Poems by Emily Dickinson
Book II.
Love.
- Proud of my broken heart since thou didst break it,
- Proud of the pain I did not feel till thee,
- Proud of my night since thou with moons dost slake it,
- Not to partake thy passion, my humility.
- My worthiness is all my doubt,
- His merit all my fear,
- Contrasting which, my qualities
- Do lowlier appear;
- Let I should insufficient prove
- For his beloved need,
- The chiefest apprehension
- Within my loving creed.
- So I, the undivine abode
- Of his elect content,
- Conform my soul as 't were a church
- Unto her sacrament.
- Love is anterior to life,
- Posterior to death,
- Initial of creation, and
- The exponent of breath.
- One blessing had I, than the rest
- So larger to my eyes
- That I stopped gauging, satisfied,
- For this enchanted size.
- It was the limit of my dream,
- The focus of my prayer,--
- A perfect, paralyzing bliss
- Contented as despair.
- I knew no more of want or cold,
- Phantasms both become,
- For this new value in the soul,
- Supremest earthly sum.
- The heaven below the heaven above
- Obscured with ruddier hue.
- Life's latitude leant over-full;
- The judgment perished, too.
- Why joys so scantily disburse,
- Why Paradise defer,
- Why floods are served to us in bowls,--
- I speculate no more.
- When roses cease to bloom, dear,
- And violets are done,
- When bumble-bees in solemn flight
- Have passed beyond the sun,
- The hand that paused to gather
- Upon this summer's day
- Will idle lie, in Auburn,--
- Then take my flower, pray!
- Summer for thee grant I may be
- When summer days are flown!
- Thy music still when whippoorwill
- And oriole are done!
- For thee to bloom, I 'll skip the tomb
- And sow my blossoms o'er!
- Pray gather me, Anemone,
- Thy flower forevermore!
- Split the lark and you 'll find the music,
- Bulb after bulb, in silver rolled,
- Scantily dealt to the summer morning,
- Saved for your ear when lutes be old.
- Loose the flood, you shall find it patent,
- Gush after gush, reserved for you;
- Scarlet experiment! sceptic Thomas,
- Now, do you doubt that your bird was true?
- To lose thee, sweeter than to gain
- All other hearts I knew.
- 'T is true the drought is destitute,
- But then I had the dew!
- The Caspian has its realms of sand,
- Its other realm of sea;
- Without the sterile perquisite
- No Caspian could be.
- Poor little heart!
- Did they forget thee?
- Then dinna care! Then dinna care!
- Proud little heart!
- Did they forsake thee?
- Be debonair! Be debonair!
- Frail little heart!
- I would not break thee:
- Could'st credit me? Could'st credit me?
- Gay little heart!
- Like morning glory
- Thou 'll wilted be; thou 'll wilted be!
- There is a word
- Which bears a sword
- Can pierce an armed man.
- It hurls its barbed syllables,--
- At once is mute again.
- But where it fell
- The saved will tell
- On patriotic day,
- Some epauletted brother
- Gave his breath away.
- Wherever runs the breathless sun,
- Wherever roams the day,
- There is its noiseless onset,
- There is its victory!
- Behold the keenest marksman!
- The most accomplished shot!
- Time's sublimest target
- Is a soul 'forgot'!
- I 've got an arrow here;
- Loving the hand that sent it,
- I the dart revere.
- Fell, they will say, in 'skirmish'!
- Vanquished, my soul will know,
- By but a simple arrow
- Sped by an archer's bow.
- He fumbles at your spirit
- As players at the keys
- Before they drop full music on;
- He stuns you by degrees,
- Prepares your brittle substance
- For the ethereal blow,
- By fainter hammers, further heard,
- Then nearer, then so slow
- Your breath has time to straighten,
- Your brain to bubble cool,--
- Deals one imperial thunderbolt
- That scalps your naked soul.
- Heart, we will forget him!
- You and I, to-night!
- You may forget the warmth he gave,
- I will forget the light.
- When you have done, pray tell me,
- That I my thoughts may dim;
- Haste! lest while you 're lagging,
- I may remember him!
- Father, I bring thee not myself,--
- That were the little load;
- I bring thee the imperial heart
- I had not strength to hold.
- The heart I cherished in my own
- Till mine too heavy grew,
- Yet strangest, heavier since it went,
- Is it too large for you?
- We outgrow love, like other things
- And put it in the drawer,
- Till it an antique fashion shows
- Like costumes grandsires wore.
- Not with a club the heart is broken
- Nor with a stone;
- A whip so small you could not see it
- I 've known
- To lash the magic creature
- Till it fell,
- Yet that whip's name
- Too noble then to tell.
- Magnanimous as bird
- By boy descried,
- Singing unto the stone
- Of which it died;
- Shame need not crouch
- In such an earth as ours--
- Stand--stand erect;
- The universe is yours.
- My friend must be a bird,
- Because it flies!
- Mortal my friend must be,
- Because it dies!
- Barbs has it, like a bee.
- Ah, curious friend,
- Thou puzzlest me!
- He touched me, so I live to know
- That such a day, permitted so,
- I groped upon his breast.
- It was a boundless place to me,
- And silenced, as the awful sea
- Puts minor streams to rest.
- And now, I 'm different from before,
- As if I breathed superior air,
- Or brushed a royal gown;
- My fee, too, that had wandered so,
- My gypsy face transfigured now
- To tenderer renown.
- Let me not mar that perfect dream
- By an auroral stain,
- But so adjust my daily night
- That it will come again.
- I live with him, I see his face;
- I go no more away
- For visitor, or sundown;
- Death's single privacy,
- The only one forestalling mine,
- And that by right that he
- Presents a claim invisible,
- No wedlock granted me.
- I live with him, I hear his voice,
- I stand alive to-day
- To witness to the certainty
- Of immortality
- Taught me by Time,--the lower way,
- Conviction every day,--
- That life like this is endless,
- Be judgment what it may.
- I envy seas whereon he rides,
- I envy spokes of wheels
- Of chariots that him convey,
- I envy speechless hills
- That gaze upon his journey;
- How easy all can see
- What is forbidden utterly
- As heaven, unto me!
- I envy nests of sparrows
- That dot his distant eaves,
- The wealthy fly upon his pane,
- The happy, happy leaves
- That just abroad his window
- Have summer's leave to be,
- The earrings of Pizarro
- Could not obtain for me.
- I envy light that wakes him,
- And bells that boldly ring
- To tell him it is noon abroad,--
- Myself his noon could bring,
- Yet interdict my blossom
- And abrogate my bee,
- Lest noon in everlasting night
- Drop Gabriel and me.
- A solemn thing it was, I said,
- A woman white to be,
- And wear, if God should count me fit,
- Her hallowed mystery.
- A timid thing to drop a life
- Into the purple well,
- Too plummetless that it come back
- Eternity until.
Dickinson, Emily. 1896. Poems.