home
***
CD-ROM
|
disk
|
FTP
|
other
***
search
/
Esprit de Apple Corps
/
EDAC-2.iso
/
Graphics
/
ASCII.Art
/
Art1
/
COWS.txt
< prev
next >
Wrap
Text File
|
1988-12-07
|
22KB
|
545 lines
From: qy1 (Kevin Fink) [ Unix-N, March, 1988 ]
****************************************************************************
* THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO COWS -- AS YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THEM BEFORE! *
* *
* LAST UPDATE: FEB. 29, 1988 -- SEND ANY CONTRIBUTIONS ABOVE ADDRESS. *
****************************************************************************
(__) (__) (__) (__)
(oo) (oo) (oo) (oo)
/-------\/ /-------\/ /-------\/ /-------\/
/ | || / | || / | || / | ||
* ||----|| * ||W---|| * ||w---|| * ||V---||
>> >> >> >> >> >> >> >>
Cow Cow laden Same cow Betty Ford-type
with milk after milking cow with milk
(___) (___) * (___) (___)
(o o) (o o) \ (o o) (o o)
/-------\ / /-------\ / \-------\ / /-------\ /
/ | ||O / | ||O | ||O / | >#>-+|O
* ||,---|| * ||@\--|| ||,---|| * ||,----|
>> >> >> >> >> >> >> >
Bull Same bull after Rotc bull after Red-blooded American Bull
seeing above cow seeing other bull shooting the Rotc bull
(__) (__) (__) (__)
(oo) (oo) (oo) (oo)
/-------\/-* /-------\/ /-------\/ >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
/ | || \ )*)(\/* / * / | ||
* ||----|| * \ |||/)|/()( >>>>>>>>>>>>>>
\/|(/)(/\/(,,/ \)|(/\/|)(/\
Cow munching Grass munching Cow in water Cow in trouble
on grass on cow
(__) (__) * (__) * (__)
(oo) (oo) \ (oo) | (oo)
/--------\/ /-oooooo-\/ \-------\/ \-------\/
* o| || * ooooooooo o o| || / ||
||----|| ooooooooooooo ||----||>==/-----||
ooo>> >> ooooooooooooooooo >> >> >>
Cow taking Cow in deep Cow getting the shit
shit shit kicked out of her
(__)
(oo) U
/-------\/ /---V
/ | || * |--| .
* ||----||
>> >>
Cow at 1 meter. Cow at 100 meters. Cow at 10,000 meters.
(__) )__( vv vv
(oo) (oo) ||----|| *
/-------\/ *-------\/ || | /
/ | || / | || /\-------/
* ||----|| / ||----|| (oo)
>> >> vv vv (>>)
American Cow Polish Cow Australian Cow
(__) (__) (__)
(oo) ____ (oo) _---_(oo)
/-------\/ /- --\/ /- -\/
/ | || / | || /| ||
* ||----|| * ||___-|| * ||___-||
>> >> >> >> >> >>
Freshman Cow Freshman Cow Freshman Cow
Arriving at Rit After the "Freshman 15" After the "Freshman 20"
(__) (__) (__)
(OO) (@@) (xx)
/-------\/ /-------\/ /-------\/
/ | || / | || / | ||
* ||----|| * ||----|| * ||----||
>> >> >> >> >> >>
Cow who drank Jolt Cow who ate Cow who used Jolt to wash
psychadelic mushrooms down psychadelic mushrooms
________________________
(__) / \
(oo) ( Meet our great leader! )
/-------\/ --'\________________________/
/ | ||
* ||----||
>> >>
# #
## ##
## ##
## ##
## ##
### ###
M M OOOO OOOO ### ###### ###
MM MM O O O O ####### #######
M M M M O O O O # #
M M M O O O O # ### ### #
M M O O O O # # # # # #
M M OOOO OOOO # # ### # ### #
\\ # ### ### #
\\ # #
\\________ # ######## #
\-------- # # ## ## # #
# # # #
######### # # #### # #
###### ###### ####
########################### ###
## ##
## # #
# ## # #
# # # # # # #
# # # # # # #
# # # # # # # #
# # # # # # # #
# # # # # # # #
# # # # # # #### #
# # # ##### # # ### # #
# # # # # ##################### ######### # #
# # # # # # # # #
# # # # # # # # #
# # # # # # # # #
# # # # # # # # #
# # # # # # # #
##### ### #### ####
###### ### ###### ######
/\ __
/ \ ||
(__) (__) \ / (_||_)
SooS (oo) \/ (oo)
/------S\/S /-------\/ /S /-------\/
