Hold on to your breeches, Leo; a once-in-a-decade alignment sees Mercury and Pluto playing naked Twister all over the firmament's rug till the 20th.

That's right, time to dig up some veg from the Allotment of Love, and look whose courgette came up a treat! A warning though: control is vital because, despite your lust-luck, strong drink will figure, so keep a bucket under the bed and spare trousers handy.

A tip: if you're out of Haagen-Dasz or ice-cubes, Alpen and lard are not really adequate alternatives.

Oh, and don't keep wiping your nose on your sleeve like that if you ever want promotion again.

Your lucky toffee is treacle.