BUSINESSES AND
INDIVIDUALS USE ├OMMODORE EQUIPMENT AND THE BIG BOYS USE THE MORE
EXPENSIVE COMPUTER PRODUCTS. ╔T IS THIS TYPE OF THINKING THAT GETS
US $ 600.00 TOILET SEATS ON SUBMARINES.

                          ╘HE ╙PICE ╘RADE
                          ===============

     ┴DVERTISING IS THE SPICE OF BUSINESS. ╘O TRY TO MARKET A
PRODUCT WITHOUT PROPER ADVERTISING IS LIKE EATING UNSEASONED FOOD.
╔T IS NOURISHING, PERHAPS, BUT NOTHING TO BOAST ABOUT. ╠IKE SPICE,
ADVERTISING BRINGS OUT THE FINE POINTS OF A PRODUCT AND HIGHLIGHTS
AND CALLS ATTENTION TO THINGS ABOUT A PRODUCT THAT WE MIGHT
OTHERWISE MISS. ├OMMODORE HAS TAKEN MUCH CRITICISM FROM ITS FANS
(AND WE ARE LEGION) DUE TO THE LACK OF ADVERTISING BY THE COMPANY. ╔
THINK THE ENTIRE COMPANY HAS BEEN LABORING UNDER THE HUBRIS OF MYTH
# 2 ABOVE AND COMPLETELY IGNORING PROVERB # 3. ┘OU MIGHT HAVE THE
WORLDS BEST MOUSETRAP BUT YOU REALLY SHOULD PAY FOR A LITTLE
ADVERTISING TO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT IT. ┴ND MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT,
├┬═ REALLY DOES HAVE THE BEST MOUSETRAP!
     ╔.┬.═. AND ┴PPLE ARE OFTEN CALLED MARKETING COMPANIES WHOSE
PRODUCTS HAPPEN TO BE COMPUTERS, RATHER THAN COMPUTER COMPANIES.
╘HEY HAVE TAKEN THOROUGHLY ADEQUATE PRODUCTS AND MARKETED THEM AT
PREMIUM PRICES BY USING A LOT OF MYTH # 1 AND PROVERB # 4 ABOVE.
╨EOPLE REALLY BELIEVE THAT YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR AND THAT HIGH
PRICES MEANS HIGH QUALITY. ├ONVERSLY, LOW PRICES MEANS LOW QUALITY.
╔N THIS PARTICULAR SITUATION, THE LOW PRICES PROBABLY REPRESENT A
REASONABLE MARK-UP ON THE COST OF GOODS SOLD (THE ATTITUDE OF A
MANUFACTURING COMPANY SUCH AS ├OMMODORE) AND THE HIGH PRICES
REPRESENT THE ATTITUDE OF GETTING AS MUCH AS THE MARKET WILL BEAR
(THE ATTITUDE OF ALL COSMETIC COMPANIES AND CERTAIN COMPUTER
COMPANIES).
     ├OMMODORE HAS ALWAYS SAID THAT THEY ARE IN THE BUSINESS OF
SELLING GREAT HARDWARE. ╘HEY DID NOT WORRY ABOUT THINGS LIKE
CUSTOMER SUPPORT AND THE ACTUAL USES THAT PEOPLE HAD FOR THE
HARDWARE. ╘HAT WAS A SOFTWARE PROBLEM. ╞OR MANY OF US, THIS WAS A
SATISFACTORY ANSWER. ╔ DID NOT NEED MUCH SUPPORT AND HAND HOLDING
FROM ├OMMODORE. ╔ JOINED A USERS GROUP AND ╔ KNOW HOW TO READ
INSTRUCTION MANUALS AND FIGURE THINGS OUT FOR MYSELF. ╔ BECAME A
COMPUTER GURU. ╘HE MORE ╔ LEARNED, THE MORE IT BECAME APPARENT THAT
├OMMODORE MADE THE SUPERIOR MACHINES, AT LEAST FOR THE FUN THINGS ╔
WANTED TO DO. ═ANY PEOPLE NEEDED MORE HELP AND COMPLAINED ABOUT
├OMMODORE'S LACK OF SUPPORT, OFTEN COMPARING THEM UNFAVORABLY TO THE
ALLEDGED HIGH LEVEL OF SUPPORT OFFERED BY ┴PPLE AND ╔┬═ ON THEIR
