I think girls deserve the rings when they get married because they are the ones that suffer when is time to have kids

No, I don't really want an engagement ring. However, I would like a wedding ring. I think that diamonds are boring. Perhaps because everyone wears them. I would just like have a band-- preferably white gold. That's it.And I would buy him one in return for mine. Tha's what it's all about-- sharing.

My boyfriend (now fiancee) bought me a ring in April.
I insisted that he pick it out instead of me. I
really like the ring because it symbolizes our love
and appreciate it, but now wish that I had
picked it out instead...

I think that he should by me a ring.

no i don't. don't ask me why i just don;t find most diamond rings very attractive and
for me to get a diamond ring i would nreed to have it custom made!

The whole engagement ring thing is the product of a materialist society, but what the heck I live in this society!!! My boyfriend and I went to the jewelry store together and picked out our rings, I got a gorgeous 1 karat custom diamond ring with a thick gold band and his ring has got a few nice sized diamonds, too. I can't think of any good reason to explain why we spent so much money, but I can tell you I love my ring and every minute of everyday I can just look down and see that diamond and know that my man loves me, and as soon as we pay off the rings we can start saving for a wedding (hee! hee!)

Yes I would want an engagement ring and no I wouldn't
buy him one. I do expect him to buy me one becuase I'm
marrying the turd monkey

hmm the ring thing...I think that I would want a ring..not a diamond or even anything expensive or fancy, just something plain to remind me that somebody loves me and wants to be with me...

I dont know if I would buy a ring for my guy..I would probably buy something to show I cared but not nessicerily a ring..

I want a diomond ring, but with a sapphire. there is a guy i want a ring from, but he hasnt proposed yet. he's a real sweetie, but l dont think he feels the way i do and we probobly wont get married. thats all for now, bye!

I know that this is really old fashioned, but I think that a guy should buy his grrrl a ring. It's so romantic and a ring symbolizes a bond. But the chick should also do the same.

i know of a woman who was furious when an intermediary told her fiance she didn't think his intended bride cared about an engagement ring. the poor friend caught in the middle ended up being a dupe - and getting the information through to the poor sucker that a ring was wanted and it had better be big.

there's a lovely start to a long and happy marriage...

my engagement lasted about 6 weeks - no time for a ring. besides, i made it very clear that i didn't want one. i'd feel differently if there was a ring in the family to be passed on, but to go out and pony up the dough for a ring - well, i've always said i'd rather have a washer/dryer...

well if i ever do decide to spend my life with sumone i suppose it'll prolly be a gal in that case i would like us to buy each other pride rings..for the wedding i would luv a whitegold ring with star or heart shaped stones in it..possibly in emrald my fav jewel

I think "no" to the engagement ring. An engagement is a short period of time...why a ring? But, a wedding ring is another story. You can look down at your hand and always think of whoever it is who's important to you. I wear a ring now (single and un-engaged) to remind myself to always be true to myself. It's like I'm sort of engaged to myself, but not really. And, it's on the other hand, so it'll never be replaced by a wedding ring.

Yes, I want a ring!! Not gold though, i hate gold.
Platinum or white gold. With a oval opal (my birthstone)
and two tiny diamond chips on the opposite adjacent sides.
With "ieme la belle" (old english for "love the beautiful")
engraved in side. Because i'm beautiful inside and out. i
wouldn't buy my boyfriend one, just because & i'm not sure
if i'll end up w/ a guy. But, I would expect him to buy it
for me! i'm worth it.

no. i wouldn't buy my boyfriend any kind of large jewel. i myself don't really wear rings, and if i was got one, i would coo and do all the stupid stuff, but then i'd probably turn into a gopher and hide it under the floor boards. i would really paranoid about losing it so i wouldn't wear it unless it was a special night or he asked me to. i would like a diamond necklace, but it's a waste of money. i wouldn't care what my boyfriend got me for an engagement ring, unless it was a cheap, 7-eleven type ring. as long as he bought it because he wanted to make me happy, then it wouldn't really matter. some women are soo stupid. they are incredibly petty over stuff like that. they hold it against their mate forever and whenver they fight, they have to bring it up. not me.

Heck ya, of course I do! Although I do feel that men should wear some type of ring themselves to celebrate the engagement as well - AND he'd better give me a fake one or something when he proposes (if it is a suprise) because I loved the romantic suprise factor, but don't want to wear a ring for the rest of my life that I don't just love!!!!!

