Stars of Shareware: Windows Spiele/SOS-WIN_SPIELE.ISO/programm/knobel/crypto13/crypto.qot

Text File | 1994-02-06 | 137KB | 1,344 lines

I will never apologize for the United States of America, ever. I don't care what the facts are.    George Bush
It's better to keep your mouth closed and be presumed a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
If you do not raise your eyes you will think you are the highest point.    Antonio Porchia
Thinking about what you can't control only wastes energy and creates its own enemy.    Worf
Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow.    Matthew Browne
All the wastes in a year from a nuclear power plant can be stored under a desk.    Ronald Reagan
Now comes the mystery.    Henry Ward Beecher
Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend - or a meaningful day.    the 14th Dalai Lama
Genius is the ability to reduce the complicated to the simple.
I am responsible only to God and history.    Francisco Franco
If you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.    Motto of the Green Berets
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most times he will pick himself up and carry on.    Winston Churchill
You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.    James Thurber
What does not destroy me, makes me strong.    Friedrich Nietzsche
In politics stupidity is not a handicap.    Napoleon
A winner isn't nearly as afraid of losing as a loser is secretly afraid of winning.
We have met the enemy and he is us.    Walt Kelly in "POGO"
Irony is when you buy a suit with two pair of pants, and then burn a hole in the coat.
If I had any humility I would be perfect.    Ted Turner
Republicans employ exterminators. Democrats step on the bugs.
An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.    Laurence J. Peter
Reading made Don Quixote a gentleman, but believing what he read made him mad.    George Bernard Shaw
A quick response is worth a thousand logical responses.    Merle P. Martin
This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but a whimper.    T. S. Eliot
The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance.    Socrates
A picture is a poem without words.    Horace
Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.    Sam Brown
The American people will judge me on what I am saying.    J. Danforth Quayle
It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.    Tallulah Bankhead
A satirist is a man who discovers unpleasant things about himself and then says them about other people.    Peter McArthur
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.    Mark Twain
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.    Robert Frost
In every hierarchy, whether it be government or business, each employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence; every post tends to be filled by an employee incompetent to execute its duties.    Laurance J. Peter
What broke in a man when he could bring himself to kill another?    Alan Paton
Please don't ask me what the score is, I'm not even sure what the game is.    Ashleigh Brilliant
A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.    Robert Frost
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.    Phyllis Diller
If you want a thing well one, do it yourself.    Charles Haddon Spurgeon
There are a million ways to lose a work day, but not even a single way to get one back.    Tom DeMarco and Timothy Lister
If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it.    Herodotus
It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better ... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.    Woody Allen
I think that people want peace so much that one of these days government had better get out of their way and let them have it.    Dwight D. Eisenhower
Lesser artists borrow, great artists steal.    Igor Stravinsky
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.    George S. Patton
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.    Gen. George S. Patton
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.    Albert Einstein
Children begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them; sometimes they forgive them.    Oscar Wilde
Ninety per cent of everything is crap.    Theodore Sturgeon
Maternity pay? Now every Tom, Dick and Harry will get pregnant.    Malcolm Smith
Never trust anyone over thirty.    Jerry Rubin
All the taxes paid over a lifetime by the average American are spent by the government in less than a second.    Jim Fiebig
Against stupidity, even the gods themselves contend in vain.    Isaac Azimov
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.    Franklin D. Roosevelt
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.    Woody Allen
I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages.    William H. Mauldin
There is no conclusive evidence of life after death. But there is no evidence of any sort against it. Soon enough you will know. So why fret about it?    Lazarus Long
Gaiety is the most outstanding feature of the Soviet Union.    Joseph Stalin
The successful revolutionary is a statesman, the unsuccessful one a criminal.    Erich Fromm
Man in the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass-produced with unskilled labor.    Werner von Braun
Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash.    Winston Churchill
Figures won't lie, but liars will figure.    Charles H. Grosvenor
God may be subtle. But He is not malicious.    Albert Einstein
What is life? An illusion, a shadow, a story. And the greatest good is little enough: for all life is a dream, and dreams themselves are only dreams.    Pedro Calderon de la Barca
The function of genius is not to give new answers, but to pose new questions - which time and mediocrity can solve.    Hugh Trevor-Roper
After large expenditures of federal, state, and county funds; after much confusion generated by detours and road blocks; after greatly annoying the surrounding population with noise, dust, and fumes, the previously existing traffic jam is relocated by one half-mile.    Alan Deitz
I like the silent church before the service begins, better than any preaching.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
Every time you come up with a terrific idea, you find that someone else thought of it first.    Frank Harden
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.    Tom Stoppard
No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman.    Honore de Balzac
I never trust a man unless I've got his pecker in my pocket.    Lyndon B. Johnson
The correct way to punctuate a sentence that starts: "Of course it is none of my business but ... " is to place a period after the word "but." Don't use excessive force in supplying such moron with a period. Cutting his throat is only a momentary pleasure and is bound to get you talked about.    Lazarus Long
You will need three umbrellas: one to leave at the office, one to leave at home home, and one to leave on the train.    James L. Blankenship
I've got to be careful I don't overcheerlead on this economy.    George Bush
Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.    Confucius
Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win.    Jonathan Kozol
The waste from one nuclear power plant in a year would take less storage space than a dining room table.    Ronald Reagan
Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical infants. If we continue to develop our technology without wisdom or prudence, our servant may prove to be our executioner.    General Omar Bradley
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem: they know how it's done, they've seen it done every day, but they're unable to do it themselves.    Brendan Behan
In war there is no substitute for victory.    General Douglas MacArthur
There really is no substitute for holding the reins.    Jean-Luc Picard
Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.    Laurence Coughlin
Conscious is when you are aware of something and conscience is when you wish you weren't.
No man's life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session.
Love is only the dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.    W. Somerset Maugham
Research is reading two books that have never been read in order to write a third that will never be read.
Man is the only creature endowed with the power of laughter; is he not the only one that deserves to be laughed at?    Greville
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.    Oscar Wilde
The truest wild beasts live in the most populous places.    Baltasar Gracian
All general statements are false.    R. H. Grenier
Each friend represents a world in us, a world not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.    Anais Nin
To kind of suddenly try to get my hair colored, and dance up and down in a miniskirt or do something, you know, show that I've got a lot of jazz out there and drop a bunch of one-liners, I'm running for president of the United States... I kind of think I'm a scintillating kind of fellow.    George Bush
All things are only transitory.    Goethe
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.    Mark Twain
A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.    Joseph Stalin
I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people.    J. Danforth Quayle
Anyone who can walk to the welfare office can walk to work.    Al Capp
All snakes who wish to remain in Ireland will please raise their right hands.    Saint Patrick
To err is human but to really foul things up requires a computer.    Paul Ehrlich
From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs.    Karl Marx
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.    Robert F. Kennedy
Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.    Abraham Lincoln
The persons hardest to convince they're at the retirement age are children at bedtime.    Shannon Fife
You are certainly entitled to your opinion. Fortunately, the rest of us are entitled to ignore it.
A little more moderation would be good. Of course, my life hasn't exactly been one of moderation.    Donald Trump
The purpose of computing is insight, not numbers.    R. W. Hamming
Everybody is interesting for an hour, but few people can last more than two.    V. S. Naipul
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.    H. L. Mencken
One friend in a lifetime is much; two are many; three are hardly possible.    Henry B. Adams
The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun.    R. Buckminster Fuller
Time is the only critic without ambition.    John Steinbeck
We should develop anti-satellite weapons because we could not have prevailed without them in "Red Storm Rising".    J. Danforth Quayle
Republicans consume three-fourths of the rutabaga produced in this country. The remainder is thrown out.
There is nothing in this world constant but inconstancy.    Swift
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.    William James
Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.    Ambrose Bierce
Winning is not everything. It's the only thing.    Vince Lombardi
There is always something to upset the most careful of human calculations.    Ihara Saikaku
The news is the one thing the networks can point to with pride. Everything else they do is crap - and they know it.    Fred Friendly
Before you kill something make sure you have something better to replace it with; something better than political opportunist slamming hate horseshit in the public park.    Charles Bukowski
There ain't no such thing as a free lunch.    Robert Heinlein
Men fear thought as they fear nothing else on earth - more than ruin, more even than death.    Bertrand Russell
You can get much farther with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.    Al Capone
If you don't go to other men's funerals they won't go to yours.    Clarence Day
To different minds, the same world is a hell, and a heaven.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
Only the sinner has the right to preach.    Christopher Morley
The great masses of the people ... will more easily fall victims to a big lie than to a small one.    Adolf Hitler
We've sent a man to the moon, and that's 29,000 miles away. The center of the Earth is only 4,000 miles away. You could drive that in a week, but for some reason nobody's ever done it.    Andy Rooney
It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can keep him from lynching me, and I think that's pretty important.    Martin Luther King
Our lifetime may be the last that will be lived out in a technological society.    Isaac Asimov
I passionately hate the idea of being with it, I think an artist has always to be out of step with his time.    Orson Welles
Flair is what marks the difference between artistry and mere competence.    William Riker
We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world.    J. Danforth Quayle
The dictatorship of the Communist Party is maintained by recourse to every form of violence.    Leon Trotsky
You can outdistance that which is running after you, but not what is running inside you.    Rwandan proverb
The optimist thinks that this is the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist knows it.    J. Robert Oppenheimer
Slang is a language that rolls up its sleeves, spits on its hands and goes to work.    Carl Sandburg
I have found little that is good about human beings. In my experience most of them, on the whole, are trash.    Sigmund Freud
As a mother, I know that homosexuals cannot biologically reproduce children; therefore, they must recruit our children.    Anita Bryant
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.    Bertrand Russell
How we deal with death is at least as important as how we deal with life wouldn't you say?    James T. Kirk
A new scientific truth does not triumph by convincing its opponents, but rather because its opponents die, and a new generation grows up that is familiar with it.    Max Planck
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.    Victor Borge
Be careful who you step on on the way up; you never know who you'll pass on the way down.
A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.    Dean Acheson
Good politics are often inextricably intertwined.    Morris Udall
Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.    Ambrose Bierce
There is no substitute for hard work.    Thomas Alva Edison
Conservative, n: a statesman who is enamoured of existing evils, as distinguished from a Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.    Ambrose Bierce
Hawaii is a unique state. It is a state that is by itself... It is different than the other 49 states. Well all states are different, but it's got a particularly unique situation.    J. Danforth Quayle
Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing -- and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.    Will Rogers
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.    Abraham Lincoln
Well, I learned a lot... I went down [to Latin America] to find out from them and [learn] their views. You'd be surprised. They're all individual countries.    Ronald Reagan
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.    Will Rogers
Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him.    John Barrymore
It's not reality that's important, but how you perceive things.
