ParentTime Live! Transcript Hepatitus B Vaccine Switching to Formula Fussy Baby Lying Night Feeding Crying Baby Bedwetting Ritalin Biaxin Handling Anger Self-Potty Training Quiet Alertness Yeast Infections		ParentTime Live! Event Transcript In this April 4 chat event, Dr. Bill and Martha Sears share their views on a variety of baby and child care topics. ParentTime Moderator: Welcome to ParentTime Live! Our guests today are Dr. Bill and Martha Sears, parents of eight and authors of The Baby Book and The Discipline Book. Bill and Martha are here to answer your parenting questions. Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Hi parents! It’s good to be with you tonight. We will field any questions you have about your infant or child. We love to chat about children. Hepatitus B Vaccine Question: How common is it for newborns to receive Hepatitus B vaccinations? Our newborn received the first of three shots shortly after birth. Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: It is very common for newborns to receive the Hepatitus B vaccine. However, medically speaking, it is usually unnecessary. Hepatitus B is a sexually-transmitted disease, so in most cases it makes better sense to give the vaccine to teenagers rather than newborns. The only reason it is given to newborns is because that is when the infant is a captive audience, and you don’t want to miss giving the vaccine. A reliable parent can wait and get their child the vaccine as a teenager. Remember, vaccine laws are made for the worst case scenario — assuming that all parents are negligent and therefore let’s give the vaccine in the hospital while we have the baby in our hands. This vaccine mentality exposes newborns to the Hepatitus vaccine at least 13 years before they really need it.
		Switching to Formula Question: I recently stopped nursing my three-and-a-half month-old daughter and am now giving her formula. Is it true that when feeding formula to a baby it’s also important to give them water? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Yes, this is true. Formula is more concentrated than breastmilk, so the immature kidneys of an infant need extra water to process the more concentrated formula. An extra 4-8 ounces of water per day is sufficient.
		Fussy Baby Question: I have a very fussy baby. What causes this? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Babies fuss because of their temperament, not because of your parenting abilities. They may fuss because they hurt, because they’re hungry, because they’re anxious, bored or just plain old want to be picked up and held. Here are some time-honored fuss-busters: Wear your baby in a baby sling at least three hours a day. Studies show that carried babies cry 40% less than non-carried babies. Be sure the baby is not allergic to the formula or to a food in your diet (such as cows milk) if breastfeeding. Play the game of “magic mirror.” This is a Sears family trick that calmed many of our fussy babies. Hold the baby in front of a mirror to witness her own performance. If the image itself does not turn off the tizzy, as an added touch place her bare feet against the surface of the mirror. Try moving attractions. Place baby in front of a bubbling fish tank or the swinging pendulum of a clock. Or have one parent hold baby while the other parent exercises on the treadmill or the cross-country ski machine. Also try trees blowing in the breeze — Take a walk! Nature’s mobiles, such as moving cars, trees, birds, kids running around the park will often calm a fussy baby. Here’s a trick which Dr. Bill discovered one night when Martha was out and our baby threw a fit. I call this the neck nestle. Hold baby skin-to-skin against your chest (the warm fuzzy position) and nestle the baby’s head into the crook of your neck so that your jawbones drape over the baby’s head. Sing “Old Man River” — the vibrating male voice will lull baby right to sleep. (This is one of the few fuss-busters in which Dads have an edge over Moms.)
		Lying Question: My seven-year-old daughter has begun lying about silly things. For example, she told her aunt that she changed her sister’s diapers for a year. Is there any way to handle this without crushing my child’s spirit? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: To a child, these are usually not lies. They are fantasies. However, by age seven, children should be taught the value of telling the truth. For some children, the truth hurts, so that fear of punishment keeps them from telling the truth. We made a deal with our children that we would never get angry at them, no matter what they did, as long as they told the truth. Model truth for your child. Create a truthful home. For example, if a nuisance caller is on the phone don’t tell your child, “Tell them I’m not here.” This is a white lie, but children don’t perceive it that way. Avoid setups for lying. If you know your child broke the cookie jar by seeing the telltale crumbs on her hands, don’t ask her if she did it. Of course she did it! Confront her. Expect the truth. Children should not feel they have choices in this matter. Adults tend to get into situational ethics, meaning we tell the truth when it’s convenient but use little fibs when it’s not. Avoid sending these kinds of mixed messages to your child.
		Night Feeding Question: My seven-month-old used to sleep through the night, but now she wakes up in the night wanting to eat. Will this extra feeding cause obesity? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: No, it will not cause obesity. Most seven-month-olds need at least one night feeding. Also, seven months is a prime time for night waking, because of teething, separation anxiety and the desire to practice the newly-discovered skills of sitting up and crawling — and therefore banging into crib rails. Try to give your infant the message that nighttime is for sleeping, not for playing or eating. Also, when mother returns to work it’s common for infants at this age to begin waking up in order to make up for the missed touch time during the day. Experiment with various sleeping arrangements that get the whole family the most sleep. This includes the option of nestling next to your baby in your bed.
		Crying Baby Question: Help! My baby cries a lot, and often the crying doesn’t stop, even when I pick her up. What can I do? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Don’t take your baby’s cries personally. It’s not your fault your baby cries, nor is it always your responsibility to stop the crying. Sometimes, the best your can do is to hold your baby lovingly and identify and prevent situations that trigger crying. The rest is up to the baby. Above all, resist the “let-her-cry-it-out” advice, which is easy for somebody else to give to a mother. A mother is biologically programmed to respond to her baby’s cries. When a baby cries, the blood flow to a mother’s breasts and her heart rate increase, and she has a biological urge to listen and respond to her baby. So anyone who advises letting a baby cry it out doesn’t understand a mother’s biology. Giving a nurturant response to your baby’s cry is biologically correct.
