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© 1996 Transgender Forum


January-February 1996

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Topics: Strangest things that have happened to you will crossdressed. Will gender diferences still exist 50 years from now? more...


I was driving from Texas to Illinois and decided to do the second day of the trip as Debbie. Everything went well until I stopped for a quick bite to eat in a small town in Arkansas. After having a pizza and salad at a Pizza-Hut, I was ready to get back on the road. I started to open the car door and could not find my keys in my purse. They were still hanging in the ignition with the doors locked. First I panicked...I was wearing 4" heel leather boots a short skirt and long blond wig. Then I went back in and asked if they knew someone who could help get me in my car. They said...sure...and called someone. A few minutes the local Sheriff showed up and proceeded to open my door. I was as nervous as anyone could be. After he got it open, I asked if I could buy him a pizza for his trouble. He said, "No dear...just looking at you in those boots has been payment enough"

Debbie


Actually, for me the most embarrassing thing if not the most entertaining thing, was my skin tight red PVC dress ripping up the back seam at Dragstrip 66 leaving Monika Dare's "der'ier

mk991@primenet.com


One time I was wearing my hottest little leather mini skirt and while I was bent over pumping gas into my car, the mechanic whistled at my cute piquant buttocks. I thought I'd take a look back to see if he was my gas station fantasy guy and shot gas all over him. Now he brings me cheese every Sunday and my car is in perfect shape. moth@tigr1.fhsu.edu
I was almost caught once just after I had put on a beautiful pair I was almost caught once just after I had put on a beatiful pair or red panties. I ducked quickly under my bed and was not seen. That was many years ago, now I dress fully whenever I can and particulary enjoy being out on a windy day. I love wearing womens undergarmets and glourious feeling when fully dressed.

Diane


Emily, the isbn no for your book is isbn 0571162517 it's published by faber& faber, 3, Queen St. London WC 1N
C an't comment on the topic, because nothing THAT out-of-the-ordinary ever happened to me while cross-dressed. I am unsure if this is the correct forum for the following query, but I am a young man, in school looking to purchase women's shoes in larger-than-usual sizes, perhaps size 14 EE, where they are inexpensive. I used to wear a 13 EE, but I grew out of them. Does anyone know of any retailers, catalogues or stores in the New York/New Jersey Metroplitan area that sells ATTRACTIVE heels, flats, boots, in larger sizes, that AREN'T too exp- ensive?

rmjs@eden.rutgers.edu


I have yet to go out in public fully dressed, but I can say it's a bit strange when people from work call me at home to ask a question. I feel comfortable speaking to them, but I wonder: "If only they knew who they're talking to!" I'd love to come to work "dressed" to show them. Somehow, though, I think I'd be browsing the "HELP WANTED" ads after doing that.

Suzy


I am fascinated by the sharp contrasts appearing in identity as a cross-dresser. Being a pilot, I fly airline aircrafts. Thousands of horsepowers at my finger tips. I wear a nice dark blue uniform, white shirt with some gold insignia, and I flirt with qute air-hostesses. Suddenly the scene changes. I am in a hotel room. My unform hangs neatly on clothes hangers. The pilot is gone, and the room is occupied by Monique.


Knock of the attacks on the Religious Right. Yea, maybe they are anti-gay, anti-TS/TV, but the world doesn't revolve around them. Truth is the gender community is all too pushy - we gotta have it our way because everyone ELSE is wrong. With that attitude we'll never get accepted. We need to step back, rethink our approach and work on showing them that we're more than sexual characters they see with groups like Act Up. We need to show them that there can be a place in mainstream life for us.

Janette


Last year while I was on a business trip I was staying at a hotel that had rooms facing inward, surrounding a pool and a credenza. I was in my room getting dressed while ther was a wedding ceremony and reception going on by the credenza. I forgot to close the blinds, only the sheers were closed and I forgot that with the room light on everything going on in the room was visible from the outside. Well, one of the wedding guests must have had a little too much to drink and he was watching me through the window. After I finished dressing there was a knock at the door. This guy wanted to know if I was interested in escorting him to the wedding! I am sure that he saw everything. I don't think that I was that good looking, or even passable so he must have been pretty drunk.