You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.    Eric Hoffer
I object to intellect without discipline; I object to power without constructive purpose.    Spock
Voters quickly forget what a man says.    Richard Nixon
Every man has a right to his opinion, but no man has a right to be wrong in his facts.    Bernard M. Baruch
Certainly I know what to do, and when I am Vice President - and when I will be - there will be contingency plans under different situations. And I'll tell you what - I'm not going to go out and have a news conference about it, I'm going to put it in a safe and keep it there! Does that answer the question?    J. Danforth Quayle
Eat a live toad first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
It is convenient that there be gods, and, as it is convenient, let us believe there are.    Ovid
I know nothing except the fact of my ignorance.    Socrates
I have always thought the actions of men the best interpreters of their thoughts.    John Locke
Prosperity is a great teacher; adversity a greater.    William Hazlitt
It is always the best policy to tell the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.    Jerome K. Jerome
Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.    Ambrose Bierce
The inevitable result of improved and enlarged communication between different levels in a heirarchy is a vastly increased area of misunderstanding.    Thomas L. Martin
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.    Winston Churchill
Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.    John Stuart Mill
Women are nothing but machines for producing children.    Napolean
A nuclear power plant is infinitely safer than eating, because 300 people choke to death on food every year.    Dixy Lee Ray
Truth is a river that is always splitting up into arms that reunite. Islanded between the arms the inhabitants argue for a lifetime as to which is the main river.    Cyril Connolly
It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.    Alfred Adler
It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried.    Winston Churchill
Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past.    George Orwell
I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out in a war fought with the atomic bomb. Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.    Albert Einstein
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.    Zsa Zsa Gabor
Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.    William F. Buckley
Print is the sharpest and the strongest weapon of our party.    Joseph Stalin
Japan is an important ally of ours. Japan and the United States of the western industrialized capacity, 60 percent of the GNP, two countries. That's a statement in and of itself.    J. Danforth Quayle
When a fellow says it ain't the money but the principle of the thing, it's the money.    Kin Hubbard
There is nothing that a good defense cannot beat a better offense. In other words, a good offense wins.    J. Danforth Quayle
The only accident [at Three Mile Island] is that this thing leaked out. You could have avoided this whole thing by not saying anything.    Craig Faust (control-room operator at TMI)
I don't watch it, but I know enough to comment on it.    J. Danforth Quayle
One need only look at Dolly Parton to realize that good things don't always come in small packages.
There's always an easy solution to every human problem - neat, plausible, and wrong.    H. L. Mencken
If you wish to be a success in the world, promise everything, deliver nothing.    Napoleon
It is not enough to succed. Others must fail.    Gore Vidal
There is nothing as stupid as an educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.    Will Rogers
For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction.    Lord Byron
Nothing is built on stone; all is built on sand, but we must build as if the sand were stone.    Jorge Luis Borges
Skepticism, like chastity should not be relinquished too readily.    George Santayana
[The Gulf War is] a stirring victory for the forces of aggression.    J. Danforth Quayle
The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.    Anatole France
Never tolerate the establishment of two continental powers in Europe.    Adolf Hitler
He travels the fastest who travels alone.    Rudyard Kipling
Democracy is the worst system devised by the wit of man, except for all the others.    Winston Churchill
Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.    Samuel Johnson
Authority tends to assign jobs to those least able to do them.    Richard C. Cornuelle
Technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards.    Aldous Huxley
A army's effectiveness depends on its size, training, experience and morale ... and morale is worth more than all the other factors combined.    Napoleon Bonaparte
Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.    Laurence Peter
Do you not know, my son, with what little understanding the world is ruled?    Pope Julius III
An optimist is a person who goes to the window every morning and says, "Good morning, God!" The pessimist goes to the window every morning and says, "Good god, morning!"
A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.    Saki
Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.    Pope John XXIII
It's the opinion of some that crops could be grown on the moon. Which raises the fear that it may not be long before we're paying somebody not to.    Franklin P. Jones
Anyone who says he isn't going to resign, four times, definitely will.    John Kenneth Galbraith
If you have trouble sleeping, try lying on the end of your bed. With a little luck you'll drop off.    Mark Twain
Success always necessitates a degree of ruthlessness. Given the choice of friendship or success, I'd probably choose success.    Sting (Gordon Summer)
From a historical basis, Middle East conflicts do not last a long time.    J. Danforth Quayle
Nobody can be so amusingly arrogant as a young man who has just discovered an old idea and thinks it is his own.    Sydney Harris
What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.    Aristotle
Tolerance means excusing the mistakes others make. Tact means not noticing them.    Arthur Schnitzler
When you read a classic you do not see in the book more than you did before. You see more in you than there was before.    Clifton Fadiman
The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible.    Albert Einstein
Democrats eat the fish they catch. Republicans hang them on the wall.
Be careful what you set your heart upon - for it will surely be yours.    James Baldwin
The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore.    Samuel Butler
And you may ask yourself "Am I right? ... Am I wrong?" And you may say to yourself "MY GOD! ... WHAT HAVE I DONE?"    The Talking Heads
A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to want to take it off you.    Francoise Sagan
I love Vermont because of her hills and valleys, her scenery and invigorating climate, but most of all because of her indomitable people.    Calvin Coolidge
Forgive me my nonsense as I also forgive the nonsense of those who think they talk sense.    Robert Frost
Lord, give us the wisdom to utter words that are gentle and tender, for tomorrow we may have to eat them.    Morris Udall
But I have seen the science I worshipped and the airplane I loved destroying the civilization I expected them to serve.    Charles A. Lindbergh, Jr.
No man means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous.    Henry B. Adams
If God, as some now say, is dead, He no doubt died of trying to find an equitable solution to the Arab-Jewish problem.    I. F. Stone
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.    Edmund Burke
Religions tend to disappear with man's good fortune.    Raymond Queneau
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build bridges even when there are no rivers.    Nikita Khruschev
There's a lot to be said for being noveau riche, and the Reagans mean to say it all.    Gore Vidal
I was in the darkness; I could not see my words Nor the wishes of my heart. Then suddenly there was a great light--- "Let me into the darkness again."    Stephan Crane
Forget your opponents. Always play against par.    Sam Snead
Passions are fashions.    Clifton Fadiman
It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.    Salvor Hardin
I'll carry your books, I'll carry a tune, I'll carry on, carry over, carry forward, Cary Grant, cash & carry, Carry Me Back To Old Virginia, I'll even Hara Kari if you show me how, but I will not carry a gun.    Hawkeye
The fewer clear facts you have in support of an opinion, the stronger your emotional attachment to that opinion.
The measure of man is what he does with power.    Pittacus
Wit sometimes enables us to act rudely with impunity.    Francois
To seek permission is to seek denial.    Steve Jobs
Every man's life ends the same way. It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another.    Ernest Hemingway
The true statesman is the one who is willing to take risks.    Charles de Gaulle
Universal suffrage is the government of a house by its nursery.    Otto von Bismarck
An optimist proclaims that this is the best of all possible worlds, and a pessimist fears that it is true.
Certainly the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you; if you don't bet, you can't win.    Lazarus Long
He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that.    John Stuart Mill
One of the weaknesses of our age is our apparent inability to distinguish our needs from our greeds.    Don Robinson
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.    Benjamin Disraeli
It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.    Mark Twain
A witty saying proves nothing.    Voltaire
History will teach us nothing.    Sting (Gordon Summer)
The specialist learns more and more about less and less until, finally, he knows everything about nothing; whereas the generalist learns less and less about more and more until, finally, he knows nothing about everything.
If the average man is made in God's image, then such a man as Beethoven or Aristotle is plainly superior to God.
A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself.    Jessamyn West
The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made.    Jean Giraudoux
There are no atheists in the foxholes.    William Thomas Cummings
A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another's.    Jean Paul Richter
Any father who thinks he's all important should remind himself that this country honors fathers only one day a year while pickles get a whole week.
Every silver lining's got a touch of grey    The Grateful Dead
Liberty don't work as good in practice as it does in speeches.    Will Rogers
H. L. Mencken suffers from the hallucination that he is H. L. Mencken -- there is no cure for a disease of that magnitude.    Maxwell Bodenheim
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it.... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.    Will Rogers
Any party which takes credit for the rain must not be surprised if its opponents blame it for the draught.    Dwight Morrow
Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action.    Benjaimn Disraeli
Americans have always attached particular value to the word "neighbor." While the spirit of neighborliness was important on the frontier because neighbors were so few, it is even more important now because our neighbors are so many.    Lady Bird Johnson
Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.    Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.    Martin Luther King
I wear their scorn as a badge of honor.    J. Danforth Quayle
Stay in with the Outs (the Ins will make so many mistakes you can't afford to alienate the Outs).
Remember, inside every silver lining... there's a dark cloud.    George Carlin
At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on the computer.    Tom Gibb
Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten.    B. F. Skinner
Nothing is more destructive of respect for the government and the law of the land than passing laws which cannot be enforced.    Albert Einstein
It is true that liberty is precious - so precious that it must be rationed.    Nikolai Lenin
I suppose three important things certainly come to my mind that we want to say thank you. The first would be our family. Your family, my family - which is composed of an immediate family of a wife and three children, a larger family with grandparents and aunts and uncles.    J. Danforth Quayle
Television is the first truly democratic culture - the first culture available to everybody and entirely governed by what the people want. The most terrifying thing is what people do want.    Clive Barnes
Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.
They [Nazis] came first for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me, and by that time there was no one left to speak up.    Martin Niemoller
Liberal - a power worshipper without power.    George Orwell
It is better, of course, to know useless things than to know nothing.    Seneca
The reason that lovers never weary each other is because they are always talking about themselves.    Francois
We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.    Aesop
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted; musicians denoted; cowboys deranged; models deposed; tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?    Virginia Ostman
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.    Niels Bohr
We believe that to err is human. To blame it on someone else is politics.    Hubert H. Humphrey
Nobody is more dangerous than he who imagines himself pure in heart; for his purity, by definition, is unassailable.    James Baldwin
We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles.    Mark Twain
The chief cause of problems is solutions.    Eric Sevareid
The prestige of government has undoubtedly been lowered considerably by the Prohibition law. For nothing is more destructive of respect for the government and the law of the land than passing laws which cannot be enforced. It is an open secret that the dangerous increase of crime in this country is closely connected with this.    Albert Einstein
Democracy is that form of government where everybody gets what the majority deserves.    James Dale Davidson
Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs.    Henry Ford
Sometimes pain can drive a man harder than pleasure.    James T. Kirk
Censorship, like charity, should begin at home, but unlike charity, it should end there.    Clare Boothe Luce
Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.    Henry David Thoreau
Life is a great surprise. I do not see why death should not be an even greater one.    Vladimir Nabokov
I may not always be right, but I'm never wrong.    Sam Goldwyn
It would be inappropriate for the President of the United States to try to fine-tune for the people of Hungary how they ought to eat - how the cow out to eat the cabbage, as we say in the United States.    George Bush
The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it.    Abbie Hoffman
The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little.    Franklin D. Roosevelt
All our knowledge merely helps us to die a more painful death than the animals that know nothing.    Maurice Maeterlinck
A man who is always ready to believe what is told him will never do well.    Gaius Petronius
If God had meant there to be more than 2 factors of production, He would have made it easier for us to draw three-dimensional diagrams.    Robert Solow
It is much more secure to be feared than to be loved.    Niccolo Machiavelli
Everything tastes more or less like chicken.    Jeffery F. Chamberlain
If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.    George Bernard Shaw
The amount of pleasure derived from a cigarette is directly proportional to the number of the non-smokers in the vicinity.    Raj K. Dhawan
In the long run we are all dead.    John Maynard Keynes
Always do what you are afraid to do.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
A religion can no more afford to degrade its Devil than to degrade its God.
The sports page records people's accomplishments; The front page nothing but their failures.    Supreme Court Justice Earl Warren
Clothe an idea in words and it loses its freedom of movement.    Egon Friedell
Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.    Ambrose Bierce
One of the joys of travel is visiting new towns and meeting new people.    Genghis Khan
If someone with a rural accent says, "I don't know anything about politics," zip up your pockets.    Donald Rumsfeld
Here comes the orator, with his flood of words and his drop of reason.
