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Buffyfic-digest       Thursday, January 22 1998       Volume 02 : Number 014



In this issue:

       BUFFYFIC: "This Fleeting Hope" (1/1)
       BUFFYFIC: Final Farewell  (1/1)
       BUFFYFIC:"Night of the Wolf, 3/?"
       BUFFYFIC: Silent Night -all
       BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Buffyfic
       BUFFYFIC: Ill MEt By Moonlight, Part 18 of 19
       BUFFYFIC: Ill MEt By Moonlight, part 19 of 19

See the end of the digest for information on subscribing to the buffyfic
or buffyfic-digest mailing lists and on how to retrieve back issues.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Wed, 21 Jan 1998 23:53:01 EST
From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: "This Fleeting Hope" (1/1)

"This Fleeting Hope"
by Ingrid

I have to say it again: Ack! "Surprise" depressed me a whole
lot, and I'm not talking solely about the Angel thing. The whole
thing (even monday) seemed very fatalistic. Don't get me wrong-
It was well done, but I'm glad these kind of episodes are kept to
a minimum. I couldn't watch if they weren't. This is just a little
vignette I wrote a long, long time ago dealing with BuffyÆs hopes
for Angel.  It contains mostly angst and a little romance.  I place
this story just before "Ted," so it's pretty moldy. Just thought it
might get some spirits up.

DISCLAIMER: The characters of Buffy Summers, Angel, Rupert
Giles, & company are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant
Enemy, and The Warner Brothers Network, and are used
without permission. The author claims no rights to these
characters.

***
"The natural flights of the human mind are not from pleasure to
pleasure, but from hope to hope."
Samuel Johnson , The Rambler

***
Buffy Summers walked down the street towards her house
completely absorbed in her own thoughts. She didnÆt notice
the beautiful red streaks across the sky as the sun blazed in its
 final glory before sinking below the horizon.

Just as an idea was about to take shape in her mind, she
almost ran straight into someone wearing black.

Angel.

"I thought weÆd moved past the stage in our relationship where
we need to mysteriously smack into each other in the middle
of the sidewalk."

He only smiled back at her, and she couldnÆt help the corners of
 her mouth from turning up in response. But she was concerned,
too. Angel didnÆt seem to know how to rest.

"What are you doing out of bed? You need time to recover from
that ritual. I thought we agreed on a week." After what Spike and
Drusilla had put him through, a month wouldnÆt be time enough,
but she felt lucky when Angel had agreed on a week. Now he was
out here, probably hunting vampires just looking to get into trouble.

"Buffy, I had to tell you-."

"That somethingÆs up? DonÆt worry. I know Spike and Dru are still
alive. Giles read about it in one of his books. WeÆre doing
advanced crossbow work tomorrow. Hey, listen- Can you do me
a favor? Please come with good news next time- or better yet, no
news. I like no news. Now come on." She pulled at his arm.

"Where are we going?"

"IÆm taking you home, and I wonÆt take no for an answer." They
walked slowly there, Buffy leading, and Angel trailing behind her,
finally getting to his place as darkness took hold of the sky. Buffy
walked in and looked around.

"Geez, no wonder you canÆt sleep! ItÆs so cold in here!" She
shivered.

He closed the door. "Are you cold?" He crossed the room towards
her.

"ArenÆt you?" she asked, looking up at him.

"Maybe just a little," he replied wryly, taking her into his arms.

She drew her own arms up around his neck. "Oh. I forgot. You donÆt
get cold."

He smiled.

She watched his features light up in that instant, and couldnÆt seem
to get over that angelic face. There was something sunny and
captivating about his smile; some hidden hope showing through
that gloomy  mask he continuously put on for the world.

Hope for what exactly?

A life beyond blood and demons and not being able to see himself
in the mirror? A day when he might again see the sun? She felt pain
 for him, and tried to smile.

Poor Angel.

She touched his face.

He closed his eyes as her gentle hand passed over his cheek.

Again.

His eyes were closed, but he still wore that little smile, affected
by her touch. He leaned into the slight pressure of her fingers like
a cat leans in to be petted. How dark had his years been to make
this such a heavenly encounter?

The only sun that remained for him he found in her blonde hair.
Every hope rested in the love they shared. It would be so easy to
hurt him, but she vowed she never would.

There was still hope-

Somehow-

She looked at him again. He looked back at her questioningly.

Somehow he was-

Innocent. Young. Childlike almostà

She stood on her toes and pressed her lips to his. They were soft.
Warm. She felt him rest his arms around her waist.

Buffy relaxed in his arms. Kissing him felt good, but something
elseà

It felt right.

He was tender and completely gentleà

like an angel.

She ran her fingers through the hair at the back of his neck.
Eventually, Angel pulled away, still watching her mysteriously, as
if he could see her from behind himself. She never knew what to
make of his expressions. Cryptic-guy was right.

"Are you okay, Angel?" She touched his face.

"IÆll be fine. DonÆt worry about me."

"Impossibility." She smiled.

He smiled back timidly. She kissed him shortly, and ever so gently,
and began to step away into the darkness of the night. Then she
turned around.

"No going out tonight, okay? You promise?"

He held up his right hand in mock earnestness. She smiled again.
 "Goodnight, Angel"

"Goodnight, Buffy."

***
I know this is silly, but I haven't had time to write anything new!
Send comments, compliments, AND flames (if you must) to
[e-mail].



- -

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 14:19:10 EST
From: Isis212 <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Final Farewell  (1/1)

Hey everybody!

