$Unique_ID{PAR00232} $Pretitle{} $Title{2 1/2 Years to 5 Years: Selecting Toys and Equipment} $Subtitle{} $Author{ Editors of Consumer Guide Mendelson, Robert A Mendelson, Lottie M Meyerhoff, Michael K Ames, Louise Bates} $Subject{2 1/2 Years to 5 Years Toys Equipment playthings outdoor gym sandbox wading pool pools car trips trip real sports toy gun creative artistic art supplies nontoxic mouth puppet puppets pop-up books book puzzles machines marble run mousetrap Etch-A-Sketch spin-art blocks imagination play sets camera cameras record player players real pictures records board games dominoes cards storage storing bed bunk beds MONEY-SAVING Buying TIPS SEXISM gender peer peers preschooler preschoolers} $Log{ Your preschooler is old enough to have preferences regarding playthings*0050201.tif Preschoolers love to play with blocks, and may require a variety of shapes*0050301.tif There are no "typical" patterns for puzzle play*0051001.tif Your preschooler won't mind doing the same puzzle over and over again*0051101.tif Adding to the number of blocks may be the only "upgrading" needed*0051201.tif There is a limitless number of art supplies to keep preschoolers busy*0051301.tif An outdoor gym set is appropriate and appealing to children above age two*0052901.tif Selecting playthings is a collaborative effort during the preschool years*0057101.tif Let your preschooler stick with her own choices on what toys she enjoys*0053501.tif With large blocks, "upgrading" involves adding to the number of pieces*0053601.tif} The New Parents' Question & Answer Book 2 1/2 Years to 5 Years: Selecting Toys and Equipment Isn't my preschooler old enough at this point to select his own playthings? Your preschooler certainly is now old enough to have distinct preferences regarding playthings and to communicate those preferences to you clearly and effectively. Unlike an infant or toddler, he is likely to see something at a friend's house or on television and say "I want one of those." He is even likely to be more than willing to help prepare a list for his birthday or for holidays. However, his powers of perception and communication are still far greater than his capacities for sound judgment and restraint. He may know what he wants, but he may not always know what is best for him or what fits into the family finances. Therefore, while choosing toys for your child is no longer a task you must do by yourself, it also is not yet a task that your preschooler can be trusted to do by himself. For the next few years, this will be a "collaborative" effort involving your child making requests and you exercising a fair measure of guidance and control. Is a large outdoor gym set a good investment for my preschooler at this point? This depends upon the state of your family finances. An item of this sort surely would be appropriate and appealing at this point, but it certainly should not be considered a necessity--especially if your preschooler has access to good equipment at the local park or at his nursery school. If you do decide to invest in an outdoor gym set, make sure it is safe and sturdy. If possible, obtain one that offers a variety of activities--swinging, ladder climbing, tunnel crawling, and see-sawing. Durability also is a consideration, as you will want a relatively expensive item such as this to last several years. The models made of high-quality wood are generally more costly than their metal counterparts, but they don't rust and generally tend to hold up better over the long haul. Won't my preschooler now be bored with a simple sandbox or wading pool? Probably not. Although these pieces of equipment will remain basically the same, your preschooler's interest and abilities will change dramatically over the course of this period. Most noticeably, his play will now start to include peers to a great extent, and this will add a whole new dimension to sand and water activities. Also, as his imagination becomes more active, he probably will be able to keep himself entertained for long periods of time taking jungle-river journeys, building elaborate castles, etc. Consequently, it is not likely that you will have to replace these items at this point. You may, however, want to consider adding new accessories on occasion to help facilitate your preschooler's growing inclination to play with his friends and his fantasies. What can I do to keep my preschooler entertained during long trips in the car? There are a number of basic items that are especially suitable for these circumstances. Small snap-together blocks are particularly appropriate for car trips in that they allow your preschooler to build rather elaborate structures yet they will hold their place and shape going over bumps and around turns. Crayons and paper will provide long periods of enjoyment. You might want to consider a coloring book as well, in case your preschooler's fatigue begins to interfere with his free-form creativity after a while. Many coloring books come with a section containing simple connect-the-dots puzzles, which your preschooler probably will find quite appealing, especially toward the end of this period. Keep in mind, however, that toys are likely to be your preschooler's secondary source of entertainment. Now that his mental and communication capacities are so advanced, his primary interest probably will be in talking to you about the trip itself and/or in playing games like "find an out-of-state license plate" or "count the yellow cars." My preschooler is a real little athlete, and I don't think he'll be satisfied with sponge and waffle bats and balls for long. When can I let him use real sports equipment? Keep