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buffyfic-digest          Friday, May 8 1998          Volume 02 : Number 169



In this issue:

       BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (9/?)
       BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (8/?)
       BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" Interlude # 5: "Cement Rebirth," by Ingrid

See the end of the digest for information on (un)subscribing to the buffyfic
or buffyfic-digest mailing lists and on how to retrieve back issues.

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Date: Fri, 8 May 1998 16:47:30 -0700
From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (9/?)

Name: The Chronicles of the White Knight #9 This Little Game I Play
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Please send
Uses in anything: Sure, but tell me first.
Spoiler: Not really, might have mentioned a past episode.
Description: Angel's intentions and Buffy/Xander tension
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Warning: PG

*******************************

The Chronicles of the White Knight
#9  This Little Game I Play
By: Taygeta

    The night was dark and cold and there was barely a star visible
in the sky.  Buffy and Xander were out on night patrol, and were wishing
that they were home and warm.  It had been two hours since Buffy had
staked a vampire trying to get out of its grave and in those two hours,
Xander thought he was going to die of cold.
    "Full moon's coming soon, Oz better lock himself in his house,
again," thought Xander aloud, looking at the only visible object in the
sky, the moon, as his teeth chattered a bit.
    Buffy, with her slayer abilities, wasn't as cold as Xander, who
was shivering like a cute kitten in the storm.  With a sigh, her breath
was a swirl of cloud in the night, she glanced at him and asked, "Xander,
if you're so cold, why did you volunteer to come and help me patrol?
It's a Saturday night and you could be warm and cozy in the Bronze,
and..."
    "And alone," finished Xander, "Buffy, I'd rather be out here with
you freezing, then being stuck at the Bronze for another Saturday night,
watching Cordelia groping with Colin."
    "Gee, Xander, you sure know how to make a girl feel special,"
said Buffy sarcastically with a smile.
    "You know what I mean, Buffy," said Xander giving her a look.
    "Yes, I know what you mean, Xander," said Buffy nodding her head,
"But you've got to stop agonizing over Cordelia.  I mean, the more
pitiful you look the more she'll think you're suffering.  Are you
suffering, Xander?"
    "Suffering from what?  Post Cordy Syndrome?" asked Xander raising
his eyebrows.  "No, I'm not suffering, Buffy.  Maybe a little angry and I
feel a little disappointed, but no, I'm not suffering."
    "Then, why all this agonizing over her, Xander?" asked Buffy, who
still thought it a wonder that he had even been with her in the first
place.  "What is it that you find in her that's making you go totally
maxi-wig over everything, lately?"
    "I don't know, I guess with Cordelia, I had, and I stress the
word had, security," replied Xander, and Buffy frowned.
    "What do you mean, Xander?  By security?" asked Buffy glancing at
his face in confusion.
    "You wouldn't understand," said Xander shaking his head, and
Buffy knew not to ask any further.
    It had been three weeks since Xander had broken up with Cordelia
and in those three weeks, Xander was seemingly hanging out with her...a
lot.  Not that she minded, not in the least.  She rather liked having him
around more often it was...nice.  It was just that she was so confused
about everything, and about how she felt.  She knew that her feelings for
Xander were evolving, but to what it was evolving to was beyond her.
Deep down inside, she knew that her answer could be found in something so
simple and so powerful, but it was something that she knew she wouldn't
be able to have, at least not from him.  She needed to be kissed again.
    Buffy hadn't forgotten their first kiss, nor did she think she'd
ever forget such a kiss.  His warm lips pressed so gently against her
own, sending a wave of electricity down her spine that jolted her entire
self.  With every racing heartbeat she felt something that succeeded
passion and crushed the boundaries between two souls.  Was what she
felt...could it be...could she now after Angel have truly found...love?
But how could she tell so much from just that one kiss and a planned kiss
at that?  That was why she needed to feel his lips against hers
again...to feel that it wasn't just passion or the heat of the moment or
just the spell, itself, and most of all, to see if she could discover her
heart again.  She needed all this to find what Xander had known ever
since he first saw her.
    There was so much confusion within her mind and her heart that
they both had begun to crash into something that was slowly, but surely
becoming more than she thought she could handle.  It wasn't as if Xander
was in his normal-frame of mind, whatever that may be, either, for he was
in a state of confusion himself.  He was free from his bondage with
Cordelia, and free to love Buffy, but was Buffy unbound, too?  Or was she
still clinging onto a hope and a love that was in the lost Angel...her
lost Angel?  Every time Xander looked at Buffy, he just wanted to kiss
her again, and hold her close...and never let go.  But he couldn't hold
her and he couldn't kiss her.  All he could do was love her.
    As Buffy and Xander became immersed in their thoughts, a silence
had grown between them.  When they came back to reality, it was rather
awkward, but it wasn't awkward for long.  Suddenly a vampire crawled out
of its grave in a dirty black suit and grabbed Buffy's leg.  Buffy kicked
the vampire off of her leg and then punched it squarely in its fanged
face.
    "Bye," said Buffy before she staked it, causing it to fall into
ashes on the dewy grass beside the empty grave.
    "I wonder how many of these graves are really empty," said Xander
as Buffy stood up.
    "Too many to count, Xander, too many to count," said Buffy with a
sigh as she and Xander began walking to another section of the graveyard.
    In the distance, a pair of evil eyes watched them intently them.
A smile of evil contempt fell on Angelus's lips, as he read their minds
through their actions.  As they walked away from his viewpoint, a mental
picture began to become twisted in his wicked thoughts.
    "So my lover's gotten over me already?  And for who else but the
White Knight that hates me so greatly?" whispered Angelus in the night,
"She has fallen, but she'll fall even harder.  After all, this is all
part of this little game I play, in which I'm bound to win,  especially
when she sees her gallant white knight, dead and in the ground..."