The honeymoon is over when he phones that he'll be late for supper -- and she has already left a note that it's in the refrigerator.    Bill Lawrence
We never know whether we are victors or whether we are defeated.    Jorge Luis Borges
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.    Frank Lloyd Wright
Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?    Mae West
I never loved another person the way I loved myself.    Mae West
Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.    Oscar Wilde
It is most unwise for people in love to marry.    George Bernard Shaw
So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.    Psalms 90:10
We should declare war on North Vietnam... We could pave the whole country and put parking strips on it, and be home by Christmas.    Ronald Reagan
If you can count your money you don't have a billion dollars.    J. Paul Getty
Although prepared for martyrdom, I preferred that it be postponed.    Winston Churchill
The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children.    Clarence Darrow
I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.    Frank Herbert
I have one great fear in my heart, that one day when they [the whites of South Africa] have turned to loving, they will find we [the blacks] are turned to hating.    Alan Paton
My friends, no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will never, never surrender to what is right.    J. Danforth Quayle
Be pleasant no matter how much it hurts.    James T. Kirk
I never deny, I never contradict. I sometimes forget.    Benjamin Disraeli
The victor will never be asked if he told the truth.    Adolf Hitler
A bee is not a busier animal than a blockhead.    Alexander Pope
I don't care how poor and inefficient a country is; they like to run their own business. I know men that would make my wife a better husband than I am; but, darn it, I'm not going to give her to 'em.    Will Rogers
I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.    Chuang Tzu
Once a man gets a reputation as a liar, he might as well be struck dumb, for people do not listen to the wind.    Pop Baslim
Confront a child, a puppy, and a kitten with a sudden danger; the child will turn instinctively for more assistance, the puppy will grovel in abject submission, the kitten will brace its tiny body for a frantic resistance.    H. H. Munro
No good deed goes unpunished.    Clare Boothe Luce
There is no sin except stupidity.    Oscar Wilde
Power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely.    Lord Acton
Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich.    Napoleon
Intellectuals solve problems, geniuses prevent them.    Albert Einstein
Politics is for the present, but an equation is something for eternity.    Albert Einstein
Opinions founded on prejudice are always sustained with the greatest violence.    Hebrew Proverb
Experience... is simply the name we give our mistakes.    Oscar Wilde
I stood upon a high place, and saw, below, many devils, running, leaping, and carousing in sin. One looked up, grinning, and said, "Comrade! Brother!"    Stephan Crane
Amusement is the happiness of those who cannot think.    Alexander Pope
One of the greatest pieces of economic wisdom is to know what you do not know.    John Kenneth Galbraith
Man is ultimately superior to any mechanical device.    James T. Kirk
It was one of those perfect summer days -- the sun was shining, a breeze was blowing, the birds were singing, and the lawn mower was broken.    James Dent
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall not be disappointed.    Gene Franklin
Is life so dear, or peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery?    Patrick Henry
We think there is a parallel between federal involvement in education and the decline in profit over recent years.    Ronald Reagan
That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind.    Neil Armstrong
A good workman is known by his tools.    Proverb
Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others, and the delight in the recognition.    Alexander Smith
The world began without man, and it will complete itself without him.    Claude Levi-Strauss
If you're worried about caribou, take a look at the arguments that were used about the pipeline. They'd say caribou would be extinct. You've got to shake them away with a stick. They're all making love lying up against the pipeline and you've got thousands of caribou up there.    George Bush
Politics is war without bloodshed while war is politics with bloodshed.    Mao Zedong
War is much too serious a matter to be entrusted to the military.    Georges Clemenceau
Few of us ever test our powers of deduction, except when filling out an income tax form.
It is true that if your paperboy throws your paper into the bushes for five straight days it can be explained by Newton's Law of Gravity. But it takes Murphy's law to explain why it is happening to you.
People will accept your idea much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first.    David H. Comins
If you worry about your customers, you won't have to worry about money.    Les Welch
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.    Robert Benchley
The idea is to die young as late as possible.    Ashley Montagu
Impropriety is the soul of wit.    W. Somerset Maugham
People will swim through shit if you put a few bob in it.    Peter Sellers
Experience enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
Cinema should make you forget you are sitting in a theater.    Roman Polanski
It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.    Harry S. Truman
In hell there is no other punishment than to begin over and over again the tasks left unfinished in your lifetime.    Andre Gide
The price of hating other human beings is loving oneself less.    Eldridge Cleaver
A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.    Wilson Mizner
Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.    Ambrose Bierce
Always be nice to those younger than you, because they are the ones who will be writing about you.    Cyril Connolly
The will to win is worthless if you don't get paid for it.    Reggie Jackson
I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.    Ashleigh Brilliant
It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated.    Alec Bourne
The horror! The horror!    Joseph Conrad
A foot is a device for finding furniture in the dark.
There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.    Kenneth H. Olson
It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations.    Winston Churchill
Religion ... is the opium of the masses.    Karl Marx
He that lives upon Hope dies farting.    Benjamin Franklin
A chicken doesn't stop scratching just because the worms are scarce.    John Peers
Never argue with a fool - people might not know the difference.
A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel.    Robert Frost
Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.    George Bernard Shaw
Progress, far from consisting in change, depends on retentiveness... Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.    George Santayana
Lord, when we are wrong, make us easy to change. And when we are right, make us easy to live with.    Peter Marshall
Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.    Samuel Butler
We must acknowledge once and for all that the purpose of diplomacy is to prolong a crisis.    Spock
Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.    Woody Allen
It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees!    Emiliano Zapata
A "critic" is a person who creates nothing and thereby feels qualified to judge the work of creative people. There is logic in this; he is unbiased -- he hates all creative people equally.    Lazarus Long
History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.    Napoleon
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.    Derek Bok
Difference of religion breeds more quarrels than difference of politics.    Wendell Phillips
In a bureaucracy accomplishment is inversely proportional to volume of paper used.    Foster L. Fowler
If the nation's economists were laid end to end, they would point in all directions.    Arthur H. Motley
They made us many promises, more than I can remember, but they never kept but one; they promised to take our land, and they took it.    Red Cloud
Resolved, that the women of this nation in 1876, have greater cause for discontent, rebellion and revolution than the men of 1776.    Susan B. Anthony
Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.    Josh Billings
In some cases non-violence requires more militancy than violence.    Cesar Chavez
It may be that our role on this planet is not to worship God, but to create him.    Arthur C. Clarke
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.    Winston Churchil
Don't worry about avoiding temptation -- as you grow older, it starts avoiding you.    The Old Farmer's Almanac
Nobody believes the official spokesman ... but everybody trusts an unidentified source.    Ron Nesen
When we see persons of worth, we should think of equaling them; when we see persons of a contrary character, we should turn inwards and examine ourselves.    Confucius
To give up the task of reforming society is to give up one's responsibility as a free man.    Alan Paton
In the long history of medicine, no doctor has ever caught the first few minutes of a play.    Leonard McCoy
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.    Mark Twain
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.    H. L. Mencken
When the president does it, that means it is not illegal.    Richard Nixon
I speak Spanish to God, Italian to women, French to men, and German to my horse.    Charles V
It is a commonplace observation that work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.    C. Northcote Parkinson
How immense appear to us the sins that we have not committed.
Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.    Joe Louis
Bore, n: a person who talks when you wish him to listen.    Ambrose Bierce
It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.    Franklin D. Roosevelt
Por un teu mais terno olhar dera da vida a metade: 'nun sorriso dera a vida por un beijo a eternidade    Traditional Portuguese poem
If you really want to make a lot of money, start your own religion.    L. Ron Hubbard
The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because generally they are the same people.    G. K. Chesterton
What a waste it is to lose one's mind or not to have a mind... How true it is.    J. Danforth Quayle
An era can be said to end when its basic illusions are exhausted.    Arthur Miller
Government expands to absorb revenue -- and then some.    Tom Wicker
To do nothing is also a good remedy.    Hippocrates
The probability of anything happening is in inverse ratio to its desirability.    John W. Hazard
May our nation continue to be the beakon [sic] of hope to the world.    J. Danforth Quayle
When smashing monuments, save the pedestals - they always come in handy.    Stanislaw Lec
Cry, the beloved country, for the unborn child that is the inheritor of our fear. Let him not love the earth too deeply... For fear will rob him of all if he gives too much.    Alan Paton
I hope I stand for anti-bigotry, anti-Semitism, anti-racism.    George Bush
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.    Will Rogers
Genius is one per cent inspiration and ninety-nine per cent perspiration.    Thomas Alva Edison
When the law is against you, argue the facts. When the facts are against you, argue the law. When both are against you, call the other lawyer names.
A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.    Butler
An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
Only constant and conscientious practice in the Martial Arts will ensure a long and happy life.    Bruce Lee
Every problem contains within itself the seeds of its own solution.
I like a man who grins when he fights.    Winston Churchill
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be - a Christian.    Mark Twain
Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.    Alex Hamilton
Genuine religion is not so much a matter of feeling as a matter of principle.    Alexander Pope
Because Vietnam was not a declared war, the veterans are not even eligible for the G.I. Bill of Rights with respect to education or anything.    Ronald Reagan
Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is the truth.    Gandhi
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich.    John F. Kennedy
Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
There is no great genius without some touch of madness.    Seneca
A politician is an animal which can sit on a fence and yet keep both ears to the ground.    H. L. Mencken
Facts are stupid things.    Ronald Reagan
A physician is not angry at the intemperance of a mad patient, nor does he take it ill to be railed at by a man in a fever. Just so should a wise man treat all mankind, as a physician treats a patient, and look upon them only as sick and extravagant.    Seneca
A shortcut is the longest distance between two points.    Professor Charles P. Issawi
Liberty is always dangerous, but it is the safest thing we have.    Harry Emerson Fosdick
History proves nothing.    Bill Gray
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.    Mark Twain
I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is -- I could be just as proud for half the money.    Arthur Godfrey
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.    Franklin P. Jones
In this world, nothing is certain but death and taxes.    Benjamin Franklin
All other things being equal, a bald man cannot be elected President of the United States.    Vic Gold
Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless.    Thomas Edison
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.    Mark Twain
There is no such thing as justice - in or out of court.    Clarence Darrow
There is no such thing as a nonracial society in a multiracial country.    F. W. de Klerk
The trouble with being a breadwinner nowadays is that the Government is in for such a big slice.
Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.    Will Rogers
Women and elephants never forget an injury.    Saki
Because of the greatness of the Shah, Iran is an island of stability in the Middle East.    Jimmy Carter
The first sign of a nervous breakdown is when you start thinking your work is terribly important.    Milo Bloom
Fascism's private ownership, private enterprise, but total government control and regulation. Well, isn't this the liberal philosophy?    Ronald Reagan
Children have more energy after a hard day of play than they do after a good night's sleep.    Dr. R. F. Gumperson
Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that someone might be looking.    H. L. Mencken
A good neighbor is one who will watch your vacation slides all evening without telling you that he has been there.
A real diplomat is one who can cut his neighbor's throat without having his neighbor notice it.    Trygve Lie
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.    Mark Twain
You can build a throne out of bayonets, but you can't sit on it for very long.    Boris Yeltsin
Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on im personally.    Abraham Lincoln
Only a sadistic scoundrel -- or a fool -- tells the bald truth on social occasions.    Lazarus Long
Pacifism is simply undisguised cowardice.    Adolf Hitler
Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does the work.    Mark Twain
We are what we pretend to be.    Kurt Vonnegut
Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.    J. Danforth Quayle
Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.    Kin Hubbard
Doctors, dentists, and lawyers are only on time for appointments when you're not.    Roxanne Weissman
Common sense in an uncommon degree is what the world calls wisdom.    Coleridge
Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.    J. Danforth Quayle
Why wouldn't an enhanced deterrent, a more stable peace, a better prospect to denying the ones who enter conflict in the first place to have a reduction of offensive systems and an introduction to defensive capability. I believe that is the route this country will eventually go.    J. Danforth Quayle
Measure twice, cut once.
America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilization.    Georges Clemenceau
Every great or original writer in proportion as he is great or original, must himself create the taste by which he must be relished.    Wordsworth
Women like silent men. They think they're listening.    Marcel Archard
Nine times out of ten, in the arts as in life, there is actually no truth to be discovered; there is only error to be exposed.    H. L. Mencken
A verbal contract isn't worth the paper its printed on.    Sam Goldwyn
A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.    Samuel Goldwyn
What passes for woman's intuition is often nothing more than man's transparency.
