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Dating Safety Tips

Match.Com provides a fun and safe environment to meet and socialize with members online. It also provides a great place to build loving and trusting friendships that can lead to long lasting real life relationships. Whether you decide to correspond with members online or meet members offline please use sound judgment and be responsible for your conduct online and off. In both the virtual and real worlds, common sense is your best dating safety tool.

Online Safety Tips

Face to Face Dating Safety Tips

Online Safety
Dishonesty Trust your instincts, they will seldom fail you. Watch for passive language, frequent use of certain words (would, could, should and might) and statements that are written as questions. These can all indicate a lack of commitment. Pay attention to choppy sentences and stories where all extraneous detail has been edited out. Lies are often well rehearsed, so the writer only includes the essential information. Take a relatively conservative approach to this issue. If you think someone is lying, act as thoug h they are. Move on to someone you trust.
Guard Your Anonymity Never include your last name, real email address, home address, phone number, place of work, or any other identifying information in your profile or initial emails. Stop communicating with anyone who pressures you for this information or attempts in any way to trick you into revealing it. Take all the time you need to become comfortable with someone. Ask questions and make sure you are satisfied with the answers. Trust your instincts, move cautiously and be selective.
You Are Never Obligated To Meet Someone The beauty of getting to know someone online is that you can gradually collect information and then make a choice about pursuing the relationship in the real world. You are never obligated to meet anyone, regardless of your level of online intimacy. And even if you do decide to arrange a meeting, you always have the right to change your mind. It's possible that your decision to keep the relationship at the anonymous level is based on a hunch that you can't logically explain. This is entirely appropriate and must be respected. Never meet someone who argues against your instincts, finds logical flaws with your feelings or pressures you in any way.
Report Questionable Behavior to Match.Com Match.Com is dedicated to providing you with a comfortable and friendly environment for meeting new friends and potential romantic partners. Your experiences, positive or negative, are important to us. We encourage you to immediately report any questionable or inappropriate behavior. Send an email to feedback@match.com and include specific details so we can respond appropriately.
Your First Date
First Date Safety Overview You can never be absolutely positive about someone's background, motives or future behavior. With that in mind, if you are going to err, it must be on the side of caution. Never agree to meet someone if you feel at all unsure or afraid. Pay attention to your suspicious instincts, even if the facts don't seem to merit the concern. When you do decide to meet someone, proceed very carefully. Always make sure that a friend or family member knows about your date, and arrange to check in with them when you arrive home.
Select The Safest Possible Environment Meet in a public place at a time when many people are present. A familiar restaurant or coffee shop is fine, but not at midnight. Never meet at one of your homes or places of employment. Avoid hikes, bike rides, or drives in remote areas for the first few dates. If you decide to move to another location, take your own car. Make sure you end the date while there are still other people present.
When Traveling From Another Location If you are flying in from another area, arrange for your own car and a hotel room. Do not disclose the name of your hotel and never allow your date to make the arrangements for you. Rent a car at the airport and drive directly to your hotel. Call your date from the hotel or meet at the location you have already agreed to. If the location seems inappropriate or unsafe, go back to your hotel. Try to contact your date at that location, or leave a message on a home machine. When traveling from another location, always make sure that a friend or family member knows of your plans and has contact information.
Go Easy On The First Meeting Don't plan an entire day together. Meet for one activity and keep it at an hour or two. Stay away from any intense issues or conversations. Don't interrogate your date, but do use this time as an opportunity to learn a bit more. Have fun and keep things light, but pay attention. When the timing is appropriate, thank your date for getting together and say good-bye. You may be asked about getting together again. Answer honestly. It's OK to decline an additional date.
Watch For Red Flags Be aware that unhealthy or dangerous people often hide behind exemplary behavior. Your date's behavior is unpredictable and there are never guarantees, but there are some warning signs. Pay attention to any displays of anger, intense frustration or attempts at pressuring or controlling you. Acting in a passive-aggressive manner, making demeaning or disrespectful comments or any physically inappropriate behavior are all red flags.
Getting Out Of A Jam Never do anything you feel unsure about. If you are in any way afraid of your date, use your best judgment to diffuse the situation and get out of there. Excuse yourself long enough to call a friend for advice, ask someone else on the scene for help, or slip out the back door and drive away. If you have to, call the police. It's always better to be safe than sorry. Never worry or feel embarrassed about your behavior. Your safety is much more important than one person's opinion of you.

Trish McDermott

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