This page is dedicated to bringing you the latest in movie news hosted by the best character on SCTV (in this fan's opinion), played by the excellent Joe Flaherty.
AAAaaawwoooo! I bid you....welcome to issue #12 of Count Floyd's Movie News. Well, April 15th has come and gone. Talk about your blood suckers. Ooh, it was a scary scary 1040 long form.
I was hoping to review "Dark City" in this issue but that movie left the theaters faster than "Mr. Magoo". Too bad because Cesspool and Egghead gave it 2 claws up. I did see Lost In Space, however. The TV show was based in 1997 while the film was based in 2058 on an Earth that is about to deplete it's resources. The film opens with a "Star Wars"-like shootout and is followed by a news conference. In the first 5 minutes or so we get to see some familiar faces from the TV series like June Lockhart, Marta Kristen, Angela Cartwright and Mark Goddard. So far so good. We then get into the intrigues of the plot line like Dr. Smith, played by Gary Oldman, trying to sabotage the Jupiter 2. The story follows the series fairly closely but it is done with a lot less camp. The special effects are very good but I found the pacing to be off. There was too little action and too much character study.
A definite downer for me was William Hurt who plays the father of the Robinson family. It seemed to me that he was sleepwalking his way through the part. Guy Williams played the father in the series and he had Testosterone overdrive. William Hurt, at least in this part, couldn't lead a troop of Girl Scouts in a cookie drive. A surprise performance was supplied by Matt LeBlanc of "Friends" fame and came off very well as Major Don West. Gary Oldman didn't play Dr. Smith in an over-the-top manner but maintain some of his "bitchiness". I don't think I've ever seen a bad performance from him.
When I was 12 years old I had a crush on Penny played by Angela Cartwright. In the film the character Penny was played by Lacey Chabert, who will be the heart-throb of many of this generation's 12 year olds as well. Dick Tuffeld supplied the voice of the robot in the TV series as well as the film and it was cool hearing him again. The film was directed by Stephen Hopkins who has directed "A Nightmare On Elm Street 5" and "Predator 2". The film definitely left you with the feeling that a sequel will follow but I'm afraid that they won't recoup their investment in the film and this space family Robinson will be "Lost In Space" for a long long time.
"Warning warning, the movie news is approaching. Warning, wwwwaaarrrnnniiinng....sproink" Toast is ready.
In this issue I would like to recommend Air Force One starring Harrison Ford and Glenn Close. Ford plays President Marshall, who has just finished a speech in Moscow after the capture of a major world terrorist with the help and cooperation of the Russian government. In this speech he vows "never to give in to terrorists". After his triumphant speech he is whisked off to the Presidential plane Air Force One where his wife and daughter are waiting for takeoff back to the good ol' U. S. of A. In a hands across the world gesture a Russian news crew is allowed to come aboard and fly back with the First Family. Hey, some of these reporters look a little rough. Could it be? Okay, it is. The terrorists are lead by Ivan Korshunov, played by Gary Oldman, whose mission is to hold the plane hostage for the release of the said terrorist captured at the beginning of the picture. Gunfire erupts onboard and the Secret Service go into action but are caught with their pants down (and no Monica in sight). Anywho, The Prez escapes in his little escape pod, or did he? I failed to mention that this President was a Vietnam war hero. Back in Washington Vice President Bennett, played by Glenn Close, is being advised by all manner of the armed forces in a war room type setting. She is at odds with Defense Secretary Dean, played by Dean Stockwell, who wants her to take over the government because the President is technically incapacitated. This film follows all the cliches of the lone hero on a boat, train, plane or other mode of transportation but it is done with a bit of flash and glitter. The high priced help probably saved this film from being just so-so. I thought it was pretty entertaining and recommend it for those who like action films.
Next month I am expecting a scary scary article written by one of the readers to fill this spot. Perhaps you would like to review a video or write an article pertaining to videos? Before you do you need to contact me for instructions. Every other issue may feature an article by one of Count Floyd's Groovy Ghoulies. Reach me here.
First a bit of old business. In the last issue I failed to supply the answer to this trivia question: "Who was the narrator of the original film "Texas Chainsaw Massacre?". The correct answer was John Larroquette of TV's "Night Court" fame.
Congratulations go to the new Triviameister of Mellonville, Bil B., for being the first person to answer this trivia question: "What legendary creator of classic cinema creatures ended his career applying pancake makeup and false eyelashes to Mr. Ed?". The correct answer is Jack Pierce, who was the creator of the original makeup used by Boris Karloff in "Frankenstein". Way to go Bil. A tip o' the cape goes to the following people for answering the trivia question correctly also: Carlos V., Brad & Janice, Charles D., Steve J. and Justin S.
The new Triviameister of Mellonville asks: In what 1981 remake of a 1957 SCI-FI classic did we hear the song "Galaxy Glue?". Ooh, a scary scary stumper. The first person to answer this trivia question correctly will become the next Triviameister. To answer the trivia question please click here. Good luck to all.
Last issue's survey question was "What is your favorite movie snack?". The survey SAYS:
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It looks like Junior Mints are an odds-on favorite. I hear they are good if you are having an operation. Just pop one into your incision for some of it's minty fresh healing properties.
Let's take some time to get a little mushy. This issue's survey question is: "What is your favorite lovey-dovey or mushy scene in a movie?". For me it would have to be the final scene in "Casablanca" between Bogart and Bergman at the airport. I call it "the hill of beans" speech. I felt it was a classy way to end a relationship. So what is your favorite lovey-dovey or mushy movie scene? To answer the survey question please click here. Here's looking at you, kid.
AAAaaawwoooo! Count Floyd will return in issue #13 titled "Leafraker or How I Became 007's Gardener" due out on 5-31-98 or so.
