modiromppu/modiromppu.iso/DEMOS/RC-OCEAN.ZIP/OCEAN.TXT

Text File | 1997-02-28 | 13KB | 307 lines

Note: please enter a cubic player shell playing some whacko module like
      "alhamar.xm", "kolia.xm" or "load2.xm". This is required for
      entering the correct state of mind relevant to rC info files.


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                    [} real rECTUM cAUDA in 64 kilobytes {]



 rECTUM cAUDA of 1997
 rECTUM cAUDA *in the year of* 1997

 rECTUM cAUDA is going online
 rECTUM cAUDA is taking over

 rECTUM cAUDA 14tiss Stavanger Section is acquiring world fisse
 rECTUM cAUDA *STAVANGER SECTION*  - the section with the insane info files!


 rECTUM cAUDA would very much like to win this compo so vote if you want us to,
 or vote if you think we're seriously skilled! Of course, you can vote
 if you're drunk, absent, eating pizza, or coding vectors too! Heck,
 you may even vote if you just feel like it! Do it! We need the cash!


 ─────────────────────────────────────────────
     [ glossary ]

 Ocean
     [òu`shje:n,]

 Once upon a time a feta games company rocking the C64. Happened to use
 their loader music in every production released. What if rECTUM cAUDA
 was to use exactly the one same single module in all demos?

 Loader
     [lφ:uda]

 Thing invented to be able to reproduce certain bits of computer memory,
 and also to be able to retreive previously stored data.
    The C64 featured a turbo load speed of 3000 baud. Now you could
 get the program faster into RAM by downloading it. So keep downloading
 rECTUM cAUDA demos!
    Loaders usually had a picture being displayed pixel for pixel,
 just like Windows 95 is redrawing your wallpaper. This is the exact
 same effect. That's one of the reasons why MIcrosoft should be sued for
 breach of copyright laws. Pixel-by-pixel was Ocean's trademark!
    THe loaders also incorporated a great, wonderful, extacy-ish effect
 on the overscan borders, which was some kind of palette animation, only that
 it wasn't. So it's a wonder that Piffi managed to reproduce this effect
 on the PC. Please take a moment and think about this extreme skill feat of
 coding. Notice that the PC version also features loading borders on the
 *overscan* on PC MONITORS! (That's one of the reasons why you should vote
 for this one).

 64k ram system
    [sikz'ti få:r kei rauhelvetefaensadopornofitte si:s'tm]

 A feature of the C64 to store music, pictures and general porn code.
 Strangely enough this is also the size limit for this intro.

 Scroller
    ['zkrå:å:å:å:ålla'h]

 A phenomen deeply related to old days of C64, while men still were boys
 and monitors were TVs. Moving text one pixel at a time was still
 a girl-attractive thing to do. The code applied for the 100% IBM
 PC Compatible version found inside these binaries are based on code
 previously released inside binaries of the Volvo #2 intro, but modified
 for additional compability and general havoc.


 ─────────────────────────────────────────────
    [ rECTUM cAUDA  - we're the real ravers! ]

 rECTUM cAUDA just realized that to enhance the internationatility
 of our demos and presentations and pictures, we have to translate some
 of the better expressions to english. We really hope that the
 reviewers at ftp.hornet.org reads this text, and that they suddenly
 realize what the fuss is all about. Can we bet on a ***** out of ***** this
 time? yes please thank you very much.

 Before we go to any extent of this you-smell-like-a-hamster game,
 don't forget that no Norwegian demo group have had more appearances
 on television than rECTUM cAUDA. Therefore rECTUM cAUDA is the leading
 group in Scandinavia. No other demo group has received as much publicity
 as rECTUM cAUDA. Thanks to dYne we also made it to the standard jingle
 music theme on Spider, where the TV dudes and dudettes are more roached
 than ever.

 For an in-depth analysis and explanation of roaching, we refer to
 Volvo #1 & #2 and Subkult issue 1, 2, 3 or 4. Can't remember.
  (note! Dr. Dyregod & Ko is in no way infiltrated or involved with rECTUM
    cAUDA, they just happen to make a helluva good diskmag. Now can we
    please have issue #5?)

 For an in-depth analysis and explanation of HINDUS in general, please
 read these laws of nature:

   1. rECTUM cAUDA dominates the universe and no corresponance should
       be entered into.

   2. Piffi and sTOR hAMZTER is the leading gods of rECTUM cAUDA,
       as far as this release is concerned.

   3. Why do I have to type alt-21 to get the ""? Doesn't my keyboard
       work at all?

     3.1  Your keyboard doesn't work at all if you don't have one
           (see also: 12 - About Latex and other circumstances)

   4. Hindus are cool people. That's why we focus so much on them.

   5. Some people think they can kick whoever they want outta rECTUM cAUDA.

     5.1 (rc-ting.zip has proven otherwise)

   6. Sand is supposed to be serious. Really! (x)

   7. Hole Inga once was a hindu. Now he works in a shop in Kazhacstan

   8. rECTUM cAUDA is latin for... five hindus in a bus. or not.
        (actually I think you know the real answer yourself)

   9. Hindus speak incomprehensible words like "arhmahl ahkballah aloha".

  10. 80x50 is a cool textmode

  11. Never buy pizza without scaring the pizza deliverance kid.

  12. Latex once lacked a keyboard too much. Thus he became the
       flashlight main focus of the Norwegian demo scene for quite a while.