After I brusquely dismissed him I closed the shades and collapsed into a pile of jitters. I was waiting for the hotel manager to knock at the door. I didn't go out for the rest of the night.

The next day this guy recognizes me in the hotel restaurant and said Hi! At least he had the discretion not to make a scene with his friends. Now I am more careful about curtains in hotel rooms.

If anyone would like to chat, please E-Mail Tisha Arwen Hayes


In my early days of 'passing', I was driving up to the "QM" when I realized I was low on gas. I pulled into a garage and decided I would use the full service line for a change. The gas jockey - a muscular Mexican - paid far more attention to my car than he would if the driver had obviously been a male, making a great fuss about cleaning my windshield, etc. After, he leaned on my drivers window and commented about my dress, how nice I looked. I was terrified and just smiled sweetly and said as little as possible. I never found out if he knew what I was and was interested or whether I'd 'fooled' him, but I lay awake nights wondering what might have happened if he'd started off thinking i was a gg but then realized I wasn't part-way through! As I said, he WAS muscular!

Here's another incident as well .....

I was in the "QM" when I got approached by a guy who knew what I was and was obviously interested. He kept buying me drinks and lighting my cigarettes and started caressing me. He made it clear that he wanted to go to bed with me. Although I was then happily married and very straight, I was tempted ... not because I wanted to go to bed with a MAN, nor because he was particularly handsome, but simply because I had obviously turned him on so much. The feeling of power was awesome! He kept wearing away my defenses and I ALMOST said "Yes" but I finally chickened out. In the cold light of the morning I realized what a narrow escape I'd had and I now have some idea - in a way most men don't - of how "date rapes" can happen. For that, alone, I am grateful.

Chelsea Brown


On one of my 1st en femme shopping trips, my wife & I were in Phila- delphia & were pulled over by a cop for speeding. I jumped out of the car, presented my license & reg. & proceeded to give the cop the un- likely excuse that we were headed to a costume party & I needed a rest- room pronto but "obviously" couldn't use a ladies room.

The excuse was unlikely since: My wife had no costume on, it was Thursday night, I had on women's glasses & was dressed like a suburban housewife, not a party-goer & was simply too convincingly made up.

To my utter disbelief, he just shook his head, suggested I could use the ladies room in the bar on the corner & just said to slow down, be careful & get going! No ticket, no hassle, no problem. My wife was sure I must have bribed him! There definitely are nice cops!

bg@internetMCI.com


Being arrested by the San Diego police for being cross-dressed. I was stopped for J-walking and he got me on that plus cross-dressing. It's still on the books as being illegal and this P** decided to enforce it. He let me go on a warning for the CD, but I got a citation for the J-walking. Kelly Anne
w hile at a club meeting, I shared a room with a new member who was very nervous about coming out for the first time. Anyways, I dragged her to the meeting and then after the meeting, we took her with us to the local club to dance and have some drinks. While I was there, I was hit upon by about five different guys which really surprised me.

Anyways, after a while in the bar, the new member who was so nervous in the first place, loosened up a bit with a few drinks in her and started having a good time. She soon though left saying that she was tired and she went back to the motel to change, or so I thought.

After the bar closed and we all said our goodbyes, I ventured back to the room, thinking that she was gone. Popping open the door to the room thinking that no one was there, I was greeted by the new member along with another member laying on one of the beds. I can tell you this, they weren't exchanging makeup tips, that's for sure. I am sure that anyone with half a brain can figure out what was happening there. Now that is what I call very weird, indeed!

Theresa Richards


Hi Ladies, My name is Denise and I am the Vice President of the CHI DELTA MU Chapter of Tri Ess, (cdm@carroll.com). If there is anyone out here who is looking for a support group that meets monthly in northern New Jersey, contact me at the enclosed e-mail address

cdm@carroll.com


I'm 45 years old,with 4 grandchildren,married 26 years,college educated, conservative,republican,an ordained Minister & curreently pastoring a medium size church. Oh yeah, I am also a transexual. Boy, you talk about internal conflict! Sometimes when I am counseling folks, as I hear their problems I think to myself, thet don't know what real problems are. I have purged and purged and prayed and prayed, yet I find myself back on premarine, and living as feminine as I can. Shaved all body hair, including arms,and shaped brows. I dress as often as I can. I always wear feminine under garments, and the conflict rages on. My wife suffers so much, she sleeps in another room because she says that I am just too feminine for her to even sleep with. I really feel trapped.
Hi Girls! My name is Alana I live in Canada. Still not brave enough to pop out and say "HELLO" to the World yet. Maybe I need a push I feel Good and think I look fine. But Nervous I guess. Can any one Help me who's been there and done that? Let me Know soon All Bye for Now