***********************
End of Part 9!  Feed back Please?

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------------------------------

Date: Fri, 8 May 1998 16:40:21 -0700
From: [e-mail] (Charity C. T.)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles (8/?)

Name: The Chronicles of the White Knight #8 No Turning Back
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Please send
Uses in anything: Sure, but tell me first.
Spoiler: Not really, might have mentioned a past episode.
Description: A Xander and Cordelia aspect of the series
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Warning: Not really, just kissing, and no major violence or foul
language.  So, PG
Author's Note: I know I haven't sent my Chronicles to the list in a long
time, but now that I have some free time, I thought I'd send them.
Meaning, 8-11(I just finished this one), so watch the numbers carefully
*************************
The Chronicles of the White Knight
#8 No Turning Back
By: Taygeta

    Cordelia peered into the classroom and noticed that her science
teacher, Mr. Barb, had left, but there was still one more person left in
the room.  She recognized him and realized that he was one of the college
students that she had seen at a party once.  It was on that day that she
and buffy were almost sacrificed to that huge ugly giant worm or whatever
it was.  He hadn't been one of the fraternity brothers, but as she noted
his Armani ensemble, she could see that he was definitely of the well-off
kind.  He looked up at her when he heard the door creak loudly and saw
her eyes scanning the classroom, and scanning him.  His frosted blue eyes
met hers and his charming smile made Cordelia blush.
    "Yes, how may I help you?" he asked, his smile becoming even more
refine by each passing second.
    "Um, I was looking for Mr. Barb, but I guess he isn't here," said
Cordelia with a hesitant smile.
    "No, but he'll be back shortly.  He just stepped out to run an
errand, so please come in," he said with a welcoming motion.
    "Oh, okay," said Cordelia as she walked in and sat down on a desk
near him.    'The name's Colin, Colin Williams, how do you do?" he
asked extending his hand to shake hers.
    "Fine, thank you," she said, as she too, extended his hand, "My
name's Cordelia."
    "Cordelia, hmm.  A very pretty name for an even more beautiful
young woman," complimented Colin with a smile.  "I'm going to be Mr.
Barb's teacher's aide for this semester.  It's part of my pre-teacher
experience."
    "Oh, really?  You want to be a teacher?" asked Cordelia thinking
that that had to be the most hardest and least paying jobs in the world.
"That's gotta be pretty tough work, and well, Armani suits aren't that
easy to come by on that type of salary."
    "You noticed the Armani, huh?  One of the many advantages of
being pampered and stuffed for all my 19 years," said Colin.  "And I
guess it's because of all of that indulgence that I wanted to give back
to society and do something for the good of mankind, and not just for
myself.  You are right though, it is a pretty tough job."
    The door to the classroom opened up quickly and shut just as
promptly.  Cordelia and Colin turned to see Xander walking into the room
and Mr. Barb had walked in before him.  Xander noticed how closely Colin
and Cordelia were standing next to each other, but he was silent.
Cordelia eyed her boyfriend and felt uneasy that his usually blatant
attitude was noticeably absent.
    "Cordelia, I see you've met Colin," said Mr. Barb with a smile as
he sat down at his desk.  "Now, I hear you and Xander wanted to ask me
more about the project I just assigned you..."
    After Xander and Cordelia had left Mr. Barb's room, they had
begun to walk home.  The sun was on its way to setting and both walked in
silence, which anyone could vouch was very odd.  Ever since that spell,
their relationship hadn't quite returned to normal.  Cordelia didn't
suspect that Xander remembered anything, and Xander wasn't about to tell
her he knew everything.  That lack of trust or information had caused
things to be a little rocky between them, but Xander hoped that
