Out and About

I dressed in a white blouse and red skirt and belt with white pantyhose and red heels. My diet has been working and my cincher and fanny/hip padding gave me a nice feminine figure. I styled and wore my layered dark red/brunet wig with wispy bangs down on my forehead. I used some new makeup and tried to follow Andrea York's cosmetic tips for contouring. I applied my press-on nails and added a brand new diamonique ring along with necklace, watch, bracelet and earrings. I thought that I looked pretty good.

This all took much longer than I expected or wanted, so I didn't get out of the house until almost 11:00. My errands were all to the various shopping malls. The first one is about 20 miles on interstate roads.

My first stop was my wig shop. I had dropped off my long blonde wig (I call it my dumb blonde look) two weeks earlier. I had asked them to style it up with wisps coming down at the ears and neck. I wanted something more formal and sensational looking and I wanted to see how I would look with hair pulled back instead of completely covering my ears and neck. The shop owner and sales personnel are very nice and spend time with me, trying on various wig styles and adjusting them for the best look. I always feel comfortable there. I have to tell you, they did a great job with the blonde wig and it looks great! I have it stored on a head and protected in a wig box. It will look great for some special evening out.

My next stop was Dillards Dept. store to look for a dress that I might wear to the theater or concert. I was looking for a "to die for" dress and I was leaning toward red. You know, the “Pretty Woman” look.

When I am out enfemme or shopping, I always keep my eyes open for security guards or other "interested" people. While I am not doing anything illegal, I don't want to get into a situation where someone suspects me of wrong doing and wants to question me or worse. Today, I saw a man carrying either a cellular phone or two way radio walking thru the dress dept. That was followed by a uniform security guard. I felt my antennae going up! That made me more fearful of being stopped and retained. I found four dresses that I liked and wanted to try on. I had heard that there was a state law making it illegal for a man to enter the women's dressing rooms of public/commercial stores. I decided to ask one of the sales ladies if I could try on the dresses. The young saleswoman said, "sure" and led me back to the dressing rooms.

An older sales lady, coming out of the rooms, stopped her and me and said, "No, I would not be allowed into the fitting rooms." This was the first time that I had been rejected. In fact I have tried on clothes in those exact same rooms and purchased them as well. She did suggest that I might take the dresses upstairs and use one of the rooms upstairs that had an "outside door." I'm not sure why! Instead I left and went to J.C.Pennys to see what dresses they had. Their loss!

At Penny's I was approached by a young sales lady asking if she could help me. I declined, saying that I was "just looking." After browsing, I found another four dresses that I wanted to try on. Again, I asked and was shown to the dressing rooms (no outside door?). I tried them on and liked two of them but wasn't ready to buy without looking around some more. Coming out of the dressing rooms, I handed them to the sales lady and indicated that I wished to continue looking. She said that she would hold on to the two I like while I continued looking.

I found two more dresses in Penny's Evening Wear Dept. and took them back to the dressing rooms. Another sales lady asked if she could help me. The first sales lady saw her talking to me and called from across the clothes rack, “I'm helping him.”

HIM?? That one word hit me like a ton of bricks. I pretended to have not heard her and continued to the dressing rooms to try on the two dresses. Once there, I had to sit down and compose myself. Was I more easily read that I thought? I have become fairly confident while shopping enfemme and thought that I "passed" if not closely inspected. Maybe my "passing" was only sales personnel being accommodating and not making a scene.

I left the store without making any purchases and departed the mall. Although, I had not finished my errands, I thought about discontinuing my day out enfemme and returning home. As I was driving, I realized that my gold "barrel" bracelet had lost its magnetic "barrel" ornament. It was brand new and I believed that I might have lost it in the Penny's dressing rooms. I returned to the mall and reentered the dressing rooms without any apparel to try on. The two stalls that I had used were in use. I couldn't knock on the doors and ask to inspect them. I went to another stall to wait for the customers to leave and give me an opportunity to inspect them for my lost "barrel." This stall had a number of dresses left behind by the last customer and they were in my size. I decided that I might as well try them on while waiting. I felt that it would be better if I was a customer rather than a possible "Peeping Tom."

After trying on the dresses and using whatever opportunity arose to enter the two stalls and inspect for my "barrel" ornament (which I found), I again left the store and the mall without purchasing anything. I felt better about myself so I continued with my errands and drove to another mall which had a Macy's Dept store, Victoria's Secret, and a Body Shop. I was still looking for a dress and also wanted a new camisole as well as bath and body products for use during my special day. At Macy's, I couldn't find any decent looking dresses but I did find a couple of blouses that I liked. I tried them on and decided to purchase one. I had absolutely no adverse reaction by either of the two sales ladies at the register. I proceeded on to Victoria's Secret and found a camisole and panty set which I purchased. Again, I had no adverse reaction. However, while walking thru the mall to the Body and Bath Shop, I felt eyes and observed that a man and women had obviously "read me." I gave up and returned home!

I know that at 6 ft tall and almost 200 lbs that I stand out when enfemme. I try to do all the things that would make me less noticeable and fit into the environment that I'm in, but I also feel that I have to dress more feminine (i.e. blouse, skirt and makeup vs. shirt, slacks or jeans and no makeup) to increase the feminine image. The conflicting indications that I was getting on Friday the 13th is very unsettling. My confidence is eroding. This could be good as well as bad. I obviously need to reassess my appearance. I may need to tone it down and try not to be so feminine as to be so noticeable. It's tough to want to dress and be seen as an attractive women and yet not stand out. I guess that I still have a lot to learn!