		Bedwetting Question: My eight-year-old son is fully toilet trained during the day but is having problems at night. I have tried cutting back on his drinks after 7 PM, and I make him use the bathroom just before bedtime. I’ve also tried waking him up during the night. Nothing seems to work. Is there something wrong with his hormones? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Here’s a method that Dr. Bill has used over the past ten years in pediatric practice with hundreds of children over six years of age to encourage nighttime dryness: Purchase a bladder conditioning device, consisting of a pad and buzzer (available through children’s products catalogs or through your doctor). The pad fits in your child’s underwear and connects to a tiny alarm pinned on his pajama top. The first drop of urine will set off the alarm. This conditions your child to “beat the beeper.” Each night before you go to bed, do a drill in which you tell him to get up and go to the bathroom as soon as he hears the beeper. Be sure to apply cool water to his face to wake him completely before he goes to the bathroom. For best results, have your doctor go through this drill with your son in the doctor’s office. This technique is effective in at least 90% of eight-year-olds. It’s the same technique that you see advertised on television, but at a cost of around $1,000. You can do it yourself for less than $100.
		Ritalin Question: I’ve been advised to put my hyperactive son on Ritalin. I’ve heard some bad things about this drug. What do you think? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: I have used Ritalin in my practice for over 25 years. It is a safe and effective drug — but only in selected children and when all other alternatives have first been tried. Ritalin should never be used as the only treatment for ADD. Here are some techniques to try before using Ritalin: Address potentially upsetting situations at home. Be alert for a possible mismatch between child and school. Often, when a teacher’s style of teaching does not fit the child’s individual style of learning, a young student is unfairly labeled as ADD or learning disabled. De-junk your child’s diet. Start your child off with a healthy breakfast of protein and complex carbohydrates (such as granola and yogurt, or eggs and toast). Encourage a healthy mid-morning snack of fruit or complex carbohydrates. Put him on a “pure” diet for a week, getting rid of junk sugars, food coloring and additives, and caffeine-containing beverages. Try neurofeedback, one of the newest alternatives to Ritalin. This process uses computer technology to teach the child how to concentrate. It’s basically like using a video game to teach children how to sit still and pay attention. See if there is a neurofeedback training center in your community. Consult a specialist in behavior and learning strategies. If these techniques produce no results, try a short-term trial of Ritalin. Sometimes, a few weeks of Ritalin gets a hyperactive child over the hump and allows all these other strategies work better. Once they do, you can gradually wean your child off the Ritalin.
		Biaxin Question: What is Biaxin used to treat, and what are the side effects? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Biaxin is a new form of erythromycin antibiotic. It is more expensive but works better than the older form of erythromycin. An even newer and better form is Zithromax, which only needs to be given once a day for five days. Unfortunately, some health insurance does not cover these new antibiotics unless your doctor demands them. The newer once-a-day antibiotics are a boon for busy parents and reluctant children (nobody can remember to give a child medicine three or four times a day).
		Handling Anger Question: My three-year-old hits and spits and becomes totally unreasonable when she’s angry. How should I handle this? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: First of all, teach her that it’s okay to have feelings. You want to raise an expressive child. But give her alternatives and more socially-acceptable ways of expressing her feelings. Show and tell her: “When you’re angry, squeeze your hand, or make a fist, or hug your teddy bear.” One of our children used to scream when angry, so we told her she could only scream on the grass outside. She needed to learn that screaming in the house was unacceptable. But she could go outside and scream to vent her frustration, and it would not bother anyone. Remember, your child watches how you display your anger. Model acceptable ways of venting anger. It’s okay to show anger, but in a way that it does not harm others. Hitting and spitting are totally unacceptable, and you need to convey to her what behavior you will and will not accept.
		Self-Potty Training Question: My little girl is trying to potty train herself at 21 months. She refuses to wear a diaper, but doesn’t give more than a few seconds notice that she needs to go. So, there are lots of accidents! Suggestions? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Capitalize on your daughter’s awareness of her body. Your role in toilet training is that of a facilitator — meaning you make it easier for her to follow up on her body’s signals. Go to the toy store together and let her pick out her own potty chair. Toddlers are more likely to use they potty they choose. Place the potty near where she is playing, so that when she feels the urge to go her target is only a few feet away.
		Quiet Alertness Question: At six weeks to two months of age, how often should my baby be sleeping vs. nursing and spending time in active/quiet alertness? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Quiet alertness is the state in which an infant learns. So the more time during the day your baby is in this state, the better his brain will develop. “Baby-wearing” (wearing your baby in a sling) increases the state of quiet alertness. Most two-month-olds will average from 12 to 14 hours of sleep, but this varies greatly from baby to baby. Don’t expect longer than a five-hour stretch of sleeping for a two-month-old. Remember, nap time is also good for parents. Take at least one nap a day with your baby.
		Yeast Infections Question: My son (16 months) gets yeast infections when taking an antibiotic. He refuses to eat yogurt — even frozen yogurt. What other foods besides yogurt can offset yeast infections? Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Get some acidopholus capsules to sprinkle on his cereal. Ask your doctor for a prescription of Mycostatin and give your child one dropperful a couple of times a day while he’s on antibiotics. Use over-the-counter anti-fungal cream as a barrier cream for diaper rash for a week during the antibiotic treatment. Moderator: Thanks for participating in our chat with Dr. Bill and Martha Sears. Dr. Bill & Martha Sears: Good night, parents! We enjoyed chatting with you. Give your children a hug for us.