everything would turn out for the better, soon.
    "Well, Xander, I guess I'll see you tomorrow," said Cordelia,
giving him a kiss on the cheek once they were at her house.
    "Yeah, Cordelia, tomorrow,' Xander said with a trying smile, and
as he noticed that it was getting dark, and thought that the creatures of
the night were probably stirring in their coffins.
    Xander walked to his house, which was only a few blocks away,
considering the small size of Sunnydale, the rich and the average were in
one section.  He heard the crickets stop chirping once he walked up the
porch steps to his house, and he had uneasy feeling.  As he nervously
reached for his keys, he dropped them, but before he could pick them up,
someone already had.
    "Hello, Xander," said a voice in the dark, "Nice night, isn't
it?"
    "Yeah," said Xander glancing into the shadows as he recognized
the voice instantly, "A very nice night, considering that I have a
vampire on my front porch.  What do you want, Angel?"
    "It's not Angel, Xander, it's Angelus,' he said as he stepped out
from the shadows.  "Angel's gone, remember?  Now, you've only got Angelus
to fight."
    "What are you talking about?"  Xander asked looking at Angel with
cold eyes.  "I've never fought Angel, and I've hit you, but as it seems,
that's not considered fighting, especially if it didn't hurt."
    "On the contrary, Xander, I seem to recall that you weren't very
happy when our precious Slayer chose Angel over you," said Angelus with
an evil grin.     "I mean, Angel knew what you were thinking, and so
do I."
    "And what's that, Angelus?" asked Xander stiffly.
    "That the slayer would rather be with someone she was born to
kill than to be you," said Angelus as he continuously threw and caught
Xander's keys.
    "Well, Angelus, you're wrong," replied Xander eyeing the keys
that fell and rose, "I didn't think like that.  Buffy made her choice,
and it was Angel.  It was her choice to make and hers alone.  It didn't
make me love her any less and my opinion of Angel didn't change.  Sure, I
admit, I never liked Angel, but there's one thing I've realized now that
you've arrived."
    "What's that?" asked Angelus with a smirk, who couldn't' believe
how sappy Xander sounded.
    "That I hate you," said Xander calmly.
    "Ditto," said a familiar voice, which caused Xander and Angelus
to turn to see Buffy.
    "Buffy, it's nice of you to join the party," said Angelus, "But
you weren't invited."
    "I didn't know I had to RSVP, but since I'm here, do you mind?"
asked Buffy glancing at the keys in Angelus' hand.
    "I don't know, Buffy, I'm kind of partial to these keys," said
Angelus glancing at the glinting metal in his hand.
    Buffy smiled at his joke before she kicked him in the stomach,
causing him to fall and drop the keys.  Angelus groaned as he tried to
stand up, but Buffy kicked him again and tossed the keys to Xander.
Xander fiddled with the keys and was able to open the door.
    "Buffy, come on," said Xander hurriedly, and Buffy turned to look
at Xander, giving him the expression that she wasn't going to runaway
from a good fight, but when she turned to look at Angelus, he was gone.
    "Wimp," muttered Buffy under her breath as she reluctantly walked
into the Harris' house.
    "Buffy, better to be a wimp than to be dead," said Xander
jokingly as he closed the door behind her.  "I speak from experience."
    "That Angelus makes me so mad, I can't believe that he was ever
Angel," said Buffy with a sigh.
    "But Buffy, he was never Angel.  I mean granted they look alike
and have that whole vampire soul and no soul bond thing going on, but
even Angelus makes out that they're two different people," pointed out
Xander as he and Buffy sat down on the couch and he turned on the
television set.
    "I'm sick and tired of Angelus, let's not talk about him,
anymore, okay?" asked Buffy glancing at Xander.
    "Sure, Buffy," said Xander and he turned back to channel surfing,
and then disgustingly turned it off.  "There is nothing to watch,
tonight!  What are we going to do?"