PRODUCTS. ╔ ASKED WHY THEY DIDN'T BUY THOSE OTHER MACHINES. "┬UT
THEY COST TWICE AS MUCH", THEY SAID. ╫ELL, SEZ ╔, SOMEBODY HAS TO
PAY FOR ALL THIS EXTRA HAND HOLDING YOU ARE REQUESTING. ╧F COURSE
THE FINAL IRONY IS THAT THE LEVEL OF SUPPORT OFFERED BY ┴PPLE AND
╔┬═ WAS OFTEN MORE HYPE THAN SUBSTANCE. ┘OU CAN TALK THIS OVER WITH
EARLY ═┴├ OWNERS ABOUT THE FIRST MEMORY UPGRADE OFFERED BY ┴PPLE AND
ALSO WITH THE ORPHAN OWNERS OF ┴PPLE ╔╔╔S AND ╠╔╙┴S AND ╨├ JRS.
     ╫ITH THE EXCEPTION OF MAKING COMPUTERS, ┴PPLE AND ╔.┬.═. DO
MOST THINGS BETTER THAN ├OMMODORE. ╞OR INSTANCE, ╔ READ WIDELY IN
THE COMPUTER FIELD, AND ╔ CAN'T RECALL EVER HEARING ANYBODY FROM
┴PPLE OR ╔┬═ SAYING ANYTHING AT ALL ABOUT ├OMMODORE. ╬OTHING GOOD
AND NOTHING BAD, JUST NOTHING AT ALL; AS IF THEY DIDN'T EVEN EXIST.
╔ MEAN, THAT IS REALLY AN EXCELLENT STRATEGY. ╬ONE OF ┴PPLE'S OR
╔┬═'S CUSTOMERS OR POTENTIAL CUSTOMERS WILL EVER LEARN FROM ┴PPLE OR
╔┬═ THAT ┴MIGA EXISTS. ┴PPLE DOES ACKNOWLEDGE ╔┬═, BUT ╔┬═ BARELY
ACKNOWLEDGES ┴PPLE. ┴PPLE WAS AT THEIR BEST IN THE LOOK AND FEEL
SUIT WITH ═ICROSOFT AND ╚EWLETT-╨ACKARD. ═OST ┴MIGA PARTISANS
THOUGHT THAT ┴PPLE DIDN'T INCLUDE ├OMMODORE IN THE LAWSUIT BECAUSE
OUR ╫ORKBENCH INTERFACE WAS SUFFICIENTLY DIFFERENT FROM ┴PPLE'S AND
THAT WE WERE THEREFORE SAFE. ╘HE REASON THAT ┴PPLE DID NOT INCLUDE
├┬═ WAS THAT IF THEY WERE INCLUDED IN THE SUIT, A LOT OF PEOPLE
WOULD LEARN ABOUT ├┬═ AND BEGIN MAKING COMPARISONS THAT ┴PPLE CAN
LITTLE AFFORD IN THE AREAS OF EITHER PRICE OR PERFORMANCE. ╔N ANY
EVENT, MOST PEOPLE CONSIDER THAT SUIT NOTHING BUT A DELAYING TACTIC
THAT WAS REALLY AIMED AT ╔┬═ AND THEIR ╨RESENTATION ═ANAGER. ╔T IS
WITH THOROUGH DELIGHT THAT WE CAN NOW WITNESS A TRUE CASE OF SOMEONE
GETTING THEIR JUST DESSERTS IN THE SUIT OF ╪EROX AGAINST ┴PPLE ON
THE "LOOK AND FEEL" ISSUE. ┴PPLE ATTORNEYS CAN HAVE THE SOMEWHAT
STRANGE EXPERIENCE OF ARGUING THAT ╚EWLITT-╨ACKARD AND ═ICROSOFT
STOLE THE "COPYRIGHTED" ═AC╔NTOSH LOOK AND FEEL IN ONE COURTROOM,
AND THEN RUNNING DOWN THE HALL TO THE ╪EROX COURTROOM TO ARGUE THAT
LOOK & FEEL IS NOT COPYRIGHTABLE. ┬UT ╚EY, IT'S ╧╦, LAWYERS ARE
TRAINED TO DO THIS KIND OF LOGICAL AND MORAL GYMNASTICS, OR AS WAS
SAID BY THE ├HESHIRE ├AT IN ┴LICE IN ╫ONDERLAND, "..TO BELIEVE TWO
IMPOSSIBLE THINGS BEFORE BREAKFAST".
     ┴ FINAL NOTE ON THE SPICE TRADE. ╘OO MUCH OF A GOOD THING IS
NOT GOOD. ╙PICE TRADE FLOURISHED IN THE MIDDLE AGES AND THE PRIMARY
PURPOSE OF SPICES WAS TO DISGUISE THE TASTE OF MEAT GOING BAD DUE TO
THE LACK OF REFRIGERATION. ╫E ALL APPRECIATE THAT ├┬═ HAS STARTED TO
ADVERTISE. ╫E CAN ONLY HOPE THAT LIKE A GOOD SEASONING, IT IS
APPLIED IN AN APPROPRIATE MANNER AND IN THE PROPER PROPORTIONS.




