Just call me Rudolph - my nose is so red. My throat
feels like something's bungy jumping from my tonsils
and my eyes and nose are on a permanent flush. I've
got the flu and I'm off work sick. I hate being off
work sick, I always feel so guilty, like I need a note
from mother to explain my absence rather than a
sicknote from the doctor. "Please excuse our Glenda
from work today. She isn't feeling very well and wonÆt
be coming back until she's good and ready and had
plenty of fresh air and orange juice". Yes, that would
take the guilt away alright! It's so unusual for me to
be at home during the day that I didn't even realise
the joys of daytime TV until now. Did you know, for
instance, that you can enter your pet on a game show,
dash around a supermarket, fall in love with a hunky
soap star, learn how to rise a cheese souffle, re-point
your chimney, and give new life to an old outfit by
taking off the sleeves and stitching on some sequins..
and all before 11am. I got to meet my postman today
for the first time and the window cleaner, the dustbin
man, a double glazing sales rep and a dodgy bloke that
came around selling cheap booze from a van that had its
number plates removed. So, I lay on the sofa for a
while trying to sleep, stinking of vapour rub in an old
gray sweatsuit and I was wondering why no-one came to
visit me. "Oh you're off work today? Oh great? What?
You've got the flu? No, I can't today, I won't have time to pop
over and see you, hope you feel better soon though".
So, I start getting bored and then I try to do things
around the house only to find I don't have the energy
to finish anything I start and my boyfriend comes home
to find me fast asleep on the sofa with a Paint by
Numbers on the floor with all of the number 3's
coloured in and very little else. Having flu is the
pits and the worst thing is, there really isn't much
you can do about it at all. You simply have to wait for
it to wreak havoc with your system and let it run its
course. Except it doesn'Æt run, it goes at turtle speed
through your body and into your head, fogging
everything up and making you envy those flu-free people
around you. It'll pass though, I know it'll go away in
a few days and I'll soon be back at work, which is just
as well, I don't know how much more daytime TV I can
take.
Glenda Young is also the authoress of the
weekly Coronation
Street Update on the net, and can be contacted at:
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