Bigger diamond-smaller penis! Ha-ha-ha-ha-a-a-a!!!

first off, mustardgirl, there is such a thing as a silver ring - PLATINUM! very cool
Anyway, I say screw the "ownership" argument; I love jewelry, and it's certainly one way to my heart. I do dislike the whole "status" crap of how big the diamond has to be and how much $ should get dropped being proportionate to a person's love for you..... I would be very satisfied with a ring that was picked out for me because my guy knows what I like (sapphires), and showed some creativity without necessarily dropping several thousand dollars - I like the symbolism, and I would certainly want to return the gesture - whether with a ring, a watch, or some other equally symbolic item. Yeah, it's materialistic to an extent, but I'm not going to deny I delight in baubles every once in a while!

I agree with the folks who say the diamond industry is corrupt. It's all marketing, excellent marketing, on their part. DeBeers has cornered the world's diamond market, and it's a capitalistic disgrace. Having said that, it's still nice to give some sort of token, I think, of your love.

I wouldn't really want an engagement ring. I think that if we're close enough to want to spend the rest of our lives together, I think I wouldn't need a ring to signify when one of us figured that out. Wedding rings are different completely; they signify that both are saying 'I want to spend the rest of my life with you.' I don't think I'd buy my boyfriend one, for the same reason. But, hey, I've never been in the situation. Sometimes opinions change when things *actually* happen to people.

No, I don't think I'd ever buy my boyfriend an engagement ring. I mean, this guy should love me enough to know that I have marriage on my mind. And my guy would be brave enough to ask me to marry him. Even though I am an independant woman, I must confess when it comes to relationships I am a traditional person. Wether you ask him, or he asks you, if it is meant to be it will all work out in the end.

the traditional wedding ring is not in my future. i guess it
depends on what my girlfriend thinks!
actually something unpretentious like a plane silver band
is all i would ever need.

I want to have a ring made for my love, but I'm afraid he'd take the
male "engagement ring" the wrong way. After all, I'm an educated, independent
woman of the 90's. Have any women given the men in their life an "engagement"ring
just because they love them and want to show them a token of their love and promise before
marriage?

My parents are in their 80's. Dad gave me the gold watch that my grandfather gave grandma when they got married in the late 1800's. Apparently, they didn't give rings back then in rural south georgia (scottish ancestry).

I like the idea of giving something of lasting value at special events like weddings. It becomes an heirloom.

Two months salaries nicely invested in an IRA show you, that he wants a future with you!

a diamond is forever. that's exactly why i think diamond rings are a big lie. i'd rather he make me a painting or some other personal creation, if he had to give me anything at all, instead of an ugly rock promising something no one should ever promise. call me cynical, the symbolism makes me sick.
and yeah, like someone else here said already, it's a big give in to consumerism. i don't want to taint my relationship by paying a bunch of money for a rock i've been TOLD i should want, especially considering the screwed up politics of diamond mining.
yuck

I would wan tsome kind of ring, not neccessiarly a diamond one, but one that showed he put somethought into chosing it and that he cares.

i specifically told my then-fiance that i didn't want an engagement or a wedding ring of the traditional sort. i figured maybe we'd just get something simple in our neighborhood or something. we frankly didn't have the money and i didn't see the point in him spending so much on something so traditional - seeing as nothing else in our relationship had gone in a traditional way.
he surprised me, however, on new years with the most beautiful ring i've every seen. yes, it had diamonds. and yes, i accepted it. although i hadn't thought i wanted it, it meant the world to me, because he chose it. i made him swear he wouldn't do the same with my wedding ring, but he ended up going to Tiffany's and picking an equally beautiful band.
so although i didn't really want them, i wear them with pride - not as a sign of ownership on his behalf, but because when i look at them, i am reminded of him, and how much he means to me, and how much i love him.
i never thought i'd be that sappy in my life, but i guess that's the way it goes when you love someone.

I'd be happy just to be given some flowers. Nine months and the poor boy's been given flowers eight times. I feel so unwanted. :<

I want a ring, but not a diamond ring. I want a tanzinite ring with a gold band. It's my fav stone. I don't want to be traditional.

Gag me raw. The engagement ring is a tradition perpetuated by
the diamond industry. What a monument to consumerism.

Please.

i don't like gold. i like silver....is there such thing as a silver engagement ring? i want a silver band with a small diamond, and two smaller purple jewels (amethysts?) on each side....ohhhh, that would be gorgeous!

hellllll, yea, i want a ring! i guess i would buy it for him if i loved him enough. don't listen to me, though. i'm only 14, so i wouldn't know.

Pinky: What is your problem? Just because you're gay, we aren't bashing you...don't do it to us cos we're straight!

