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Reader Suggested Topic through May 2:

Is sex an important part of your TG life? (Polite answers only please!)

Who has been the role model for you in your TG life so far?

Updated April 24

Well, I did not have any ONE role model. But rather through meeting several wonderfully careing people, both on the net and locally, they have given me the courage to come out, tell my wife and become active in the community--as much as time allows. I do admire those fortunate few whose wives have been not only supportive but a active participant..SIGH!

Diane

A s for my role model, it would have to start with a combination of my sister in law, who is very understanding, and include a couple of my High School teachers, who still don't know. However, it would definately NOT include my wife who is extremely non-supportive either by choice or whatever. It has driven us almost to the breaking point and, at times, me to the point of tryign to contact Dr. K. in Michigan.

Robyn in Illinois

An odd confession..."My Mother," I believe. Oh, would be nice to offer that it's been Cindy Crawford or others of the many sex kittens. Perhaps that's just the fantasy but the real one just has to be that frumpy, dumpy, "Ma." The rest is only an illusion.

aquerry@paonline.com

Most important moment? It has been the whole last year! I lost 65# so far (wear a size 12!), joined a great fun/support group, and found all of you on the internet to help me along! But, by far, the most important has to be the acceptance, love, and support of my wife! Thanks everyone!

Huggs, Jayne

Came out to extremely non supportive wife almost 22 years ago, and for the most part, my life has been barely tolerable ever since. Then one day, I got signed up on the Net and while cruising along, I stumbled across the "Forum". Boy has it ever made an enormous difference. I have found that my situation is more the norm than the exception, and I"m still finding extremely useful suggestions on not only how to cope, but also, HOW TO ACCEPT MYSELF FOR EVERYTHING THAT I AM. TO BELEIVE IN MYSELF, and most of all - BE PROUD OF MYSELF AND EVERYTHING I REPRESENT AND STAND FOR. Thanks for Everything ---

Robyn

I came out to my girlfried the other day. At first she was supportive,but i feel she has problems with it.Sometimes I feel so alone.

I recently came out to my girlfriend .She says she's alright with it,but I know she has her problems with it.We go shopping together, but I don't get to try anything on. I hope one day to go out with her in drag.

SHARON

Telling my partner I am a crossdresser. Her acceptance has allowed so many great things to happen since then. Yvonne

My most important moment in my TG life, was when I found out I wasn't alone in the world.

-- Kay Elle {{{Hugs to each and everyone of you}}}

What has been the most important moment in your TG life so far? Finding a supportive therapist, who understands the gender issues and really seems to care. shv19@allinux1.alliance.net

The most important thing has been my wife's acceptance of who I am. It has been hard but it is an obstacle that we've overcome And I must thank my friend and hypnotherapist for helping my wife understand

MelissaNJ2 :)

The most important moment in my TG life was finally realising and acceptingthat I was MTF. Believe me I struggled for a long time with the whole concept but now I am elated to be finaly free and find such support at TGF.

at62@dial.pipex.co.za

M y most memorable moment cross-dressing was the first time I went public at "Brooke."

H i all I'm a married c/d. My wife has no idea!!! I wish I could tell her how good it makes me feel to have her garters and panties on!! GOD LOVE THE WOMEN WHO UNDERSTAND!!!! Hope to come out soon

C.P.

The most important moment in my TG life occured 2 days ago. I went to a new doctor to talk about eventually recieving hormone therapy. We talked for about five minutes, he commented on my age(I turned 18 only 2 months ago) and then gave me 6 weeks worth of estrogen to start immediatly! And to boot, on the way out he said I'd make a cute girl! I'm still pinching myself to see if it was all a dream!

af037@chebucto.ns.ca

I have been trapped for 40+ years and it's time to change.

Shelly

My role model was my EX!!! girl friends mother. She ALWAYS dressed to the hilt!

T he most important moment for me was when I finally went to our local support group. It took a great deal of effort, a great deal of risk of exposure, and a lot of courage! After almost backing out, I decided to go through with it, and I am very happy I did. They were a great help, and I was very proud of myself for overcoming my fear. Another step in the long road to self-acceptance.

Victoria C.