in mind that the greatest motivator for your preschooler will be success. Therefore, it is important that you keep his play equipment well matched not only to his interests, but to his abilities as well. If your preschooler exhibits a desire to move beyond sponge and waffle bats and balls, for example, the next step does not have to be "the real thing" necessarily. If you provide him with a regulation bat and ball, it is very possible that he will experience a fair amount of frustration, thereby placing his original enthusiasm in jeopardy. Fortunately, when it comes to sports equipment, there are many intermediate alternatives available. Therefore, it might be a good idea to move your preschooler up gradually from "pretend" to "junior" and eventually to "real" so that his enthusiasm has a good chance to grow with his abilities. As soon as you feel your preschooler is ready to handle them, there's no harm in introducing him to various pieces of real sports equipment--as long as you introduce him to the rules of safety that go along with them beforehand. For instance, before you allow your preschooler to use a real bat, see to it that he has learned to make sure no one is standing nearby when he swings it. If you allow him to use a hard ball, see to it that he has learned to wear a batting helmet whenever he stands at the plate. By the way, with any play involving balls, it is important to constantly remind your preschooler not to chase a ball into the street or attempt to recover it from a hazardous area. Let him know that playing "real" sports has its rewards, but it also comes with responsibilities. Philosophically, I don't object to my preschooler playing with a toy gun, but I've heard that they present a lot of safety problems. Is this true? It certainly is if the toy gun shoots a projectile of any sort. Many such items fire rubber-tipped darts, which can be extremely dangerous if the tips fall off or are pulled off. Even with the tip secured, these darts can cause serious damage if aimed at certain parts of the body, such as the eyes. The same is true for guns that shoot seemingly safe objects such as table-tennis balls. In general, it is probably not a good idea to provide your preschooler with a gun that shoots anything, except, perhaps, water. Maybe late in this period you might consider introducing some more complex items, but be sure to teach your preschooler that these are special toys with special rules, and that he is never to aim them at anything other than inanimate targets. My preschooler says he loves the elaborate battery-operated toys he sees in the store. Is the play value of these items worth the price? Probably not. Although such items will thoroughly entrance your preschooler for a short period of time, it is doubtful that they will be able to sustain his interest for very long. Many parents have given in to the impassioned pleas of their preschooler to purchase one of these expensive items, only to watch it collect dust after it is brought home. Keep in mind that the play value of any toy increases with the number of things that your preschooler can do with it, not with the number of things it does all by itself. A battery-operated robot, for example, may do a lot of impressive things, but once it has run through its repertoire, that's it. On the other hand, something as simple as a small rubber ball can be a baseball, a basketball, and a bowling ball as well as a cannon ball and a wrecking ball. What's more, in combination with other simple items, that small rubber ball can be someone's head, a hood ornament for a car, a Christmas-tree ornament, and a limitless number of other things. My preschooler is very creative. What can I give him to bring out his artistic talent? There is an almost limitless number of "art" supplies appropriate for preschoolers, and your preschooler's use of these materials is likely to be limitless as well. Watercolor paints, finger paints, crayons or markers, simple and safe scissors, paper, nontoxic glue, and modeling clay or play dough all will be suitable and appealing to a certain extent. It will be up to you to determine where your preschooler's particular preferences lie in this regard. For example, some preschoolers are very visual in their creative activities, and they appreciate a wide variety of paints and crayons. Others are very tactile, and they appreciate greater variety in the color and texture of their clay. Keep in mind that your preschooler's likes and dislikes may not remain constant, so as you feed into one avenue of expression, don't forget to make other avenues available as well from time to time. My preschooler plays with a wide variety of materials, especially arts-and-crafts supplies. Do I still have to be concerned about him putting everything into his mouth? During this period, your preschooler will pretty much stop using his mouth as an exploratory organ, and he will become increasingly less likely to put anything and everything into his mouth. However, from time to time, he may absent-mindedly suck on the end of a paintbrush or a part of some other toy. In addition, like a lot of preschoolers, he may be curious about certain foodlike substances, especially crayons and paste, and will want "to see what they taste like." Consequently, while his playthings no longer represent the choking hazard they did during infancy and toddlerhood, your preschooler still may be at risk when it comes to ingesting poisonous substances. Therefore, make sure whatever materials he is using are nontoxic, just in case they end up in his mouth. After seeing a professional puppet show, my preschooler