Micro R&D 1/MicroRD-CD-ROM-Vol1-1994.iso/books/irving/b_tavern

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                                    1819-20
                                THE SKETCH BOOK
                       THE BOAR'S HEAD TAVERN, EASTCHEAP
                            A SHAKSPEARIAN RESEARCH
                              by Washington Irving

  "A tavern is the rendezvous, the exchange, the staple of good
fellows. I have heard my great-grandfather tell, how his
great-great-grandfather should say, that it was an old proverb when
his great-grandfather was a child, that 'it was a good wind that
blew a man to the wine.'"
                                                       MOTHER BOMBIE.

  IT IS a pious custom, in some Catholic countries, to honor the
memory of saints by votive lights burnt before their pictures. The
popularity of a saint, therefore, may be known by the number of
these offerings. One, perhaps, is left to moulder in the darkness of
his little chapel; another may have a solitary lamp to throw its
blinking rays athwart his effigy; while the whole blaze of adoration
is lavished at the shrine of some beatified father of renown. The
wealthy devotee brings his huge luminary of wax; the eager zealot
his seven-branched candlestick, and even the mendicant pilgrim is by
no means satisfied that sufficient light is thrown upon the
deceased, unless he hangs up his little lamp of smoking oil. The
consequence is, that in the eagerness to enlighten, they are often apt
to obscure; and I have occasionally seen an unlucky saint almost
smoked out of countenance by the officiousness of his followers.
  In like manner has it fared with the immortal Shakspeare. Every
writer considers it his bounden duty to light up some portion of his
character or works, and to rescue some merit from oblivion. The
commentator, opulent in words, produces vast tomes of dissertations;
the common herd of editors send up mists of obscurity from their notes
at the bottom of each page; and every casual scribbler brings his
farthing rushlight of eulogy or research, to swell the cloud of
incense and of smoke.
  As I honor all established usages of my brethren of the quill, I
thought it but proper to contribute my mite of homage to the memory of
the illustrious bard. I was for some time, however, sorely puzzled
in what way I should discharge this duty. I found myself anticipated
in every attempt at a new reading; every doubtful line had been
explained a dozen different ways, and perplexed beyond the reach of
elucidation; and as to fine passages, they had all been amply
praised by previous admirers; nay, so completely had the bard, of
late, been overlarded with panegyric by a great German critic, that it
was difficult now to find even a fault that had not been argued into a
beauty.
  In this perplexity, I was one morning turning over his pages, when I
casually opened upon the comic scenes of Henry IV., and was, in a
moment, completely lost in the madcap revelry of the Boar's Head
Tavern. So vividly and naturally are these scenes of humor depicted,
and with such force and consistency are the characters sustained, that
they become mingled up in the mind with the facts and personages of
real life. To few readers does it occur, that these are all ideal
creations of a poet's brain, and that, in sober truth, no such knot of
merry roysterers ever enlivened the dull neighborhood of Eastcheap.
  For my part I love to give myself up to the illusions of poetry. A
hero of fiction that never existed is just as valuable to me as a hero
of history that existed a thousand years since: and, if I may be
excused such an insensibility to the common ties of human nature, I
would not give up fat Jack for half the great men of ancient
chronicle. What have the heroes of yore done for me, or men like me?
They have conquered countries of which I do not enjoy an acre; or they
have gained laurels of which I do not inherit a leaf; or they have
furnished examples of hair-brained prowess, which I have neither the
opportunity nor the inclination to follow. But, old Jack Falstaff!-
kind Jack Falstaff! sweet Jack Falstaff!- has enlarged the
boundaries of human enjoyment; he has added vast regions of wit and
good humor, in which the poorest man may revel; and has bequeathed a
never-failing inheritance of jolly laughter, to make mankind merrier
and better to the latest posterity.
  A thought suddenly struck me: "I will make a pilgrimage to
Eastcheap," said I, closing the book, "and see if the old Boar's
Head Tavern still exists. Who knows but I may light upon some
legendary traces of Dame Quickly and her guests; at any rate, there
will be a kindred pleasure, in treading the halls once vocal with
their mirth, to that the toper enjoys in smelling to the empty cask
once filled with generous wine."
  The resolution was no sooner formed than put in execution. I forbear
to treat of the various adventures and wonders I encountered in my
travels; of the haunted regions of Cock Lane; of the faded glories
of Little Britain, and the parts adjacent; what perils I ran in
Cateaton-street and old Jewry; of the renowned Guildhall and its two
stunted giants, the pride and wonder of the city, and the terror of
all unlucky urchins; and how I visited London Stone, and struck my
staff upon it, in imitation of that arch rebel, Jack Cade.
  Let it suffice to say, that I at length arrived in merry
Eastcheap, that ancient region of wit and wassail, where the very
names of the streets relished of good cheer, as Pudding Lane bears
