What Goes Up Must Come Down

By Linda Jensen

Here I am, sitting with 200 other people at 33,000 feet above Colorado on a flight from Los Angeles to Chicago. I am wearing a long skirt, blouse, low shoes and a little make-up.

My name is Linda but my ticket is issued to me in another name - my male and legal name. The captain has just advised those of us sitting on the right side of the plane that below we can see Winter Park and Vail but my thoughts are on finding a way to change myself out of my feminine guise before I have to catch my connecting flight home to Montreal. Its a change I don't want to make but I when get to Montreal I will have to pass through Canada Customs and my girlfriend will be meeting me. Both prospects are extremely frightening.

At this point you may be asking yourself what kind of a fool would get her/himself into a situation like that. Maybe an explanation is in order. I was finishing another of my nine day vacations in southern California where I had been able to spend almost all the time "en femme"(as we say in Quebec). I had a glorious time doing the usual things, visiting malls, going to the Queen Mary in L.A. and the Brass Rail in San Diego but also pushing the limits a bit by going as Linda to a King's hockey game, to a golf driving range and sunbathing around the motel pool. In San Diego I spent part of an evening in the bar at a major hotel. I also met a lot of great new friends at felt fantastic when they complimented my appearance. Then came Sunday morning and it was time to pack up Linda's things and head for LAX and the flight home. It was a pattern I had followed perhaps a dozen times in the previous eight years. However this time I found it impossible to let go of Linda.

So Linda got packed, dressed and checked out of the motel. Returning the rental car to Alamo was a breeze and, despite a long line up, so was checking in with the airline. I had to show my male identity passport to the counter clerk but she didn't bat an eye. I set off the metal detector at security and was somewhat thrilled to hear the girl call out, I need a female check here. The girl with the metal detector determined it was my necklace, watch and belt buckle that triggered the buzzer so I was let go without a "strip search".

While waiting for the flight to board I had a minor anxiety attack and headed for the first class lounge hoping to find a place to change clothes. However the lounge had a calming effect and the friendly reception by the attendants strengthened my nerves for the flight so I simply touched up my makeup and settled in with a coffee and a magazine to await my flight.

That brings me back to the present. I'm seated in 6E, my seat mate from Australia is asleep. The flight attendant, Beth, is gorgeous and although she must know I'm not what I'm trying to appear to be, she gives me great service with the nicest smiles but I would be surprised if she would have any suggestions for my dilemma.

I think I have been careful enough to pack in my carry-on everything I will need to transform to a male identity. I plan to keep on my feminine undergarments and shed the rest in favour of gray flannel slacks, a dress shirt and a sweater. I know I packed appropriate shoes but did I remember socks? Will I be able to remove all traces of make- up?

Here I think are my options:

2) As the plane unloads, step into the forward lavatory and complete my change by the time the last passengers unload. That gives me about four or five minutes.

3) Go to the airline's first class lounge at O'Hare and use its restroom to change in one of the toilet stalls and slip out when the coast is clear.

4) Change on the flight to Montreal.

I really can't decide what to do. What would you do?:

Change at seat | Change in plane lavatory | Sneak into OHare lavatory | Change on Montreal Flight

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