Please help! I've come across some creams in the UK which claim to develop the breasts and nipples. I am anxious to try these. Has anyone out there any experience of these products? If you can help with any information on breast development please reply to Rachel on 74462.314 @ compuserve.com

Girls, My most important moment was the first time I wore makeup, panties, and stockings. I knew I had found a most important part of myself -- a part I thought always was there but had never experienced. I kept looking at myself in the mirror and never wanted the feeling to end! It was a peak experience... there are few times since I ever remember being so elated! I was 12 and I looked like a 12 year old girl -- I wasn't hairy (ugh!). Whenever I get down, I think back on that first time and it buoys me up.

Kisses,
Karen

My partner Marilyn. She just had her SRS less than two weeks ago. I've known her for a half year and we fell in love since then. She's my mentor, big sister, teacher, advisor, guide, confidant, lover. She's everything to me and because of her I will be the best transsexual I can be and find the happiness I have been seeking within myself for many years.

Kelly

My role model has to be my wife. After six years of marriage she though it would be cute if she could transform me into a woman be cute if she could transform me into a woman. the results were so good that she continued to encourage and help me in accepting the woman inside. We spend every weekend as sisters, going shopping, out for dinner, to the movies, etc. With her help I pass without question and have become very comfortable in the feminine role. Having never crossed dressed before, I had no idea how much fun it could be. ( alot of work too).With my wife's blessing, I would like to continue down this road to a higher level of feminization, complete hair removal, letting my own hair grow out, breast implants, hormones and live my life as a full time woman. I know this may be difficult but with my wife's help I believe it is not only possible, but neccessary.

Love your always
Jenifer

I am 17 year old TS. I realize that I am not alone and I'm not the only one someday I will be able to be proud to be the woman inside.

Krista

I have been CD for over 25 years and I am now 37. I have just shared my feeling with my S/O who at this point has not said much other than she is not ready to see me in femme. My life has truely changed since I have met so many sisters on the net who have offered support and their love. I look forward to the day when I start my transistion.

Donna

The most important thing in my TG life was when I was able to let out my feelings and let the world see the person I really am

Krista

Janet: I am an 18 year old CD and I know what it's like hiding things from relatives. I dress up more around my parents now and they're cool with it. I say don't try to be what you're not. Imagine having your kid find out one day, wondering why you never told him. Raise them with love and truth. eagles@students.uiuc.edu

My most exciting moment as Debbie was dancing at a large straight Mnightclub in Tampa / Ybor City. I was standing on a huge audio speaker about 10' up in the air alongside the stage dressed in a short wrap around black skirt and black lace top stockings with thigh high black boots. Slowly as I danced - I removed the skirt showing off 'proudly' my long legs and the crowd went wild - girls and guys ! As I danced I slowly removed the black lace top and all I could see under this huge spotlight was a mass of people all yelling together "Take it off - take it all off baby !"

Guys began to stuff dollar bills inside my boots and the secutity guys were standing next to me shaking their heads saying ' no more clothes off Debbie' .

That began almost 3 years of weekend go go dancing at this and other clubs - lots of money and new friends. Never once in all these 3 years did I ever have any problems as Debbie and I loved every minute of it. I had plenty of real girls tell me I was living every girls dream up there on the stage and I did feel like a showgirl in the spotlight every time I danced. I wore everything from bikinis to sequins and tried to make every night different in my appearance. It is so much fun being a bad girl - not a a lady ! Debbie

The most important moment in my TG life was finally realising and accepting that I was MTF. Believe me I struggled for a long time with the whole concept but now I am elated to be finaly free and find such support at TGF. at62@dial.pipex.co.za

My most important moment in my TG life, was when I found out I wasn't alone in the world.

-- Kay Elle {{{Hugs to each and everyone of you}}}

What has been the most important moment in your TG life so far? Finding a supportive therapist, who understands the gender issues and really seems to care.

shv19@allinux1.alliance.net

T he most important thing has been my wife's acceptance of who I am. It has been hard but it is an obstacle that we've overcome And I must thank my friend and hypnotherapist for helping my wife understand

MelissaNJ2 :)

Telling my partner I am a crossdresser. Her acceptance has allowed so many great things to happen since then.

Yvonne

I came out to my girlfried the other day. At first she was supportive,but i feel she has problems with it.Sometimes I feel so alone.

SHARON

I knew I wanted to be a girl the first time my wife urged me to wear her pantyhose under my suit. Now I never leave our house without that Sheer Elegant feeling.