It's a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it's a depression when you lose yours.    Harry S. Truman
When choosing between two evils, I always like to take the one I've never tried before.    Mae West
Democracy is based on the assumption that a million men are wiser than one man. How's that again? I missed something. Autocracy is based on the assumption that one man is wiser than a million men. Let's play that one over again, too. Who decides?    Lazarus Long
It is the doom of men that they forget.    Merlin
Discovery consists in seeing what everyone else has seen and thinking what no one else has thought.    Albert Szent-Gyorgi
Everybody believes in rugged individualism, but you'll do better by pleasing the boss.    Charles Merrill Smith
We need excellence in public education and if the teachers can't do it, we'll send in a couple of policemen.    Frank Rizzo
A leader is best when people barely know he exists ... When his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say, "We did this ourselves."    Lao-Tse
I bet the human brain is a kludge.    Marvin Minsky
You do not destroy an idea by killing people; you replace it with a better one.    Edward Keating
For the first time in history, one bag of groceries produces two bags of trash.    Robert Orben
I think when a person has been found guilty of rape he should be castrated. That would stop him pretty quick.    Billy Graham
You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends.    Joseph Conrad
The hottest places in Hell are reserved for those who in time of great moral crises maintain their neutrality.    Dante
A recession is when my neighbor loses his job. A depression is when I lose my job. A panic is when my wife loses her job.    Edgar R. Fiedler
Genius does what it must, talent does what it can.
Sometimes democracy must be bathed in blood.    Augusto Pinochet
People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election.    Otto von Bismarck
The optimist proclaims we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.    James B. Cabell
The will to win is important, but it isn't worth a damn unless you also have the will to prepare.
The world is an enormous injustice.    Jules Romains
Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.    Susan Ertz
Computer: a million morons working at the speed of light.    David Ferrier
Mr Attlee is a very modest man. Indeed he has much to be modest about.    Winston Churchill
A city is a large community where people are lonesome together.    Herbert Prochnow
If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error.    John Kenneth Galbraith
Every reign must submit to a greater reign.    Seneca
The place where optimism most flourishes is the lunatic asylum.    Havelock Ellis
What passes for optimism is most often the effect on an intellectual error.    Raymond Aron
The illusion that times that were are better than those that are, has probably pervaded all ages.    Horace Greeley
In critical moments men sometimes see exactly what they wish to see.    Spock
War will cease when men refuse to fight.    Fridtjof Hansen
One cannot make an omelette without breaking eggs -- but it is amazing how many eggs one can break without making a decent omelette.    Professor Charles P. Issawi
The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.    Henry Kissinger
Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees have to be appointed to do the work.
Must the hunger become anger and the anger fury before anything will be done?    John Steinbeck
Experience is the comb that Nature gives us when we are bald.
A military disaster may produce a better postwar situation than victory.    Shimon Tzabar
We make war that we may live in peace.    Aristotle
In America, any boy may become president and I suppose that's just one of the risks he takes.    Adlai Stevenson
The word "good" has many meanings. For example, if a man were to shoot his grandmother at a range of five hundred yards, I should call him a good shot, but not necessarily a good man.
Youth is a blunder, manhood a struggle, old age a regret.    Benjamin Disraeli
There is nothing permanent except change.    Heraclitus
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.    Laurence J. Peter
Television - a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done.    Ernie Kovacs
At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer.    Marshall Lumsden
The victors invariably write the history to their own advantage.    Jean-Luc Picard
One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly.    Friedrich Nietzsche
People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history.    J. Danforth Quayle
Bad law is more likely to be supplemented than repealed.    Dalin B. Oaks
Mediocre minds usually dismiss anything which reaches beyond their own understanding.    Francois
Marriage is distinctly and repeatedly excluded from heaven. Is this because it is thought likely to mar the general felicity?    Samuel Butler
Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.    Albert Einstein
A President cannot always be popular.    Harry S. Truman
Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do.    Ronald Reagan
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular representatives of the oppressing class are to represent and repress them.    Karl Marx
Licker talks mighty loud w'en it gets loose fum de jug.    Joel C. Harris
It's not your blue blood, your pedigree or your college degree. It's what you do with your life that counts.    Millard Fuller
Governments last as long as the under-taxed can defend themselves from the over-taxed.
Great deeds are usually wrought at great risks.    Herodotus
All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.    Alexander Woollcott
Rebellions of the belly are the worst.    Francis Bacon
Cynicism -- the intellectual cripple's substitute for intelligence.    Russell Lynes
As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.    Dick Cavett
People are always talking about tradition, but they forget we have a tradition of a few hundred years of nonsense and stupidity, that there is a tradition of idiocy, incompetence and crudity.    Hugo Demartini
The test of the morality of a society is what it does for its children.    Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world.    Arthur Schopenhauer
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.    Elbert Hubbard
Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself, (I am large, I contain multitudes.)    Walt Whitman
History repeats itself. That's one of the things wrong with history.    Clarence Darrow
Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others.    Groucho Marx
What luck for the rulers that men do not think.    Adolf Hitler
Wit is cultured insolence.    Aristotle
For every human problem, there is a neat plain solution -- and it is always wrong.    H. L. Mencken
Unrecognized faults lead to wasted efforts    Joanot Martorell
Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair.    George Burns
I have never been able to understand why it is that just because I am unintelligible nobody can understand me.    Milton Mayer
Truth is most valuable thing we have. Let us economize it.    Mark Twain
People who know little are usually great talkers, while men who know much say little.    Jean Jacques Rousseau
Any college that would take your son he should be too proud to go to.    Erma Bombeck
O God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!    Shakespeare
The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth which it prevents you from achieving.    Russell Green
All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.    George Orwell
Justice is incidental to law and order.    J. Edgar Hoover
Women have served all these centuries as looking-glasses possessing the magic and delicious power of reflecting the figure of man at twice its natural size.    Virginia Woolf
I am grateful for all my problems. As each of them was overcome I became stronger and more able to meet those yet to come. I grew on all my difficulties.    J. C. Penney
Maxim 914: Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.    Publilius Syrus
He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.    Chinese proverb
Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.    Albert Einstein
After adding two weeks to the schedule for unexpected delays, add two more for the unexpected, unexpected delays.
The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.    Josh Billings
The American public knows what it wants, and deserves to get it good and hard.    H. L. Mencken
It's a good idea to keep your words soft and sweet to the taste. You may have to eat them.
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: PRESIDENT CAN'T SWIM.    Lyndon B. Johnson
No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.    H. L. Mencken
When other people take a long time to do something, they're slow; when we take a long time, we're thorough. When they don't do something, they're lazy; when we don't, we're too busy. When they succeed, they're lucky; when we do, we deserve it.
It takes two to speak the truth - one to speak and the other to hear.    Henry David Thoreau
I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.    W.C. Fields
In economics, the majority is always wrong.    John Kenneth Galbraith
Why should we subsidize intellectual curiosity?    Ronald Reagan
A man said to the universe, "Sir, I exist." "However," replied the universe, "the fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."    Stephan Crane
What money does is give you the opportunity not to worry about money.    Gene Simmons
Give me liberty or give me death!    Patrick Henry
The modern conservative is engaged in one of man's oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.    John Kenneth Galbraith
Old people like to give good advice, as solace for no longer being able to provide bad examples.    Francois
In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts; they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is better for a city to be governed by a good man than by good laws.    Aristotle
O God, give us serenity to accept what cannot be changed, courage to change what should be changed, and wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.    Reinhold Niebuhr
Absence diminishes little passions and increases great ones, as wind extinguishes candles and fans a fire.    Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Let us begin by committing ourselves to the truth - to see it like it is, and tell it like it is - to find the truth, to speak the truth, and live the truth.    Richard Nixon. accepting the Presidential
Of all possible committee reactions to any given agenda item, the reaction that will occur is the one which will liberate the greatest amount of hot air.    Thomas L. Martin
When I sell liquor, its called bootlegging; when my patrons serve it on Lake Shore Drive, its called hospitality.    Al Capone
Many live by their wits but few by their wit.    Laurence J. Peter
He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help.    Abraham Lincoln
If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.    Albert Einstein
The meek shall inherit the Earth. In three foot by six foot plots.    Lazarus Long
The meek shall inherit the Earth, but not its mineral rights.    J. Paul Getty
In times of crisis, it is of utmost importance not to lose one's head.    Marie Antoinette
If I have seen far, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.    Sir Isaac Newton
In science, the credit goes to the man who convinces the world, not to whom the idea first occurs.    Sir Francis Darwin
The heart has its prisons that intelligence cannot unlock.    Marcel Jouhandeau
We've already established what you are, ma'am. Now we're just haggling over the price.    George Bernard Shaw
A man is never astonished that he doesn't know what another does, but he is surprised at the gross ignorance of the other in not knowing what he does.    Haliburton
Better a broken promise than none at all.    Mark Twain
The bitter part of discretion is valor.    Henry W. Nevinson
The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.
Attention to detail is the watchword for gleaning information from an unsuspecting witness.    Inspector Cleuseau
Foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool.    Richard Feynman
The Vice Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate. Everybody insists he won't take it, but somebody always does.    Bill Vaughan
It is well that war is so terrible, or we should get too fond of it.    Robert E. Lee
A successful person is one who went ahead and did the thing the rest of us never quite got around to.
If you go on with this nuclear arms race, all you are going to do is make the rubble bounce.    Winston Churchill
The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.    Albert Einstein
Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.    Mother Teresa
Half of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.    Solomon Short
An ounce of emotion is equal to a ton of facts.    John Junor
Every man of genius is considerably helped by being dead.
God is not dead. He is alive and working working on a less ambitious project.
Doctor to patient: First the good news -- you're going to have a disease named after you.
In time of war the first casualty is truth.    Boake Carter
People find life entirely too time-consuming.    Stanislaw J. Lec
Few rich men own their own property. The property owns them.    Robert G. Ingersoll
Most people get a fair amount of fun out of their lives, but on balance life is suffering and only the very young or the very foolish imagine otherwise.    George Orwell
Economists state their GNP growth projections to the nearest tenth of a percentage point to prove they have a sense of humor.    Edgar R. Fiedler
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.    Ogden Nash
If everybody's behavior can be explained by simple stupidity and greed, there's no point in assuming a conspiracy.    P. J. Plauger
Words divide us, action unites us.    Slogan of the Tupamaros
The duration of passion is proportionate with the original resistance of the woman.    Honore de Balzac
"Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!"    Lewis Carroll
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution, yet.    Mae West
I can't give you brains, but I can give you a diploma.    The Wizard of Oz
There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.    Oscar Wilde
Big Brother Is Watching You    George Orwell
There is just one thing I can promise you about the outer-space program: Your tax dollar will go farther.
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.    Laurence Peter
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.    Jack Rosenbaum
A public debt is a kind of anchor in the storm; but if the anchor be too heavy for the vessel, she will be sunk by that very weight which was intended for her preservation.    Colton
The semi-conscious mind is a tricky thing.  A man never knows just how much is real or how much is imagination.    Leonard McCoy
Care of the poor is incumbent on society as a whole.    Spinoza
I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
Mars is essentially in the same orbit... We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe.    J. Danforth Quayle
Everything you read in the newspapers is absolutely true except for that rare story of which you happen to have firsthand knowledge.    Erwin Knoll
It's better to rule in hell than serve in heaven.    Milton
I don't mind living in a man's world as long as I can be a woman in it.    Marilyn Monroe
He who is conceived in a cage yearns for the cage.    Yevgeny Yevtushenko
I have been staying in Moscow for only 24 hours, but already I feel almost at home.    Hashemi Rafsanjani
Imagination is more important than knowledge.    Albert Einstein
I think it's about time we voted for senators with breasts. After all, we've been voting for boobs long enough.    Claire Sargent
Anybody who hates children and dogs can't be all bad.    W. C. Fields
Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can: all of them make me laugh.    W. H. Auden
Heav'n has no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury like a woman scorn'd.    William Congreve
The easiest way to figure the cost of living is to take your income and add ten percent.