Alana.... IN Canada


One night I put on a simple dress and drove to a little town north of the city I live in. I parked at a motel and walked about fifty feet to sit on a bench at the edge of a lake. Later, as I returned to my car, some guy on the second floor balcony of the motel began scream- ing stuff about "the Lord" and "repent" and "surely going to hell". Was he talking to me? I left, never to return to that spot again. dixon1@ix.netcom.com
To Emily,
The book you are looking for, by Caroline Cossey, is very good and available. Well it is in Ireland.
Yes, I think gender differences will be around in the next fifty years, because people will still look at the "package" and anyone goiong thru a gender change will still look like a half-breed for a while until the hormones take full effect. people will still be people no matter how many laws we pass.

ljd@ctree.cts.com


Sure, gender differences will always be there. Be it 50 years of 50,000 some things never change. Men shall be men, women shall be women, and those that cross over will be scorned! Sorry, I'm having one of those days.

ACROYEAR01@aol.com


The strangest thing that happened to me was being caught crossdressed with a neighbor kid when his mom came home unexpectedly.
Fifty years from now, as it is now, the only Gender difference that will matter is the one within yourself. Besides, fifty years from now if we keep screwing up the environment, we'll all be wearing spacesuits and no one can tell what gender you are.

Beverly


I am feeling a new wind of acceptance in the air. I am post - op but do a great deal of peer helping. My girls find that during transition if they are open and honest with the public not only are they being accepted but they are being encouraged for their bravery. The key is being open. Inpublic people do not like fakers. If you cross dressing to work and the other women feel that you are making fun of them, you will not be accepted. If on the other hand they know that you are going through this transition, you will find that you will be encouraged.

Any feelings or experoiences about this?

Elaine


I hope that 50 years from now gender will not matter. As a married closet crossdresser I'm only hoping.

P.S. I'm glad I've found a place to talk 8-)

Jimmina


I have over 50 years of experience as a T*/Cross Dresser. General public acceptance of blurring of gender seems to cycle, but seems to end up a little better on each up-side.

Marianne


I started dressing as a girl when I was maybe 9 or 10. Back then I feared anyone finding out! Today the kids are pretty open about it...
Just 2 yrs. ago, I'd have said that gender would gradually blend & be- come less critical to society. Given the increasing devisiveness of society today & the unwillingness to find common ground, I fear that the religious right will continue to force THEIR moral judgement upon politicians & others to define the gender roles that they feel are proper & "correct". But let's hope we'll all become more tolerant!
Yes. I have hobbies like sci-fi, PC's, internetting, I even did the body building circuit, but it was no hobby that inflicted me with transsexualism. It's a curse I would not wish upon anyone. I hope I am happier as a woman than I was as a man. I had the usual two choices, switch or die. I chose the former. I hope I didn't make a mistake.

Kelly Ann


Donna:

Regarding your friend in SLC. There is a brand new news letter there that has in it's first issue a list of several Utah professionals serving the community. It might be of intrest to her. She can get a copy of the news letter by sending a SASE (self addressed stamped envelope to: The Plain Jane Press, P.O. Box # 701694, WVC,Ut 84170.

keni


I've always wondered if we are at a key time in history with regard to gender classification. Perhaps our descendents will look at this time period and realize what pioneers we were, for I truly believe that there will be some form of a legitimate "third gender" (or more!) by 50 years time.

Lisa A., (DVG member)


I think in 50 years, young gender confused persons will have the oppurtunity to change sooner,and with better results.
Are you kidding??? With all the homophobia and transphobia I've encountered out here in what's suppose to be the most liberal place to live and express yourself in North America (California), I suspect that gender differences as well as intolerance and unacceptablility for the transgendered will be around as long as we have religious fundamentalists. Kelly Ann
Sure. Some my disappear. But I'm sure it will change anyway: there will be other differences then, too.