    "Well, we have two options," said Buffy, "One we could stay home
and be responsible, young adults by beginning our science project for Mr.
Barb or two, we could slack off and hang at the Bronze."
    "The Bronze it is," said Xander standing up abruptly.
    Buffy and Xander walked into the Bronze, which was its usually
crowded self.  They found Oz and Willow sitting in their usual table and
decided to interrupt the cute lovebirds.
    "Hi," said Buffy smiling at Oz and Willow, "What's up?"
    "I thought you had patrol tonight, Buffy," said Willow, her eyes
widened with urgency as she looked at Buffy and darted to the dance
floor.
    "Oh, really?" said Buffy, who looked at the dance floor in the
corner of her eye, and once she saw what Willow had showed her, she was
in a mad rush to get Xander out of there.  "I guess I forgot.  Xander,
come on, we don't want to interrupt Willow and Oz's date."
    "Willow, I am shocked at you for forgetting our patrol schedules.
 Tonight, Giles is taking over shift with Cordelia," said Xander, and
then his mouth opened a little once he saw noticed the couple in the
center of the dance floor, who were none other than, Colin and Cordelia.
They were dancing rather close and tight and Xander held his composure as
he continued, "Or not."
    He stood watching them intently as they danced.  They were
dancing so closely that they were almost one whole, instead of two.  It
bothered Xander that they were dancing like that because he had never
danced like that with Cordy before and there she was dancing like that
with a practical stranger.  But that didn't even compare to what happen
to next that made Xander officially stunned and steamed.  Colin, who was
a five inches taller than Cordelia when she was in heels, bent his head
down and kissed a very surprised dance partner.  Of course, this very
surprised dance partner didn't seem as if she wanted the kiss to end, and
it lingered even when the music stopped
    Xander made sure that he was going to meet with Cordelia when she
came from the dance floor.  Colin separated with Cordelia and went to get
them drinks and Xander walked towards a surprised Cordelia.  She was
taken back by his appearance there.
    "Xander, what are you doing here?" asked Cordelia with wide eyes.
    "I'd like to ask you the same question," said Xander.
    "Let's sit down, we have to talk," she said as she and Xander sat
down at a table a few feet away from where their friends sat.
    "Who was that guy, anyway?  That Colin guy?" asked Xander
glancing at Colin who had kept his distance once he saw Xander.
    "He's Mr. Barb's teacher's aide," said Cordelia with a smile,
"He's really nice and sweet and smart."
    "Everything, I'm not, right?" said Xander with a sigh.
    "No, Xander, you're all that and more, but this thing between us
isn't working out, and you know the reason why," said Cordelia as she
quickly glanced at the staring eyes of Oz, Willow, and who else, Buffy.
    "No, Cordy, I don't know what you're talking about," said Xander,
"Enlighten me."
    "How do you expect us to be a couple if you are in love with
Buffy?  I mean, don't get me wrong Xander, I like you, but you don't like
me, at least not that strongly," said Cordelia thinking of all the
conflicts Buffy had caused in their relationship.
    "Cordelia, you're coming off as if Buffy is the main factor of
our problems," said Xander.  "I'm with you, so I'm not about to go and
try to woo her, or whatever you want to call it.  I'm not like that, I
know what commitment is, but apparently you don't."
    "What?" asked Cordelia in amazement.
    "You heard me, Cordelia, whatever that was, whatever we had, it
was good for awhile," said Xander bitterly.  "But I would never have
pulled that kind of a stunt even if Buffy were my soulmate okay?  Not
like you have.  It was good, Cordelia.  Up until now, it was good, but
now, it's gone."  Xander stood up and walked away, and although he had
done this countless of times to so many other things, he meant it this
time.  He wasn't going to turn back, especially since there wasn't
anything important there to go back to.

