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Text File  |  1995-11-27  |  17KB  |  349 lines
  1.  
  2.  
  3.       o                                                     oo
  4.       oo                          ...                    oooo
  5.      ooooo                      (((  )`                o oooo
  6.      oo      o                ( )(((())(            o      oooo
  7.      oooo o    ooo           ( )( `..' ))         o     oooooooo
  8.       ooooo         ooo     ( )(`<@  @>'()      o          ooooo
  9.       oooo                 o)(( (  ..  ))(   o       @      oooo
  10.        oo         @         (())(`.().'(()o         @@@      oo
  11.         ooooo    @@@        ()(( ) `'& ))&           @    ooo
  12.          oo       @         &   )      (%  &               oo
  13.         oo          o      &   (&  * %  *%   &     o     ?   o
  14.        o   ?      o       &   &  & &  %&%     &     o   ??  oo
  15.        o o ??   o        &  & %       &&   &   &     ooo   oo
  16.         oo    ooo       &  &  %      &&      &  &     oooooo
  17.           oooooooo      & &   &      &        & &    ooooo
  18.              oooo       & &  &        &      &  &o    oo
  19.                 oo      & %o&     &  %  &    & &   o  o
  20.                    oo    &% &       &    &   %&     o
  21.                      oo o&% o&        &   &  %&      o
  22.                      oo %& % o&&       &    % &%     oo
  23.                    oo        o    &      & %  o     oo oo
  24.                   ooo        o      &     &%   o   o   ooo
  25.                 oo  o       o        %&    &     o     o  o
  26.               oo o   o  ooo         %  &   &      o    o   o
  27.             o    o     o              &    &       o       o
  28.            o    @      o           % &    &         o   @   o
  29.           o    @@@     o        %%% &    &          o  @@@  o
  30.           o  o  @     o        %    &   &           o   @   o
  31.            o o       o         %  % &  &            o       o
  32.            o  o    o           % %  & &              o   o   o
  33.            o ooo oo            %%  &  &               ooo o oo
  34.            oooooo               %  &  &                 oo ooo
  35.            oooo                      & &                  oooo
  36.            oo                         &&&                   oo
  37.            o                                                o
  38.  
  39. You got to know when to code 'em, know when to modem.
  40.  
  41.                                           .::::::'.::::::.
  42.  .::::.                                 ..:::;'`::::::'.::::.
  43.  :::::::.                            .::::;'   .::'.:;::::'.:;
  44.  :::'`:::                         .:::;'      .::::''   `:::::
  45.  ::'  `::.                       .:;'       .::::'       `:::;
  46.  ::    `::.                    .::;'       .:::;'         `::.
  47.  ::     `::.                  .::;'      .::::'            `:;
  48.  ::.     `::.  :  :          .:;'       .::;:'             :::
  49.  `::.     `::   :  :        .:;'      .::;:::.             ::;
  50.   :::.     ::.  : .:       .::;      .::;::::::::.       .::;'
  51.   ::::.    `::.  :::.     .:;'      .::'       `::::::::::::'
  52.   :::::.    `::. `:::   .:;'      .:::::.         `:::::::.
  53.   :: `:::.   `::: :::   .:;'      .::'  `:::.            `::.
  54.   ::   `:::.   `:::::. .:;'     .::'       `::.           `::.
  55.  .::      `::.   :::.:::'..  .::'           `::.         .::;
  56.  :::.    .::::::':::::::::::::::.            `::.       .::;'
  57.  `::::::::'    :::::::::::.    `::::::::.    .::::. .:::::;'
  58.          .:::::::'::.:::::::::.        `::::::::::::;'
  59.      .::::'.::::: ::: ::::.  `::::::.
  60.      ::' .::' ::  `::  :: `:::.       `:::.