                                ─EALER ╙UPPORT
                                ==============

    ╫HY DO DEALERS JOIN THE CONSPIRACY?  ┘OU WOULD THINK THAT A
DEALER WOULD WANT TO CARRY THE BEST COMPUTER HE COULD GET HIS HANDS
ON. ╘HERE ARE A NUMBER OF CONSIDERATIONS HERE. ╧LD TIME DEALERS WILL
TELL YOU THAT BEING A ├OMMODORE DEALER HAS HISTORICALLY BEEN A
THANKLESS JOB. ├┬═ BASICALLY ABANDONED THE ╒╙┴ (BUT NOT ├ANADIAN)
PERSONAL COMPUTER MARKET TO ┴PPLE IN THE LATE 70S. ┴T THAT TIME, THE
├OMMODORE ╨┼╘ WAS MARKETED AS A BUSINESS COMPUTER AND THE ┴PPLE WAS
REGARDED AS THE HOBBY MARKET TOY. ┴LL THOSE CRAZY LITTLE GRAPHIC
SYMBOLS ON THE FRONT OF THE ╨┼╘ KEYBOARD KEYS (AND LATER THE ╓╔├-20
AND THE ├64) WERE CALLED BUSINESS GRAPHICS AND WERE INTENDED TO BE
USEFUL IN THE DESIGN OF BUSINESS FORMS. ├┬═ NEGLECTED THE ╒╙┴ MARKET
AND BUILT A VERY RESPECTABLE FOLLOWING IN THE REST OF THE WORLD. ├┬═
DIDN'T WORRY ABOUT, AND DIDN'T OFFER TO MUCH SUPPORT TO IT'S DEALER
BASE HERE IN THE ╒╙┴.
     ╔N THE EARLY 80S, WHEN ├┬═ CAME BACK TO THE ╒╙┴, WITH FIRST THE
╓╔├-20 AND THEN THE ├64, IT HAD VERY LITTLE IN THE WAY OF A DEALER
BASE BUILT UP. ╫ITHOUT ENOUGH DEALERS SHOWING IT'S PRODUCTS, IT
COULDN'T SELL THEM. ┴LSO MANY DEALERS REFUSED TO CARRY THEM,
PRIMARILY BECAUSE THEY WERE PRICED TOO LOW. ├┬═ DECIDED TO MASS
MARKET THE ╓╔├-20 AND THEN THE ├64 AND THIS ALSO MADE THE DEALERS
MAD. ╘HAT'S WHEN THE ├64 FIRST BEGAN GETTING THE NAME AS A TOY
COMPUTER. ╧THER COMPUTER DEALERS SAID THE ├64 WAS A TOY, CERTAINLY
NOT BASED ON IT'S POWER, BUT BECAUSE IT WAS SOLD IN TOY STORES. ╘HE
├64 WAS NOT AND IS NOT A TOY COMPUTER. ═ANY OF THE THINGS IT CAN DO
RIGHT OUT OF THE BOX REQUIRE COSTLY ADD-ON BOARDS FOR OTHER
COMPUTERS. ╒NFORTUNATELY, OTHER COMPUTER DEALERS ARE LABELING THE
┴MIGA AS A TOY COMPUTER, PRIMARILY BECAUSE IT HAS SUCH GREAT GAME
SOFTWARE.
   ╘HE REASON OTHER COMPUTER DEALERS ARE WILLING TO TELL LIES ABOUT
├OMMODORE EQUIPMENT IS BASED ON SIMPLE SELF INTEREST. ├OMPUTER
DEALERS (AND ALL OTHER RETAIL MERCHANTS) MAKE THEIR MONEY FROM A
MARK-UP ON THE PRICE OF THE EQUIPMENT AND SOFTWARE THEY SELL.
─EALERS CAN USUALLY BUY AT WHOLESALE PRICE DISCOUNTS OF AROUND 40%
OFF OF LIST PRICE. ╞OR INSTANCE, ON A  $ 1,000.00 ITEM, THEY CAN BUY
IT FOR $ 600.00 AND THEN SELL IT TO YOU AT A 10% DISCOUNT AND STILL
MAKE $ 300.00. ╧UT OF THIS, THEY HAVE TO PAY THE COSTS OF RUNNING
THEIR BUSINESS, SUCH AS RENT, UTILITIES, EMPLOYEE WAGES AND BENEFITS
AND FINALLY THEIR OWN PROFIT.
     ╔F YOU WERE A DEALER, WOULD YOU WANT TO SELL A COMPUTER SYSTEM
THAT COSTS $ 2,000.00, OR ONE THAT COSTS $ 4000.00. ┬EAR IN MIND
THAT YOUR CUSTOMER PROBABLY DOESN'T KNOW DIDDLY-SQUAT ABOUT WHAT HE
OR SHE IS BUYING AND IS RELYING ON YOUR GOOD JUDGEMENT AND