Everybody should believe in something -- I believe I'll have another drink.    Mary Steele
The world may be divided into people that read, people that write, people that think, and fox hunters.    Shenstone
Only the winners decide what were war crimes.    Gary Wills
Grub first, then ethics.    Bertolt Brecht
The best way to publicize a governmental or political action is to attempt to hide it.    Mark B. Cohen
There can be no justice so long as laws are absolute. Even life itself is an exercise in exceptions.    Jean-Luc Picard
A woman has to be twice as good as a man to go half as far.    Fannie Hurst
It is good to be without vices, but it is not good to be without temptations.    Walter Bagehot
I noticed that some household columns suggest that people use elbow grease for cleaning. After a long and fruitless search, I still have been unable to find this amazing product. Could you tell me where to buy it?
Yippies, hippies, yahoos, Black Panthers, lions and tigers alike -- I would swap the whole damn zoo for the kind of young Americans I saw in Vietnam.    Spiro Agnew
He travels fastest who travels alone ... but he hasn't anything to do when he gets there.
An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made, in a narrow field.    Niels Bohr
Statistics are a highly logical and precise method for saying a half-truth inaccurately.
You can't expect to hit the jackpot if you don't put a few nickels in the machine.    Flip Wilson
A man's got to know his limitations.    Clint Eastwood in "Magnum Force"
The most important things to do in this world are to get something to eat, somthing to drink and somebody to love you.    Brendan Behan
You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.    Franklin P. Jones
Too much of a good thing is wonderful.    Mae West
The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said.    Peter Drucker
Mediocrity knows nothing higher than itself, but talent instantly recognizes genius.    Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
The most important thing about Spaceship Earth - an instruction book didn't come with it.    R. Buckminster Fuller
One of my favorite philosophical tenets is that people will agree with you only if they already agree with you. You do not change people's minds.    Frank Zappa
Under a government which imprisons any unjustly, the true place for a just man is also a prison.    Henry David Thoreau
Doing easily what others find difficult is talent; doing what is impossible for talent is genius.    Henri-Frederic Amiel
I would guess that there's adequate low-income housing in this country.    J. Danforth Quayle
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.    Hector Berlioz
Everything put together sooner or later falls apart.    Paul Simon
History shows that when the taxes of a nation approach about 20% of the people's income, there begins to be a lack of respect for government.... When it reaches 25%, there comes an increase in lawlessness.    Ronald Reagan
There comes a time when men of good conscience cannot blindly follow orders.    Jean-Luc Picard
I don't know that atheists should be considered as citizens, nor should they be considered patriots. This is one nation under God.    George Bush
Man is but a reed, the weakest in nature, but he is a thinking reed.    Blaise Pascal
The race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong.    Ecclesiastes 9:11
Anybody that wants the presidency so much that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office.    David Broder
When the weight of the paperwork equals the weight of the plane, the plane will fly.    Donald Douglas
There's nothing in the middle of the road but yellow stripes and dead armadillos.    Jim Hightower
Ask a man which way he is going to vote, and he will probably tell you. Ask him, however, why, and vagueness is all.    Bernard Levin
If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.    Harry S. Truman
At 50 everyone has the face he deserves.    George Orwell
Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.    Alfred Hitchcock
I not only use all the brains that I have, but all that I can borrow.    Woodrow Wilson
Fascism was really the basis for the New Deal. It was Mussolini's success in Italy, with his government-directed economy, that led the early New Dealers to say 'But Mussolini keeps the trains running on time'.    Ronald Reagan
Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, opulence is when you have three -- and paradise is when you have none.    Doug Larson
It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.    J. Danforth Quayle
Given enough time, what you put off doing today will eventually get done by itself.    G. Gestra
Don't let the fact that you can't do all you want to do keep you from doing what you can do.
People who believe that the dead never come back to life should be here at quitting time.
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.    Abba Eban
A man's errors are what makes him amiable.    Goethe
Then what is it worth, this mining industry? And why should it be kept alive, if it is only our poverty that keeps it alive? ... Is it we that must be kept poor so that others may stay rich?    Alan Paton
No man is rich enough to buy back his past.    Oscar Wilde
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.    William Dement
If I wished to punish a province, I would have it governed by philosophers.    Frederick the Great
The limits of my language means the limits of my world.    Ludwig Wittgenstein
Any man who hates dogs and loves whiskey can't be all bad.    W. C. Fields
There are three things I always forget. Names, faces -- the third I can't remember.    Italo Svevo
I would have made a good pope.    Richard Nixon
Liars ought to have good memories.    Algernon Sidney
A generation which ignores history has no past -- and no future.
If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.    Florynce Kennedy
The writer is the engineer of the human soul.    Joseph Stalin
I favor the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and it must be enforced at gunpoint if necessary.    Ronald Reagan
When it is dark enough you can see the stars.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
A country can be judged by the quality of its proverbs.    German Proverb
Preparation, knowledge, and discipline can deal with any form of danger.    Tom Clancy
Time is the great legalizer, even in the field of morals.    H. L. Mencken
I would have voted against the Civil Rights Act of 1964.    Ronald Reagan
When you have nothing to say, say nothing.    Charles Caleb Colton
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.    Ashleigh Brilliant
We are still speaking the same language, but neither of us is hearing the other.    Hafez Assad
We are not abandoning our convictions, our philosophy or traditions, nor do we urge anyone to abandon theirs.    Mikhail Gorbachev
Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
Anyone who isn't confused really doesn't understand the situation.    Edward R. Murrow
Delusions are often functional. A mother's opinions about her children's beauty, intelligence, goodness, et cetera ad nauseam, keep her from drowning them at birth.    Lazarus Long
Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.    John F. Kennedy
A man should be careful never to tell tales of himself to his own disadvantage; people may be amused, and laugh at the time, but they will be remembered, and brought up against him upon some subsequent occasion.    Johnson
Maxim 1070: I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.    Publilius Syrus
When you take stuff from one writer it's plagiarism; but when you take it from many writers, it's research.    Wilson Mizner
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal.    Hannah More
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.    Mark Twain
The greatest task before civilization at present is to make machines what they ought to be, the slaves, instead of the masters of men.    Havelock Ellis
Expecting something for nothing is the most popular form of hope.    Arnold Glasow
The best substitute for experience is being sixteen.
The man who strikes first admits that his ideas have given out.    Chinese proverb
Most essential qualification for a politician: The ability to foretell what will happen tomorrow, next month, and next year -- and to explain afterward why it did not happen.    Winston Churchill
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.    Eleanor Roosevelt
Imprisoned in every fat man a thin man is wildly signaling to be let out.    Cyril Connolly
Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper.    Francis Bacon
I think that maybe if women and children were in charge we would get somewhere.    James Thurber
You're either part of the solution or part of the problem.    Eldridge Cleaver
The lion and the calf shall lie down together, but the calf won't get much sleep.    Woody Allen
The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.    Woody Allen
Many of us spend half our life wishing for things we could have if we didn't spend half our time wishing.    Alexander Woollcott
One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say.    Will Durant
Money is truthful. If a person speaks of his honor, make him pay cash.
The government [is] extremely fond of amassing great quantities of statistics. These are raised to the nth degree, the cube roots are extracted, and the results are arranged into elaborate and impressive displays. What must be kept ever in mind, however, is that in every case, the figures are first put down by a village watchman, and he puts down anything he damn well pleases.    Sir Josiah Stamp
The time to stop a revolution is at the beginning, not the end.    Adlai Stevenson
Anticipated events never live up to expectations.    Marion J. Levy, Jr.
Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.    Christopher J. Shaw
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.    Woody Allen
Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.    Proverbs 16:18
Draft registration destroys the very values that our society is committed to defending.    Ronald Reagan
That government is best which governs least.    Henry David Thoreau
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.    Will Durant
The average Ph.D. thesis is nothing but a transference of bones from one graveyard to another.    J. Frank Dobie
A good leader inspires others with confidence in him; a great leader inspires them with confidence in themselves.
The value of life lies not in the length of days, but in the use we make of them... Whether you find satisfaction in life depends not on your tale of years, but on your will.    Michel Eyquem de Montaigne
People want JUST taxes more than they want LOWER taxes. They want to know that every man is paying his proportionate share according to wealth.
We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.    Will Rogers
Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.    Simeon Strunsky
When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.    Mae West
Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done, and why. Then do it.    Lazarus Long
Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.    Soren Kierkegaard
A real friend is a person who, when you've made a fool of yourself, lets you forget it.
Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.    J. Danforth Quayle
A ship is always referred to as "she" because it costs so much to keep one in paint and powder.    Chester Nimitz
A wise man first determines what is within his control; all else is then irrelevant.    Epictetus
We compound our suffering by victimising each other.    Athol Fugard
And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country.    John F. Kennedy
If you can spend a perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you have learned how to live.    Lin Yutang
A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.    Robert Frost
No member of our generation who wasn't a Communist or a dropout in the thirties is worth a damn.    Lyndon B. Johnson
You don't tell deliberate lies, but sometimes you have to be evasive.    Margaret Thatcher
In March July, October, May, The Ides are on the fifteenth day, The Nones the seventh: all other months besides Have two days less for Nones and Ides.
Heresy is only another word for freedom of thought.    Graham Greene
Death is life's answer to the question 'Why?'
The ballot is stronger than the bullet.    Abraham Lincoln
All reformers, however strict their social conscience, live in houses just as big as they can pay for.    Logan Pearsall Smith
Productivity = (Number of secretaries X Average typing speed) / (Number of Scientists). Note that when the number of scientists is zero, productivity becomes infinite.    Robert Sommer
Laziness is the mother of nine inventions out of ten.    Philip K. Saunders
"Go to Hell!" or other direct insult is all the answer a snoopy question deserves.    Lazarus Long
Theirs not to make reply, Theirs not to reason why, Theirs but to do and die    Alfred Lord Tennyson
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.    Henry David Thoreau
Be like a duck -- keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil under water.
There are very few people who are not ashamed of having been in love when they no longer love each other.    Francois
Unfortunately, the people of Louisiana are not racists.    J. Danforth Quayle
You cannot be president of the United States if you don't have faith. Remember Lincoln, going to his knees in times of trial and the Civil War and all that stuff. You can't be. And we are blessed. So don't feel sorry for - don't cry for me, Argentina.    George Bush
It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.
Every revolutionary ends up either by becoming an oppressor or a heretic.    Albert Camus
Philanthropy is commendable, but it must not cause the the philanthropist to over-look the circumstances of economic injustice which make philanthropy necessary.    Martin Luther King
Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind.    John F. Kennedy
The more time you spend in reporting on what you are doing, the less time you have to do it in. Stability is achieved when you spend all your time doing nothing but reporting on the nothing you are doing.
We learn from experience. A man never wakes up his second baby just to see it smile.