  61.      :: .::'  ::   :'  `::  `::::::.    `::
  62.      ::.::'  .::        ::  ::'::'`:::::;;'
  63.       `:::   ::'        `::.:: `:::.`::;'
  64.        `::. .::          ::::.   `::;'
  65.         `:::::'          `:::::::;'
  66.  
  67.     |\
  68.     | \                /|    |\
  69. ----|-/--\_-----------/ |----|-\------------------|----------------------||
  70.     |/ \_ \)         /  |    |  \                 |                      ||
  71. ---/|---\)----------/---|----|---\----------------|----------------------||
  72.   /_|__    \_      /|   |    |   |\       |    |  |    |    |    |    |  ||
  73.  //-|--\-\_-\)----//|---|----|---|\\------|----|--|----|----|----|----|--||
  74. ||  |   | \)     // |   |    |   | \\     |    |  |    |    |    |    |  ||
  75. |-\-|---|-------|/--|---|----|---|--\|----|----|--|----|----|----|----|--||
  76.  \ \|  /        |   |  _|   _|   |   |   _|   _|  |   _|   _|   _|   _|  ||
  77. --\-|-/---------|--_|-(_)--(_)--_|---|--(_)--(_)--|--(_)--(_)--(_)--(_)--||
  78.    -|-         _| (_)   \__/   (_)  _|    |    |       |    |   _|   _|
  79.    /         -(_)-                -(_)-   |    |     -_|---_|--(_)--(_)
  80.   O                                      _|   _|     (_)  (_)
  81.                                        -(_)--(_)-
  82.  
  83.                   |\                |\                               |\
  84. ____|\__|_________|\\___|___________|___|____________|\_|____________|__|__
  85. ____|/__|________@__\|__|____O______|___|___@________|__|___|________|__|__
  86. ___/|___|___|________|__|___|______@____|__|____@____|__|___|_______@___|__
  87. __|_/_\_|___|_______@___|___|___________|__|___|____@___|___|___________|__
  88. ___\|/__|___|___________|___|___________|__|___|________|__O____________|__
  89.     /      O                                   |
  90.  
  91. Success is simply a matter of luck.  Just ask any failure.
  92.  
  93.           ___________________________________________,
  94.       ___/  ////////  \____/                         |
  95.      <__ |_////////__________________________________|
  96.        \)                 *                |________|
  97.         /        __________________________|
  98.        /        /  ||   //                         __-----__
  99.       /        /____\__//                       _--         --_
  100.      /        /~~~~~~~~~                       -               -
  101.     /        /                                -                 -
  102.    /        /                                -                   -
  103.    \-------/                                -                     -
  104.                                 ____-----/  -        /\ /\        -  \-----____
  105.                                 -----\_---_ -       //\'/\\       - _---_/-----
  106.                                         )_ -_-    ___\o|o/___    -_- _(
  107.                                           -  \--_-   _---_   -_--/  -
  108.                         ,'   ~   ',        -_   -    -___-    -   _-
  109.                        /;M, ;:;~,M;\         - __-   /===\   -__ -
  110.                       |;M;%~%`%~%;M;|             - -/((\-  -
  111.                        `/%:':%;';%\`              - |/  \|- -
  112.                        `%%:,:%:,:%%`             --\______/--
  113.                       /%%%`*`%`*`%%%\           -  _--||--_  -
  114.                ,_-~~--__,,_-~~~-_,,__--~~-_,     _-        -_
  115.              -'     ,,   -,      ,-   ,,    '-   -_   __   _-
  116.              ~    ,'-_    ~-____-~    _-',    ~  __-_-  -_-__
  117.             _-~       ~~-_,,,,,,,_-~~        ~-_
  118.              -_-~~_-~~-_,          ,_-~~-_~~-_-
  119.  `, ~-_,                  `      `
  120.    ~;  ;~_,               ;      ;
  121.    / ~-`,  ;              ;      ;
  122.   /`___; ~ :             ;        ;
  123.   `-,,; ,_-%;       ,-%%%%        %%%,