PROFESSIONAL ETHICS. ═ORE THAN LIKELY YOUR CUSTOMER CAN AFFORD
EITHER SYSTEM AND YOU ARE THEREFORE NOT STEALING FOOD OUT OF THEIR
CHILDREN'S MOUTHS BY PUSHING THE MORE EXPENSIVE SYSTEM. ┼VEN BETTER,
SUPPOSE THE CUSTOMER IS A BUSINESS WITH MONEY TO WASTE ON THREE
MARTINI LUNCHES AND EXECUTIVE JUNKETS TO THE BAHAMAS. ╫HAT DO YOU DO
IF THE $ 2,000.00 SYSTEM IS CLEARLY SUPERIOR TO THE $ 4,000.00
SYSTEM. ╧H, MY ACHING ETHICS. ╫HAT DO YOU DO? ┘OU DON'T CARRY THE
$ 2,000.00 SYSTEM IN THE STORE. ┘OU DON'T MENTION IT'S NAME IN THE
SAME SENTENCE OR PARAGRAPH AS YOUR PRODUCT. ┘OU BELIEVE EVERY LIE
AND FABRICATION ABOUT THE LESS EXPENSIVE SYSTEM SO THAT YOU CAN KEEP
A STRAIGHT FACE AND A CLEAR CONSCIENCE WHEN YOU REPEAT THESE LIES TO
YOUR CUSTOMERS WHEN THEY ASK ABOUT THE CAPABILITIES OF THE CHEAPER
MACHINE. ─O YOU REALLY WANT TO GO BACK TO SELLING ALUMINUM SIDING?
     ╫HAT DO YOU DO IF YOU ARE THE EDITOR OR PUBLISHER OF A
SUPPOSEDLY GENERAL INTEREST COMPUTER MAGAZINE THAT RELIES FOR MOST
OF IT'S INCOME FROM THE SALES OF ADVERTISEMENTS FOR ╔┬═ OR ┴PPLE
HARDWARE ADD ONS OR SOFTWARE? ┘OU PRETEND THAT THE FIRST PERSONAL
COMPUTER THAT WASN'T A KIT WAS THE ┴PPLE (ACTUALLY THE ├OMMODORE ╨┼╘
2001 WAS OUT ABOUT 4 MONTHS EARLIER). ┘OU PRETEND THAT ├OMMODORE IS
NOT A REAL COMPUTER COMPANY AND WILL NOT BE ABLE TO PROVIDE SUPPORT
FOR IT'S PRODUCTS. ┘OU PRETEND THAT ┴MIGA MULTI-TASKING CAN'T BE
REAL MULTI-TASKING OR ELSE MULTI-TASKING IS NOT REQUIRED BY POWER
USERS. ┘OU NEVER MENTION THE ┴MIGA AT ALL OR GLOSS OVER IT, EVEN
WHEN DOING A FEATURE SPREAD ON SUCH SUBJECTS AS DESKTOP VIDEO,
MULTI-TASKING, GAMES, OR OTHER AREAS WHERE THE ┴MIGA REALLY SHINES.
┘OU BUY AN ┴MIGA FOR YOUR OWN USE BUT KEEP IT IN A LOCKED ROOM AT
HOME.
     ╚AVE YOU EVER NOTICED THAT THE SAME SOFTWARE PRODUCT IS USUALLY
$ 10.00 TO $ 20.00 CHEAPER FOR THE ├OMMODORE MACHINE THAN IT IS FOR
THE ┴PPLE OR ╔┬═ MARKET. ╫HY IS THIS? ╔S IT BECAUSE IT IS EASIER TO
WRITE THE PROGRAMS FOR THE ├OMMODORE AND HARDER TO WRITE THE CODE
FOR ┴PPLE AND ╔┬═ AND THE SOFTWARE PUBLISHER IS PASSING THE COST
SAVINGS ON TO US. ┘EAH, RIGHT! ╔S IT BECAUSE THEY KNOW THAT ┴PPLE
AND ╔┬═ OWNERS ARE USED TO PAYING MORE FOR THEIR "QUALITY" PRODUCTS
AND PRICE IS NO OBJECT? ╔'M SURE THEY WOULD NOT PHRASE IT THAT WAY.
╘HEY WOULD PROBABLY SAY SOMETHING LIKE THEY HAVE TO MAKE IT CHEAP
ENOUGH FOR THE ├OMMODORE OWNERS SO THEY WOULD NOT PIRATE IT. ╘HAT'S
PRETTY INSULTING TO ├OMMODORE USERS. ┬UT THEN AGAIN, THE ALTERNATIVE
IS TO SAY THAT ┴PPLE & ╔┬═ OWNERS ARE USED TO GETTING RIPPED OFF,
WHICH IS ALSO PRETTY INSULTING. ╘HEY PROBABLY JUST SUPPOSE THAT
┴PPLE AND ╔┬═ OWNERS ARE JUST A LITTLE LOOSER WITH A BUCK THAN THE
"REST OF US".

