For many of us this presents the most difficult challenge; to enjoy self-acceptance, and to integrate our transgendered personality into our lives. Self-acceptance and personality integration are very personal, and very different for each individual. There are many ways to achieve personality integration and self-acceptance. One route to this inner peace and harmony is to utilize the techniques of meditation.
The reasons to try meditation are profound. The history of the human race has taught us that human beings have a greater potential for living, for learning, and for creative expression than we have the ability to use. After birth we are slowly "taught" the way we "should be," the way we should think. Much of what we are taught is how to put limits and constraints on ourselves and our thinking; so pervasive is this attitude that psychologist Max Wertheimer defined an adult as "a deteriorated child." "It is our fullest 'humanhood,' the fullest use of what it means to be human, that is the goal of meditation."
Why is meditation useful for the transgenderist?
To "loosen" the defenses for directed exploring of personal issues in a safe, guided, and useful manner.
To be more centered, and reduce anxiety.
Self-acceptance and personal growth.
To help achieve self actualization, and alternatives ways of seeing reality and ourselves.
The different types of meditations can be grouped into four general classes: intellect, emotions, body, and action. The methods and techniques used in each class will often overlap. No one way is "right," the right way is different of everybody. Meditations based on intellect focus on thinking about yourself, the world, and reality in a new way, often around some problem. By thinking about this one thing, and only this one thing, meditation forces us to a new view of reality, a new way of perceiving the world, and the problem. Much in the way scientists have done through the ages when trying to solve seemingly intractable problems. We create new paradigms.
Emotions based meditations usually focus the mind on our relationships with people and the world. These meditations help us expand our ability to relate to, and love others. Emotions based meditations are some of the most popular.
Meditations of the body are popular today in the form of T'ai Chi and Hatha Yoga. Following this path of meditation we learn to be aware of our body, and bodily movements through intense practice. Using structured body movements, and breathing, we train ourselves to be conscious of only our bodily movements allowing for meaningful self-exploration. T'ai Chi has the added benefit of providing an excellent program of aerobic exercise and stretching helping with flexibility, posture, and body movement control.
Action meditations concentrate on various activities like archery, flower arrangement, aikido, and karate. Most are based on some variation of the Zen tradition. Books on Zen and the Art of . . . you fill in the blank.
There are however, several books in this genre including Zen and the Art of Archery and Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (no kidding). Singing and prayer are examples of action based meditations in the Christian tradition. The key to action meditations, and all the rest for that matter, is total concentration. Your mind, your thoughts, must be gently focused on only one thing, the task at hand, whatever it may be. While that may sound overly simplifie d and ridiculous, it is very difficult.
A program of meditation requires daily practice, usually 10 to 15 minutes at the outset, and possibly increasing up to 30 minutes per day. One to two months are necessary to start to really benefit.
Depending on the type of meditation you pursue, there are a couple of important points to remember:
Start by taking deep, but comfortable breaths. On each breath out count. Count up to 4, and then start over again. Remember, count on your exhale . . . one, two, three, four, etc. As you are doing this you are to concentrate on only one thing, your breathing. The counting is designed to help you focus on your breathing. When you find your mind wandering, gently bring your thoughts back to your breathing. This sounds crazy but if you try it, you will find out how hard it is; especially for 15 minutes. Be patient with yourself. Being able to control your mind to this extent is very difficult.
Counting Breaths is a good way to get started. I would encourage anyone interested to explore all your options. The physical and mental benefits of T'ai Chi are especially useful for transgendered people. Below are a number of books on the subject of meditation:
The Tao of Leadership by John Heider, Bantam Books, ISBN 0-553-27820-7
How to Meditate by Lawrence LeShan, Bantam Books, ISBN 0-533-24453-1
Zen and the Art of Archery by Eugen Herrigel, Vintage Books
Buddhism: An Introduction and Guide by Christmas Humphreys, Penguin Books.
There are many benefits to working at meditation. They don't come fast, and they don't come easy. But it is well worth the effort. The feeling of peace, the ability to be open and receptive, to viewing the world in a new reality. It all sounds a bit to airy for some; if so, think about this, some of history's greatest leaders, thinkers, and business people increased their effectiveness and efficiency in daily activities through a process of rigorous meditation!
