Some years ago a major magazine published a cartoon showing two ardent outdoorsmen in a boat. One was saying, as he uncorked a bottle, "Beer's all right for trout, but for pike and bass--give me a nice, light ale!"
My first reaction was a laugh. My second--the feeling we've all shared--was that there is great truth in humor. The only thing "dry" about most fishing is a certain type of artificial lure. So I believe that we should make a study of what is the most appropriate beverage to imbibe while angling for certain specifies of fish.
The problem is not simple for the reason that there are more types of fish than types of alcoholic refreshments. We must, therefore, categorize according to the size of the fish sought, where it's taken (stream, lake, ocean, river and so on) and the general climatic conditions that prevail. We will attempt to equate the sporting qualities of the fish and its locale with common and necessary tonic beverages.
Let me begin by saying that I don't think beer (or ale) should enter into it. There should always be beer, unless the temperature, such as often occurs while ice fishing, is below the freezing point. Beer is as necessary for giant tuna as it is to the quiet worm-dunker, half-asleep in the sun, hoping, not very hard, to pick up a few crappies to prove to his wife that he really was fishing for the good of the family larder, not just out to have a splendid time by himself--an attitude all women violently oppose.
Nor are we discussing what you should have back at the camp or the cabin or stuck off somewhere in the boat. We are referring to the niceties of liquid refreshment that a man can and should carry on his person or as part of his regular equipment. In short, gentlemen, we speak of that noble instrument THE FLASK. For those who are needy of potions requiring a high or low temperature, we will later propound the advantages of the "short Thermos."
The flask should carry your initials and those of your next of kin in case of accident--or worse, loss of the flask. If you favor spinning tackle, trolling equipment or any sort of inexpensive glass rod, the modern (and unbreakable) polyethylene flask is good enough. If you are a purist favoring dry flies, Orvis rods and multi-pocketed tailored wading jackets, you are in a position that necessitates the carrying of a nickel, silver or pewter container.
If you favor bass plugging after dark, your flask should have a luminous paint finish and some kind of floatation should it be dropped overboard. If you are a "still fisherman" of the 25 cent bamboo-pole-and-string variety, I'm sure you have long since chosen the proper Mason jar, and have carefully protected it with several wrappings of friction tape.
As you can see, I am making the tacit recommendation that you have a "wardrobe" of flasks so that you may suit the flask to the fishing. There is nothing more distastefully showy than a man deep-trolling with a hand line (probably with a live frog and a June bug spinner) and flashing an engraved silver warmer.
Almost as bad, but not quite, is a correspondent of mine, one E. Schwiebert of New Jersey, who so favors handmade bamboo rods of the ounce-and-a-half persuasion that his flask has been veneered with simulated wickerwork and tasseled in the basic colors of a Royal Coachman. One affectation is as bad as the other.
Another bad example of the showy is a wealthy playboy, E.Z. of Scarsdale, who has had made at considerable expense, hand-fitted flask covers in various plaids to match a variety of fishing shirts.
But, as important as the flask is, it must remain secondary to the selection of what fills it. This may be best explained by example: If I were, for illustration, fishing for salmon in Norway I would carry a silver flask filled with aquavit. Or on the Miramichee in New Brunswick, a pewter flask brimming with an eight-year-old Canadian rye. Another: smallmouths in the Rangeley Lakes of Maine (using a 5-1/2 foot plug rod of bamboo) require a gallon jug of 1959 hard cider.
See how simple it is when given a little thought? But it can get tricky. Imagine being invited to try a private beat for salmon in northern Britain. You guess a fine dry sherry? Wrong. Here it depends on the size of the fish. Sherry is fine for trout, but for grilse you must stay with an 86-proof scotch.
In America, it's really simple, disregarding the local exceptions that we cannot go into here. For stream fishing (I assume for trout) we like to stay with applejack, or scotch if you're east of the Mississippi River (with the exception of Pennsylvania, where it is preferred to offer rye).
When lake fishing--and we can pretty much disregard the size of the fish since the majority of fishermen do likewise--I like to stay with brandy when the weather's cold and favor a red wine when summer comes.
Speaking of hot and cold brings us to the vacuum bottle. Again it isn't too difficult for our common sense to see us through: whiskey sours, john collins, and toddies when the weather is chilly or we are on the lake. For warm-weather or stream fishing, gin slings, rum, and tonic or a nicely chilled white wine and soda will see us through without disgrace; these also do very nicely on salt water, and are especially well received amid a nice run of blues or fluke.
This, gentlemen, I consider just a basic primer and it is done in answer to many requests. Local options make really sweeping generalizations impossible. If, for example, you plan a sturgeon jaunt along the Snake, or a week afloat on the Arkansas, I will answer you according to your specific needs.
You may have noticed I have neglected to mention the martini. One cannot really limit the use of the martini or presume to dictate when or where it cannot be taken. I once advised a Mr. Cornelius Ryan to carry his martinis (without which he would not fish) in a hot-water bottle since he is a notoriously poor wader and we feared either breakage or loss from a fall. This has proved extremely successful since most of his companions now think he is slightly arthritic and don't let him cut camp wood, cook, or dig the latrine. Moreover, he can carry it into his sleeping bag without around undue comment.
This story originally appeared in Mostly Tailfeathers by Gene Hill. Copyright (c) 1971-74 Gene Hill. All rights reserved.