The most important moment? When I made the decision to join a TG support group. Joining the group was the first step to real self-acceptance for me. It pulled me out of a long depression and started me on the road to transition. I found the support and information I needed. Within days I began living part-time in my prefered gender role and I've never looked back since. Now, 1 year later and 3 months into HRT, I'm much happier, and looking forward to the future.

Amanda

H urm, that's a tough call. I think I would be Jamie Lee Curtis, since s/he is already what I want to be; both/neither. BUT, if I have to choose a one or the other, then for female, I'd want to be Lena Horne because she is utterly amazing, and for male, I'd choose to be Jeff Cadiente (a lesser actor -- he plays Ussiel in The Prophecy -- what hair, what cheekbones!). Yeah.

noeyes@nwrain.com

That undefined time when I finally accepted my self and began to take pride in being feminine. It wasn't so much a specific event as it was sort of evolution

Leslee

When I came out as Transsexual a realization came over me that I'm also Bi-Sexual. As a full time pre-op I have the best of both worlds. And as a post-op, I will have the same. I realized at that moment that Transsexualism and Bi-sexualism is a devine gift. Thank you, God.

Peace,
Kelly Ann

Most important moment? Making the decision at 22 to changeover. No question.I'm 30 now, my life is 1000% better. I'm attractive, happy... stealth... what can I say?

Anne

It has got to be my first trip in public. Having fought my tsism for many years because of my height, last December having made an appointment to see a psychiatist in London, UK I ventured out for the first time dressed as Fiona. I walked in total about one mile and although terrified I was truly happy for for the first time in my life. I was finally myself. My elation was further heightened when my condition was confirmed and I found myself finally on my way. Fiona Scott.

Being totaly accepted by my SO! Her understanding, compassion and love has made the difference.

So you want to satisfy the "birmingham criteria" I know for many the greatest fear for the m-f transition is what to do to pay the bills.. What it takes is some determination, some luck and the ability to take a few knocks. Now, having been through this I have the great pleasure in going to my therapist and telling him that I earn more.....(Stuff that up you Don) Anyway If I can do it so can any of you passing down this path. Good Luck All, In an infinite Universe anything is possible

Becks

Who would I be and why?? I have taken years to develop, accept and finally openly express my femininity, so I would stay me.

Leslee

The most important event so far has been telling my wife. The most fun thing been shopping with my CD friends and meeting the community for our state. I've been fortunate in having sisters to tlak my concerns with. This helps me through tough times. My first sister was on the internet, she helped my find my way. Big sisters are very important to talk to and as a sounding board.

Diane

The most important person in my cd life is a wonderful woman who coaxed "Jamiel Lynne" out into the open. She has allowed my feminine side to grow.

I would rather be a female, although I was born a male. It is not a matter of want, but rather an internal need to become the way I have always felt. I often talk to people who 'want' one thing or another and I realize how different the gender issue is for me. It is not a matter of 'wanting' anything, but a need to put thing right. r.byers@ix.netcom.com

I I would love to be a female. I just love curling my hair and wearing soft femimine clothes. I have cross dressed before, and my wife is getting use to it, she helps me with my hair anyway.

Kiley

If I could be anyone it would be Shania Twain. She is oh so sexy! She also seems very down to earth.

Michelle

Right now both. I was born M, but find more and more that I must be F in order to be happy and feel complete.

That's easy! It would have to be Marilyn Monroe. Few have had to fight harder against a gender role chosen for her by society. When you separate the myth from the person, she was no different than anyone else.

Yvonne (Ed. Note: Well, maybe a little different, Yvonne!

I believe that I am physicaly male, but mentally female, therefore, it makes sence to me to become physicaly a female, I think my tempermant is best suited in a female body, right now I feel that I am play acting as a male.....

Roxanna

T his is my first post so just a quick thought. I love being Metria, My freinds like me better this way to. However have any of you had the one big fear that I have in the back of my mind? Since I have spent the entirety of this life wishing I had been born a woman, could you imagine in the next life if there was one, being born a woman, and wishing you had been born a man? God The irony....

Metria@Medworld.net

I would like to be Anna Nicole Smith. because she proves that big girls are beutiful and sexy.

