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By Angela Gardner

I can hardly believe it, girls. Here it is, turkey time again. Soon, oh so soon, the parade of big holiday meals will begin... and soon after that we'll all be bigger than floats in a parade. Then, we'll start shopping for all the after holiday bargains and dieting to get into them. Ah, the symmetry of the cycle of life... ain't it grand?

Another grand thing is the way new technology is changing our world. Just recently New Jersey started using the Easy Pass system on the Atlantic City Expressway. This is a boon for the many gamblers who need to get to the casinos as quickly as possible so they can feed all their money into those other high tech marvels — the modern day slot machine. Now they no longer need to stop, or have any human contact from the time they leave their house until they're broke. Oops, I mean "big winners."

What's Easy Pass got to do with us TG types? Well, it should get a lot of more novice crossdressers down to the shore. I remember, just a few years back, having a nervous breakdown when I realized that I would have to stop to pay a toll while traveling in drag. I know one girl who used to actually turn away from the toll taker and hold the money out as far as possible when she paid. It was kind of like an offering to the gods, "Please don't destroy me oh mighty Toll Man." Like that attracted less attention than just handing over the cash in a matter of fact manner. Anyhow, with electronic toll collecting the nervous crossdresser doesn't have to worry about human interaction while heading down to Atlantic City for a night of gambling or to catch an appearance by Englebert. Of course Easy Pass can't do anything for you once you get to the shore. If your skirt is short enough maybe you'll find a high roller to make an easy pass at you, but you're on your own... The Diva can't recommend any high tech help for that situation.

Here's Looking at You, Kid

Another high tech thing you may run into in New Jersey is a surveillance camera. Now they're always a good idea around your property, to make sure no crooks can sneak up on you, and they have been useful to America's Most Wanted when a grainy black and white shot of a perpetrator robbing a convenience store is needed, but the cameras I'm talking about are placed where no transvestite would really want to find one. It seems that in New Jersey there is no law against having a hidden camera in the dressing room of a store. So, if you have been trying on things in New Jersey stores I hope you have gone the extra mile and shaved that hard to reach spot in the middle of your back. "Hey Harry, would ya look at this patch a fur on dis broad? That's pretty gross, ain't it?"

Oh no, I just remembered that I tried on lingerie in Macy's a couple of weeks ago... and the store was in New Jersey. Oh well, at least I am a professional entertainer. If anyone got any fun out of me slipping into that bustier they had better call my agent and pay my fee.

But, never fear girls. A senator in the Garden State is working to get a bill passed to either stop the practice all together, or at least follow in the footsteps of Pennsylvania and require the stores to post a sign saying you may be starring in a video if you go into the dressing room.

There is another solution to this problem. We have to get all those people who feel stopping at the sales desk is just too time consuming to STOP STEALING! The clothes aren't free ya know. Every bit of "shrinkage" gets figured into the retail price which means we're paying the freight for the girl in the hot, I mean really hot, dress. Why can't we all just be honest? Oh, did I mention I have some wigs that "fell off a truck?" My cousin Vinnie gets 'em for me. They're all brand new. Give me a call if ya want one doll. Cheap. I'm making nothing on the deal.

Web Search Results Are In

For a bit of fun I decided to do an Internet search on the term "cross-dresser." I always spell it as one word, crossdresser, but the rest of the world is not as advanced as The Diva and continue to hyphenate. With that in mind I typed the term into my browser and hit the "Go" button. Within seconds the search engine had traversed the entire WWW (I am cruising the net at 56K) and returned many pages of information on files containing the term "cross-dresser." Most of the URLs also mentioned sex of one kind or another and many used the word "anal." Mixed in among the commercial sex sites for she-males there were a few real web resources for crossdressers. There were a few support groups, and then there was a high school kid's home page. It got included cause its text included "cross-dressers."

I clicked on the link and found a picture of a high school choir from St. Cloud, Minnesota in the middle of a performance. "Cross-dressers" had appeared in the text of this lad's page because he was describing the picture. His brother is performing with the choir and he, as well as a couple of other boys, are crossdressed. (His brother was kind of cute. He wore a long dress with an empire waist, and his wig was nicer than that worn by the other crossdressed singers.) Now, in this day of crossdressing kids being tossed out of high school (like that little sweetie Alex McClendon from down in Georgia) it's refreshing to find a school in the American Heartland that seems to be perfectly allright with a few crossdressed singers in the choir. Then again, maybe the boys in dresses are really, really good sopranos. In any event, I find it encouraging... and intriguing. Perhaps The Diva will have to go undercover for an investigative report on school sanctioned teen crossdressing in Minnesota. Good morning class. I'm your substitute teacher, Miss Gardner. Now how many of you boys are shaving your legs?

Speaking of Young Alex...

CNN's website has a story about Alex that was brought to my attention by Miss Michelle Lynn. It, like the story in Time Magazine on the ninth of the month, covered how Alex has been attending a private school in Georgia as a female. She has been living as a female for the past two years and thought that she could get an education at the school. She got an education allright, in the subjects of fear and intolerance.

It wasn't her fellow students who were upset. After their initial reactions of, "Wow, ya mean the chick's a dude" they settled down and accepted her as another girl in the class. It was the parents who complained that Alex was negatively influencing their children which caused the board of trustees to ask her to leave. Many of her classmates, including many of the boys, donned hair bows in protest. Alex has decided that home schooling may be the best bet for her.