  124.        ~;%%%%:    -~%%%%;%        %%%%;
  125.          ;%%%%;,:~%%%%%%;%        %%%%;
  126.           :%%%%%%%%%%%%;%          %%%%;
  127.            ;%%%%%%%%,%-;%          %%%%;
  128.             ;%%%,%-~  ;%%          %%%%%;
  129.               ~~      ;%%          %%%%%;
  130.                       ;%%          %%%%%;
  131.                      ;%%            %%%%%;
  132.                      ;%%            %%%%%;
  133.                     ;%%              %%%%%;
  134.                     ;%%              %%%%%;
  135.                    ;%%                %%%%%;
  136.                    ;%%            ,_-~  ~``;
  137.                    ;%%            ,_-~  ~``;
  138.                    ;%%            ~-_,     :
  139.                   ;%%%                ;    ;
  140.                   ;%%%%               ; ; ;;
  141.                   ;%%%%%             %;,_-~
  142.                    ;%%%%%           %%%%%%;
  143.                    ;%%%%%%         %%%%%%;
  144.                     ;%%%%%%       %%%%%%;
  145.                      ;%%%%%%%   %%%%%%%;~-_,
  146.                       ;%%%%%%%I%%%%%%%;%%%%%%~--___,,,_%%%%_,,
  147.                       ;%%%%%%%|%%%%%%%;%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%~ ;
  148.                _-~~-__;%%%%%%%|%%%%%%%;,__-~~-%%%%%%-%_-~~~ -_,;
  149.               ;,_         ~~~~|~~~~          _,;
  150.               ;  ,-      __--~ ~--__      -,  ;
  151.                ~~__,,_-~~           ~~-_,,__~~
  152.  
  153.                @@@
  154.               u@@@b                                  Just taking a little
  155.             .$RMMMM$                                 pause from my hard job...
  156.            .$MMMMMMM$
  157.            $MMMMMMMM$r                    z$R$i
  158.           '$MMMMMMMMM$       u$RMM$r     '$MMMRr
  159.           4RMMMMMMMMM$      JRMMMMMMk    $RMM$$$
  160.          .$MMMMMMMMMM$     JRMMMMMMM$    3$MMMMMN
  161.         z$MMMMMMMMMMMM$.  x$MMMMMMMMM$    $MMMRR$
  162.       .$MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM$$$RMMMMMMMMMMM$e.  $MMMMMF
  163.       $MMMM. MMMMMMMMMM$MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMRRR$MMMM&
  164.       $MMMMMh MMMMMMMMM$MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM$
  165.       $MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM$MMMMMM$$$$$$$$8MMMMMMMMMMM
  166.       `BMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM$$8MMMMMMMMMMMMMM$MMMMMMMMMF
  167.       """**$$$$$$$$"""""""#*********RR$R$*#"""""""":
  168.      ~~~~~~~$$$~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~?##*#~~~~~~~~~~~:
  169.      ~~~~~~~$$$e~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  170.     ~~~~~~~d$$$$~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~^"""~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:
  171.     ~~~~~~~$$$$F~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  172.     ~~~"""~$$$$F~~~~~~~""~~~~^"""""""""'""'""""""~~~~~:
  173.    :~~~~~~~$$$$F~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  174.    `~~~~~~~^***~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
  175.  
  176. Every morning is the dawn of a new error.
  177.  
  178.                       | | / /
  179.                     \         /
  180.                    \__   ____  /
  181.                   /   \ /    \  |
  182.   /|             /     |      \ \
  183.  / |____________/     /        | |_____________/////////
  184. <  |____________|     |        |(______________       ()
  185.  \ |           /   () | ()     | |             \\\\\\\\\
  186.   \|           |    __|__      | |
  187.               _|___/___  \___  | |
  188.         __----         ----__\---\_
  189.        /                        __ |
  190.        \____-------------______/  \
  191.           \_____| /____________
  192.                 |/  |   |
  193.                     |   |
  194.  
