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Shopping 101

"Don't Be Blue On Black Friday"

By Jessica Brandon, B.S.
(Bachelorette of Spending)
Hello, darlings! How has Fall treated you so far? Since my column hits cyberspace in the first week of the month, allow me to wish each and every person reading these words a safe and happy Thanksgiving.

It's a wonderful time of year to be with family and to give blessings for health and hearth. Not to mention a full table at dinnertime! But don't overdo it on the turkey and trimmings! Wouldn't want you to lose that girlish figure you've worked so hard to obtain!

This month, I take a stab at a topical theme which ties in perfectly with Thanksgiving, or rather, what we all like to do on the day after----SHOP!!! As you all know, the day after Thanksgiving is traditionally known as "Black Friday", and it is, quite literally, THE busiest shopping day of the entire year. Oh, sure, people say the day after Christmas is big, but that's because more people are in the stores returning gifts they got and didn't like rather than looking for bargains.

Now, I have no idea when or where the tradition of Black Friday started, but it has become quite literally a godsend in the retail world as hordes of people from coast to coast descend on stores to take advantage of sales and bargains on anything and everything. And girls, if you're in the market for clothes, shoes, outerwear, lingerie, cosmetics, jewelry, you name it, Black Friday is the day to do it.

However, it wouldn't hurt to have a few tips handy to help make your experience a good one. To begin with, check the newspapers prior to the big day. Normally, the Thanksgiving editions will be Sunday morning thick with circulars and Black Friday sales being advertised by department stores and the like. Do some thorough research for sales on items you want, cut out the ads or make notes on stores you want to visit and items you want to buy. By having the necessary intelligence in hand before you hit the stores, it'll make your trip all the more enjoyable.

Next, if you're lucky enough to have Black Friday off, get an early start on your expedition. Part of the tradition is that stores open early on that day. How early, you ask? Try seven a.m. As the old saying goes, "First come, first served". If you want to catch a bargain on something you want before it's snatched up, make like the early bird so you can grab the worm of your choice. You're going to be in heated competition with thousands of other shoppers, so it helps to get the upper hand. As for shopping dressed on Black Friday, that's up to you. With the stores and malls packed solid, they'll be more people checking you out. If you're not totally comfortable shopping en femme, that could present a problem.

Remember my "Three A's" of shopping (especially Appearance) so you don't become a spectacle. Also, I've seen some shoppers get pretty testy, if not downright belligerent while in search of Black Friday sales, so keep your cool while all around you are losing theirs. Lastly, don't try to buy out the store at one time. When last I checked, human beings only come with one pair of arms, so don't overload them with bags and parcels. Buy only what you can safely carry without becoming a hazard to yourself or other shoppers. If need be, make several trips to you car which can hold a great deal more than you can. And don't go hog wild with your plastic, buy in moderation.

Trust me, you'll feel better about that when the bills arrive.

Shopping Online

Now, on to a more serious shopping topic. I spend at least a good hour or so every day checking out websites devoted to shopping in general and transgender shopping in particular, and I've noticed something I consider to be a disturbing trend that's developed lately.

It seems that some websites which cater to the TG community are single minded in their desire to sell mostly, if not only exotic clothing and accessories instead of more sedate and practical wear. You know what I'm talking about: leather outfits, tight dresses and short skirts, shoes with five, six, even seven inch heels, dominatrix boots, big hair wigs, PVC stuff, you name it. Then there are sites selling imitation vaginas and junk like so-called breast enhancement pills and creams. Hell, there's even one site that offers a book which tells how to buy almost any drug (such as hormones) from overseas sources legally without a prescription, something I find not only irresponsible but dangerous.

Perhaps I'm woefully out of touch since, from day one, I've never had any desire to wear overly provocative clothing. The closest I have to that is a black leather miniskirt, but I've never worn it in broad daylight. I for one find it hard to believe that the demand for such items in the TG world is high enough to the point where there are so many sites selling stuff you'd think would only be found in the pages of a Frederick's of Hollywood catalog, and even then, only worn after dark.

What I'm getting at here is that some of the stuff offered through these sites is simply not for normal day-to-day wear, which fits the pattern for those of us who want to present a believable female image while in public. Not every crossdresser wants to dress like a hooker, so why then do these sites appear to offer only that kind of clothing? Maybe I'm being a prude, but to me, that smacks of stereotyping crossdressers as fetishists, and that's just not fair. What's your view on this, girls? Do you think I'm right, or am I way off base and this is what the people want? Why don't you drop me a line and give me an earful.

As always, my electronic mailbox is open for your comments, tips and opinions at . Until next month, shop not just with your heart, but with your head!

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