I have pulled myself from the hell (read: flu) I've been living in for the
past week
to send this out.  I wrote this way before the cryfest we so fondly call S/I.
But
as I was rewatching the tape today (tears are still a-flowin') I figured maybe
my
little story could relate.  If you want it to.  It's set in the future so
maybe it
doesn't relate but, hey, who cares.  It's sad, it's short.  Be warned.


TITLE:  Final Farewell
AUTHOR:  Aramat!
EMAIL:  [e-mail]
DIST:  Ask and you shall recieve.
SUMMARY:  Buffy decides it's time to move on.
RATING:  G
FEEDBACK:  Flood my mailbox with it.  I beg you.
DISC:  I don't own Buffy or her friends.  Joss Whedon and the WB do.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Final Farewell

Buffy stared at the calendar, tears forming in her eyes as she focused
on the big red X marking another day.  She'd started the ritual the night
Angel had left.  A year later she was still doing it.  Only this time, it was
different.  This time was the last.  The final mark on the calendar also
marked her final goodbye.  After a year of hoping, wishing, and praying.
A year of sadness, anger, and lonliness.  A year without the man she
loved.  She was finally letting him go.

It was, by far, the hardest thing she'd ever done.  She'd spent the last three
years in love with Angel.  She knew there would never be another for her.
She knew she would never love anyone as much as she loved him.  A large
part of her heart was his and she, quite honestly, wanted him to keep it.
He was her soulmate.  He just wasn't her destiny.  It had taken a year,
but she'd finally accepted it.

She'd thought long and hard about her decision.  She'd lost a huge part
of herself when he'd left.  It had taken so long for her to get used to what
little she had left.  But when she had, she'd realized that the little part of
her soul, that small corner of her heart that remained, needed to be loved.
She needed to be cared for.  She needed to move on.  It wasn't going to be
easy, but she needed to do it.  For her.  Because if she didn't she was
going to waste away until one day she'd feel nothing.  Not happiness, not
sadness, not anger, not love.  And if she couldn't feel she couldn't live.
She needed to live, if only to fulfill Angel's request.

But it was more than that.  The past year she'd felt dead.  She hadn't liked
it.  She wanted to wake up every morning and not cry.  She wanted to hang
out with Willow and Xander and actually have fun, not just go through the
motions.  She wanted to be her old self again.  She wanted to live.

One last time, she looked at her calendar, tracing her fingers lightly over
the last X she'd marked.  She let the tears flow as she took the calendar
down, holding it against her as she wept.  When her tears subsided she
stood up and walked over to the trash can.  Dropping it in, she gave the
symbol of her pain, sadness, and lonliness one last look.

"Goodbye," she whispered softly, wiping tears from her eyes.

And then she walked away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Get well wishes will be greatly appreciated.  And somebody please tell me
stop the madness.  Watching that S/I over and over is only going to make
me cry.  And crying is not going to help my cold.  Depression does not a well
person make.  Okay, I'm leaving now before I affect you all.

Aramat! -who says excuse the rambling.  My cold medication just kicked in.

- -

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 18:10:19 EST
From: Thornnwlf <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC:"Night of the Wolf, 3/?"

Before y'all look at me and say, "Plagarist!" I'd changed my name and
resubscribed to the list. I was [e-mail]...This name came from the
story I'm writing for y'all now.
I've finally gotten around to getting back to my story of the Slayer and her
buddies after a *huge* inspiration hit from "Surpise" and "Innocence". WOW!!
Majorly awesome eps! They've been in my head since Monday.
But without further adieu, the continuation of "Night of the Wolf"

Achtung!- The only characters that belong to me are Gabby Angel and Todd
Malone. Everyone else belongs to Joss Whedon, his company, and his brilliant
brain!

Setting: few days after the "Halloween" episode

  Buffy, Xander, and Willow walked into the library after Giles. They'd found
him at home and told him what was going on. Buffy looked especially worried,
and they all knew it was because of Angel.
  She was thinking of Angel while sitting on one of the tables, her feet
absently kicking back and forth. She knew he'd be okay, but a small voice kept
saying he might not be. Buffy didn't know the guy with the zombies, but he was
obviously someone dangerous. And Gabby? Buffy barely knew the girl, and the
fact that she and Angel had some connection from the past bothered her. What
was Gabby? How did she know Angel?
  Buffy's musings were interrupted by Giles bringing out a big leather-bound
book, marked with a large red tooling of a wolf on its cover. Upon closer
inspection, the wolf's image seemed to be entangled with thorny vines. Giles
pushed his glasses up and laid the book on the table next to Buffy.
  "What's that?" Willow asked, coming forward for a look at the tome.
  "A book I was given years ago, a very rare book." Giles replied. He sniffed
a bit and opened the book. "It's a prophecy and a journal about a person named
the Protector."
  "That guy with the zombies had called Gabby 'The Protector' before we ran
off," Xander put in. "Any connections?"
  Giles nodded. He flipped a few pages into the book to reveal what looked
like a family tree. "If what you've told me is correct, this is your friend
right here." Giles pointed to one name, Gabrielle Angel, born 1860. There were
no other names after hers.
  "Whoa, wait a sec here. This can't be her." Xander commented, crossing his
arms over his chest. "Gabby's our age, she can't possibly have been born over
a century ago."
  "Maybe her family named her after this woman in the book." Willow guessed.
She turned to Giles. "But you said this book was rare."
  Giles nodded again. "This is the only copy."
  The three teens stood in silence. Buffy finally broke it with a question.
  "So who is the Protector?"
  "The Protector is the sworn guardian of the Slayer. He or she is born the
Protector and says as such until death." Giles started. "They are a bloodline
of werewolves who were saved centuries ago by a Slayer. They pledged their
children would protect the Slayers and their descendants till the Slayer faced
no threat."
  "So Gabby's a...werewolf?" Willow said more than asked. She shuddered a bit
and Giles continued.
  "The last Protector was named Gabrielle Angel. She was only seventeen when
the burden fell to her." He flipped through the book some more, nudging his
glasses back up his nose. "All it says in here is that she failed."
  Buffy swallowed an eerie feeling. Failed. "So that means..."
  "Yes." Giles replied. "She'd let a Slayer get killed. Two, actually."
  The teenagers looked at each other. "Spike," was all Xander said. They
looked back to Giles.
  "Yes, and as the prophecy went, the Protector was not allowed to pass on the
burden to another Protector if he or she had failed. So that would explain why
your friend is here now." Giles closed the book and looked at Buffy.
  "It would explain how Gabby and Angel know each other." Willow said quietly.
"They must have fought a few times in the past."