Stephanie

H Hi! I'm Sara. I got into CD when I was 8, and at 49 now it gives me wonderful relief. Right now I am in my bra, slip, short navy skirt, and a casual blue chiffon top. Blue tights complete the picture. Full make-up and my blonde wig, and a squirt of my favorite Estee Lauder White Linen. My wife does not know, so I only dress when she is away. I like to visit the TV shops here in London - they always make me feel so good, and are so understanding. Three weeks ago I went in for a new short bob wig, and they could not have been more helpful. The girl showed me how to rbush it and care for it, and I think she quite likes TV's because she gave me a kiss! I had my slily underwear on, and a touch of White Linen, so perhaps she was a little excited. otherwise noone knows I dress, which is a pity, because I would really like to be with someone else when dressing, and perhaps help another TV to dress, then go out together.

Female definetly, There is soo much more emotion, style of dress, makeup, and ability. For me I as Female could wear either types of clothing, have earing, pearls, and long, short or medium hair

Tena

If, I had a choice and if there was true equality of the sexes I would be a woman in a heartbeat!

Hi! I'm a 16 year old male CD and this is my first time writing here.I was very confused until I got access to the net and found people like myself there.I still don't know where to turn to, even though a lot of my questions have been answered already by everyone here.I live with my parents and am still at high school.

I would absolutely love to be a Madonna type superstar,wearing all types of outrageous outfits on stage.Evryone lusting after me both men and women as I gyrate sensually in a light sweat under the bright lights! What a dream!

I'd be oh so happy if I could have been Jean Harlow. Such a combo of grace, charm, glamour, beauty.

FEMALE, no questions, no doubts. I am not unhappy with my male self. I am a successful (PhD) and, according to my transgender Therapist, well balanced. BUT

Wow! How many times have I asked myself that question? Over and over again I keep coming back to ... female. Even with the sexism, the menstrual period, and the advertising that tells you have have to look like Cindy Crawford to feel good about yourself, so what! The benefits are there, no facial hair, no pattern baldness being able to bear children, I could go on and on.

Right now, I wouldn't give up either. I love both sides of my personality. However, as time goes on things change, and if it came down to one or the other, there would be no question. I would, and could live completely as a women. I don't think it matters which choice would be made, it would only matter whether or not you are at peace inside. Donna

The person I like the most is my "femme" self . She is so sensual,caring and understanding.

SGGQ10A@prodigy.com

If a 6 were only a 9 I'd truly be alive full-time.

Peace,
Anna

According to Dr. Lea Scheaffer. I'm a 1. There was and probably still is a profile test that she (a GG with a Phd) devised. I really feel sorry for the people who are born one gender grow up the same gender and die without having experienced any of the other 50% of humanity. I really consider myself to be very lucky to be a one of the Chosen!!

Linda

I would guess I am a "6" on the scale. I consider myself a bigenderist now, instead of a TV

Most definatly a 9, when you consider dressing and passing is an obsession that cannot and will not be cured. I do however draw the line at the big cut! I like both roles.

10 Definitely ! And if you don't believe me ask my therapist, who diagnosed me on my very first session.

Tanya :)

Hi it's Shelley, On a scale of one to ten I guess I'm somewhere in the middle. I love to CD and I think about it all the time. I am married and I love my wife, however when I get dressed up I fantasize about being a real woman and I want to make love with a man.I can't help it sometimes and I hope what I just wrote isn't too risky but that what some times makes me wonder if I rather be a woman instead of being a man. Does anyone else feel the way I do?

Thanks for listening.
Shelley

Thought I'd better tell you I consider myself in a range between 5 and 8 depending on the ammount I need to dress in to reach that comfort zone. Sometimes in my daydreams I wish I could be a 10.

HUGS ROSALIND!

Hello to all. I am an australian 'male tv '.I have made contact for only one reason ,that I feel so alone since up till now there is no one that i know that feels as i do.i live in melbourne australia

vandonk@ibm.net

I would deffinately say that I am a 5, but I want to become a 10. Being Single, and Loving the fact that I have been a TV all of my life. Just wish that I could meet other Girls to Dress with.

Silkeye@aol.com

My name is Mindy and I am seeking TG's who would like to help me with a paper for an arts and identity class I'm taking. I am writing on the topic of gender out- laws. Mindy

6 I'm a transgendered crossdresser, in other words I'm a tad over the line.

--Septima

Based on my currnt state of mind probably about a 5. Would prefer a 8 but being married limits time out dressed. I'm trying to perfect the illusion to the extent the

Diane

I think I'm a 4 on the scale. Have been Crossdressing since I was about 5 years old,came out of the closet to my wife about a year ago. She has purchased some clothing for me but is not too supportive, can't dress when she's home,--- yet!