/ | || / | || / S / | ||
* ||----|| * ||----||___/ S * ||----||
>> >> >> >> >> >>
This cow belonged Ben Franklin owned Abe Lincoln's
to George Washington this cow cow
(__)
* (__) (oo)
\ (oo) /------\/
\-------\/ /| |/ |
| ==$ || / | [) ||
||----|| * ||----||
>> >> >> >>
Old "One Arm" belonged This cow was given to
to Ceasar's Palace Hugh Hefner for his Birthday
(___) (__) (__)
( O ) (oo) (oo)
/-------\ / \/--------\/
/ | ||V | |
* ||----|| ||------||
>> >> >> >>
The cyclops that Jason and This cow lived with
the Argonauts met had this cow Dr. Doolittle
(__) (__)
[##] (@o)
/-------\/ /-------\/ /------- (__)
/ | || / | || / | || (oo)
* ||----|| * ||----|| * ||----|---\/
>> >> >> >> >> >
This cow belonged This cow lived with This cow belonged to
to Flash Gordon the Little Rascals the Headless Horseman
The following three cows were supposed to be appearing with the
Celebrity Cows pictured above... However, I found out that they
were sitting around a bar getting drunk discussing what exactly
is art. The cows' conclusion: Art is a bunch of Bull(s).
Sorry, but I couldn't resist,
Hawk, Sesquipedalianite
and Head of Heffer Control.
(____) (____) (____)
(oo ) (o o) ( O O)
/-----------\ / /-----\ /---- /-----------\ /
/ || | \/ / | | \/ | / || | \/
/ || |||| \ | | | | | / || ||||
* ||||-----|||| *| | |-----| | | * ||||-----||||
/\/\ /\/\ /\ /\ /\ /\ >>>> >>>>
This cow belonged This was Salvatore No one was sure whether
to Pablo Picasso Dali's favorite cow M.C. Escher's cow had four
legs or eight
Seeing as how it is Spring Break Season, I thought I would share
with you some Vacation Ideas for any of you Cows out there on the
Net who don't know where to go for some fun.
- Steve "Hawk" Schultz
Head of Heifer Control
Well, first of all, there are theme parks and historic sites:
O__O \_|_/
(oo) (oo)
/-------\/ /-------\/
/ | || / | ||
* ||----|| * ||----||
>> >> >> >>
Cow at Disneyland Cow visiting the Statue of Liberty
There's the fun and warmth of the southwest:
(__)
>> (oo)
>>>> /-------\/
>>>>> / | ||
>>>>> * ||----||
>>>>>>>> ====>>====>>====
>>>>>>>>>>>>>/
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Cow Hanging Ten at Malibu
And on the other coast, while the water might be a little chilly up
north, it is still exciting:
)\ (__)
/ \ (oo)
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Cow swimming at Amityville
(Where Jaws was filmed, for those less educated)
For those who believe in Winter Wonderland's, the Rockies present
excitement galore:
*
\
\
|\
\ | \ (__)
\\|| \(oo)
\||\ \\/
>> \||
\\ ||
\\||
\||
>>
\\_
\_
Cow skiing a Black Diamond at Aspen
And of course, the traditional Spring Break spot, where you can go for
expensive beer and cheap sex:
(__)
(--)
/-\/-\
/| |\
> | | >
(__) | |
(DD) /----\
/-------\/ / \ \
/ | ||_\_/ > * >
* ||----| Cow sunning at Fort Lauderdale
>> > (What a bod, huh guys?)
Cow chugging brews and staring at
sunbathers at Fort Lauderdale
Or, for those who have trouble picking up members of the opposite sex:
O O O O
\ \ / /
\ \ (__) /
(__) \ \ (xx)/
(DD) \ +--------+\//
/-------\/ \| | /
/ | || +--------+
* ||----||
>> >>
Cow fantasizing about "Riding the Mechanical Bull"
at Gillies in Texas
Disclaimer: If these have offended anyone, I apologize, not whole-heartedly,
but I do apologize. I mean, what do you expect from a bunch
of cows???
\ (__)
\\(oo)
/-----\\\/
/ | (##)
* ||----||"
>> >>
This cow plays bagpipes.