Given a choice between two bald political candidates, the American people will vote for the less bald of the two.    Vic Gold
The difference between the right word and a similar word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.    Mark Twain
The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.    Woody Allen
The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning, while those other subjects merely require scholarship.    Lazarus Long
Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is IN the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here.    J. Danforth Quayle
The difference between a chef and a cook seems to be in who cleans up the kitchen.    Paul Sweeney
All files, papers, memos, etc., that you save will never be needed until such time as they are disposed of, when they will become essential and indispensable.    John Corcoran
Thirty days hath November, April, June, and September, February hath twenty-eight alone, And all the rest have thirty-one.    Richard Grafton
I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good and not quite all the time.    George Orwell
I have just signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever; we begin bombing in 5 minutes.    Ronald Reagan
It is better to be defeated on principle than to win on lies.    Arthur Calwell
A good teacher has been defined as one who makes himself progressively unnecessary.    Thomas J. Carruthers
Slums may well be breeding grounds of crime, but middle class suburbs are incubators of apathy and delirium.    Cyril Connolly
If you've seen one redwood, you've seen them all.    Ronald Reagan
An old car that served you so well will continue to serve you until you have just put four new tires under it and then will fall apart.    Erma Bombeck
If people really liked to work, we'd still be plowing the land with sticks and transporting goods on our backs.    William Feather
All who have meditated on the art of governing mankind have been convinced that the fate of empires depends on the education of youth.    Aristotle
Highways in worst need of repair naturally have low traffic counts, which results in low priority for repair work.
As a student I learned from wonderful teachers and ever since then I've thought everyone is a teacher.    Bill Moyers
Words are only painted fire; a book is the fire itself.    Mark Twain
You have not converted a man because you have silenced him.    John Morley
Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.    George Jean Nathan
What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog.    Dwight D. Eisenhower
The future is like heaven - everyone exalts it, but no one wants to go there now.    James Baldwin
Success is the sole earthly judge of right and wrong.    Adolf Hitler
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach.    Fanny Fern
Politicians should read science fiction, not westerns and detective stories.    Arthur C. Clarke
When in doubt, mumble; when in trouble, delegate; when in charge, ponder.    James H. Boren
Nothing is impossible. Some things are just less likely than others.    Jonathan Winters in "The Twilight Zone"
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.    Woody Allen
The camera cannot lie. But it can be an accessory to untruth.    Harold Evans
If we don't know life, how can we know death?    Confucius
Happy campers you are, happy campers you have been, and as far as I am concerned, happy campers you will always be.    J. Danforth Quayle
Without feeling there's no reason to live.    Andre Kertesz
A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular.    Adlai Stevenson
Men willingly believe what they wish.    Julius Caesar
If you don't like the weather in New England, wait fifteen minutes; it will change.    Mark Twain
Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well.    Samuel Butler
Cameras are so simple to operate now that taking pictures is much easier than getting friends to look at them.    Hugh Allen
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.    Will Rogers
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear.    Mark Twain
Cynics are right nine times out of ten; what undoes them is their belief that they are right ten times out of ten.    Professor Charles P. Issawi
Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.    Pancho Villa
Experience is the one thing you have plenty of when you're too old to get the job.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.    Harry S. Truman
Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.    George Bernard Shaw
There is more to life than increasing its speed.    Gandhi
It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.    George Bernard Shaw
Politics is just like show business. You have a hell of an opening, coast for a while, and then have a hell of a close.    Ronald Reagan
Believe those who are seeking the truth; doubt those who find it.    Andre Gide
Singing makes all the sad people happy because it is the voice of happiness.    Joseph Shabalala
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.    Will Rogers
Interpretation is the revenge of the intellect upon art.    Susan Sontag
The cruelest lies are often told in silence.    Robert Louis Stevenson
One lives in the hope of becoming a memory.    Antonio Porchia
In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of primitive self-expression. In America we call it golf.
Who knows for what we live, and struggle, and die? ... Wise men write many books, in words too hard to understand. But this, the purpose of our lives, the end of all our struggle, is beyond all human wisdom.    Alan Paton
A bureaucrat's castle is his desk ... and parking place. Proceed cautiously when changing either.    Douglas Evelyn
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.    Groucho Marx
The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.    William James
Liberty is being free from the things we don't like in order to be slaves to the things we do like.    Ernest Benn
I have learnt silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers.    Kahlil Gibran
A committee is a life form with six or more legs and no brain.
Republicans study the financial pages of the newspaper. Democrats put them in the bottom of the bird cage.
I'm interested in the fact that the less secure a man is, the more likely he is to have extreme prejudice.    Clint Eastwood
There is nothing more exhilarating than to be shot at without result.    Winston Churchill
I believe that in the end the truth will conquer.    John Wycliffe
Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.    George S. Patton
Many of the truths we cling to depend greatly upon our own point of view.    Obi-Wan Kenobi in "Return of the Jedi"
I wish I'd drunk more champagne.    John Maynard Keynes
A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.    Pope
Plain women know more about men than beautiful ones do. But beautiful women don't need to know about men. It's the men who have to know about beautiful women.    Katherine Hepburn
The government of the United States is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion.    George Washington
Jimmy Carter says the GOP Convention was "a debacle." What did he expect -- a helicopter rescue mission?    National Review
Jimmy Carter says the GOP Convention was "a debacle." That's French for Trust Me.    National Review
The caribou love [the Alaska oil pipeline]. They rub up against it, and they have babies.    George Bush
One half of the children born die before their eighth year. This is nature's law; why try to contradict it?    Jean Jacques Rousseau
Being frustrated is disagreeable, but the real disasters in life begin when you get what you want.    Irving Kristol
Forecasting is very difficult, especially if it's about the future.    Edgar R. Fiedler
I never met a man I didn't like.    Will Rogers
A man will fight harder for his interests than for his rights.    Napoleon
The more laws and order are made prominent, the more thieves and robbers there will be.    Lao Tsu
There is growing evidence that smoking has pharamacological ... effects that are of real value to smokers.    Joseph F. Cullman III (Pres. of Phillip Morris)
I have nothing to hide.    Richard Nixon
God has been replaced, as he has all over the West, with respectability and air conditioning.    Imamu Amiri Baraka
One was never married, and that's his hell; another is, and that's his plague.    Robert Burton
If Noah had consulted with modern-day weather forecasters, there would have been a ten-percent chance of him building the ark.    Jim Fiebig
I don't need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better.    Plutarch
Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.    Laurence Peter
Is not life a hundred times too short for us to bore ourselves?    Friedrich Nietzsche
We have a complicated three-way conundrum at this point.    George Bush
Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book.    Ronald Reagan
Abortion is advocated only by persons who have themselves been born.    Ronald Reagan
All progress is based on a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income.    Samuel Butler
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will eat for the rest of his life.
After all is said and done, a hell of a lot more is said than done.
The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.    Hubert H. Humphrey
A mind once stretched by a new idea never regains its original dimension.    Oliver Wendell Holmes
One thing that helped Rip Van Winkle sleep for 20 years was the fact that none of his neighbors owned power lawn mowers.
The death of democracy is not likely to be an assassination from ambush. It will be a slow extinction from apathy, indifference, and undernourishment.    Robert Hutchins
Who would have predicted... that Dubcek, who brought the tanks into Czechoslovakia in 1968 is now being proclaimed a hero in Czechoslovakia. Unbelievable.    J. Danforth Quayle
Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next.    Franklin P. Jones
Management will select actions or events and convert them to crises. It will then over-react.    Gene Franklin
Auditors always reject a newsman's expense account with a bottom line divisible by 5 or 10.
Diplomats and bureaucrats may function differently, but they achieve exactly the same results.    Spock
America is the only country left where we teach languages so that no pupil can speak them.    John Erskine
Anyone can hate. It costs to love.    John Williamson
I claim not to have controlled events, but confess plainly that events have controlled me.    Abraham Lincoln
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.    Albert Einstein
A technique is a trick that works.    Gian-Carlo Rota
Progress might be a circle, rather than a straight line.    Eberhard Zeidler
Like other occult techniques of divination, the statistical method has a private jargon deliberately contrived to obscure its methods from non-practitioners. -- G. O. Ashley
In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play.    Friedrich Nietzsche
What is an adult? A child blown up by age.    Simone de Beauvoir
I am not a crook.    Richard M. Nixon
Politics are very much like war. We may even have to use poison gas at times.    Winston Churchill
As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being.    Carl G. Jung
Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.    Kin Hubbard
Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.
$100 placed at 7 percent interest compounded quarterly for 200 years will increase to more than $100,000,000 -- by which time it will be worth nothing.    Lazarus Long
God does not play dice.    Albert Einstein
We love your adherence to democratic principles.    George Bush speaking to Ferdinand Marcos
We cannot put the face of a person on a stamp unless said person is deceased. My suggestion, therefore, is that you drop dead.    James E. Day, Postmaster General
A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.    Aesop
Unemployment insurance is a pre-paid vacation for freeloaders.    Ronald Reagan
There is only one success, to be able to spend your life in your own way.    Christopher Morley
Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies.    Gore Vidal
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.    Earl Wilson
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.    Oscar Wilde
Any philosophy that can be put in a nutshell belongs there.    Sydney J. Harris
The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one.    Albert Einstein
It is long accepted by the missionaries that morality is inversely proportional to the amount of clothing people wore.    Alex Carey
Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the support of Paul.    George Bernard Shaw
If little else, the brain is an educational toy.    Tom Robbins
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.    Groucho Marx
To be loved, be lovable.    Ovid
Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory.    John Kenneth Galbraith
There's no sense in being precise when you don't even know what you're talking about.    John von Neumann
There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.    Doctor Who
And which of you by being anxious can add a single cubit to his life's span?    Matthew 6:27
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.    Will Rogers
A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world.    George Santayana
Your ambushes would be more successful if you bathed more often.    Worf
Power always has to be kept in check; power exercised in secret, especially under the cloak of national security, is doubly dangerous.    William Proxmire
Everything that can be invented has been invented.    Charles H. Duell
A school should not be a preparation for life. A school should be life.    Elbert Hubbard
One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Vice President, and that one word is 'to be prepared'.    J. Danforth Quayle
Humans do have an amazing capacity for believing what they choose -- and excluding that which is painful.    Spock
The ignorant man always adores what he cannot understand.    Cesare Lombroso
In unanimity there may well be either cowardice or uncritical thinking.    Donald Rumsfeld
Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.    Wilson Mizner
Not only does God play dice, but ... he sometimes throws them where they cannot be seen.    Stephen Hawking
It isn't what they say about you, it's what they whisper.    Errol Flynn
In these times you have to be an optimist to open your eyes when you awake in the morning.    Carl Sandburg
They talk most who have the least to say.    Matthew Prior
Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket.    George Orwell
I could prove God statistically.    George Gallup
I improve on misquotation.    Cary Grant
The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.    Mark Twain
Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.    Norman Cousins
When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.    Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.    Mark Twain
Experience is not what happens to you. It is what you do with what happens to you.    Aldous Huxley
Experience is not what happens to you, it is what you do with what happens to you.    Aldous Huxley
For every proverb that confidently asserts its little bit of wisdom, there is usually an equal and opposite proverb that contradicts it.    Richard Boston
Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing.    Werner von Braun
Almost anything is easier to get into than out of.    Agnes Allen
Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth.    Lillian Hellman
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.    Clarence Darrow
Some men see things as they are and say why? I dream things that never were and say 'Why not?'    Robert F. Kennedy
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else.    Will Rogers
Lack of will power has caused more failure than lack of intelligence or ability.    Flower A. Newhouse
Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.    Mark Twain
After a raise in salary you will have less money at the end of each month than you had before.    Dr. R. F. Gumperson
Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable.    John Kenneth Galbraith
A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece.    Ludwig Erhard
All wars are civil wars, because all men are brothers ... Each one owes infinitely more to the human race than to the particular country in which he was born.    Francois Fenelon
When the rich make war it's the poor that die.    Jean-Paul Sartre
You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signls here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.    Albert Einstein
The atom bomb is a paper tiger... Terrible to look at but not so strong as it seems.    Mao Zedong
Never decide to buy anything while listening to the salesman.    Edmund C. Berkeley
If you want to kill any idea in the world today, get a committee working on it.    Charles F. Kettering
The organization of any bureaucracy is very much like a septic tank -- the really big chunks always rise to the top.    Professor John Imhoff
Marriage must incessantly contend with a monster that devours everything: familiarity.    Honore de Balzac
Democrats make up plans and then do something else. Republicans follow the plans their grandfathers made.