  195.                    __---__                         ______
  196.                  /    ___\_             o  O  O _(      )__
  197.                 /====(_____\___---_  o        _(           )_
  198.                |                    \        (_  Voy por ti  )
  199.                |                     |@        (_   NENA  ! _)
  200.                 \       ___         /           (__        _)
  201.    \ __----____--_\____(____\_____/                (______)
  202.   ==|__----____--______|
  203.    /              /    \____/)_
  204.                 /        ______)
  205.                /           |  |
  206.               |           _|  |
  207.          ______\______________|______
  208.         /  Carlitos          *   *   \
  209.        /_____________*____*___________\
  210.        /   *     *                    \
  211.       /________________________________\
  212.       / *                              \
  213.      /__________________________________\
  214.           |                        |
  215.           |________________________|
  216.           |                        |
  217.           |________________________|
  218.  
  219.                            oo$$$$$$$ooo
  220.                         o$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$o
  221.                       o$$$$$$$""""""$$$$$$$o
  222.                      o$$$$$$"        ""$$$$$$
  223.                     o$$$$$"             $$$$$$
  224.                     $$$$$"               $$$$$
  225.                     $$$$$                $$$$$
  226.                     $$$$$                $$$$$
  227.                     "$$$$$              $$$$$$             o
  228.                      $$$$$$o          o$$$$$$             $"
  229.                       "$$$$$$$oooooo$$$$$$$$           oo$$
  230.                         ""$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$""        ooo$$$$$
  231.                    oooo$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
  232.               oo$$$$$$"""""""""$$$$"""""""""""$$$$$$$$$$$$$
  233.           o$$$$"""             $$$$                """"$$$$
  234.        o$$""                   $$$$                      "$$
  235.      $$""                      $$$$                        "$
  236.    o$$"                        $$$$                         "o
  237.    $$     oooo                 $$$$
  238.    $$   $$" ""$$               $$$$
  239.    $$  $$$$o  o$          $o   $$$$   o$
  240.    "$o  """  oo$          $$$$$$$$$$$$$$
  241.      "$$oooo$$"           $$$$$$$$$$$$$$
  242.         """"              $"   $$$$   "$
  243.                                $$$$
  244.                                $$$$
  245.                                $$$$
  246.                              oo$$$$oo
  247.                               $$$$$$
  248.                                $$$$
  249.                                "$$"
  250.                                 ""
  251.  
  252. If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanatarian eat?
  253. If CON and PRO are opposites, is Congress the opposite of Progress??
  254.  
  255. Two-Line Ascii-Art:
  256. -------------------
  257.  Oo   o=     .       ,S     (v)        o..o   |UU|UUU|UU|UUU|
  258. d_L  >v)  >(v<       4       =         (\/)S  |||||||||||||||
  259. dog, duck, fish, flamingo, light bulb, mouse, keyboard
  260.  
  261. Three-Line Ascii-Art:
  262. ---------------------
  263.  
  264. ):X  ]:o_    /     >: o    8:X   ((((     (:XC    |\__      |\___
  265. (_|   |O =  (: op   \\_/\  (_|  ( )(:[    | v|  (:> __)X  (:o ___(
  266.  )    |_o=   \      |  |\   6    ((((      \_|    |/        |/
  267. cat, cow,   dog,   horse, mouse, spider, walrus, penguin,  ghost,
  268.  
  269.   ____  _    /(_M_)\    /~(_)~\
  270. 66    \/ /  (  _ _  )  (  :=:  =====II
  271. =-_\/_/\_\   \( V )/    \_(~)_/
  272. fish,       bat signal,    violin
  273.  