Huggs,
Stacy

On a scale of 1 to 10, I'm TS in the extreme, well actually past the end of the scale now. I'm discovering new things now and seeing a light at the end of a very long tunnel.

Love to you all,
Robyn Dee M.

I feel that I am about a four on the gender scale right now. Sometimes I think that I am as high as six, and as I get older I find that I am getting ever closer to the five mark (I'm only 20).

Kelly

Hi this is Brianna. Iwould have to say I'm 8. I love completely transform into a woman right down to the nails (red of course). I dress daily and make some club trips and would eventually like to take hormones. Then I guess I'll consider myself a 10. thanks for listening girls,

Brianna

As much as I dislike boxes and labels and classifications, I'll go ahead and put myself in at a level of
7 - or sometimes
8 - if the rest of the scale is:
9 - living full time as opposite sex
10 - SRS

Jami Ward

Definitely a 9.....have very strong TS inclinations, am intensely examing these feelings and letting nature take it's course
In2Change@msn.com

I think I must be around a "5." Or is that just sitting on the fence? I do not want to be "en femme" all the time sooo... thats why the "5." The flip side however is that I don't want to be male all the time either! Does that make me "the norm?" I wonder. Look forward to seeing the results of your survey. Thanks,
Dianna.

I am suggesting this as I am sick of hearing titles being put on people and things. There are so many variables in life that one cannot be just a crossdresser or a transexual, there must be a whole spectrum of different degrees of involvement in actions related to the opposite sex. Life cannot be measured in such black and white terms, my own involvement in CD'ing varies from complete happiness wearing just a pair of leggings with my own undies and t/shirt, to having the full treatment on other days to achieve the same effect. Happiness with our own conception of ourselves of course being the ultimate aim. I suppose that this could be debated to exhaustion and back again so I will stop here. I had thought of putting in -10=sexual fetishist but changed my mind. After all this is a family show isn't it?

Regards ROSALIND!

The first person to recognize my femininity, other than myself was a dear friend, a GG, who made it clear that transgenderism is not a curse. She helped me recognize my inner self and offered significant support in my development and in my confidence in expressing my femininity. Instead of trauma and guilt I was blessed with a positive input. My personal terrified reaction when I admitted to myself that I am "different" was replaced by a comfort in knowing that out in the world there are understanding and supportive people who make our (Transgender) journey acutally pleasant. Among other things she provided guidance in every way, and was the first person to take me on a public outing. Without her I might well be still in the closet. I think the TGF does a good job along those lines, providing positive support for those not lucky enough to have a friend as I did. She replaced guilt and doubt with confidence and pride. Thanks Lee, wherever you are!!

Leslee

A good friend and his wife were the first persons to know that I'm a cross-dresser. They'd ask me to come to a Mardi Gra swith them this past Feburary and I told them that I'll be dressing. She ask me directly if by chance I'm a crossdresser. I took a chance and said I am, and it's a very important part of me. Surprising they were kind and very understanding. It was an awkward moment, but glad I did.

Anna Marie

The first person to find out that I was a CD was my mother. I was about 14, and the reaction was not pleasent. She was mad, told me off and said the next time she caught me that she would send me to school dressed that way. Although many yrs have since past, she has come to tolerate it somewhat. The fact that I don't live at home, or talk about it has helped, I believe.

Allison

M y ex girlfriend caught me dressed up once. She was supposed to be gone for a whole weekend so I decided to get all dolled up in her favorite outfit (we were the same size). It was a black leather mini skirt, a red chiffon blouse, and an oversized black motorcycle jacket. Underneath I wore her matching black pantie, bra, and garter belt set. I wore black sheer nylons with 5" black pumps. With her long blonde wig, I could pass as her twin. After carefully leaving the garage (with the aide of my automatic door opener), I spent the whole day at the mall shopping. When I returned home, I thought I was safe. But she caught me instead.

I have been crossdressing ever since I was ten y/o .Growing up with my aunt and living with her I would wear her panties,bras,pantyhose and dresses whenever I could .When I turned 18 I finally told her and she has been very supportive .

Iwould not and could not go back to being only a male. Since my fiancee "surprised" CJ, we have developed a relationship that is far stronger than any I could have dreamed of. My male gender side is such a jerk at the most inappropriate times. My female self is having a profound affect on the male and allowing him to see the world from an emotional rather than "logical" perspective. My fiancee recently told me," you are a much better person as Cynthia than as Pat." I have found that CJ is working her magic on the male and my professional life is reaping the benefits! If anyone cares to correspond, my Compuserve Id# is 104355,3255.