testimony even at the present day. For Eastcheap, says old Stowe, "was
always famous for its convivial doings. The cookes cried hot ribbes of
beef roasted, pies well baked, and other victuals: there was
clattering of pewter pots, harpe, pipe, and sawtrie." Alas! how
sadly is the scene changed since the roaring days of Falstaff and
old Stowe! The madcap roysterer has given place to the plodding
tradesman; the clattering of pots and the sound of "harpe and
sawtrie," to the din of carts and the accursed dinging of the
dustman's bell; and no song is heard, save, haply, the strain of
some siren from Billingsgate, chanting the eulogy of deceased
mackerel.
  I sought, in vain, for the ancient abode of Dame Quickly. The only
relic of it is a boar's head, carved in relief in stone, which
formerly served as the sign, but at present is built into the
parting line of two houses, which stand on the site of the renowned
old tavern.
  For the history of this little abode of good fellowship, I was
referred to a tallow-chandler's widow, opposite, who had been born and
brought up on the spot, and was looked up to as the indisputable
chronicler of the neighborhood. I found her seated in a little back
parlor, the window of which looked out upon a yard about eight feet
square, laid out as a flower-garden; while a glass door opposite
afforded a distant peep of the street, through a vista of soap and
tallow candles: the two views, which comprised, in all probability,
her prospects in life, and the little world in which she had lived,
and moved, and had her being, for the better part of a century.
  To be versed in the history of Eastcheap, great and little, from
London Stone even unto the Monument, was doubtless, in her opinion, to
be acquainted with the history of the universe. Yet, with all this,
she possessed the simplicity of true wisdom, and that liberal
communicative disposition, which I have generally remarked in
intelligent old ladies, knowing in the concerns of their neighborhood.
  Her information, however, did not extend far back into antiquity.
She could throw no light upon the history of the Boar's Head, from the
time that Dame Quickly espoused the valiant Pistol, until the great
fire of London, when it was unfortunately burnt down. It was soon
rebuilt, and continued to flourish under the old name and sign,
until a dying landlord, struck with remorse for double scores, bad
measures, and other iniquities, which are incident to the sinful
race of publicans, endeavored to make his peace with heaven, by
bequeathing the tavern to St. Michael's Church, Crooked Lane,
towards the supporting of a chaplain. For some time the vestry
meetings were regularly held there; but it was observed that the old
Boar never held up his head under church government. He gradually
declined, and finally gave his last gasp about thirty years since. The
tavern was then turned into shops; but she informed me that a
picture of it was still preserved in St. Michael's Church, which stood
just in the rear. To get a sight of this picture was now my
determination; so, having informed myself of the abode of the
sexton, I took my leave of the venerable chronicler of Eastcheap, my
visit having doubtless raised greatly her opinion of her legendary
lore, and furnished an important incident in the history of her life.
  It cost me some difficulty, and much curious inquiry, to ferret
out the humble hanger-on to the church. I had to explore Crooked Lane,
and divers little alleys, and elbows, and dark passages, with which
this old city is perforated, like an ancient cheese, or a worm-eaten
chest of drawers. At length I traced him to a corner of a small
court surrounded by lofty houses, where the inhabitants enjoy about as
much of the face of heaven, as a community of frogs at the bottom of a
well.
  The sexton was a meek, acquiescing little man, of a bowing, lowly
habit: yet he had a pleasant twinkling in his eye, and, if encouraged,
would now and then hazard a small pleasantry; such as a man of his low
estate might venture to make in the company of high churchwardens, and
other mighty men of the earth. I found him in company with the
deputy organist, seated apart, like Milton's angels, discoursing, no
doubt, on high doctrinal points, and settling the affairs of the
church over a friendly pot of ale- for the lower classes of English
seldom deliberate on any weighty matter without the assistance of a
cool tankard to clear their understandings. I arrived at the moment
when they had finished their ale and their argument, and were about to
repair to the church to put it in order; so having made known my
wishes, I received their gracious permission to accompany them.
  The church of St. Michael's, Crooked Lane, standing a short distance
from Billingsgate, is enriched with the tombs of many fishmongers of
renown; and as every profession has its galaxy of glory, and its
constellation of great men, I presume the monument of a mighty
fishmonger of the olden time is regarded with as much reverence by
succeeding generations of the craft, as poets feel on contemplating
the tomb of Virgil, or soldiers the monument of a Marlborough or
Turenne.
  I cannot but turn aside, while thus speaking of illustrious men,
to observe that St. Michael's, Crooked Lane, contains also the ashes
of that doughty champion, William Walworth, knight, who so manfully
clove down the sturdy wight, Wat Tyler, in Smithfield; a hero worthy
of honorable blazon, as almost the only Lord Mayor on record famous
for deeds of arms:- the sovereigns of Cockney being generally renowned
as the most pacific of all potentates.*

