THE FOLLOWING WAS TAKEN AS A LETTER READ ON
	THE AIR OF "THE RUSH LIMBAUGH SHOW" AND POSES
	AN INTERESTING TWIST ON GUN CONTROL ARGUMENTS.

	PEN CONTROL U.S.A.

    I would like to invite you and all your friends to 
  become members of "Pen Control U.S.A."

     Our goal is to propose legislation which would be 
  designed to forever keep the implements of script, print and
  type out of the hands of liberal lawmakers and journalist,
  for as you know we are becoming inundated with bad law and 
  editorials in our country; and, we feel the time is right
  to put an end to it.

    Now there are two classes of weapons targeted by our 
  movement.  Concealable and automatics.  The concealable are
  comprised of pens, pencils and crayons; the latter of which
  is largely responsible for this dissemination and 
  articulation of most liberal thought.  These would be
  permitted to the general public, provided anyone wishing to
  obtain one can certify that he or she has successfully 
  passed an intensive six week "writers safety course."  The
  automatics include typewriters, word processors, presses and 
  computer printing devices.  These items would be immediately
  confiscated by police and dumped into the prince William
  Sound.  On neither class of writing tool would a grandfather
  clause apply.

    We do realize that Constitutional concerns relating to 
  the first amendment arise; but, Supreme Court president does
  exist that allows modification of this amendment for the
  purpose of public safety.  For example it is not permitted
  for a person to yell "fire" in a movie theater, not that
  anyone would hear it anyway.  Besides if the original intent 
  rule were followed, only "quill-pens" and "manual printing
  presses" would be protected by the first amendment.  
  Interested persons may obtain more facts about our movement
  by using their imaginations.

    THIS IS A PRIME EXAMPLE WHICH ILLUSTRATES THE ABSURDITY OF MOST
    LIBERAL ARGUMENTS.