I was 15 when my sister who is 22 caught me dressed at home. All she said was, "Finally, I have a sister". Two weeks later we both flew together to Hawaii for sports competition. I'm a swimmer and my sister had to escort me. When I arrived my bags didn't. For four days my sister made me be her sister. She did my makeup,shaving my legs, and assisted me in getting dressed. I was scarared going out with her, but I found it exciting. She took pictures of me, we when shopping and all kinds of interesting places - including teh women's restrooms! I haven't stopped dressing since then. Today, I still wonder if my sister really checked my bagage?

P. Kleier

The feminine attribute that I'm proudest of is my sensitivity. It is a special gift of girls to feel what other people are feeling and to sense their essence. Its intuition and emotion and an open-mindedness that comes from our lifestyle. It makes us special in good ways, gives my life balance, and makes me glad I'm a girl.

Hugs,
Karen

My name is Chris and I am a grad student at Arizona State University. My dissertation is about transgendered persons, their social characteristics and their gender beliefs. I want to know if anyone is interested in discussing their lives and beliefs via E-mail? If so please contact me at dasko1@imap2.asu.edu I hope to hear from you soon... Chris

Hi girls, I knew I wanted to CD when I was only six years old. As time went on I was ashamed by these feelings, but then I read that there is nothing wrong with it. I now buy all my cloths from Fredericks. I love wearing thight miniskirts and my five inch pumps. I still hide what I do from my wife and one day I would like to come out of the closet. Thanks for listening,

Shelley

My Fiance was the first and only to know.. (other than Halloween people) She reacted very poorly..

Shiela

I remember it was a few years ago, I was visiting my mother and the conversation got around to my childhood. Very foolishly I told her that when she was at work I used to slip into her bedroom and try on her clothes. Strangely enough this didn't go over too well, and she then asked me what type of clothes I had tried on, so I told her all of them,bras, girdles, dresses everything I liked the look of. Shortly after this she moved to another state and dosen't talk too much any more. Oh well such is life.

HUGS ROSALIND!

My ex-wife was the first to know after she found my "secret things." It was the worst day of my life, but also the first day of the rest of my life as without discovery I would never have sought help and began my exploration and journey. Today I am an active member of the Vancouver transgender community and work for rights and freedoms.

Love Septima.

At the halloween parade in NYC recently,I was dressed in a micro-mini and and black fishnets with four inch heels.My makeup was beautiful.I was ecstatic at all the attention I was getting from most men and my fellow homegirls. I guess my assets were the "complete package" as that evening I visited various places where I absolutely passed and desired by many attractive men.

JESSICA

Karen

My girlfriend caugth me one day all dressed up in my apartment. She started dressing me and showed me makeup. Once a month she would take me out on the town. One night while at a dance club she was invited to dance, then this cute guy asked me to dance. I accepted. Later he came over to our table and sat with us. Then he asked me out on a date. I didn't know what to say. My girlfriend excused us to the ladies room to talk to me. She told me that if I really wanted to feel like a lady then I should go out with him, but to see if we could double date. I did it by myself, was scared, but had a great time at dinner and dancing.

PAT

My wife. She confronted me with my night gown which my eldest daughter found in the dryer. Oh, boy. I'm glad she did. Now I'm getting the help I need to transition and learn to balance the male/female ratio within. For those of you in Michigan. Look up the Comprehensive Gender Services Clinic at the University of Michigan Hospital. Hugs to all.

Sara

Hi, Sophie here. I'm desperate to 'come-out', and get medical help, but terrified of the reaction of my parents. Anybody with suggestions please e-mail me.

Sophie

The first person to learn I was transgendered was my best friend, Jenni Edens, who I have known since we were 9. She was at my house overnight and apparently not as sound a sleeper as I had thought. I had taken to wearing a nightgown to bed each night, just because I felt better doing so, but had taken precautions not to get caught doing it. I got up and pulled the gown out of my drawer from under my shirts and while I was slipping it over my head she sat up and looked at me. I know when the collar made it over my head and I saw her I must have turned a thousand shades of red. She just kinda smiled and said, "It looks nice on you. Now let's get to sleep." She's been my best friend since the day we met and the fact that she accepted this in me made my heart leap for joy! I will never forget that night.

