§ Children's Joke Page §

Polly, I think my teacher loves me.

Why's that?

She keeps putting "X"s next to my work!

Emma Bowen (New)

My horse is very polite. Whenever we come to a jump he stops and lets me go first!

Emma Bowen

What is the difference between a jeweler and a jailor?
A jeweler sells watches whereas a jailor watches cells!

Emma Bowen

Why do witches use brooms for flying?
Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!

Emma Bowen

Why did the man with only one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop!

Alice Bowen

Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens weren't invented then.

Emma Bowen

Why didn't the clock work?
Because it needed a hand.

Emma Bowen

Once there were three men, one Irishman, one Englishman and one Welshman, and they went to the desert. The Irishman took a bottle of wine, the Welshman took an umbrella and the Englishman took a car door. There was this man who said he would give them a camel if they told him why they were taking the things they were carrying. The Irishman said, `In case I get thirsty,' the Welshman said, `in case it rains,' and the Englishman said `because if it gets hot I can wind down the window.'

Luke Williamson, via Emma and Alice Bowen

Once there were three men, an Irishman, an Englishman and a Welshman, and they all climbed up to the top of a cliff. At the top they met a man, and the man said `if you can take your watch and drop it down the cliff, catch it again and bring it back up I will give you £500.' The Welshman thought he could do it, so he dropped his watch and ran all the way down to the bottom of the cliff, and he came back up with his watch in pieces. The Irishman thought he could do it as well, so he dropped his watch and jumped down the cliff and came back with his watch intact, but he was on a stretcher. The Englishman thought he could do it as well, so he dropped his watch and walked slowly down the cliff, and he came back up with his watch working. The man said, `how did you do that?' `I set my watch back two hours,' said the Englishman.

Luke Williamson, via Emma Bowen


Question: Why did the jelly bean go to school?
Answer: Because he wanted to be a smarty.

Sophie Kaschella, Sidney, Australia, 28 December 1995

Emma and Alice Bowen

See more kid's jokes. (New)

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