Maybe this world is another planet's Hell.    Aldous Huxley
Lonely men seek companionship. Lonely women sit at home and wait. They never meet.
Ask five economists and you'll get five different explanations (six if one went to Harvard).    Edgar R. Fiedler
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems. They think you are a sucker.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.    Arthur C. Clarke
For 40 years I have analyzed stocks and other money markets. Now I have made a remarkable discovery. The Confederate dollar has risen in value 7.4 percent a year since 1965. It has outperformed the German mark, the Japanese yen and the Swiss franc.    Vincent W. Allen
A reactionary is a man whose political opinions always manage to keep up with yesterday.
I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.    J. Danforth Quayle
He who awaits much can expect little.    Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best.    Woody Allen
All government programs have three things in common: a beginning, a muddle, and no end.
Give a small boy a hammer and he will find that everything he encounters needs pounding.    Abraham Kaplan
So much of what we call management consists in making it difficult for people to work.
[Feminism is] a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.    Pat Robertson
Committee reports dealing with wages, salaries, fringe benefits, facilities, computers, employee parking, libraries, coffee breaks, secretarial support, etc., always call for dramatic expenditure increases.    Thomas L. Martin
Where all men think alike, no one thinks very much.    Walter Lippmann
Belladonna, n. In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.    Ambrose Bierce
I am not senile.    Ronald W. Reagan
Man is the only animal that contemplates death, and also the only animal that shows any sign of doubt of its finality.    William Ernest Hocking
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.    Mark Twain
There are two cardinal sins from which all the others spring: impatience and laziness.    Franz Kafka
Any argument worth making within the bureaucracy must be capable of being expressed in a single declarative sentence that is obviously true once stated.    John McNaughton
He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.
Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.    Howard W. Newton
The income tax has make more liars out of the American people than golf has.    Will Rogers
Administration maintains the status quo.    Thomas L. Martin
Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside equally desperate to get out.    Michel Eyquem de Montaigne
If you're confident after you've just finished an exam, it's because you don't know enough to know better.    Jay Weisman
To profit from good advice requires as much wisdom as to give it.
How do you spot a leader? They come in all ages, shapes and conditions. Some are poor administrators, some are not overly bright. One clue: the true leader can be recognized because somehow his people consistently turn in superior performances.    Robert Townsend
Dialogue: opposing factions discussing relevant issues. Formerly called an argument.    Paul Sweeney
Gosh that takes me back... or is it forward? That's the trouble with time travel, you never can tell.    Doctor Who
College isn't the place to go for ideas.    Hellen Keller
A politician always abuses his own constituency and placates the opponent's.    Bob Smith
It is the height of absurdity to sow little but weeds in the first half of one's lifetime and expect to harvest a valuable crop in the second half.    Percy Johnston
The economy depends about as much on economists as the weather does on weather forecasters.    Jean-Paul Kauffmann
Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.    Tom Gibb
In a museum in Havana, there are two skulls of Christopher Columbus, "one when he was a boy and one when he was a man."    Mark Twain
Hitch your wagon to a star.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
In the final choice a soldier's pack is not so heavy as a prisoner's chains.    Dwight D. Eisenhower
A community is like a ship; everyone ought to be prepared to take the helm.    Henrik Ibsen
A weak mind is like a microscope, which magnifies trifling things, but cannot receive great ones.    Chesterfield
A hungry man is not a free man.    Adlai Stevenson
The chief defect of a democracy is that only the political party out of office knows how to run the government.
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.    Will Rogers
Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.    Aaron Levenstein
The final lesson of Viet Nam is that no great nation can long afford to be sundered by a memory.    George Bush
Yet [white] men [of South Africa] were afraid, with a fear that was deep, deep in the heart, a fear so deep that they hid their kindness, ... They were afraid because they were so few. And fear could not be cast out, but by love.    Alan Paton
The people here [in Nicaragua] are amazingly friendly, when you figure we're here to overthrow their government.    Richard Melton
It's rural America. It's where I came from. We always refer to ourselves as real America. Rural America, real America, real, real, America.    J. Danforth Quayle
Avoid strong drink. It makes you shoot at IRS agents -- and miss.    Lazarus Long
Fortune is a woman. It is necessary, if you wish to master her, to take her by force before she has a chance to resist.    Niccolo Machiavelli
Every Tom, Dick and Harry is named William.    Sam Goldwyn
I am the future!    J. Danforth Quayle
The big majority of Americans, who are comparatively well off, have developed an ability to have enclaves of people living in the greatest misery without almost noticing them.    Gunnar Myrdal
Every child born in America can hope to grow up to enjoy tax loopholes.
A woman is a woman. A good cigar is a smoke.    Rudyard Kipling
Hindsight is always 20:20.    Billy Wilder
I think [a black] ... could scarcely be found capable of tracing and comprehending the investigations of Euclid.    Thomas Jefferson
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.    Mark Twain
Money is like manure. If you spread it around, it does a lot of good. But if you pile it up in one place, it stinks like hell.    Clint Murchison, Jr.
I walked in a desert. And I cried, "Ah, God, take me from this place!" A voice said, "It is no desert." I cried, "Well, but--- "The sand, the heat, the vacant horizon." A voice said, "It is no desert."    Stephan Crane
I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their jobs.    Samuel Goldwyn
The good die young -- because they see it's no use living if you've got to be good.
Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind.    Rudyard Kipling
Love built on beauty, soon as beauty dies.    John Donne
Examine the contents, not the bottle.    The Talmud
I reject get-it-done, make-it-happen thinking. I want to slow things down so I understand them better.    Governor Jerry Brown
Commonly, physicians, like beer, are best when they are old, and lawyers, like bread, when they are young and new.    Fuller
If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.    Voltaire
The woods are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep.    Robert Frost
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.    Mark Twain
Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, 'She doesn't have what it takes.' They will say, 'Women don't have what it takes.'    Clare Boothe Luce
If your parents didn't have any children, there's a good chance you won't have any.    Clarence Day
Credulity is the man's weakness, but the child's strength.    Charles Lamb
The sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick.
"I must do something" will always solve more problems than "Something must be done."
What we call "morals" is simply blind obedience to words of command.    Havelock Ellis
"As a matter of fact" is an expression that precedes many an expression that isn't.
Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavour of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks.    Lazarus Long
You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.    Mark Twain
I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.    Voltaire
Some people who slap you on the back are trying to help you swallow what they just told you.
In the fight between you and the world, back the world.    Franz Kafka
Democrats give their worn-out clothes to those less fortunate. Republicans wear theirs.
If it takes a lot of words to say what you have in mind, give it more thought.    Dennis Roch
Man does not live by words alone, despite the fact that sometimes he has to eat them.    Adlai Stevenson
A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him, I may think aloud.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them.    Robert Frost
Be tolerant of those who disagree with you -- after all, they have a right to their ridiculous opinions.
He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches.    George Bernard Shaw
An expert is someone who can take something you already knew and make it sound confusing.
We always love those who admire us, but we do not always love those whom we admire.    Francois
Don't ask the barber whether you need a haircut.    Daniel S. Greenberg
A meeting is a place where people get together to talk about what they should be doing.
A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, will tell you.    Bert Taylor
Humor is laughing at what you haven't got when you ought to have it.    Langston Hughes
It is better to take what does not belong to you than to let it lie around neglected.    Mark Twain
All's well that ends well.
I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.    Albert Einstein
Art is I; science is we.    Claude Bernard
If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.    J. Danforth Quayle
Habit is the easiest way to be wrong again.
We don't know who it was that discovered water, but we're pretty sure it wasn't a fish.    Marshall McLuhan
Most plain girls are virtuous because of the scarcity of opportunity to be otherwise.    Maya Angelou
Growing and decaying vegetation in this land are responsible for 93 percent of the oxides of nitrogen.    Ronald Reagan
Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts - for support rather than illumination.
Age is not important unless you're a cheese.    Helen Hayes
We are ready for any unforseen event which may or may not occur.    J. Danforth Quayle
Never go to sea with two chronometers; take one or three.
No science is immune to the infection of politics and the corruption of power.    Jacob Bronowski
It's no exaggeration to say the undecideds could go one way or another.    George Bush
Time is flying never to return.    Vergil
History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.    Winston Churchill
There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, hire someone, or forbid your kids to do it.    Monta Crane
My responsibility is to follow the Scriptures which call upon us to occupy the land until Jesus returns.    James Watt
To light a candle is to cast a shadow.    Ursula K. Le Guin
Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
War is delightful to those who have had no experience of it.    Desiderius Erasmus
There are people who think that honesty is always the best policy. This is a superstition; there are times when the appearance of it is worth six of it.    Mark Twain
The most distressing thing that can happen to a prophet is to be proved wrong. The next most distressing thing is to be proved right.    Aldous Huxley
If A equals success, then the formula is A = X + Y + Z. X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut.    Albert Einstein
The strongest man in the world is he who stands most alone.    Henrik Ibsen
The paper burns, but the words fly away.    Ben Joseph Akiba
Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth.    Muhammad Ali
The truth is, all of the nuclear waste now on hand and yet to be accumulated between now and the year 2000, could be stacked on a single football field and the stack would only be six feet high.    Ronald Reagan
Academic politics is the most vicious and bitter form of politics, because the stakes are so low.    Wallace Sayre
Assuming that either the left wing or the right wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.    Pat Paulsen
I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.    Thomas Jefferson
A dress that zips up the back will bring a husband and wife together.    James H. Boren
The scientists split the atom; now the atom is splitting us.    Quentin Reynolds
History has shown us that strength may be useless when faced with terrorism.    Jean-Luc Picard
an optimist is a guy that has never had much experience    Donald R. Perry Marquis
My favorite piece of technical writing: Assembly of Japanese bicycle require great peace of mind.    Robert Pirsig
Experience is a dear teacher, but fools will learn at no other.    Benjamin Franklin
I see a good deal of talk from Washington about lowering taxes. I hope they do get 'em lowered enough so people can afford to pay 'em.    Will Rogers
Always rise from the table with an appetite, and you will never sit down without one.    William Penn
In a fight you don't stop to choose your cudgels.    Nikita Khruschev
All is flux, nothing stays still.    Heraclitus
The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from.    Andrew S. Tanenbaum
It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.    James Thurber
I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.    Samuel Goldwyn
A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience.    Miguel de Cervantes
A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience.
Mathematics gets its semblance of reality by never saying what it is talking about.    Bertrand Russell
Experience is a good school, but the fees are high.    Heinrich Heine
Democracy is good. I say this because other systems are worse.    Jawaharlal Nehru
If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want anything done, ask a woman.    Margaret Thatcher
Insisting on perfect safety is for people who don't have the balls to live in the real world.    Mary Shafer
Having two bathrooms ruined the capacity to co-operate.    Margaret Mead
Lack of money is the root of all evil.    George Bernard Shaw
If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive.    Samuel Goldwyn
If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive!    Samuel Goldwyn
Although in public I refer to him as Mr. Vice President, in private I call him George ... When I called him on the phone yesterday, I called him George rather than Mr. Vice President. But in public, it's Mr. Vice President because that's who he is.    J. Danforth Quayle
Nothing ever becomes real till it is experienced.    John Keats
The trouble with the rat-race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.    Lily Tomlin
El amor es un camino que de repente aparece y de tanto caminarlo se te pierde.    Victor Jara
Who will protect the public when the police violate the law?    Ramsey Clark
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.    Samuel Goldwyn
Democracy is finding proximate solutions to insoluble problems.    Reinhold Niebuhr
I am not part of the problem; I am a Republican.    J. Danforth Quayle
When I was young, my position [on churches] was: dynamite. It was only later that I realized that this sort of thing cannot be rushed. It must rot away like a diseased member.    Adolf Hitler
Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig.