asked me to buy him puppets. Is it possible to make suitable ones instead? It certainly is. Even by the end of this period, sophisticated puppets like marionettes will be beyond the abilities of your preschooler. Simple hand puppets, however, will be appropriate and greatly appreciated. You can start out with something as easy as painting a face on an old mitten. You then might move on to an old glove with different faces painted on the tip of each finger. Eventually, you may consider taking a small paper bag, filling it with rags or newspaper, painting a face on it, and then fastening it to an ice-cream stick or small dowel rod. Armed with a few such items, and having a large cardboard carton or even just a table with a sheet over it for a drape, your preschooler will have a sufficient cast and an adequate theater for his own puppet-show productions. Will these new "pop-up" books be more appealing to my preschooler than the standard picture and story books? They probably will have a certain amount of appeal as novelties, but in the long run, it is doubtful that your preschooler will get a significant degree of additional enjoyment from these items. His imagination is pretty powerful at this point, so seeing something presented in three dimensions certainly isn't necessary and may actually be a distraction on occasion. It also should be noted that this feature generally adds to the cost of a book and usually decreases the book's durability, resulting in a substantial decrease in investment value. Therefore, rather than relying on a gimmick to capture your preschooler's attention, it is likely to be considerably more sensible to simply make sure that you choose books on specific subjects that hold a particular fascination for him. What level of complexity will my preschooler be able to handle with regard to puzzles? Throughout this period, preschoolers vary a great deal with regard to their desire to play with puzzles, their ability to concentrate on this type of task, and their tolerance for frustration. In other words, there are no "typical" patterns for puzzle play, so it will be necessary for you to observe your preschooler carefully and determine precisely what his needs and desires are. It is a good idea to start off this period with puzzles that contain only about five pieces. Once your preschooler has successfully mastered that level, you can try introducing more complex puzzles gradually as his interests dictate. You probably should avoid purchasing more than one or two puzzles of similar complexity, however; your preschooler won't mind doing the same puzzle over and over again, and his abilities in this area may advance rapidly. When he is ready for a new one, it probably should contain at least two or three pieces more than the previous puzzle. Are there any toys I can provide for my preschooler to encourage his interest in how machines work? Fortunately, there are some toys that are very appropriate for this purpose, and they are extremely appealing to most preschoolers. Generically, they are referred to as "marble run" or "mousetrap" toys. They consist of interlocking poles and ramps that can be put together to form an elaborate track for rolling marbles. The more sophisticated versions include levers, wheels, and other such devices as well. It may not be until the end of this period that your preschooler will be able to assemble more than the simplest version. However, once he has mastered this sort of device, he is likely to get many hours of enjoyment out of constructing a custom-made "machine" and watching how it "works" as the marble proceeds along its path and triggers the various mechanisms. By the way, marbles can constitute a choking hazard, so make sure your preschooler can be trusted not to put them in his mouth before you leave him alone with a toy of this sort. Will my preschooler enjoy mechanical creative toys like an "Etch-A-Sketch" or a spin-art machine? As he moves through this period, such toys will become increasingly appropriate and appealing for your preschooler. The important thing to remember is that your preschooler will get the most out of such items only when he is capable of using them without a lot of help from you. It may not be until the middle of this period that he becomes adept at manipulating the knobs of an Etch-a-Sketch accurately, and it may not be until the very end of the period that he can master a simple spin-art machine all by himself. Prior to these points, your preschooler may get several minutes of entertainment out of watching you use such items, but it will be later on that he really gets hours of enjoyment from being "creative" with them himself. My preschooler loves to play with blocks. Should I be "upgrading" these materials as he gets older? When it comes to large blocks, the only "upgrading" that may be necessary will involve adding to the number of pieces available to your preschooler, since his forts, roads, corrals, garages, and the like will probably become larger. Providing him with suitable alternative materials, such as shoe boxes, plastic tubs, wrapped rolls of paper towels or toilet paper, and toilet-paper tubes, also will be a good idea. On the other hand, you may want to consider "upgrading" both the number and the complexity of his small blocks as he attempts to create more realistic structures. When building a house for his dolls or a garage for his cars, for example, your preschooler may now require--or at least desire--a greater variety of shapes to work with. However, it is important to remember that "upgrading" in this regard should involve increasing rather than decreasing your