I think this kind of thing shows that the younger generation is often better able to accept gender difference. What kind of bad influence did the parents think Alex represented? Would their sons all decide to take a lot of home economics courses, want to wear a dress to the prom, and maybe develop a love of show tunes just because a classmate is transgendered? This type of fear from the parents is not based on fear of transgendered people, this is plain old homophobia. What if my son wants to date this girl who is really a boy? That's the question they ask themselves, and it's the same concern parents had back in the '60s when boys started to grow long hair. Because they had long hair like a girl, what if they attracted men sexually? Until this kind of thinking is adjusted by the application of real knowledge about human sexuality and gender expression we have little hope of making any advances for transgender rights. Hey, now there's a good reason why the TG rights and gay rights groups should work together. In the meantime, all we have is the fact that Alex's fellow students supported her. That, and maybe that choir from St. Cloud.

The "Official" Gender Identity Page

At the bottom of the CNN story on Alex they included three links to TG related sites. One was to a support group for CDs in Canada, one was to a Rabbi who has a good article on Crossdressing and Dueteronomy on his site and the other was a link to, "The Official Gender Identity Support Page." Now I'm always a little bit suspicious of anything on the web (and most anywhere else) that calls itself "official." To me that's like an official decoder ring. What if you have an unofficial ring that still translates the code? I just had to click on that link. It takes you to a church of some kind and their text, while it does include links to the Standards of Care for Transsexuals and some other useful stuff, also goes on about "alternative" treatment methods for gender dysphoria. Quick, everybody It's sites like this that are the most insidious. They contain information that makes sense and they profess love and caring for the poor victims of gender dysphoria... but they think they can "cure" you. They might as well try curing heterosexuality. It ain't gonna happen. And besides, who's a victim, anyway?

Wake Up Call to Activists

Recently community activists have been going on and on about an ad in a computer magazine that uses the old your-bride-is really-a-guy gag to sell their product. Some activists have put the company that ran the ad in the same category as Adolph Hitler and other hate mongers 'cause they dared to use a TS reference that was less than positive in their ad. Admittedly, the ad is not in the best interest of the TG community since it equates the bride's TS status with some kind of deception, but it's not quite as bad as genocide. A few letters and some nice informational pamphlets should take care of the ad men who came up with it, and the activists should save the really big guns for sites like the Official Gender Identity Support Page. It's sitting out there on the Net, ready to suck in transgendered people who are looking for real information, and maybe real support. I think I'm going to start an official movement to quash this kind of disinformation and... oh, right. Well maybe just an unofficial movement.

Show Biz Buzz: He's Really a She!

I don't know what to say, I just found out on the Entertainment Tonight show that ran on the 10th that, that lovely actress Karen Dior who's been on Veronica's Closet and Zena is really a man. Oh my, and to think I thought she was attractive. I must be... oh, I can't even go there.

But seriously, ET's Cover Story was about Karen Dior and Jazmun , two male actresses who have been doing quite well in Hollywood playing drag roles. Keep up the good work girls and thanks to ET for presenting them as role models. And again, as you can see, a little makeup and hair can work wonders.

In other entertainment news, this weeks episodes of Just Shoot Me had some gender role lessons. The network ran two episodes on Tuesday night. In the first one George Segal's character makes abet with Donald Trump concerning weight lose. The loser has to play a round of golf in a dress. Not full drag, just a frock. Of course Segal loses the bet by actually gaining weight and has to wear the dress. With the weight gain it was tough to find him a nice dress that fit, but he did and we're treated to some shots of him on the course in a floral print shirtwaist. He accessorized with golf shoes and a cigar. While it's played for laughs he tells his daughter that he felt great and played a great game of golf. The fact that he was in a dress made all his usual golf course worries seem less important and he got a better score. And, a nice man bought him a drink back at the club house.

In the second episode the three male leads are all watching a manly, but emotional movie on TV. After it's over they're all crying and trying to pass it off as allergy attacks when they suddenly just stop the male BS. They admit that they have emotions and that society is wrong to so sharply define how men can express their emotions. Then one of the guys says, "Yeah, sometimes I wish I was a woman." He is quickly left alone in the room and for the rest of the show the other two pick on him about being a girl. At the end of the show he is asking a model out to dinner and David Spade's character, Finch, tries to embarrass him in front of her by telling her that the guy hitting on her wants to be a woman. She finds that refreshing and consents to the dinner date. Two episodes with two good examples of how to educate about gender roles and still get a laugh.

Look for a couple of movies with TG stuff in the script. Coming in January is The Adventures of Sebastian Cole. Sebastian is a boy who is being raised by a pre-op TS dad, named Henrietta. Reviews indicate that while it's a comedy Henrietta is not treated in a negative manner. Keep your eyes on the movie listings for that one.

For FtMs there is a film coming about the life of Brandon Teena. It stars Hillary Swank, who played the female Karate Kid and has a following on television's 90210. I think you can see that Hillary is the right type to play Brandon. All she needs is a haircut. The film is titled Take It Like A Man and is loosely based on the Brandon Teena story. Filming just stared on this flick so it may not be out for a few months. If I learn more I'll let you know.

And with that, The Diva must bid you adieu for another month. Don't have too much of that holiday food and don't forget The Diva when you go holiday shopping. Just think size 10. Happy Thanksgiving!


The Diva is a busy woman who just can't read every page on the web and every newspaper. If you come across any juicy dish send it along to The Diva.
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