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buffyfic             Friday, April 3 1998             Volume 00 : Number 001




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Date: Fri, 3 Apr 1998 16:42:57 -0800
From: [e-mail] (Charity C Tran)
Subject: BUFFYFIC: Buffyfic: Chronicles of the White Knight (4/?)

Name: The Chronicles of the White Knight #4 Never the One
Author: Taygeta
Address: [e-mail]
Feedback: Please send
Uses in anything: Ask me first.
Spoiler: Not really, might have mentioned a past episode.
Description: Cordelia has a dream about Xander and Buffy
Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other
references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater
Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions,
Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox.
Warning: Not really, just kissing, and no major violence or foul
language.  So, PG
*********************
Chronicles of the White Knight
#4 Never the One
By: Taygeta

    "Are you sure, Cordelia?" asked Xander with a sigh as he cradled
the phone against his shoulder why pouring himself a glass of milk.

    "Of course, I'm sure, Xander," said Cordelia with a sigh after
some repetitive coughing, "Go to the dance with them.  Just because I'm
sick doesn't mean you can't go."

    "But Cordelia not going to a school dance seems wrong somehow,"
replied Xander placing the carton back into the refrigerator and closing
the door.

    "Yeah, but Xander not going to a dance won't make a difference,
now would it?" retorted Cordelia straightforwardly.

    "Well, if you put it that way - " Xander began, but he stopped,
"Look, Cordy, just try and get better, huh?  I mean, who else am I going
to argue with at school, and let's not forget, kiss and make-up with?"

    "It's not like I'm Buffy and can just slay this cold!" said
Cordelia with a laugh, "Hey, what's up with her and her clothes nowadays
anyway?  Don't you remember that thing she wore a few days ago?  You know
that blue thing?"

    Xander ignored her comments of Buffy, like he always did and with
a sigh he said, "Just get better, Cordy, huh?  And I'll see you as soon
as I can."

    Before Xander could hang up, he heard Cordelia's voice say, "Go
to the dance, Xander!  You don't have to stay home on my account."

    When he did hang up, Cordelia sighed, and felt her head throbbing
from her head cold.  She not only felt awful, but she knew she looked
just as awful.  Dropping her head onto her large white pillows, Cordelia
couldn't help, but wonder was Xander going to the dance or staying home?
She knew that despite all of what she had said to him to make him go the
dance she wanted to think that Xander would do something romantic like
stay with her and help her get better.  Cordelia shook her head and knew
that although Xander could be romantic, he wasn't when it came to her
most of the time, and most of time she even wondered if he knew if she
was alive.

    She yawned and thought that having a nice early nap would help
her get better.  Still, her thoughts were of Xander and Buffy, and she
was so worried about all of that that she fell into a troubling dream.  A
nightmare for her, but she knew that it was a dream beyond dreams for her
boyfriend who was in love with someone else...

    ...As she walked into the building, she realized that the Bronze
was a little more smoke-filled than it had been usually, but considering
that the dance was being held there, it wasn't unusual.  Oz and his band,
"The Dingoes Ate My Baby" played a slow song and Willow, as usual, was
gazing at Oz with a dreamy expression.  She was now an official groupie,
and she didn't mind that she didn't get to dance because her boyfriend
was in the band, more or less because she didn't like to dance.  Meaning,
that she thought that that was a plus in her new relationship.

    Cordelia peered at the table, noticing that Willow wasn't alone,
and that Xander and Buffy were seated beside her, laughing.  She walked
towards them, but when she sat down at their table, she was surprised
that they didn't even notice her.

    "Hey, guys, I came!"  Cordelia said in her normal voice, but
still no one saw her there.

    "Buffy, what do you say to dancing?" asked Xander suddenly,
standing up from his seat, and Cordelia saw Buffy smile.

    "I don't think so, Xander, I - " Buffy began as she shook her
head.

    "Go on, Buffy, dance with him," Willow said, tearing her eyes
away from Oz for a moment to urge Buffy to dance with Xander.

    Buffy sighed and smiled as she stood up, "Sure, Xander, I'd love
to dance with you."

    "Yes, Buffy, very enthusiastic," said Xander with a chuckle as he
and she walked to the dance floor.

    Cordelia frowned and scrutinized Buffy's clothing like she always
did.  That night, she was wearing a sleeveless dress made of a chiffon
material of lavender, like Cordelia had seen earlier that day in a
fashion magazine.  For the first time, Cordelia had no criticism and that
scared her, so she turned to give Xander a look, thinking she had to find
something wrong with Xander's clothes, she always did.  Tonight was no
exception; Xander had on all white and stood out in the crowd.  Then she
realized that it didn't matter that he stood out, he actually looked
good!

    Noticing that no one knew she was alive, she followed them to the
dance floor and was dying to hear their conversation.  She resented that
they always talked to each other, and it seemed, about everything.
Xander went out on vampire patrol with Buffy far too many times than
Cordelia liked.  She stood idly by, close enough to hear them, but far
enough so that she didn't feel weird just standing there.

    "So, Buffy, do I even get close to being your White Knight of
your dreams?"  Cordelia heard Xander say to Buffy.

    Cordelia remembered hearing Willow tell her about Buffy's dream
of the White Knight.  Willow had joked that Xander had thought that it
was himself before she had even begun explaining.

    "Well, my White Knight did dance closer," said Buffy with a light
smile, and Cordelia was shocked to see that they began to dance so close
that there wasn't even air between them.  "Something like this, yes, but
something's missing."

    "That tramp, she wouldn't," said Cordelia under her breath and
towards Xander she said, "That two-timing jerk, why I outta - " Despite
her angry remarks, Cordelia stood her ground and waited for the scene to
unfold.

    "You mean, this?"  Xander said and then their lips met, slightly
hesitant, and then they pulled away and just looked at each other.  Their
pounding hearts seemed to echo in Cordelia's head and just when she
thought their pulses had slowed, they kissed, again, and this time even
longer than before.

    Cordelia's jaw dropped, she had anticipated it, but she hadn't
prepared for it.  She was feeling very angry for two reasons.  The first,
Buffy and Xander, her boyfriend, had kissed each other, not once, but
twice.  Secondly, Xander had never kissed her like that, ever, and coming
to the second reason, she sighed.  A wave of depression hit her, as she
realized he probably would never kiss her like that, a kiss with such
passion that it meant love...

    ...She sat up right as she heard a knock on her door, and she
walked to the door wondering who there.  The crazy dream was still clear
in her mind when she opened the door.  She brushed her hair away from her
eyes as she saw who stood in front of her, Xander Harris.

    "Xander, what are you doing here?  Aren't you going to the
dance?" asked Cordelia with a surprised tone.

    "No, I'm not going to the dance.  What kind of an insincere
boyfriend do you think I am, Cordy?" asked Xander with a laugh as he
walked into her room, all the while holding a bag of rental tapes and a
large bag of popcorn.

    "The sweet kind," said Cordelia smiling as she began to look
through the various videos that he had rented and decided which one she
should complain about.

    As they watched the movie, Cordelia still didn't feel at ease
with the dream she had, although it was just a dream.  She couldn't get
rid of the mental picture of Xander and Buffy...kissing.  Cordelia feared
that it would cease to be just a dream, and would soon spill into
reality.  Sure, Xander was being nice and was lately being romantic and
showing major concern over her, but what value did she have in Xander's
heart?  Was she number two or number three?  The possibilities were
endless, but eliminating a number out of the possibilities was easy.
Cordelia knew that she could never occupy that reserved number in
Xander's heart, a soft spot where Buffy would always remain, the number
one.

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