preschooler's opportunities to use his imaginative and creative skills. In other words, adding pieces that enable him to build a chimney is far preferable to adding a single piece that already is a chimney. My preschooler has a very active imagination. Will I go broke trying to supply adequate materials for his "pretend" activities? The bulk of the raw materials that your preschooler will use in his pretend activities consist of "experiences" rather than "things." The depth and detail of his role-play and fantasy games come from what he has been exposed to previously, not from what is presently in front of him. Therefore, you will find that it is very easy and inexpensive to keep up with your preschooler in this regard. By supplying him with one simple red towel, you may very well give him everything he needs to play Superman, bullfighter, Betsy Ross, fashion model, Arab chieftain, and several other roles. With one simple toy truck, he may have everything he needs to take a trip to Grandma's house, build a city, go on a hayride, and partake in any number of fantasies. Of course, as he gets older, your preschooler may desire--and may even require--more "realism" in certain items. Still, you will be surprised at how resourceful he can be and how satisfied he will be using primarily the products of his own mind. Whenever I do something around the house, my preschooler wants to do it too. Should I let him use "real" things or restrict him to special "play" sets? Through the course of this period, your preschooler probably will become increasingly disenchanted with "play" sets. There will be times when he will be satisfied with them. However, when his goal is to participate in some activity with you, he will want to feel that he is really doing something. Of course, considerations of both safety and practicality enter into any decision regarding how often you will be able to allow your preschooler to use "real" equipment. However, it is nice to know that it won't take much to satisfy your preschooler at this point. For instance, in setting the table, he probably will be happy to do the napkins while you do the forks, knives, and glassware. In repairing the garage door, he probably will be content to rub a piece of sandpaper back and forth while you do the drilling (be sure he is a safe distance away and cannot reach any dangerous equipment). And, when taking a trip in the car, he probably will be thrilled to hold the map while you do the driving. As soon as we return from the doctor's office, zoo, or supermarket, my preschooler wants to set up the same thing at home. Will he really be satisfied with just a few pieces of relevant equipment? He certainly will. Moreover, those pieces of relevant equipment do not necessarily have to come from special sets. For example, a turkey baster will make a perfectly acceptable hypodermic needle, a laundry basket turned upside down will serve very well as a cage, and an old calculator will be a more than adequate cash register. The only really "special" thing your preschooler may require to a certain extent is you. If you can take a little time to participate in his role-play and fantasy games as a client, animal, customer, colleague, or whatever, and especially if you provide suggestions and elaborations along the way, your preschooler's activities will be that much richer and more enjoyable for him--and probably just as fascinating and fun for you. Lately, my preschooler has become frustrated with his toy camera and record player, but I'm not ready to let him use mine. How do I manage a compromise? Fortunately, there now are a number of "starter" cameras and record players on the market. These items are simple to use, safe, durable, and take "real" pictures or play "real" records. Of course, the quality of their performance is nowhere near what you expect from your own equipment, but the price is considerably lower. Since it is the fact that they are "real" that is of primary importance to your preschooler, he probably won't mind the below-par quality of the picture or sound. Keep in mind, however, that these junior versions won't satisfy your preschooler forever, especially if he really gets "hooked" on photography, music, or whatever. Therefore, particularly toward the end of this period, as his interests and abilities warrant, you might consider relaxing some of your strict prohibitions against his using your equipment. Give him a chance to at least "get the feel" of using some more sophisticated items under your supervision. Is my preschooler still too young for board games? Board games require that a preschooler have a certain level of both intellectual and social skills, so it may not be until the middle or end of this period that your preschooler is really ready. Keep in mind that he not only will need the capacity to master the rules and moves involved, he also will need the capacity to wait his turn and accept losing as well as winning. The ability to lose graciously may be the last to kick in--some preschoolers often try to change the rules or otherwise "cheat" or even quit playing rather than acknowledge defeat. In the beginning, it's best to stick with very simple games that are based on shape recognition or color matching instead of reading. Once your preschooler is able to recognize basic numbers regularly, you might consider introducing him to dominoes or even to a deck of cards--many five olds can master and enjoy a game of "Go Fish" or "War." I keep all of my preschoolers toys in a large chest in his room, but he sometimes has trouble finding and getting things out on his own. Is there a better storage