The most egotistical person we've ever heard of is the one who remarked that he had only been wrong once in his life and that was when he thought he was wrong but wasn't.
The world is full of people whose notion of a satisfactory future is, in fact, a return to the idealised past.    Robertson Davies
You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.    Abraham Lincoln
Half of the American people never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half.    Gore Vidal
I still believe that people are really good at heart. I simply can't build up my hopes on a foundation consisting of confusion, misery and death.    Anne Frank
We are going to have peace even if we have to fight for it.    Dwight D. Eisenhower
A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.    John M. Dyer
Politics power grows out of the barrel of a gun.    Mao Zedong
Approximately 80% of our air pollution stems from hydrocarbons released by vegetation. So let's not go overboard in setting and enforcing tough emissions standards for man-made sources.    Ronald Reagan
If all men knew what others say of them, there would not be four friends in the world.    Blaise Pascal
I am not an Athenian or a Greek, but a citizen of the world.    Socrates
Loyalty to petrified opinion never broke a chain or freed a human soul.    Mark Twain
Impossible is a word only to be found in the dictionary of fools.    Napoleon Bonaparte
Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid.    Franklin P. Jones
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.
To think contrary to one's era is heroism. But to speak against it is madness.    Eugene Ionesco
We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.    Epictetus
There is no security on this earth, there is only opportunity.    General Douglas MacArthur
I've spent a fortune on my kids' education, and a fortune on their teeth. The difference is, they use their teeth.    Robert Orben
Committee -- a group of the unfit, appointed by the unwilling, to do the unnecessary.    Stewart Harrol
The first 90 percent of the task takes 90 percent of the time, the last 10 percent takes the other 90 percent.
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!" till you can find a rock.    Wynn Catlin
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!" till you can find a rock.
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.    Salvor Hardin
Committee -- a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done.    Fred Allen
Time is Nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.    Woody Allen
Habit is the nursery of errors.    Victor Hugo
Practice is the best of all instructors.    Publilius Syrus
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.    Martin Luther King
My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.    Albert Einstein
Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.    John F. Kennedy
Give your decisions, never your reasons; your decisions may be right, your reasons are sure to be wrong.    Earl of Mansfild
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.    Henry David Thoreau
In any country there must be people who have to die. They are the sacrifices any nation has to make to achieve law and order.    Idi Amin Dada
The Communist system must be based on the will of the people, and if the people should not want that system, then that people should establish a different system.    Nikita S. Krushchev
Repentance is not so much remorse for what we have done as the fear of the consequences.    Francois
An inexorable upward movement leads administrators to higher salaries and narrower spans of control.    David Riesman
They that govern the most make the least noise.    John Seldon
The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.    H. L. Mencken
Be sure to save your money; you never know when it might be worth something again.
Neither soldiers nor money can defend a king but only friends won by good deeds, merit, and honesty.    Sallust
To be great is to be misunderstood.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
Youth is a period of missed opportunities.    Cyril Connolly
A man feared that he might find an assassin; Another that he might find a victim. One was more wise than the other.    Stephan Crane
May the road rise to meet you May the winds be always at your back May the sun shine warm upon your face May the rains fall softly upon your fields And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of his hand.    traditional Irish Blessing
Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.    Joseph Heller
No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate one and love the other, or he will hold to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and riches.    Matthew 6:24
Every person who has mastered a profession is a skeptic concerning it.    George Bernard Shaw
A tree's a tree. How many more do you need to look at?    Ronald Reagan
There are really not many jobs that actually require a penis or a vagina, and all other occupations should be open to everyone.    Gloria Steinem
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.    John 15:13
We have the power to make this the best generation of mankind in the history of the world - or to make it the last.    John F. Kennedy
Ten people who speak make more noise than ten thousand who are silent.    Napoleon
A mathematician is a machine for turning coffee into theorems.    Paul Erdos
It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that it is more difficult to be witty every day than to say pretty things from time to time.    Honore de Balzac
Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor, unassisted.    Wilson Mizner
Be content with your lot; one cannot be first in everything.    Aesop
The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.    Henry David Thoreau
Every man desires to live long, but no man desires to be old.    Jonathon Swift
If you actually look like your passport photo, you aren't well enough to travel.
Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough to think it's important.    Eugene McCarthy
Public office is the last refuge of a scoundrel.    Boies Penrose
A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.    Oscar Wilde
An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less.    Nicholas Murray Butler
Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance.    Confucius
Most people wouldn't know music if it came up and bit them on the ass.    Frank Zappa
Not-really-trying is just as much effort as trying-really-hard. The only difference ... is that not-really-trying receives no reward.    A. N. Wilson
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.    Sigmund Freud
A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.    Dwight D. Eisenhower
The devil made me do it.    Flip Wilson
Good art is not what it looks like, but what it does to us.    Roy Adzak
In times like these, it is helpful to remember that there have always been times like these.    Paul Harvey
Voters do not decide issues. They decide *who* will decide issues.    George F. Will
To fall into a habit is to begin to cease to be.    Miguel de Unamuno
Beauty without grace is the hook without the bait.    Ralph Waldo Emerson
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.    Psalms 111:10
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.    Proverbs 1:7
Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts.    Henry Adams
An honest politician is one who when he is bought will stay bought.    Simon Cameron
Our major obligation is not to mistake slogans for solutions.    Edward R. Murrow
This isn't a man who is leaving with his head between his legs.    J. Danforth Quayle
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.    Ellen Parr
The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.    W. Somerset Maugham
A myth is a religion in which no one any longer believes.    James Feibleman
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
The streets are safe in Philadelphia, it's only the people who make them unsafe.    Frank Rizzo
A camel looks like a horse that was planned by a committee.    Vogue Magazine
A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew.    Herb Caen
The best of seers is he who guesses well.    Euripides
I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country.    Nathan Hale
A free people always has the right to dismiss its rulers -- whom it regards as its servants -- at any time.    Harry V. Jaffa
Everything beautiful has its moment and then passes away.    Luis Cernuda
Any man can prove he has good judgement by saying you have.
It is only when they go wrong that machines remind you how powerful they are.    Clive James
He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap.
I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.    Albert Einstein
Good judgement comes from experience. And experience -- well that comes from having bad judgement.
Friends may come and friends may go, but enemies accumulate.    Dr. Thomas Jones
Leisure time is that five or six hours when you sleep at night.    George Allen
Most of us spend the first 6 days of each week sowing wild oats, then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.    Fred Allen
All you need to grow fine vigorous grass is a crack in your sidewalk.
Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.    William Butler Yeats
Beware of people who fall at your feet. They may be reaching for the corner of the rug.
At some point, every faculty would certainly lynch its dean -- if it could only agree on a date.
People don't ask for facts in making up their minds. They would rather have one good, soul-satisfying emotion than a dozen facts.    Robert Keith Leavitt
Comment is free, but facts are sacred.    C. P. Scott
Assassination is the extreme form of censorship.    George Bernard Shaw
Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.    Polish proverb
Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.
In every country and every age, the priest has been hostile to Liberty.    Thomas Jefferson
All bridge hands are equally likely, but some are more equally likely than others.    Alan Truscott
SUCCESS: Living long enough to be a burden on your children.
Some actions have an end but no beginning; some begin but do not end. It all depends upon where the observer is standing.    Frank Herbert
Scrubbing floors and emptying bedpans has as much dignity as the Presidency.    Richard Nixon
In a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.    Laurence Peter
They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist---    General John B. Sedgwick
Whenever you have an efficient government you have a dictatorship.    Harry S. Truman
I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.    Wilson Mizner
He has half the deed done who has made a beginning.    Horace
What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.    Confucius
Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.    Fran Lebowitz
Strength lies not in defense but in attack.    Adolf Hitler
Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.    John G. Pollard
The past is the only dead thing that smells sweet.    Cyril Connolly
Your President is no crook!    Richard Nixon
In an underdeveloped country, don't drink the water; in a developed country, don't breathe the air.
A reformer wants his conscience to be your guide.
The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant -- and let the air out of the tires.    Dorothy Parker
Do not handicap your children by making their lives easy.    Lazarus Long
The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries.    Winston Churchill
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.    Winston Churchill
Never eat at a place called Mom's. Never play cards with a man named Doc. And never lie down with a woman who's got more trouble than you.    Nelson Algren
Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.    Ambrose Bierce
Laws were made to be broken.    Christopher North
There's a difference between beauty and charm. A beautiful woman is one I notice. A charming woman is one who notices me.    John Erskine
There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.    Charles M. Schulz
Washington is a much better place if you are asking questions rather than answering them.    John Dean
Diplomacy has rarely been able to gain at the conference table what cannot be gained or held on the battlefield.
Good people are good because they've come to wisdom through failure.    William Saroyan
The less a thing can be proved, the angrier we get when we argue about it.
Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other.    Ronald Reagan
Congressmen serve an average of twenty years. Murderers serve an average of three years. We've got this backwards.    Oliver North
One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if possible, speak a few reasonable words.    Goethe
Everything should be as simple as possible, but no simpler.    Albert Einstein
Everything should be as simple as possible -- but not simpler.    Albert Einstein
The sun and the moon and the stars would have disappeared long ago... had they happened to be within the reach of predatory human hands.    Havelock Ellis
Everyone has his day and some days last longer than others.    Winston Churchill
If you pick up a dog and make him prosper he will not bite you. This is the basic difference between dogs and humans.    Mark Twain
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.    Euripides
One must deal openly and fairly with one's forces if maximum effectiveness is to be achieved.    Lord Darth Vader
The chief product of an automated society is a widespread and deepening sense of boredom.    Cyril Parkinson
On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.    Avery
In films murders are always very clean. I show how difficult it is and what a messy thing it is to kill a man.    Alfred Hitchcock
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.    Mae West
Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.    Horace
Ability is of little account without opportunity.    Napoleon Bonaparte
Relations are simply a tedious pack of people, who haven't got the remotest knowledge of how to live, nor the smallest instinct about when to die.    Oscar Wilde
The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but hold hands.    Alexander Penney
A little learning is a dangerous thing!    Alexander Pope
One's company, two's a crowd and three's a party.    Andy Warhol
The speed of exit of a civil servant is directly proportional to the quality of his service.    Ralph Nader
A statue lies hid in a block of marble; and the art of the statuary only clears away the superfluous matter, and removes the rubbish.    Addison
Most of the problems a President has to face have their roots in the past.    Harry S. Truman
God forgives us. ... Who am I not to forgive?    Alan Paton
Get a shot off FAST! This upsets him long enough to let you make your second shot perfect.    Lazarus Long
Someone has compared Southern California to a granola cereal; when you take away the fruits and the nuts, all you have left are the flakes.
The Law of Raspberry Jam - The wider any culture is spread, the thinner it gets.    Alvin Toffler
I like thinking big. If you're going to be thinking anything, you might as well think big.    Donald Trump
It's round the world I've traveled; it's round the world I've roamed; but I've yet to see an outlaw drive a family from its home.    Woody Guthrie
If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.    Albert Einstein
I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.    Confucius
Government spending? I don't know what it's all about. I don't know any more about this thing than an economist does, and, God knows, he doesn't know much.    Will Rogers
Bartz's Law of Hokey Horsepuckery: The more ridiculous a belief system, the higher the probability of its success.    Wayne R. Bartz
Learn to be sincere. Even if you have to fake it.    Solomon Short
Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts.    J. Danforth Quayle
The real question of 1988 is whether we're going to go forward to tomorrow or past to the -- to the back!    J. Danforth Quayle
Crazy way to travel.  Spreading a man's molecules all over the universe.    Leonard McCoy