- -

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 20:22:47 -0500
From: "Jim Heverling" <[e-mail]>
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Silent Night -all

Title: Silent Night

Summary: A mysterious guy is after Buffy and Angel=20
won't stop until he finds him. (this is my first completed fanfic so if y=
ou
don't like it i understand)

Note: this story is kind of short

Disclaimer: Buffy, Xander, Willow, Giles, and Angel  belong to Joss Whedo=
n
and not to me.

rating: G

              SILENT NIGHT...

Buffy walked into her house, dropped her things on the table, and ran up =
to
her room. She picked up her phone and dialed Angel's number.=20
"Hello?", Angel's voice picked up.
"How did I know you'd be home?", Buffy asked.=20
"Very funny. So what do you want?"
"Meet me here at sunset", she requested.
"OK. Any reason why?", Angel asked.
"No. Just be here."
Buffy hung up.

        "Now what should I wear?", she thought.
Buffy rummaged through her closet frustrated. By the time she was done, s=
he
had only an hour to kill. Buffy sat on the couch and channel surfed until
her thumb hurt. All of a sudden, someone rang the doorbell. Buffy glanced
at her watch.
"Right on time", she said quietly.
    =20
         She fixed her hair as she walked to the door. When she opened th=
e
door she said, "Hi=85".
No one was there.
Just before she closed the door someone grabbed her by the back of the
throat and dragged her into the kitchen. He threw her over his head onto
the island in the middle of the kitchen, knocking over a basket of fruit.
She was knocked unconscious.=20

          As he searched the drawers for a knife, Angel walked in puzzled
to see Buffy lying on the counter. He saw the mysterious man run quickly
out the door. Angel looked outside but the man was nowhere to be seen.

         He remembered Buffy and carried her up to her room.
"What is that smell?", Angel thought.
Candles were scattered evenly throughout the room.
"Did Buffy start collecting candles or what?"
He set Buffy on her bed. He pulled a chair up next to her and held her
hand.=20
"Looks like this place is ready for a seance", he thought as he looked
around.

         Angel thought about the incident in the kitchen.
"Who was that guy? Why did he want to kill Buffy? He's not a vampire."
Just then, Buffy squeezed his hand. He leaned closer,
"Buffy, are you ok?"
"Huh? Oh yea. Fine. Except for this agonizing pain in my back I'm just
peachy."
"Do you want ice?", Angel asked.
"Please?"
Buffy leaned forward and moaned loudly. Angel pushed her back.
"Better not try that again. I'll be back", Angel said.

        Angel fulfilled his task as ice boy and returned to Buffy's room.
"Here it is", he said to an empty room.
"Buffy?"
Angel felt a cold draft brush by him. Then he realized the window was ope=
n.
He saw someone running outside but he was too far away to know if he was
the killer.
____________________
        He grabbed his jacket, threw the ice in the sink, turned off the
lights, and ran out the door. Might as well be on the safe side since he
didn't know when Mrs. Summers would be home.

        Outside, Angel ran left and carefully searched the area. Nothing.
He made a sharp right and heard a scream nearby. He ran toward it and saw=
 a
shadow run past bushes and into a business complex. At this hour the
building would be practically empty. A perfect setting for a good game of
hide and seek.

      Angel ran inside and walked through the revolving doors. Acting
casually, he walked to the elevators and pushed the up button. The elevat=
or
opened and Angel pressed 2 saying,
"Next floor please."

      The elevator opened to the second floor. He looked left and right b=
ut
saw no one.
"Two down. Two to go."
Angel entered the elevator again for the third floor. As the elevator
reached the next floor, he smelled something familiar. Blood. He ran left
when the doors opened. He ran in to a small office and a thought popped
into his mind as he opened the door.=20
"What do I do when I find this guy?"
He walked into the room. Nothing appeared to be in the room, but Angel kn=
ew
better. The closet. He slowly  made his way to the closet. He opened the
door and the man automatically sprung out. He kicked Angel in the stomach
and headed for the door. Angel ran and slammed the door on his fingers.
"Ya picked the wrong girl for you victim, pal."
Angel swung his fist back and punched him in the jaw.
"That should keep you out of the way for a while", Angel said looking at
the unconscious man on the floor.

                 Angel ran to the closet and saw Buffy laying on the floo=
r.
"You ok?", Angel asked.
"Yea. He cut my hand but my back feels a little better."
Angel put his arms out for Buffy to lean on. Buffy got up very slowly.
"How 'bout we go to back to your house and try that ice thing again?", he
suggested smiling.
"Sure but ahh=85what about him?"
"What about him? They'll find him. Eventually.
"Whatever. Let's go."

              They walked home and Angel got the ice finally. He brought
the ice up to her room.
"Thanks. Could you get me something?", Buffy asked.
"Sure. What?", Angel answered.
"Open that drawer over there", she said pointing across the room.
"Top drawer on the right."
He opened the drawer.
"That's it."