Hannah, Kiel, GER


Does anyone know of any good TV/TS books? I was looking for "my Story" by Cossey but have not been able to find it yet. Is it worth tracking down?

Emily


I keep hearing lables thrown around like they are important. How can they be more important than the people they are being used to describe? A person is still a person whether they are male dress in female clothing and like both sexes or any combination thereof. We shouldn't break things down into : this for for gay CDs, this for straight CDs, this is for gay TS, this is for sraight TS. All that will do is cause devisiveness in the ranks and limit the power we could weild as an allied community pushing for the right to be who we are sexually without being discriminated against.

Brandi


If you mean differences of opinion, yes people will allways have their own point of view. Perhaps fashions will change enough to make it hard to pick the difference but I don't think this very likely. In a perfect world gender differences would not matter to anyone but 50 years is hardly long enough for our world to become perfect. It seems that everytime someone takes a step in the right direction a dozen others take two steps back. Am I a pessimist or what?

Bye for now HUGS ROSALIND!


This thing on hobbies has been interesting reading! I am a 55 yr old hetero cd with a graduate degree in EE. I have met several people with similar backgrounds an414985@anon.penet.fi
Hi. I am a hetero CD who resides in San Diego. My hobbies are mostly technical in nature: Computers, Electronics, Ham Radio. Part of the reason I believe that I am the way I am is because these hobbies are so rigorous and do not provide much emotional satisfaction. Not only is CD'ing sexually satisfying, it is for me also a way to unwind and be at peace with myself.

Stephanie96


I enjoy dressing femme very much. Since my parents don't know about my being a TS, I must dress only when they are not home. My other hobbies include Sci-fi, music, and reading.

71212.656@compuserve.com


Wow! I never thought about THIS one before, but the two TG interests you listed have always been big favorites of mine! Music is the only bigger one. Could interest in trains be a psychological desire to move on to new "places" [genderwise]? Could the Sci-Fi part be a desire to explore the "unknown" or visit "new worlds" genderwise? Science Fiction often is linked to fantasy, so that's not a tough one to figure. Interesting! bg@internet.MCI.com
I am interested in High Performance sport cars. I currently drive a Corvette. Anyone else like high speed? I have had this one over 145MPH. Also I would like to meet someone who is TS in southern Arizona. I am about 70 miles Southeast of Tucson. Carol
Hey, you "Christian, Republican, dittohead, Traditionalist, straight" TV: Here's my address if you want to talk about it. Warning: I don't think it's wrong, and I'm often untraditional, and I don't know what a dittohead is, but I am a die-hard Christian, straight, and I vote Republican as often as not. So you're welcome to email me (confidentiality promised) if you want. Otherwise maybe I'll find time to post about it here sometime... Keep the faith.

jsdevlin@ucdavis.edu


Hi! Just wished to say, "Hello!" to EVERYONE. I am a pre-op, m-f, from Harrisburg, PA; age: 48. I know that I go into denial at certain times and stop my Premarin but my TG idenity always returns - it is so confusing at times. Take care everyone.

Lonna Gerrity


I've been crossdressing since I was 5.My interests are Sci-fi, model railrroading computers, music (jazz) synthesizers, computer music, photography and in reference to last week's topic, I think dressing up as a woman is the sexiest thing in the world.

Jane.


I'm a 34-year-old crossdresser who also has been a science fiction fan for as long as I can remember. In talking with a lot of other crossdressers on the net, I've discovered a lot also share my enjoyment of British television programs and science fiction. Also, I'm surprised how many are into "card" games such as "Magic the Gathering" or other Roll-Playing Games. Connection? Who knows?

Kerry


I'm a casual fan of science fiction, but a fairly avid Trekkie. I also am very interested in computers, and Thank God I am. At 52 (look a bit younger, thank goodness) it's only in the last year that I've really accepted myself as the person I really am, which is a fully transgendered hetero. I was thinking about the recent question of sensuality and transgenderism, and I think the answer has to be yes! I feel my most complete self, and fully sensual, when dressed, which includes tight fugure control garments such as girdles and corsets, and especially feminine lingerie, plus very high heels. I feel best when fully feminine, but (is this a curse?) also quite submissive, and am afflicted with the need to be bound and restrained, as well. I am so grate- ful for the chance to come out online, and wonder if this need to be bound (I especially love, sigh, latex) has any connection to my transgendered state.