                         ├OMBATING THE ├ONSPIRACY
                         ========================

     ╚OW DO WE FIGHT THIS CONSPIRACY? ┴S LOYAL ├OMMODORE AND ┴MIGA
USERS WE CAN KEEP THE FAITH. ├ORRECT ERRORS, LIES AND MISINFORMATION
WHEN YOU HEAR IT REPEATED, ESPECIALLY IN MAGAZINES AND IN THE
WORKPLACE. ╘ELL YOUR FRIENDS AND RELATIONS ABOUT WHAT YOU CAN DO
WITH YOUR MACHINE. ╘ELL YOUR BOSS! ┴S AN ┴MIGA USER, YOU ARE
PROBABLY CONSIDERABLY MORE COMPUTER LITERATE THAN THE AVERAGE
COMPUTER USER. ╔ MEAN, AFTER ALL, BEFORE YOU COULD BUY IT YOU HAD TO
FIRST UNEARTH THE MACHINE FROM A CONFUSING HEAP OF LIES,
MIS-INFORMATION AND OTHER SMOKE AND MIRRORS PUT OUT BY THE
COMPETITIORS. ╘ALK ABOUT MONEY. ╘ALK ABOUT GETTING MORE FOR IT AND
THE RESPONSIBILITY TO SPEND IT WISELY. ╨RETEND YOU ARE IN A SPENDING
CATAGORY ╔ OR ╔╔ SITUATION EVEN IF IT IS SOMEONE ELSE'S MONEY.
─EMONSTRATE YOUR ┴MIGA. ╘HE MACHINE SELLS ITSELF. ╔T HAS ALMOST HAD
TO SELL ITSELF FOR THE PAST FOUR YEARS. ╔N MANY RESPECTS, WE ARE AT
A DISADVANTAGE SINCE WE ARE TRYING TO CHANGE OPINION USING NOTHING
BUT HARD FACTS. ╧PINIONS ARE RARELY BASED ON FACTS.
     ─O NOT ANTAGONIZE OWNERS OF OTHER BRANDS BY BEING PATRONIZING,
SARCASTIC OR PITYING WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT THE "GREAT" THINGS THEY
CAN DO WITH THEIR COMPUTER (THIS IS VERY HARD TO DO). ╙HOW AN
INTEREST IN THE PROJECT THEY ARE TRYING TO USE THE COMPUTER FOR AND
JUST CASUALLY (WITHOUT BRAGGING) EXPLAIN HOW THE ┴MIGA HANDLES THE
SAME CHORE. ╔T WON'T BE LONG BEFORE THEY START ASKING FOR MORE
INFORMTION ABOUT THE ┴MIGA. ╔T IS POSSIBLE TO CONVERT PEOPLE AWAY
FROM THE VOLUNTEER CONSPIRACY BY ERASING THEIR IGNORANCE ABOUT