           Angel pilled out a big box wrapped beautifully.
He walked back reading the tag,
TO: ANGEL
FROM: BUFFY
When he reached the bed he pulled out a small box from his jacket and
handed it to her.
"And I thought you forgot", Buffy said.
"I can't make it too easy for you now can I?", Angel replied.
"Happy Anniversary", she said.
"Happy Anniversary", he replied.

           The next day in the library, Buffy saw Giles sitting at a tabl=
e
reading with Willow and Xander looking over his shoulder.
"What's goin on?", Buffy asked puzzled.
"Last night some psychotic guy escaped from the nut house. The doctors sa=
id
he had been there for at least 2 years. They said he used to talk about a
movie he saw once. A killer went around killing people by cutting their
voiceboxs out. I guess he was inspired," Xander explained.
"He killed three people like that. The police found him dead at the
Schuykill
 Mall ", Willow said.
"Weird", Buffy replied.

Send all comments to me, Catie, at [e-mail]




- -

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 21:33:29 EST
From: [e-mail] (Ingrid E Stanton)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Buffyfic

This is ingrid. Question: Did everybody get digest #92? For some reason,
I didn't get it. People keep sending me comments on the story I posted,
so you guys all must have gotten it. What's going on here? I feel so
deprived without my Buffyfic! Write to me if you got #92, please, and
send it to me.
- --Ingrid Elizabeth
<[e-mail]>

- -

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 21:00:16 -0600 (CST)
From: [e-mail] (Perri Smith)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Ill MEt By Moonlight, Part 18 of 19

See standard disclaimer in part 1. Comments.compliments/flames
accepted/enjoyed/ignored at [e-mail]

Ill Met By Moonlight (18/19)
By Perri Smith
Copyright 1998

Part 17

Sasha positioned them on instinct, listening to the force that nudged her
from inside with knowledge she'd never acquired. Herself on the point of
the pentacle, Angel to one side, Buffy to the other, facing each other.
After a short conversation with herself, she asked Giles to take one of the
bottom points. The other point took more thought. Finally, she looked at
the two teenagers still keeping their distance. "Willow? I need you to
stand next to Giles."

Willow blinked and Xander immediately protested, "No way. If you need
someone, I'll do it."

Sasha grinned at him in spite of herself; he was awfully cute when he was
protective. Willow evidently felt the same way, judging from her bright
smile up at him. But there wasn't time to tease him. "It has to be Willow,
Xander. My grandmother can't handle this kind of spell anymore, and you and
Greg and Van are pretty much null power, as far as I can tell; you wouldn't
do me any good. Willow should be able to help Giles ground us. I don't
think there'll be any danger."

"Don't think?"

She couldn't quite meet his suspicious eyes. "It's not like I've done this
before."

"It's okay, Xander," Willow said quietly, touching his arm. "I'll be fine."
She crossed the warehouse floor and calmly took her place next to Giles.
Her brave front was only slightly shaken by how hard her hands were
trembling.

Sasha looked at them, arranged around the wolf, who had long since given up
fighting and now crouched in the center eyeing them balefully, waiting for
any chance, any break. She wasn't about to give him one.

She took a deep breath, and took her place at the point of the pentacle. A
quick gesture, and the candles that marked the points suddenly flared up,
drawing a quick, hastily smothered gasp from Willow.

"Will?" Buffy asked, worried. Angel and Giles were also watching Willow
with concern, and Xander looked as if he was just barely restraining
himself from yanking her out.

Willow shook her head and forced a smile. "I'm fine. Let's go."

Sasha nodded. "All right. Here we go." As she closed her eyes, she sensed
Greg gesturing to the other two guys, heard them spread out to surround the
circle, ready to interfere the second anything went wrong. She smiled to
herself, buoyed by their presence.

Her breathing steadied, slowed. As if from far away, she heard her
grandmother clap once, twice, three times. The three guys picked up the
rhythm and Sasha's breathing took on the pattern. She started the first
words of the ritual Giles and her grandmother had cobbled together, a
patchwork of Latin, Magyar and Romani verses.

The candles flared again, higher; she saw the flames without having to open
her eyes. With the unseen light came touches she couldn't feel -- Angel on
one side of her, dark and light fighting for dominance, with light somehow
keeping control. She took the power he had to offer, good or bad, and used
it. From the other side came pure light -- Buffy, the Slayer, with all the
power of the Chosen One. Further away were Giles and Willow, without the
fierce aura of the other two, but with steady strength of their own, ready
to be leaned on.

The pattern of the words speeded up and Sasha followed it. One deep breath
between verses -- then she pulled the magic to her.

Vampire met Slayer met Watcher met Gypsy and the world exploded. Sasha's
head flared with light and dark, with sounds and thoughts and images that
were not her own. An Irish boy gazed into the eyes of a blond woman and
made a choice that was no choice at all. A blonde girl watched helplessly
as an older man faced a demon, then cried holding his body. A young man
called a demon to him, then could only watch as it destroyed what he loved.
A redheaded girl opened a door and a body tumbled out of it, face pale in
death and neck still dripping blood. A Gypsy girl stood before a bonfire
and called down a curse....

It flowed over her, around her, and she struggled to keep it from carrying
her away. It fought her at every turn, fought itself as she tried force
powers never meant to even touch to join. She brought them under control,
wrestling them into tangible shape and form through sheer willpower and the
strength of her voice. The magic was close enough to touch -- she could
feel it falling into place....