Kelly95CD@aol.com


I have a lot of hobbies and i never seem to have enough time to indulge in them. They are; computers and computer chatting, (I'm a regular in Susan's Place!) I also enjoy making models of all sorts including dinosaurs and starships from various shows and movies, and I DO love sci fi including Star Wars and Star Trek. I also love to get out into the great outdoors and backpack or camp regardless of what the weather is like. This isn't nearly a complet list of my hobbies but they're my favorites.

Rachel Elaine


I am pretty new to the "scene". I enjoy my computer, and even have my first homepage: "http://home.earthlink.net/~mee/pamala" I enjoy music very much, definitley the grateful dead, melisa ethridge, and many others. I like Star Trek series, all of them. I enjoy X-files, Simpsons, hiking, and love being with my friends! I would love to go out dressed fem one day, but I dont have the nerve...yet!

Pamala


Music, all kinds of music (except Country), listening, playing piano. After that comes flying, Yoga, hikes in the mountains, walks on the beach, bicycling. I enjoy films that make me laugh and make me cry. And I never miss a Star Trek! To me, it portrays a world in which everyone is accepted and acknowldeged for who they are. It's a nice place to live a couple of hours a week, even if it is a fantasy. It gives me hope for the future.

Ever since revealing my TS nature to my wife of 22 years, certain old hobbies seem to have less of a draw. I've gone from a need to master flying skills to an appreciation of the freedom and beauty of the air. I still enjoy driving but my old Porsche is spending more time in the garage these days. Maybe it's because my longer hair gets windblown and tangled now =:)

Paul(a)


Hmmn... hobbies. Well, I have a few, but my biggest one would be music. I am somewhat of a semi-professional musician, but for how much I make at it I still consider it a hobby! I play a number of instruments, and I am also a collector of all types of music. Let's see, I also like to read horror novels and watch horror films. I am especially fond of zombie films... hmmn, this is turning into an odd post... *grin* I do like some SciFi, but I wouldn't say it is my favorite genre. And coming from Canada, I am a hockey fan also, of course!

Take Care, Aleisha Michelle


At age 68 I am finding it difficult to finally recognize tht I am a ts person. Support groups are difficult to find in southern Arizona, especially in a small town. Any suggestions?
Funny you should mention trains first off like that, all my life I've loved riding on, looking at and modelling trains. I've allways found that to imerse yourself in a hobby is one of the greatest forms of stress relief known to man or woman. I find gardening extremely relaxing also and when the rest of the family is away I can indulge myself in the interest of crossdressing whilst gardening as well Later this year however my time is going to be taken up with a University course in Psychology so the hobbys may have to take second place for a while.

Bye for now hugs Rosalind!


Trains, planes, ham radio, computers, video games. I pretty much fit the profile! In RGA, we have three train fans, and we bump into each other on rail fan trips all the time! I have thought of starting a TransGender Train Spotter society: TG-TS.

-- Jamie Faye Fenton


Star Trek big time!!! and this Internet takes up a lot of my time. (Check out my web site at http://asgo.net/~sarah/sarah.htm Music, (playing guitar and singing harmonies)... etc. etc. etc. Yeah, I really get into my hobbies.

Sarah


I was very involved in the paraculture (1980-1992) and the one thing that struck me more than anything was the variety and depth of interest in technical things. I think there was a disproportianate amount of Engineers, Electrical, mechanical, civil, etc. And the variety in hobbies went from astronomy to zoology and not just surface interest but a knowledge that was marketable and most of the knowlege was aquired throu personal experience.

wwalter1@ix.netcom.com


Most of us have something to do with the computer industry, either employed as a computer professional or have a strong interest or hobby relating to computers. Computer geeks, video junkies, PC game enthusiasts, net heads, etc. THAT'S WHAT IT IS! It's that damn radiation from the CRT's that poisoned my mind and turned me into a girl!!!!!! Oh well, I couldn't be happier now. Just call me the transsexual net head.

Love,
Kelly Anne
San Diego's Transsexual Menace Apprentice


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