Ariana Darci McCarnen

The first person who found out I was a CDer was a girl friend I had been dating for 6 months. SHE LOVED IT!!!! she took me shopping, helped with make up, and taught me how to act as a lady. 10 yrs later... My wife now knows, but dosent accept or participate. She lets me wear panties but thats as far as it goes.....HELP!!!! ANY SUGGESTIONS????

I've been crossdressing for over 15 years but only recently found out about the vast CD community. I'm a member of Tri-ESS and went to my first meeting several months ago. It was the first time I've gone outside en femme and I loved it. I now go out shopping en femme and would not change my CD activities. By the way if anyone knows where to get mules (2-3" heel) please write

Kristy

At the risk of sounding somewhat superficial, those who have met Yvonne have commented most on my smile and my legs! Well, I guess that's good for starters.

Yvonne
http://www.albany.net/~yms/

I think my most feminine attribute must be my legs. I love the way they look when shaved

FKZZ98E@prodigy.com

As a crossdresser, my most feminine attributes are my devastating looks with professional makeup assistance and my ability to walk properly in 5 inch high heels.

DeeCD

Hello there...I wrote once before about trying to come to terms with myself. I have now decided to move to a new area (Boulder, Colorado) and am wondering if there are any T* groups out there. I will be out there the end of April, so any information is greatly appreciated.

Thanks, Melissa

Just the thought of this makes me giggle! Seriously though...it would be my capacity to look at everything from both angles. I have been able to down- right surprise others with my understanding based on my secret insight. As much as this can be a real tough thing at times (always governed by external issues-not internal ones), I wouldn't want my life to be any other way.

Rosalind (Ros)

I love my new personality which is more relaxed and free. My male self was too quick tempered and unloving. My wife of 21 years has told me that she would prefer Jayne anytime to what I was and would support me fully if I wanted to transition and stay with me! At this point I want Jayne to live, but not openly as I have teenagers. There may come a time in the future for Jayne to live, but for now she has to exist a couple days a month with my wife and best friend.

Jayne

P. Kleier

My bestlooking part of my body is definatly my legs. Nest is my face, especially my eyes, You have to see me to believe!

Kristy

I'd have to say the feminine attribute I like the most about myself are my feet. They are small for my height (5'9"), and I can wear ladies size 10 from any shoe store!

Jherri (In)

I'm a law student in Miami and I'm writing a paper on transexuals and the Americans with Disabilities Act. I'd like your comments. Should preoperative transexuals receive protection under ADA? What do you think are the disadvantages of inclusion? The advantages? I'll be taking both sides of the issue, so any comments would be helpful. Thanks.

Chantale

I am a 39 yr old closet heterosexual TV. I have been through divorce suffered many years of guilt because of my desire to let out and express my femme nature. My fiance just found a box of clothes and pictures. She is not leaving me over it but will not stay unless I give it up.

ranlen@e-tex.com

Laughing with the stars
as my dark blue dreams press against
the mirror,
Singing with the first flowers
as we first open
in the morning.

Lilly

If dressing is your real self, express it. Cherish what you are and let it grow. There are so many support groups and options available that didn't exist in earlier years. Live to be who you are.

traven@concentric.net

I think the most important femme attribute that I have is the ability to listen. Ive always been a good listener, but ever since I started expressing my femme side Ive learned to understand at a more emotional level. Also at the same time expressing my femme side has allowed me to learn to express myself with more emotion.

I mean generally males are taught that expressing themselves emotionally is not a good thing, but females on the other hand have always tended to express themselves with more feelings. Being transgendered has definitely allowed me to learn to express myself with more feeling. And although I may never know what it is to be truly female I can at least understand and relate to them better. Heck, Ive even learned a few things about myself along the way; and thats always a bonus!

Now if I can only get my courage up to actually go out as my femme self and see how I hold up in trying to pass.

airandir@ix.netcom.com

I have been cross-dressing for nearly 20 years. My wife does not mind,so long as I keep matters private. However, my children are approaching their teens, and I would like to be honest with them without causing them problems in school and elsewhere. Any suggestions?

Paula

I sit here in feminine nightclothes while my unsuspecting (?) wife sleeps. Silk panties, lipstick, and a pick chemise nightgown allow me to write to you all with abandon!