Then another surge of power jumped into the assault, bringing with it
malice and hatred and the longing to hurt, to kill. The werewolf took his
last chance, and Sasha felt it rip the control from her hands, as the
powers ripped themselves apart, and started to take her with them. The
candles flared out wildly, catching the floor beneath them on fire, but she
was too busy to worry about it. From far away, she heard one of the others
cry out, and grabbed frantically for them, trying to hold on. But even as
she caught them, they were torn away. Then the wolf came for her, and,
trapped in the whirlwind of power, she had nowhere to run.

*Can't even do this right,* she thought wildly, with some distant part of
her brain, the part that wasn't clinging desperately to herself. *I'm so
sorry....*

She felt herself tearing into a thousand pieces, and screamed....

*NO!* Something caught her, pulled her back with a painful, jarring rush,
binding her so closely she couldn't be torn away. Angel's anger and will,
channeled by the curse that had bound them since before her birth, ripped
through the chaos, and she took it like a lifeline, weaving her own fear
and determination into it.

Offered instead of forced, their powers merged, and reached out.

Buffy joined them effortlessly, a bond of another kind drawing her to
Angel. Her stubbornness and courage added their power, and it was almost
too much; it nearly slipped away again as the world flared white. The wolf
howled and battered at them again, trying to force its way through.

Then Giles and Willow were suddenly there, taking what Sasha didn't need
and channeling it safely away, adding calm and trust, wisdom and innocence
to the spell. Control returned and with it consciousness and Sasha realized
she was still chanting, although the words had long since stopped being
those of the ritual. She wasn't worried; for the first time, she knew
exactly what she was doing.

The magic rose, tamed but not broken, and Sasha told it what she wanted.
And, dancing wildly in the flames around them, it obeyed.

*****

*God, I *hate* Gypsies!* When Angel's thoughts were his own again, that was
the one that kept swimming to the surface. *And I really, *really* hate
magic.*

His head was spinning, his eyes weren't quite working properly, and he had
a headache. He would have been quite happy to stand just where he was, eyes
closed, mind mostly refusing to function, except that someone moaned from a
few feet away. *Buffy,* his sluggish mind realized. His body was faster;
his eyes snapped open as he lunged across the pentacle, catching Buffy as
she sank bonelessly to her knees.

She was pale and limp in his arms; he held her up with what strength he had
left, which wasn't much. Her eyes opened slightly as he smoothed her hair
away from her face. Amazingly, she smiled up at him, and whispered, "Did we
do it?"

"I'm... not sure," he answered honestly, and looked away from her long
enough to find out.

Sasha was right where he'd left her, and in even worse shape than Buffy.
Her cousins were the only thing holding her off the floor; her eyes were
shut, her head falling forward as if she didn't have the strength to hold
it up. Across from her, Willow and Giles were in better shape; Giles was
sitting down, head between his knees, and Willow was clinging to Xander,
but still on her feet. Xander didn't look as if he was going to let go any
time soon.

And in the middle of the pentagram sprawled a human form dressed in nothing
more than the ragged remain of pants and shirt, both nearly unrecognizable
as such. He looked like nothing, just an ordinary man; then he lifted his
head, and Angel saw the wolf still in them.

"Damn you!" he hissed, pulling himself to all fours. "Damn you!" His voice
rose to a howl, but it was a human sound, not lupine. "I had it! Power,
glory, death in my hands! And you stole it away!"

Angel surprised the hell out of himself by smiling wryly. "The Romani
giveth and the Romani taketh away."

"Blessed be the name of the Romani," Buffy finished with him, struggling to
sit up and echoing his twisted grin.

"Only if you can pronounce it, and now you've got *her* saying it wrong,"
Sasha groaned, but with an edge of humor sneaking through the disgust. Greg
and Xander were both snickering, and if their stifled laughter verged on
the edge of hysteria, Angel wasn't going to hold it against them. He was,
in fact, giving serious thought to joining them. Buffy had already given
in, her helpless giggles shaking her body.

Kriston's expression contorted still further at their amusement at his
expense, and he made it to his feet, staggering, his face deformed with a
mask of hatred. "Go ahead, laugh!" he told them, sneering. "You took away
my power, but I'm still here. And if you thought your life was hard before,
you Gypsy bitch," he told Rani Lakatosh, standing as regally as a queen
behind her great-grandchildren, "then wait until you see what I'll do to
you now."

"You can no longer hurt us," the old woman informed him calmly, and Angel
suddenly remembered another old woman, standing before him saying those
same words, as the agony of awareness raged through him. For a moment, he
almost felt sorry for Kriston.

A very *short* moment, as Kriston took another step forward. "Oh, I can
hurt you," he promised, low and threatening. "I'll make you bleed, I'll see
your clan die. Starting with her!"

Angel knew his warning was too late, even as he shouted it. With Buffy's
weight on his arms, he couldn't move fast enough to do anything else, as
Kriston abruptly lunged for Sasha, his eyes completely insane. Her cousins
were too surprised to protect her, Sasha too tired to even flinch -- she
was easy prey as the madman's outstretched hands went for her throat--

- --and came back to clutch at his own as he fell in a gasping, writhing heap
to the floor a few inches from Sasha's knees. Her cousins recovered at
last, jumping in front of Sasha to grab Kriston's arms, immobilizing him.
Suddenly forced to support herself, Sasha nearly took a nosedive, until
Rani Lakatos knelt and caught her.

Sasha leaned against her , looking at the struggling, spitting, choking
Kriston. "Do you think I'm *stupid*, Kriston?" she asked, with the
tonelessness of someone who was too exhausted to spend effort on emotion.
"Do you think I don't know what you are now?"

He stared at her with helpless fury, panting , and twisted against his
captors. Greg and Van held on grimly.