  274. Four-Line Ascii-Art:
  275. --------------------
  276. ooooO Ooooo   _____      Y     \~~~\         _____        _____
  277. (   ) (   )  |==   |   (:'     /|~~/|     oo/><><>\   ^..^     \9
  278. )  (   )  (  |  o. |    ))    |~~~|?|    ( -)><><><>  (oo)_____/
  279. (__)   (__)  |__O__|   ((     |___|/       L|_|L|_|`     WW  WW
  280. feet,     5.25" disk, snake, anything box,  turtle,       pig
  281. Randy Ransom - (v) ran(dy+som)
  282.  
  283.                          _____
  284.                      _-~~     ~~-_//
  285.                    /~             ~\
  286.                   |              _  |_
  287.                  |         _--~~~ )~~ )___
  288.                 \|        /   ___   _-~   ~-_
  289.                 \          _-~   ~-_         \
  290.                 |         /         \         |
  291.                 |        |           |     (O  |
  292.                  |      |             |        |
  293.                  |      |   O)        |       |
  294.                  /|      |           |       /
  295.                  / \ _--_ \         /-_   _-~)
  296.                    /~    \ ~-_   _-~   ~~~__/
  297.                   |   |\  ~-_ ~~~ _-~~---~  \
  298.                   |   | |    ~--~~  / \      ~-_
  299.                    |   \ |                      ~-_
  300.                     \   ~-|                        ~~--__ _-~~-,
  301.                      ~-_   |                             /     |
  302.                         ~~--|                                 /
  303.                           |  |                               /
  304.                           |   |              _            _-~
  305.                           |  /~~--_   __---~~          _-~
  306.                           |  \                   __--~~
  307.                           |  |~~--__     ___---~~
  308.                           |  |      ~~~~~
  309.                           |  |
  310.  
  311.                     .                                    .::'
  312.                     `::.                               .`  :
  313.                      :  '.                           .`o    :
  314.                     :    o'.                        ~~}     :
  315.                     :     {~~                        `:     `:.
  316.                   .:`     :'                          :    .:   `.
  317.                .`   :.    :                           :   :       `.
  318.              .`       :   :                           `.   `.       :
  319.             :       .'   .'                            `.    `..    :
  320.             :    ..'    .'                               `:.. '.````:
  321.             :''''.' ..:'                                   ::`::`:   :.      .
  322.           .:   :'::'::        ..........................:"``````'"`:   `:""": :
  323.   .:"""""""""""`''''''""""""""                     ...........""""""`:   `:"`,'
  324.   :                            ..........""""""""""                   ':   `:
  325.   `............."""""""""""""""                                         `..:'
  326.     `:..'
  327.              .::::.
  328.            :::'  :::                ::                     ::
  329.           :::    ':'               ::    ''               ::
  330.          :::      ..::  :..:   .::.::   ::   ::.:.  ..::  ::   .:
  331.          :::     :: :: :: ::  ::  ::   ::   :: ::  :: :: ::   :'`:
  332.           :::.  .'::'::' ::..:'::'::..:'`:.':  ::..'::'::'`::'`:.::':
  333.             ::::..........
  334.  
  335. Isn't "Criminal Lawyer" redundant?
  336.  
  337.      _____________    _____________    _____________    _____________
  338.     | ___________ |  | ___________ |  | ___________ |  | ___________ |
  339.     ||  | \_/ |  ||  ||  | \_/ |  ||  ||  | \_/ |  ||  ||  | \_/ |  ||
  340.     ||  | o.o |  ||  ||  | o.o |  ||  ||  | o.o |  ||  ||  | o.o |  ||
  341.     || ==( _ )== ||  || ==( _ )== ||  || ==( _ )== ||  || ==( _ )== ||
  342.     ||--U-----U--||  ||--U-----U--||  ||--U-----U--||  ||--U-----U--||
  343.     ||___________||  ||___________||  ||___________||  ||___________||
  344.     |-------------|  |-------------|  |-------------|  |-------------|
  345.  
  346. What is a "free" gift ?  Aren't all gifts free?
  347.  
  348.