*********************
End Part 8, feedback please!!!!

_____________________________________________________________________
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Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
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------------------------------

Date: Fri, 8 May 1998 19:59:21 -0400
From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" Interlude # 5: "Cement Rebirth," by Ingrid

DISCLAIMER: The characters of Buffy, Giles, Cordelia,
Spike, Xander, Drusilla, Willow, Angel & co. are the property
of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions,
and The Warner Brothers Network, and are used without
permission. The author claims no rights to these characters.

SUMMARY: IÆve decided to help explain the past through
a series of interludes that will be interspersed throughout
the story as it goes on. This series is meant as a companion
to "Reunion." (The flashbacks take place about 9 years
beforehand.) If you havenÆt read "Reunion," this wonÆt
make much sense to you. If you donÆt have parts 1-13
of it, you can write to me and request them.

THANKS go to Michelle, Rachel, Clare, Mike, and
Andrea for their assistance with the Buffy/Angel
reaction scenarios. *Very* helpful in getting through
writerÆs block, guys!
    Also, to everyone here on the list whoÆs
been putting up with my..uh.. lack of stories! =) Enjoy!


"Reunion" Interlude # 5:
"Cement Rebirth"
by Ingrid

Light gray. A wall. Soft pattering outside. Where was outside?

AngelÆs place. She was in his bed. What kind of sick joke could
he possiblyà.

She moved to turn over, but she hit something solid and nearly
screamed. He was facing away from her. Frantically, she
grabbed her neck.

Smooth. She exhaled sharply.

It was him, but he was facing the other way.

Then, with that corporeal assurance, it all came back at her,
permeating her consciousness: a flash of Giles; squeal of the
car; screams; and blood-

So much blood.

She convulsed as WillowÆs death played out in her head. She
wanted to change the dream, but no matter how fast she ran,
it was never enough.

A low groan diffracted off the wall: he was turning over.
The accompanying terror she should have felt didnÆt exist.
She didnÆt have a stake.

Death was abstract; an unreal threat that she was
incapable of comprehending. She didnÆt have a stake.

She regarded him lethargically, unmoving. *He looks like
a disaster.* No stake. No way to killà

Her thoughts came unbidden; absent surface statements
to describe something that was so much deeper. She took
a moment to observe.

A gash on his forehead, dried and messy. Deeply cut circles under
the eyes. The bruise on his cheek, round as an apple, purple
edged with blue. He was still asleep.

"Angel?" Another label. He would kill her.

She saw the eyes flutter, once, twice. Then they remained open,
looking at her like she was something out of a nightmare.

He didnÆt say anything, but the horrific expression grew as his
mind worked. He was incapable of movement. Nonetheless, he
was shrinking from her.

Her tears seemed to clarify her dim vision, instead of blurring it.

How long had she waitedà

She grabbed his face and covered his mouth with hers. He barely
had time to react. He felt her tears on his face.

He opened his eyes and looked her over. And gasped as pointed
anger rose from out of nowhere inside him. He broke the kiss;
shoved himself backwards.

Her eyes went wide in shock.

"Why didnÆt you kill me?" He barely recognized the wail as his
own voice.

She didnÆt react for a minute- his words seemed to completely
disconcert her. Slowly, her face crinkled up, and she shot him
a look of intense pain before burying her face in a pillow.

He wanted to take it back. No, he didnÆt. He was angry.

He was so angry.

He pulled her to him and held her to his chest.
Again, she was disconnected, scared, surprised, but
she didnÆt resist, or stop crying.

She couldnÆt seem to do anything else.

He stroked her back with one hand, not knowing what
else to do. Unbidden, images of the last night theyÆd
spent here played before him. How different it had been.

But not that different.

SheÆd been crying.

Was this closure?

That was when he noticed his face was sopping wet.

And when he realizedà

*My God, IÆm crying.*
***
END, Interlude # 5

_____________________________________________________________________
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------------------------------

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