Sasha shook her head, letting it fall back against her grandmother's
shoulder.  The old woman tightened her arms protectively around her. "When
I lifted the curse, I also laid a geas, your Royal Wolfness," Sasha
continued. "And if you ever again try to hurt someone, if you even *think*
about killing, whatever you've imagined will turn back on you threefold.
Every bit of pain, every drop of blood, will be visited on you three times
over."

She opened her eyes, and fixed them on him, and even Angel flinched back a
little from the look in them. "And if you ever touch my clan again," she
promised, "if you come near anyone here tonight, I will not screw around
anymore. I will kill you."

Kriston met her eyes defiantly, but there was fear in them now. He looked
around at the others, and Angel let the demon look out of his face,
snarling for emphasis. Kriston's face blanched with terror and Angel smiled
in satisfaction, then pulled Buffy closer as the former werewolf collapsed
in a quivering heap. He wasn't a threat anymore; it was over.

"So, what are we going to do with him?" he heard Willow ask from behind
him. "I mean, he's not a wolf anymore, but he's still a bad guy. We can't
just let him go."

Surprisingly, it was Xander who answered. "Dump him back at that hotel he
was registered in and the cops will get him. They still want him for
killing that guy outside town; they'll pick him up, haul him to the loony
bin if he tells the truth, and to jail if he lies. Either way, problem
solved."

Angel decided he hadn't been giving the kid enough credit for deviousness,
not to mention ruthlessness. Judging from Buffy's wide eyes as she stared
over Angel's shoulder at her friend, she hadn't either.

Sasha laughed hollowly, and gestured at her cousins. "You heard him, guys;
make yourselves useful."

"No problem," Greg said, pulling Kriston to his feet with Van's help and
somehow managing to bow at the same time. "At your service, Rani
Chov-hani."

"Die, Gregor." Sasha sighed heavily and rolled her eyes at their back as
they dragged Kriston out. "Do one lousy favor for family...." she muttered
under her breath and Angel laughed.



- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Perri <[e-mail]>      I *am* the Buffy Evangalist!
NatPacker-*-Horsechick-*-Pezhead-*-Cohenhead-*-DDEB2-*-AGA-*-SunS-*-CoJ
"GOD, it's going to be so weird.  "Oh, look, David's cute... arrrrgh!
Hate Angelus, hate Angelus!!!"  Lust/hate relationships are *so*
difficult..."  -- Lizbet



- -

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 21:01:22 -0600 (CST)
From: [e-mail] (Perri Smith)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Ill MEt By Moonlight, part 19 of 19

See standard disclaimer in part 1. Comments.compliments/flames
accepted/enjoyed/ignored at [e-mail]

Ill Met By Moonlight (19/19)
By Perri Smith
Copyright 1998

Epilogue

Buffy nearly fell asleep sitting up.

Not a big surprise; they'd been out until nearly 2 a.m. cleaning up the
warehouse as well as they could and getting rid of the last of the spell
pentacle. Most of the Romani contingent had headed for parts unknown --
Greg had said something cryptic about a Winnebago -- leaving the
Slayerettes to escort each other back to the library since almost everyone
involved in the spell was still too weak to walk alone. All of them were
going to be completely useless at school tomorrow... today.

"It was really weird," Xander was saying now, gesturing from his seat at
the table. Everyone else was gathered there, slumped in any position that
didn't require movement or effort. Only Angel was still up, prowling
restlessly around the room. But the aftermath from the spell had one good
effect; he and Sasha were too tired to fight.

"One second, all of you were just, like, standing there and Sasha was doing
the chant thing." Buffy considered doing damage to Xander, who had entirely
too much hyper energy to suit her. He kept talking gesturing wildly with
his hands, and she concluded it would be too much work. "Then Werewolf Dude
suddenly just stood up and started howling. I figured he was going to go
for us, then everyone froze, and the candles went crazy and set the floor
on fire. But Sasha just kept going and then.. poof. No more fire, no more
werewolf. It was *majorly* weird. I can't believe you guys don't remember
any of it!"

"Well, I remember some of it," Willow protested from the seat next to him.
She looked tired, but the color was already starting to come back to her
cheeks. "I remember these bright lights and I remember seeing stuff, but I
don't remember what it was."

"You don't want to," Sasha told her soberly, leaning against the other side
of the table. "Trust me, I'd rather forget. And not just because of the
damn headache." She rubbed irritably at her forehead. "My grandmother calls
it backlash from handling all of that wild energy. I call it the migraine
from hell."

Buffy winced sympathetically, her own head not much happier. "Do you think
the cops have found Kriston yet?"

"If not, they will in the morning," Sasha shrugged. "The way the guys left
him, he's not going anywhere." Thinking back to Kriston's mostly-naked,
nearly-catatonic state, Buffy had to agree. "And I'm betting when they
check into Kriston's bank accounts in Santa Rosa, they'll find all kinds of
other interesting things to charge him with. Like those burglaries he set
Greg up with." Sasha's smile was grim. "Maybe there is some justice."

"All of you did an excellent job," Giles concluded, with an approving pat
to Buffy's shoulder and another to Sasha's. The Gypsy looked startled, then
gratified.

"I.. couldn't have done it without you guys," she stuttered slightly.
"Thanks for everything."

"Well, you're welcome," Buffy informed her cheerfully, feeling much more
charitable towards her now that all of the dangerous parts were over. "If
it's all the same to you, though, I'd rather not do this again. Like,
ever."

"You and me both," Sasha sighed, returning her smile.

"Ah, somewhat along those lines," Giles interrupted the moment of mutual
accord, "I have, ah, something of a gift for you, Sasha." He fumbled around
behind the main desk, and pulled out a small, leather bound book, holding
it out towards Sasha. She walked over to take it and the others -- except
Angel -- trailed behind, curious.