  * The following was the ancient inscription on the monument of
this worthy; which, unhappily, was destroyed in the great
conflagration.

           Hereunder lyth a man of Fame,
           William Walworth callyd by name;
           Fishmonger he was in lyfftime here,
           And twise Lord Maior, as in books appere;
           Who, with courage stout and manly myght,
           Slew Jack Straw in Kyng Richard's sight.
           For which act done, and trew entent,
           The Kyng made him knyght incontinent;
           And gave him armes, as here you see,
           To declare his fact and chivaldrie.
           He left this lyff the yere of our God
           Thirteen hundred fourscore and three odd.

  An error in the foregoing inscription has been corrected by the
venerable Stowe. "Whereas," saith he, "it hath been far spread
abroad by vulgar opinion, that the rebel smitten down so manfully by
Sir William Walworth, the then worthy Lord Maior, was named Jack
Straw, and not Wat Tyler, I thought good to reconcile this
rash-conceived doubt by such testimony as I find in ancient and good
records. The principal leaders, or captains, of the commons, were
Wat Tyler, as the first man; the second was John, or Jack, Straw,"
etc., etc.
                                                STOWE'S LONDON.

  Adjoining the church, in a small cemetery, immediately under the
back window of what was once the Boar's Head, stands the tombstone
of Robert Preston, whilom drawer at the tavern. It is now nearly a
century since this trusty drawer of good liquor closed his bustling
career, and was thus quietly deposited within call of his customers.
As I was clearing away the weeds from his epitaph, the little sexton
drew me on one side with a mysterious air, and informed me in a low
voice, that once upon a time, on a dark wintry night, when the wind
was unruly, howling, and whistling, banging about doors and windows,
and twirling weathercocks, so that the living were frightened out of
their beds, and even the dead could not sleep quietly in their graves,
the ghost of honest Preston, which happened to be airing itself in the
church-yard, was attracted by the well-known call of "waiter" from the
Boar's Head, and made its sudden appearance in the midst of a
roaring club, just as the parish clerk was singing a stave from the
"mirre garland of Captain Death;" to the discomfiture of sundry
train-band captains, and the conversion of an infidel attorney, who
became a zealous Christian on the spot, and was never known to twist
the truth afterwards, except in the way of business.
  I beg it may be remembered, that I do not pledge myself for the
authenticity of this anecdote; though it is well known that the
church-yards and by-corners of this old metropolis are very much
infested with perturbed spirits; and every one must have heard of
the Cock Lane ghost, and the apparition that guards the regalia in the
Tower, which has frightened so many bold sentinels almost out of their
wits.
  Be all this as it may, this Robert Preston seems to have been a
worthy successor to the nimble-tongued Francis, who attended upon
the revels of Prince Hal; to have been equally prompt with his
"anon, anon, sir;" and to have transcended his predecessor in honesty;
for Falstaff, the veracity of whose taste no man will venture to
impeach, flatly accuses Francis of putting lime in his sack; whereas
honest Preston's epitaph lauds him for the sobriety of his conduct,
the soundness of his wine, and the fairness of his measure.* The
worthy dignitaries of the church, however, did not appear much
captivated by the sober virtues of the tapster; the deputy organist,
who had a moist look out of the eye, made some shrewd remark on the
abstemiousness of a man brought up among full hogsheads; and the
little sexton corroborated his opinion by a significant wink, and a
dubious shake of the head.