system? You have several options available. First, you might consider storing your preschooler's toys in a few different areas around the house. Since he will not play with everything in the same place, there's no need for everything to be in one location. Having small storage areas strategically located in various rooms will make his toys more accessible--and may enable him to be more enthusiastic and effective at clean-up time. In addition, it is a good idea to store toys on shelves as opposed to inside large containers. This eliminates your preschooler's need to struggle with a lot of items he doesn't want in order to get the one he does want--a process which often results in "dumping" the whole thing out. Since your preschooler probably won't have a lot of clothes that need to be hung at this point, you might consider building a few extra shelves into his closet to accommodate his toy needs. To the extent that containers are necessary, small ones--such as milk crates--are ideal. Finally, as your preschooler's toys become more complex and contain many pieces, it helps to hang a shoe bag so the pouches can be used to organize and hold things that otherwise would be difficult to keep track of and retrieve. I'm buying a bed for my preschooler, and I thought a bunk bed would be fun and sensible in the long run. Are they safe? If you're planning on having more than one child, or even if you expect your preschooler to have friends sleep over regularly, a bunk bed may be a good idea in that it will save valuable floor space. Besides, most children like bunk beds. Of course, your preschooler's first bed should be easy for him to climb into and out of. If you confine him to the bottom at first, a bunk bed need not be an immediate problem in this regard. Unfortunately, bunk beds are inherently hazardous to a certain extent, so if you do purchase one, make sure that the top portion has a sturdy safety rail. Make sure your preschooler understands that the top bed is for sleeping and not for playing upon. If possible and practical, you might consider getting a bunk bed with a detachable ladder rather than a built-in one. That way, you can remove it during play time and install it only when it's time for sleep. MONEY-SAVING TIPS Buying toys for preschoolers, although easier than doing so for infants and toddlers, is still a hit-or-miss proposition to a certain extent. Even with your preschooler communicating his preferences and you providing sound judgment and appropriate guidance, it is very possible that a given item simply will not turn out to be the long-term success that everyone expected it to be. Of course, your percentage of "hits" will be getting better as your child gets older. Unfortunately, the cost of your "misses" will be increasing as well. Toy libraries, therefore, are still a good resource, but many are not willing to handle the considerably more expensive and complex items that preschoolers desire and require. As an alternative, you might consider becoming a regular visitor--and perhaps vendor--at garage sales, flea markets, etc. Because the interests and abilities of preschoolers are so varied, one child's "too boring" or "too frustrating" toy may be another child's "favorite" plaything. Rather than having a lot of families possessing a lot of toys that are getting very little or no play time, these outlets allow the "misses" to be put back into circulation. There, they may very well become "hits" that cost relatively little money and enable the original purchaser to recoup at least some of the original investment. If you do take this strongly recommended route, just remember to be extra careful about checking for safety considerations. Federal regulations do not apply to resales. If an item has been repaired or repainted, there is no guarantee that it will be as durable or that the paint used was nontoxic, so investigate and choose wisely. SEXISM IN TOYLAND As noted earlier, gender differences in play preferences tend to start showing up during toddlerhood. Now, during the preschool period, they are likely to become rather pronounced. To a certain extent, your reactions to your preschooler's choices will remain a primary factor in this regard. However, at this point, you should be aware that your preschooler will be subject to a number of additional influences. Toy manufacturers often are lax when it comes to depicting both boys and girls on boxes containing certain toys, and their advertising agents sometimes are even more lax about this when it comes to making commercials. Consequently, even though your preschooler may be "turned on" by a particular type of toy, he may be "turned off" to it when he sees only children of the opposite sex playing with it on the box or commercial. Furthermore, while you may be very careful about your own remarks about proper sex roles, your preschooler may receive negative feedback about his toy selections from his peers. His need to "conform to the group" won't be nearly as strong as it will be during adolescence, but "boyness" and "girlness" are among the very few ways in which young children can establish identity easily. Therefore, being "proper" in his choice of playthings, according to the standards set by his playmates, may be quite important to your preschooler. In any event, it probably is wise to avoid making a fuss over the whole thing at this time. In another year or two, your child will have had more experience and will be less hung up on some of the issues involved. You, in turn, will have better success in convincing him to stick with his own choices regardless of what he sees or hears from outside sources.