"What's this?" Sasha asked, opening the book; looking over her shoulder,
Buffy saw that they were only blank pages.

"Not you usual style of book, Giles," she commented dubiously. "Unless you
freed another demon or something. Long story," she added at Sasha's curious
look.

Giles spared only a quick Look at Buffy, before returning his very serious
attention to Sasha. "It's what's called a Book of Shadows; at least, it
could be. Many witches keep them -- a record of information gathered,
spells cast, lessons learned, that sort of thing. I... thought you might
find it useful."

Sasha bit her lip and looked down, then flipped through the book, stopping
at the first page, which had something in Giles' handwriting that looked
like poetry. Her brow wrinkled, then she read,

"Eight words does this Rede fulfill:
An ye harm none, do as ye will.
And ever mind the Rule of Three:
What ye send out, comes back to thee.
Follow this with mind and heart,
And merry ye meet, and merry ye part."

She looked back up at Giles. "What does that mean?"

"It's part the Wiccan Rede, the rules many witches live by -- the, ah,
'white' witches, that is." He looked faintly embarrassed. "I thought.... It
might provide a... well, something of a guide...."

"To keep me from repeating my mistakes?" Sasha finished wryly, then sighed.
"I know, Romani aren't big on ethics towards outsiders. I can't... I  have
to be more careful."

She looked back down at the book, tracing a finger over the text, copied in
Giles's firm handwriting. "'An' ye harm none, do as ye will.' Well, I guess
there are worse rules for life than that."

Giles smiled, openly relieved, and Sasha grinned wryly up at him. "What,
you thought I was a total idiot? I try not to make the same fatal mistake
more than two or three times."

"I never thought you an idiot at all," Giles assured her. "In fact..." He
trailed off, obviously trying to figure out how to phrase something. "The
curse you cast, a month ago... Your grandmother was telling me about the
ritual, earlier, but she was uncertain of her translation. Can you tell me
what it was you cast?"

Sasha bit her lip, then reluctantly recited:

"Earth and water, air and fire
Moon's enchantment, wind's desire
Lend thy power to my will
Stars to hold thee by my skill"

"Mortal deeds cast mortal fall
Soul shapes form at moonlight's call
What you are so shall you be
As I will, so mote it be."

There was silence when she finished, then Xander raised his hand. "How come
it rhymes in English?"

Sasha gave him a Look, but smiled slightly. "It didn't rhyme in Romani,
Xander. The translation is the result of a month with way too much time on
my hands and only one thing on my mind."

"But you're sure of it," Giles persisted. "The second half, in particular?"

"Yeah," Sasha shrugged. "Believe me, I've had a lot of time to replay it."
She didn't add the 'in my nightmares', but Buffy heard it anyway.

Giles nodded. "Then I believe I can set your guilt at rest, at least a bit.
Your grandmother was telling the truth when she said she hadn't intended
for the curse to create a werewolf. The curse's purpose was to give outer
form to the victim's inner self -- to turn him into what he already was, in
his soul."

"'Soul shapes form'," Sasha repeated, slowly. She looked as if she wanted
to believe Giles, but couldn't quite get far enough past the guilt to let
herself. "'What you are, so shall you be...' He became a killer because he
already was one?"

Giles nodded. "A bit simplistic, but yes." He leaned forward, as if he
could make Sasha believe him by sheer proximity. "You did not create a
murderer, Sasha; at worst, you only gave him the ability. He could not have
become the werewolf -- he could not have become evil, if the evil had not
already been within him."

Sasha stared at him, then, slowly, she nodded. "That doesn't make me any
less responsible for what he did with what I gave him," she said quietly.

"No," Giles agreed, just as quietly. "But neither does it leave the blood
on your hands alone.  And someday, perhaps, it will help you forgive
yourself."

She almost smiled and he returned it, laying a hand on her shoulder as he
would one of the Slayerettes. Buffy looked away, suddenly uncomfortable.
Then Giles cleared his throat, and lifted his hand to shove nervously at
his glasses. "And, of course," he continued, in his professional Watcher
tone, "should you require any help in your studies, any assistance your
clan can not provide..."

"I'll know who to come to." Sasha carefully tucked her book into the crook
of her arm. "I'd better get my stuff together; Greg and Van will bring the
transportation around any minute, and if I'm not waiting they'll give me
grief."

"I'll help," Buffy volunteered, trailing after the Gypsy with one last look
at Angel, still keeping his distance, and another look at Giles. He kept
doing things to surprise her....

Sasha hadn't had that much stuff to begin with, and even less now; it only
took a few minutes to gather the clothes that weren't torn, bloody and
otherwise ruined and shove them into Sasha's duffel bag. They worked in
peaceful silence until the duffel was closed.

Then Buffy finally asked, quietly, "It was pretty close, wasn't it."

Sasha's hands paused for a moment; then, deliberately, she fastened the
straps of the bag. "Yeah. It was real close. I almost lost the spell; it
would have killed me for sure; I'm not sure what it would have done to the
rest of you." She sighed and shook her head. "It was real damn close."

Buffy swallowed hard. "Let's definitely not do it again."

"Yeah." Sasha slung the bag over her shoulder and turned towards the door
- -- to find Angel standing there, still and quiet, his face impassive. Sasha
stopped dead, and Buffy held her breath. Anything could happen here.....

****

Sasha faced Angel, meeting his eyes steadily. The Gypsy instincts, the old
hatred, called for attention and attack, but it was a little easier to
ignore them now. A little.

"I guess I have to thank you, too," she said instead, "Since you saved my
life and all." The words were grudging, out of habit or pride, she wasn't
sure which. But they were sincere enough, in their own way.