  * As this inscription is rife with excellent morality, I
transcribe it for the admonition of delinquent tapsters. It is, no
doubt, the production of some choice spirit, who once frequented the
Boar's Head.

           Bacchus, to give the toping world surprise,
           Produced one sober son, and here he lies.
           Though rear'd among full hogsheads, he defy'd
           The charms of wine, and every one beside.
           O reader, if to justice thou'rt inclined,
           Keep honest Preston daily in thy mind.
           He drew good wine, took care to fill his pots,
           Had sundry virtues that excused his faults.
           You that on Bacchus have the like dependance,
           Pray copy Bob in measure and attendance.

  Thus far my researches, though they threw much light on the
history of tapsters, fishmongers, and Lord Mayors, yet disappointed me
in the great object of my quest, the picture of the Boar's Head
Tavern. No such painting was to be found in the church of St. Michael.
"Marry and amen!" said I, "here endeth my research!" So I was giving
the matter up, with the air of a baffled antiquary, when my friend the
sexton, perceiving me to be curious in every thing relative to the old
tavern, offered to show me the choice vessels of the vestry, which had
been handed down from remote times, when the parish meetings were held
at the Boar's Head. These were deposited in the parish club-room,
which had been transferred, on the decline of the ancient
establishment, to a tavern in the neighborhood.
  A few steps brought us to the house, which stands No. 12 Miles Lane,
bearing the title of The Mason's Arms, and is kept by Master Edward
Honeyball, the "bully-rock" of the establishment. It is one of those
little taverns which abound in the heart of the city, and form the
centre of gossip and intelligence of the neighborhood. We entered
the bar-room, which was narrow and darkling; for in these close
lanes but few rays of reflected light are enabled to struggle down
to the inhabitants, whose broad day is at best but a tolerable
twilight. The room was partitioned into boxes, each containing a table
spread with a clean white cloth, ready for dinner. This showed that
the guests were of the good old stamp, and divided their day
equally, for it was but just one o'clock. At the lower end of the room
was a clear coal fire, before which a breast of lamb was roasting. A
row of bright brass candlesticks and pewter mugs glistened along the
mantelpiece, and an old-fashioned clock ticked in one corner. There
was something primitive in this medley of kitchen, parlor, and hall,
that carried me back to earlier times, and pleased me. The place,
indeed, was humble, but every thing had that look of order and
neatness, which bespeaks the superintendence of a notable English
housewife. A group of amphibious-looking beings, who might be either
fishermen or sailors, were regaling themselves in one of the boxes. As
I was a visitor of rather higher pretensions, I was ushered into a
little misshapen backroom, having at least nine corners. It was
lighted by a skylight, furnished with antiquated leathern chairs,
and ornamented with the portrait of a fat pig. It was evidently
appropriated to particular customers, and I found a shabby
gentleman, in a red nose and oil-cloth hat, seated in one corner,
meditating on a half-empty pot of porter.
  The old sexton had taken the landlady aside, and with an air of
profound importance imparted to her my errand. Dame Honeyball was a
likely, plump, bustling little woman, and no bad substitute for that
paragon of hostesses, Dame Quickly. She seemed delighted with an
opportunity to oblige; and hurrying up stairs to the archives of her
house, where the precious vessels of the parish club were deposited,
she returned, smiling and courtesying, with them in her hands.
  The first she presented me was a japanned iron tobacco-box, of
gigantic size, out of which, I was told, the vestry had smoked at
their stated meetings, since time immemorial; and which was never
suffered to be profaned by vulgar hands, or used on common
occasions. I received it with becoming reverence; but what was my
delight, at beholding on its cover the identical painting of which I
was in quest! There was displayed the outside of the Boar's Head
Tavern, and before the door was to be seen the whole convivial
group, at table, in full revel; pictured with that wonderful
fidelity and force, with which the portraits of renowned generals
and commodores are illustrated on tobacco-boxes, for the benefit of
posterity. Lest, however, there should be any mistake, the cunning
limner had warily inscribed the names of Prince Hal and Falstaff on
the bottoms of their chairs.
  On the inside of the cover was an inscription, nearly obliterated,
recording that this box was the gift of Sir Richard Gore, for the
use of the vestry meetings at the Boar's Head Tavern, and that it
was "repaired and beautified by his successor, Mr. John Packard,
1767." Such is a faithful description of this august and venerable
relic; and I question whether the learned Scriblerius contemplated his
Roman shield, or the Knights of the Round Table the long-sought
san-greal, with more exultation.
  While I was meditating on it with enraptured gaze, Dame Honeyball,
who was highly gratified by the interest it excited, put in my hands a
drinking cup or goblet, which also belonged to the vestry, and was
descended from the old Boar's Head. It bore the inscription of
having been the gift of Francis Wythers, knight, and was held, she
told me, in exceeding great value, being considered very "antyke."
This last opinion was strengthened by the shabby gentleman in the
red nose and oil-cloth hat, and whom I strongly suspected of being a
lineal descendant from the valiant Bardolph. He suddenly roused from
his meditation on the pot of porter, and, casting a knowing look at
the goblet, exclaimed, "Ay, ay! the head don't ache now that made that
there article!"
  The great importance attached to this memento of ancient revelry
by modern churchwardens at first puzzled me; but there is nothing
sharpens the apprehension so much as antiquarian research; for I
immediately perceived that this could be no other than the identical
"parcel-gilt goblet" on which Falstaff made his loving, but
faithless vow to Dame Quickly; and which would, of course, be
treasured up with care among the regalia of her domains, as a
testimony of that solemn contract.*