It isn't a neccessity. I fell that if a man loves you enough to ask you to be his bride then why should you need a ring. A ring would be nice though. I think that the most romantic way for my boyfriend to propose would be to give me a ring from one of those cracker jack boxes and then tell me why he is proposing. Then I would gladly through myself in his arms and say YES YES YES!!!!

The "two months' salary" thing is such a crock. To answer Melissa's question, I'm pretty sure that it's marketing hype that the diamond industry made up. They'd ask for a year's salary if they thought they could get people to shell it out.

My opinion on wearing a ring is: A good relationship (gay or straight) is difficult to find and takes work to maintain, and if you've got one, you should be really proud, so why not advertise that it's going well?

At first my husband said he probably wouldn't want to wear a ring, but he changed his mind later. I was pretty relieved at that, though I'm not quite sure why...

Well when its time I will have an engagment
ring not nessacerly a diamond but not
something fake. And yes he will be buying it!
Of course if my guy ain't too macho and he
would be willing to wear a ring to show hes
mine and his loyality I'll get him one!!

I have been living together with my partner for 14 years. I wear a cock ring in honor of my devotion to my mistress.

What's the particular signifcance of diamonds anyway?
My favorite stones are aquamarines, jade, and opals. I
love blues and greens, and diamonds seem so plain and
lacking to me. Besides being valuable stones, I thought
diamonds might be symblic because their 'clearness'
might have connotations of innocence, purity, clean slate/
new beginnings etc. I'm sure this can't be the reason
though.

I am now living with my fiance, but we have not purchased an egagement ring yet. We'll be able to afford one by the end of August. We're pooling our resources together for this purchase and have agreed to buy his wedding band so that he can wear it at the same time. I don't think it's a symbol of ownership, but rather a reminder of a promise of commitment. I am looking forward to this time of my k=life and am proud to have a little bit of female-ness in me, so that I can brag and show of my sparkling wonder to ither women while they ooh and ahh on the outside and are a little bit envious on the inside.

lay off of your straight ass fantasy.
when was the last time HE gave you an
ORGASM?

When and if I ever get married, I would absolutely want an engagement ring. That is probably because I am extremely traditional and I often feel that I would be more contented in the 19th century. Anyway, I would want my boyfriend to buy me one, but I would want to pick it out or the best case scenario would be if I could design it myself. I am also very partial to the rings on QVC. I would love to have about ten of those, so that I could constantly change the look. But truly the ring is not a problem, finding a man as good as the ring definitely is.

My fiancee hasn't got enough money to buy me a big ugly diamond engagement ring, and I wouldn't want him to even if he did. I hate diamond rings -- so trite.

Whether or not you wear a ring does not define whether or not you are an independent 90s kinda woman. I watched a friend of mine go on and on about how it was a "dowry" and nobody was going to pay for her, blah, blah, blah. But when she was surprised with one, she ever became the queen of unnecessary hand guestures. It's a personal preference- the way you decide to spend your money. Some people would rather spend their money traveling or buying a mountain bike than on an expensive car. It's a personal choice and one nobody else has the right to stand in judgement of. I think people who are paranoid of engagement rings are probably a little insecure about losing their own individuality in their relationships.

I don't wear my engagement ring, and only wore it briefly when
we got engaged. In fact I don't wear a wedding ring either
and that has no bearing on my relationship with my husband
or our devotion to each other. A ring is like a tag on a wild animal.
I am not an animal to be tamed. Furthermore the "lifetime"
pollyanna attitude that Steve describes in his article (which
is more or less one long run-on sentence)is quite nauseating.
Yeah that ring will make everything all right when you are
fighting tooth and nail over it in the divorce. Oh, sorry,
that's right, that won't happen to you two. I just really found the entire
article a big cornball, faux sensitive guy SNORE.

I like the idea of making the engagement known with a ring, it gives you something to count on.
But what I hate is whenever you see a couple get engaged in the movies, you always see the girl peering in at the ring and saying, "Oh! It's so beautiful, blah, blah, blah!" but shouldn't you really, at that moment, be focusing more on the idea that this person wants to marry you and how wonderful that is? yea, i'll admit that how the ring looks does kinda matter, but come on! not right then!

I love wearing jewelry but I do not want an engagement ring because it's just not me. I'm an artist and a designer so I am constantly using my hands. I wear jewelry when I'm going out but usually I need my hands free to get messy. I don't like that the engagement ring is often a symbol wealth, like "look how rich the man I'm marrying is!" I don't plan on deppending on my husband for money and I don't think that it's practicle for him to spend a lot of money on a ring I wont wear.

Hell yeah! It's the one time in your life when your guy will buy you something totally for your pleasure (or at least the one