Angel shook his head, still with no expression. "Call it... paying off an
old debt. We're even. Unless you decide to start jerking me around with
that damn geas again. Then all bets are off."

Sasha blinked at him, utterly confused, and realized he didn't know. He
didn't realize.... "There is no more geas, Angel. Not anymore. You broke
it."

That finally cracked his shell. "What?" Buffy echoed his startled question
only half a beat behind.

"You broke it," Sasha repeated, starting to see the humor in the situation.
It wasn't every day you could catch both a vampire and a Slayer
flat-footed. "Apparently you weren't listening to the terms of the curse."

"I was kind of distracted at the time," Angel said irritably. "What terms?"

Sasha grinned sardonically. "The geas could be broken in two ways -- your
death, or when you atoned for your crime by saving the life of one of the
elders or their chov-hani descendants, at risk of your own. I'm the last in
that line, and you most definitely saved my skin, and almost got toasted in
the process." She gestured widely. "Poof. No more geas."

"I didn't have a choice about saving you," Angel protested. "The geas--"

"-- was to serve, not to save," Sasha completed his sentence, crossing her
arms and looking down at him with her eyebrows raised. "Giles, Grandmother
and I double-checked the terms of the contract.. um, curse, while we were
cleaning up to be sure. You could have stood back, let the werewolf kill
me, but instead, you saved me -- so the geas was broken."

She sighed, folding her arms tightly around herself. "Your soul is entirely
yours again, for what it's worth. No vampires keeping you on a leash, no
Gypsies yanking your chain. Which is how it's supposed to be, I guess.
Responsibility. What a concept." She stared off into space for another
second, reflecting on her own new-found responsibilities, then looked back
at Angel, dredging up something closer to her usual sarcasm. "Try not to
screw up again, huh?"

He didn't react to the sarcasm; in fact, he didn't say anything for a long,
long minute, until Giles poked his head into the office. "Sasha? Your
grandmother is here. She and your cousins are apparently ready to leave."

Sasha tightened her grip on her duffel and on reality. "It's about damn
time. You'd think they parked back in Santa Rosa." She lifted one
disdainful eyebrow at Angel. "If Fang Boy here will get out of my way, I'll
get out of your hair."

"Anything to make you leave," Angel returned, standing aside. She had to
stop herself from smiling; it was much easier to fight with a vampire than
talk to one.

Her grandmother was waiting in the library, looking over Willow's shoulder
as the teenager explained something about the computer, all traces of
exhaustion gone with the joy of demonstrating her favorite toy. Her
grandmother was nodding thoughtfully, and Sasha made a mental bet with
herself on how long it would take to be asked advice on buying computers.
How they were going to run power to it from the Winnebago, she had no idea,
but that was Greg and Van's problem.

But, "A useful machine," was all her grandmother said when she looked up.
"I believe I will like them. Are you ready, Sasha?"

"Yes, ma'am," Sasha answered, moving as far away from Angel as possible.
Truces were all well and good, but she still didn't like him, and the
feeling was certainly still mutual.

"Where are you going to go now?" Giles asked

"Back to law school," Sasha shrugged. "I've got finals coming up. Then... I
guess I'll go back to my Clan for a while, if they'll accept me. There
aren't many chov-hani left, apparently; I've got magic to learn, vampires
to kill, that kind of thing. You understand," she finished with a sideways
look at Angel. He rolled his eyes, but didn't look exactly upset.

Buffy grinned. "If you need any tips on that part, come look for me."

"I will. See you around, Will, Xander." The two Slayerettes said their
goodbyes, Willow with a bright smile, Xander with a pseudo-macho
half-salute, and Sasha debated hugging Giles just to see if he'd blush, but
settled for a handshake.

When she turned back to her grandmother, she found her standing in front of
Angel, staring calmly up at him. Angel's jaw was locked again, but he was
standing his ground, returning her look evenly.

"I was only a very small child when you came to our camp, Angelus," her
grandmother finally said, her accent heavier from fatigue or memories. "But
the girl you killed was my eldest sister, and I remember her death well."

Angel flinched, but only said, "I remember it, too. Believe me, I remember."

"And regret it. I see it in your eyes." Her grandmother nodded, as if a
question had been answered, and walked a step closer to Angel, fearlessly.
"It was not our intention to gift that night, Angelus, but to punish. If
you also learned, as it seems you have, then we did better than we knew.
Perhaps... perhaps there has been payment enough."

She stepped back, and looked him up and down. "I thank you for my
great-granddaughter's life, Angel. And I wish you good fortune -- you and
the Slayer. Your debt to those who are Clan Lakatos is paid."

Without waiting for an answer, she turned and left, head high and spine
straight, never looking back. Sasha shook her head, and sighed heavily.
"And I'm supposed to follow that act.  I was wrong; there *is* no justice."

She started for the door in her grandmother's wake, but she stop and did
look back. "Angel? For what it's worth -- thank you."

Angel's jaw worked with some emotion Sasha couldn't quite interpret. "For
what it's worth," he answered finally, "you're welcome."

Gypsy and vampire stood in the silence of an uneasy truce; then Sasha
Lakatos turned and left, the library doors swinging shut behind her.


Finis

- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Perri <[e-mail]>      I *am* the Buffy Evangalist!
NatPacker-*-Horsechick-*-Pezhead-*-Cohenhead-*-DDEB2-*-AGA-*-SunS-*-CoJ
"GOD, it's going to be so weird.  "Oh, look, David's cute... arrrrgh!
Hate Angelus, hate Angelus!!!"  Lust/hate relationships are *so*
difficult..."  -- Lizbet



- -

------------------------------

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