Love to all, Sharyn

Uhm. I'm female (like, born that way) and have always thought of myself as sort of both. When I was five, I read a story in (I think) OMNI about a sci-fi hermaphrodite, and I remember thinking "That's me! That's what I'm like!" I always played at being male characters as well as female characters when it was make-believe time. Now, in our local Live Action Role Playing Game, I frequently play male or androgyn characters. My body betrays me and now that I have some money, I want to become on the outside what I am on the inside. If anyone can make suggestions, I'd sure be in their debt. Also, I am looking for others 'like me' (whatever *that* means), people who should have been both genders yet neither. I know we exist, I mean, I think I'm proof.... Thanks. --

Tarpiel

My best asset is my legs. I've been a competitive swimmer forever, I'am 48 now. My legs are long and lean, and best of all I can keep them shaved for my swimming and dressing up.

Patti

I had to think a while about this one as I don't have too many female attributes worth talking about.

I feel though that as ROSALIND! I am more caring and supportive, I would go out of my way to help a soul mate and give more of myself than the male side of my persona would. This is probably not a very good thing to admit but I know that as a male in a work place that requires a lot of full on confrontation with a very undesirable section of the community in confinement I can't afford to let ROSALIND! show through at all. HUGS ROSALIND!

I'm gradually trying to improve the size of my breasts and have a reasonabl B cup with my wonderbra. Besides that, my favourite femme thing is red lipstick which I wear at every opportunity

Luv and kisses
Nicki

Can anyone suggest a clothing catalog for very tall women? I'm 6'4" and having a difficult time finding clothing.

At about seven I was caught by my Mum in some of her lingerie. She asked me why I was wearing her clothes and I remember replying because I felt happy. She asked me if I would have preferred to have been a girl. I replied yes - that was the end of the conversation and the subject was never brought up again. That was in 1947 - I am on the point of telling her that I have just began my transition. It is SO important to talk things through - if I had found my child this way I would have certainly discussed it and offered any and all appropriate help. Only one life we have - so make the most of it.

Fiona Scott

My name is Karen and I am a graduate student at U.C. Berkeley. I am writing a paper on Clinical Issues in the Transgendered population, and I am interested in hearing your opinions and comments. I would like to hear about transsexuals' experiences in therapy (good or bad?). If you would allow me to ask you a few questions via e-mail, please respond to kareno@uclink3.berkeley.edu

Although I am older then 12 (I am 19), I can relate to that boy. I still live at home, and because of that, I cannot dress except for a little makeup, which I fear dad may stumble upon. I hope my dad never finds out, and I will probably never tell him. Like me, I'm sure that boy has enough shame and guilt, and unless CD'ing starts to interfere with his life, he should be left alone. Personally, I hope my son does not become a CD, though I'd still love him if he was.

Victoria C.

The 12yr old was me and was caught by mom who told abusive dad. Got caught several times but they couldn't stop me. I have a son and daughter so this is an issue close to my heart. If I found out I would probably confront him but in a loving way. I would try to find out if his dressing was experimenting or if he was tg. Either way I would try to be as positive as possible. I have till now showered him with love so in confronting him, I would be working to educate him and build his self esteem irregardless of how he dresses. I had to educate myself, then understanding myself I really began to understand my parents when I realized they didn't care to educate themselves. I've come far alone he wouldn't have to. His mother knows and loves susan so he has an advantage already; love, acceptance and encouragement.

Susan

I f I knew my 12 year old son was crossdressing, I would try to talk to him and reassure him that he wasn't "sick or 'depraved'. I would let him know that I loved him no matter how he chose to express his gender. I carried my crossdressing secret around for years and the guilt and shame I felt at not being "normal" were horrendous! I wouldn't want my son to suffer through that kind of thing.

Would I -- Could I NOT be Transgendered?!? How wonderful it would benot to be so torn; so tortured. How wonderful to be "normal", but how boring, how empty to not know that there was so much more to me & so much more on "the other side". Ideally, it would be best to be a non-transgendered WOMAN, but of course that's the idea & the ideal isn't it? Unfortunately, it's also a virtual impossibility for many of us. There is so much complexity, so much diffi- culty just getting through life for folks that aren't transgendered, it's enticing to know that there was one less very, very big hassle in my life, but I really couldn't --wouldn't give up the wonder & delight of the feminine part of me.

Other Comments & Questions?- Email to:cindy@tgforum.com
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