  * Thou didst swear to me upon a parcel-gilt goblet, sitting in my
Dolphin chamber, at the round table, by a sea-coal fire, on Wednesday,
in Whitsunweek, when the prince broke thy head for likening his father
to a singing man at Windsor; thou didst swear to me then, as I was
washing thy wound, to marry me, and make me my lady, thy wife.
Can'st thou deny it?- Henry IV., Part 2.

  Mine hostess, indeed, gave me a long history how the goblet had been
handed down from generation to generation. She also entertained me
with many particulars concerning the worthy vestrymen who have
seated themselves thus quietly on the stools of the ancient roysterers
of Eastcheap, and, like so many commentators, utter clouds of smoke in
honor of Shakspeare. These I forbear to relate, lest my readers should
not be as curious in these matters as myself. Suffice it to say, the
neighbors, one and all, about Eastcheap, believe that Falstaff and his
merry crew actually lived and revelled there. Nay, there are several
legendary anecdotes concerning him still extant among the oldest
frequenters of the Mason's Arms, which they give as transmitted down
from their forefathers; and Mr. M'Kash, an Irish hair-dresser, whose
shop stands on the site of the old Boar's Head, has several dry
jokes of Fat Jack's, not laid down in the books, with which he makes
his customers ready to die of laughter.
  I now turned to my friend the sexton to make some further inquiries,
but I found him sunk in pensive meditation. His head had declined a
little on one side; a deep sigh heaved from the very bottom of his
stomach; and, though I could not see a tear trembling in his eye,
yet a moisture was evidently stealing from a corner of his mouth. I
followed the direction of his eye through the door which stood open,
and found it fixed wistfully on the savory breast of lamb, roasting in
dripping richness before the fire.
  I now called to mind that, in the eagerness of my recondite
investigation, I was keeping the poor man from his dinner. My bowels
yearned with sympathy, and, putting in his hand a small token of my
gratitude and goodness, I departed, with a hearty benediction on
him, Dame Honeyball, and the Parish Club of Crooked Lane;- not
forgetting my shabby, but sententious friend, in the oil-cloth hat and
copper nose.
  Thus have I given a "tedious brief" account of this interesting
research, for which, if it prove too short and unsatisfactory, I can
only plead my inexperience in this branch of literature, so deservedly
popular at the present day. I am aware that a more skilful illustrator
of the immortal bard would have swelled the materials I have touched
upon, to a good merchantable bulk; comprising the biographies of
William Walworth, Jack Straw, and Robert Preston; some notice of the
eminent fishmongers of St. Michael's; the history of Eastcheap,
great and little; private anecdotes of Dame Honeyball, and her
pretty daughter, whom I have not even mentioned; to say nothing of a
damsel tending the breast of lamb, (and whom, by the way, I remarked
to be a comely lass, with a neat foot and ankle;)- the whole enlivened
by the riots of Wat Tyler, and illuminated by the great fire of
London.
  All this I leave, as a rich mine, to be worked by future
commentators; nor do I despair of seeing the tobacco-box, and the
"parcel-gilt goblet," which I have thus brought to light, the subjects
of future engravings, and almost as fruitful of voluminous
dissertations and disputes as the shield of Achilles, or the far-famed
Portland vase.


                        THE END