"John" told me that, as a teenager, he enjoyed dressing in his sister's lingerie, especially her panties, hose, and tights. John was so nervous as he told me this, and he looked so sweetly worried and embarrassed that I had to try very hard to look only supportive and affirming. Actually, a million questions were running through my mind. Foremost, not surprisingly, was the thought that John was gay and either was warming up to telling me that little secret, or had not yet figured it out for himself. Either way, I knew that I had to get some more information.
I hied myself to the local gay/lesbian bookstore and checked out some books on cross-dressing. Imagine my surprise when I learned that most men who cross-dress are not gay! Hooray! I had John all to myself! No competition from the cute guys next door!
I read "Sexual Outlaw" and some other first person accounts on transgenderism, cross-dressing, etc. I had always fancied myself a liberal, open-minded woman, and I had long thought that socially defined "sex roles" are historically oppressive. Now my eyes were opened to a whole new outlook on things. I also saw John as exceptionally brave, both in accepting his "outlaw" sexual feelings to himself and (especially) in expressing them to me.
About a week later, I had the occasion to slip a pair of black panties onto John while we were making love. Instant fireworks!!! I could see now that this cross-dressing stuff could work for both us.
From that time on, John and I have incorporated his cross dressing into our sex play. About once a week, John gets "dressed up" by me, his Mistress of the Night. His tastes as "Monique" (Oh God, it *would* be something like 'Monique'!) run to the flashy and trashy, but that's OK with me so long as its in the bedroom! With me, John has gone far beyond the basic panties & tights outfits to experiment with make up, hairstyles, dresses, heels, etc. I hope that some day John will be brave enough to really step out en femme, but if things stay the way they are now, that's OK by me, too.
Actually, last Halloween (that favorite holiday of closet cross dressers), John did dress up and go into public. All night long he was complimented up and down on his gorgeous long legs (he's 6'4" and he shaved for the occasion), high cheek bones and slim, sexy body. It didn't bother me that his legs are prettier than mine. Really it didn't. Really. Seriously, though, John is an absolute stunner when he dresses up.
I don't know how typical our experience is, but I do know that John's desire to cross dress has added new and wonderful dimensions to our life together. Aside from the sexual aspects of it, we feel a rare and special bond of trust, acceptance, and fun because of it.
If you would like to contact me with questions or comments, please send correspondence through Cindy Martin. I would love to hear from you.
Love, Josie
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