┴MIGAS. ┴TTACKING PRIDE AND SELF INTEREST NEVER WORKS AND ACTUALLY
PROBABLY ACHIEVES THE OPPOSITE EFFECT.
      ╞INALLY, ├OMMODORE SHOULD WORK ON THEIR MARKETING. ╘HEY SHOULD
ALSO PROBABLY RAISE THE PRICE ON THE ┴MIGA 2000 AND ABOVE SYSTEMS. ╔
WOULD SUGGEST RAISING THE PRICE BY $ 1,500.00 AND THEN FLOODING THE
WORLD WITH $ 900.00 OFF COUPONS AND DISCOUNTS. ╙TRANGELY ENOUGH,
WHEN PEOPLE ARE COMPARING COMPUTER SYSTEMS THEY TEND TO FIRST GROUP
COMPUTER SYSTEMS BASED ON LIST PRICE. ╘HEY FIND IT HARD TO BELIEVE
THAT THE BETTER COMPUTER CAN BE FOUND IN A LOWER PRICE BRACKET. ╘HEY
ASSUME THAT YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR AND THE MORE YOU PAY, THE MORE
YOU GET. ╥ATHER THAN COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW STUPID THIS IS, JUST
CHARGE MORE FOR THE COMPUTER. ╘HE EXTRA MONEY COULD FINANCE EVEN
MORE ADVERTISING. ╚OPEFULLY, WE WILL EVENTUALLY GET TO THE POINT
WHERE CAN BRAG ABOUT HOW SMART WE WERE FOR OWNING AN ┴MIGA BEFORE
EVERYONE ELSE DID, INSTEAD OF HAVING TO EXPLAIN WHAT AN ┴MIGA IS !

╘HIS ARTICLE IS COPYRIGHTED, 1990, BY ╩OSEPH ╩. ╙HAUGHNESSY, ╨.┼.

╨ERMISSION IS HEREBY GIVEN TO POST THIS TO
ANY AND ALL ELECTRONIC ┬┬╙ SYSTEMS.

╨ERMISSION IS NOT GIVEN FOR WRITTEN PUBLICATION OR SALE OF THIS
ARTICLE WITHOUT THE EXPRESS WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE AUTHOR.

╘HE ABOVE ARTICLE IS PRIMARILY PERSONAL OPINION BASED ON YEARS OF
OBSERVATION OF, READING ABOUT, AND PARTICIPATION IN COMPUTER USAGE.
╘HE AUTHOR HAS USED MANY DIFFERENT BRANDS OF COMPUTER, INCLUDING ╔┬═
AND ┴PPLE, BUT WHEN HE HAS TO SPEND HIS OWN MONEY HE GOES ├OMMODORE.

╩OE ╙HAUGHNESSY CAN BE REACHED ON ╨╠╔╬╦, ╤-╠╔╬╦ AND ╟┼╬╔┼ AS ╙┼╥┼╬─╔╨