Effective stimulation can be anything that arouses you. If it doesn’t arouse you, it is obviously not effective for you. Consequently, you may be very turned on by manual or oral stimulation before intercourse and feel very close to having an orgasm, but once intercourse starts, and the focus shifts to vaginal stimulation by the penis, you may experience a drop in your level of arousal. Although you may enjoy the physical and psychological experience of intercourse, you may not be able to reach orgasm. Again, this experience does not hold for all women, but a drop in excitement can occur because the kind of stimulation that was arousing you before intercourse was replaced by another kind when intercourse began.