      12.1 (never forget your keyboard or mice, or no pizza available)

  13. rECTUM cAUDA does not contain any gamerlamers.

  14. rECTUM cAUDA will OWN the world by year 2057 A.D.

  15. The approaching end of the universe will boldly begin
       deep in a jungle not far from Papa New Guinea.


──────────────────────────────────────────────
       [ Casio Color Power Graphics Calculator ]


  Why don't you fuuukin buy a Casio Color Power Graphics Calculator?
  Look at all those features: (they'd knock a C64 down back into it's
  shallow grave)
     * Screen Shot printing with CASIO Label Printer.

           [ every businessman on the road requires a PrtScr button
           for their local calculator, in case they cannot remember their
           cash flow ]

     * Impression de l'image sur ècran avec une imprimante d'ètiquettes CASIO

           [ to Piffi's extent of French knowledge, this might as well
             mean the same as "vålevå kosje avekk moa såsoa" ]

     * 3 color display (orange, blue and green)
     * graphics functions
     * Large display (16col x 8line, 96x64 dots)

           [ they've even got better resolution than the PC's textmode.
             Scrap your PC. Get this. ]

     * 32-kbyte memory (24.000 program bytes)

           [ weird.. if you erase predefined graphs, you're left
             with more than 24.000 bytes mem. If you reset the
             calculator, the predefined graphs return. This means they
             must be stored in ROM, then copied into RAM and wasting
             precious space. Wonder what is copied into the other 8kbs
             of RAM. Note: THE CASIO 9800 (according to this) FEATURES
             BIOS / DATA  ROM *SHADOWING*!  Go fuuuuuk your newly-bought
             AWARD PnP BIOS, this is the *REAL* state of the art of
             advanced memory enhancement techniques. Guess they use EDO
             ram for storing variables. ]

     * Simultaneous equations

           [ True multitasking. Not pseudo-crashing as in windows 95.
             This is a REAL OS! ]

     * Polynomial equations
     * Differentials
     * Matrix Calculations

           [ go ahead, make your own 3d engine with hardware
             matrix calculation! ]

     * Standard deviations
     * Regression analysis

     (then there's a lot of BULLSKITT on French that I don't understand
      BULLSKITT of, perhaps they describe what they'll have for dinner or
      something, or it might just be a translation of the English
      part just above...)



     This' gotta be a dream to code on. Too bad the buttons are so small.

   [ note: this is what piffi is put up with for 3 years of maths class
     at school. Perhaps this is another obvious reason for rC's wide
     appeal in Stavanger. ]


──────────────────────────────────────────────
       [ about this release ]

  Code........... Piffi!
  Sound.......... sTOR hAMZTER!
  Gfx............ www.waku.com, piffi
  Loading border palette................. Piffi!
  Loading border alignment............... Piffi, Den Store Elgen, sTOR hAMZTER!
  Info file ............................. Piffi.

  Thanks to Piffi for the hyper-elite 8bit to 1bit compression algorithm
  and converter. Special thanks to Piffi for the extremely elite
  decompression algorithm that misses by about 8 bytes in the beginning.
  Extremely many thanks to the Gathering 97 organizers for
  keeping consistant rules throughout the entire preproduction time.

PiffiKodii says:
  Originally I reached a filesize of 65539 bytes (3 bytes too much...),
  after all the code was greatly optimized for size. Finally
  I managed to stay below the magic limit by compressing the
  dos *extender* with a different program. If I'll release a final
  version, I guess it'll grow a LOT due to a simple change of player.
  Ahh.. my ocean/ directory contains 2.8 mb of files. Tralala so happy
  to put all this fluff into 64kb. Now i'm able to talk about compression
  ratios of 1:44, yep - the compressed final exe is 2% of total
  directory size.

  For greetings, please refer to your local toilet paper merchandise store.


  RC-OCEAN.ZIP is a registered trademark of rECTUM cAUDA incorporated.
  RC-OCEAN.ZIP competed at the Gathering '97 64kb intro competition,
  and presumably won first place. Thank you all very much for all the votes.


Now, this part is mostly for organizers. Let's see if this intro
complies with your official rules...

64k Intro PC/Amiga

           │
Real Life  │            Requirements
           │
 (√)       │    * PC and Amiga will compete in the same competition
 (65332)   │    * Max 65536 bytes
 (linked   │    * No dos extender allowed beside the intro. If you can squeeze
  9.8kb)   │      it in the 64k, you're welcome to do it :)
 (gus/ns)  │    * Support any soundcard and/or no sound option
 (√)       │    * file_id.diz must be included
           │    * See demo rules for hardware requirements
           │
           │  [hardware requirements:]
 (386+)    │    * Must work on a 486 DX2/66
 (√)       │    * Must work with at least 570kb convential memory
 (3.43mb)  │    * Max 16mb ram
 (√)       │    * DOS 5.0+
 (std vga) │    * VESA 2.0 complient and/or general VGA registers
           │

As you can see, this intro meets or *exceeds* all the requirements.
By the way, look out for a SB+GUS version soon to be released. :)