>From: eric@snark.UUCP (Eric S. Raymond)
(__) (__) (__)
(\/) ($$) (**)
/-------\/ /-------\/ /-------\/
/ | 666 || / |=====|| / | ||
* ||----|| * ||----|| * ||----||
>> >> >> >> >> >>
Satanic cow This cow is a Yuppie Cow in love
>From: thomas@leah.Albany.Edu (Thomas Barry)
(__) (__)
(oo) (oo)
/-'''''-\/ /-------------------\/
/ |'''''|| / | ||
* ||''''|| * ||----------------||
>> >> >> >>
Stretch Cow
Cow in Argyle *
** **
* ** * * * **
* / / \ * *
\ \ / \ / /
* / / \ \ (__) \ \
/ (00) / /
\ /-------\/ \ \
/ / | || / /
\ \ * ||----|| \ \
/ / >> >> / /
Cow in Heat
(__)
/--------(00)
/ | |( )
* ||---- ||()
|| ||
>> >>
Cow Chewing Marbles
>From: Anonymous (name withheld upon request)
(___)
(o o)
/------\ / (__)
/ ____O (oo)
| / /----\----\/ "Where did that camera come from!"
/\oo===| / ||
| || *||>-----||
* >> >> >>
Thanks very much for distributing your cow canon.
I got a copy via a friend who has access to netnews, which I do not.
I ran off a copy to send to some friends who recently moved away,
to a suburb of Detroit, and are not on the net at all.
I thought they should have some cows appropriate to their locale.
Herewith are my apocryphal cows:
(__) \__\ (__)
(oo) o (oo) (oo)
/-------\/ ____\___\/ *+-------\/
/ | || / | || ||______||
* ||----|| * ||----|| ||----||
OO OO OO OO OO OO
Detroit cow Mustang cow pickup cow
(__) (__) \_||_>
(oo) (oo) (*||*)
/---------------\/ /----\/ /-------\||/
/ | || / || / | ||
* ||------------|| *-||----|| * ||----||
OO OO OO OO OO }{
li-moo-cow fastback cow teenager's cow
>From: Mario Barbacci <barbacci@sei.cmu.edu>:
(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* OO----OO
low rider cow
The following has nothing to do with Detroit,
but surely belongs among the canonical cows:
____
(____)
(__)
(oo)
/-------\/
/ | ||
* ||----||
>> >>
holy cow
---------------------- Our exclusive BULL section -----------------------
(___) (___)
(o o) (o o)
/-------\ / /-------\ /
/ | ||O / | O> ||O
* ||,---|| * ||,---||
>> >> >> >>
Bull A-bomb-in-a-bull No-bull
(---)
( )
/-----\ (___)
| | (o o)
| | | (-----) \ /
| | | / / \ O
| * | * | O |
>> >> -----
Coward Phone Bull
------------------------- BIG COWS FOR BIG FOLKS ------------------------
______________________
}__{ / From THE Stranger \
(00) ( 315258@uottawa......eh. )
:****** \/ ==='\________________________/'
: # ##
##****##
"" "" *
* *
. ## .... ##. .
. .. ## ... ... ## ..
.' ## ## '.
. ## ## .
' . ### ### . '
'. . .### .. #### .. ### .'
" . .. . . . . . . .. .. '
/ +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ / \
/ ` { '@' '@' }
/ { @@@ @@@ }
' H O L Y C O W { \ }
+ ! { \ }
++: : : \ \ /
++: : : { () () }
++ : : : \____________/
++ : : : ! VW JIMMY WV !
+ : : : \------------/
: :<<+++++++++++++++++++ : :/ ---\: :
: : : : : : :
: : : : : : :
: : ------ : : \ :
:________: : ________m__ : :_____m____:
*
* *
** **
** **
** **
*** ***
**** ****
.*** .. **** .. ***
/ / \\
/ ############################+ {=====} {=====} \
/ # ` { : $$$ :=: $$$ : }
/ # { \___/ \___/ }
## H U M A N C O W { / \ }
* ! { / \ }
**: : : \ : : /
**: : : { () VV () }
** : : : \____________/
** : : : === 666 ===
* : : : P
: :<<################### : :/ ---\: :
: : : : : : :
: : : : : : :
: : ------ : : \ :
:________: : ________m__ : :_____m____:
.
. ..
. . . .. . .
.. . . . . . .
. . . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . .
. . . . . .
. . . . . .
. . .*. .*.
. . Beauty Cow . .
. . . .
. . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . .
. . .. . . .. . . . .
. .... .....
--
