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Finding Stephanie

By Stephanie K


Do YOU have a First Time Story? Email it to Cindy and we'll publish it!

I finally found Stephanie!! It was about 6:00 PM, Friday,May 16, 1997. I was looking in the mirror and I was seeing Stephanie for the very first time. Beautiful hair, tasteful Make-up, large dangle gold earrings, and a very smart black skirt suit with red trim and gold buttons. I really liked the person I saw in that mirror!! I had been so afraid that I would just see Steve in a dress!! But that wasn't the case and I was thrilled! I couldn't take my eyes away! My Tri-Ess Big Sister Sharon noticed my wonder and said quietly "That's really YOU in the mirror!" I was stunned! I loved the person I saw in the mirror. I loved her unconditionally!! At that very moment I experienced a very large dose of compassion and love for that person! I experienced a very large dose of love and compassion for myself!! Finally, I was experiencing something I had been yearning for all of my 49 years. I was finally allowing myself to love this part of me!! I felt wonderful!! I intend to always love her now and forever! She is a part of me!! Magical! Mystical! Real!

But I have to tell you, it was a hoot getting to that point! I met Sharon at the hotel about 11:00 AM after a two hour drive to the Twin Cities. I had never ever knowingly been in the presence of another CD who was dressed. It was a powerful and pleasant experience. Thirty minutes later we were en route to Don Murnane's Hairstyles to get my first "really nice hair." I met Patty and she had me sit in front of the mirror as we all surveyed the territory trying to decide what might look good on me!! I was surprisingly calm, but quite focused on getting a "look" that I really liked. "No, that one makes me look like the lead singer from REO Speedwagon!" "Ugh, that one makes me look like a WWF contender and I don't intend to go 3 rounds with Hulk Hogan!" "Hmmm, pretty, but I don't think I'm a blonde." Finally, I fell in love with the auburn shag that just touched my shoulders and framed my face with random curls! Ok, no make-up yet and my male attire below and I still wasn't sure I would find Stephanie! At least we all agreed that I looked NICE! (Though I felt a little nervous doing this, Sharon and Patty made the experience of getting my first wig very delightful! I know I will be going back there again!)

Now, back to the hotel. It's make-up time! On the way back, we stopped for gas at an SA and I watched Sharon touch up her lipstick, get out of the car, and proceed to pump her own gas and go into the store! I was intrigued. Yikes! Could I possibly do something like that as Stephanie!?!? I shivered as I thought about such an adventure! (Little did I know what the future had in store for me that very night!!) Back at the hotel, I spent several rather intense but very pleasant hours learning how to do my own make-up! Good teacher! Good learner! And everything came out better than I ever expected! Pretty, but not outrageous! Down right dignified! Love the red lips!! Now the clothes! Oh, my, the CLOTHES! Pretty black lingerie purchased especially for the occasion. My Big Sister graciously donating a pair of lovely breast forms! Pulling the long narrow skirt up over my hips! Gosh! Is this really happening to me? Is this really going to work?? By this time Joanne has arrived to give encouragement and I AM TREMBLING! Get the hair right! Slip on the shoes! Earrings! Perfume! FEELS GREAT! HOW DO I LOOK? Let's try putting on my glasses! Sharon says "Wow!" I step in front of the mirror! WOW, is right! HELLO, Stephanie!!! Magical! Mystical! Real!

I loved Stephanie right away! I was very happy! In fact, I was quite proud of the way I looked, so proud and happy that I knew I needed to have my picture taken. I was afraid that this apparition would disappear at any moment and so needed to be preserved immediately or she would be forever lost! Both Sharon and Joanne had digital cameras and I don't think I have ever had so many pictures taken of me in one weekend ever before! Sure was fun!!

So, I am so proud and happy with the lovely way I look, I can't just sit in the hotel room all evening, can I?? "Of course not!" say Sharon and Joanne, "So let's go!" I grab my purse and out the door we go! Oh, my, I am really walking down this hallway as Stephanie! Oh, my, I am really walking out the hotel door into the light of day as Stephanie! Oh, my, I am really getting my first lesson in getting into a car with a tight skirt on! Oh, my, sit first, keep your knees together and swing your feet in!! I MADE IT!!

Where to, girls? How about visiting Sofronia and Onnalee at their place to introduce Stephanie! "S-s-sure," I stutter. Three gals just cruising Minneapolis! What fun! Then, parking in front of the apartment house, let's see if I can get OUT of this car gracefully!! A completely different experience!! Stand up and straightens out that skirt! Made it again! Now, stroll up the walk! I don't THINK anybody is looking at me!! Into the vestibule, the door is locked and Sharon pushes the buzzer. I'm nervous, TRAPPED in this glass entryway! Oh, no, here comes a formidable looking fellow in green work clothes. Oh, my, it's the apartment manager and he is coming to read the riot act to these three lovely and equally formidable ladies, though one is VERY NERVOUS, milling around his entryway! He opens the door and says "Well, what do we have here??" I AM STARTING TO SWEAT!!! I don't believe it?! He welcomes us in!! I am then introduced to Sofronia Anne, president of Beta Gamma (Minneapolis Tri-Ess Chapter) as his male self! He greets me warmly and we spend the next half hour in his apartment chatting up a storm!! I am really liking this!!

Time to go and Sharon and Joanne are thinking about getting something to eat. I don't care, eating which has always been a passion for most of Steve's life, has somehow paled in the light of a newly discovered PASSION in Stephanie's *smile*!! But what the heck! Lead on, girls!! What 'll it be? Drive up window at Mc Donald's? Quick foray into Subway for a sandwich to eat back at the hotel? Snacks from SuperAmerica? Noooo, unbeknownst to me, Sharon has made reservations at the Dakota Bar and Grill in Bandana Square! Yikes! A very PUBLIC place! We have to sit down to dine and be there for a seemingly incredibly long time!!! Can I really do this? OK, as long as it's the three of us, let's do it!! Well, the room is dimly lit and we sit, order, eat, drink, and be merry! Sure, a few people are noticing us, but this is really fun! I feel so comfortable. Dessert, more pictures, collect my purse and off we go again! Sharon needs to visit the ladies room. Joanne and I drift out into the mall to wait. Joanne says she has to go too, will I be ok waiting out here by myself? I think so, I don't think I'll try the ladies room just yet!! But as she leaves I realize, "Yikes, I am standing here ALL ALONE as Stephanie!!" A few people walk by. I turn to read the entertainment calendar on the wall. Am I being noticed?? I reassure myself, "It's OK, Stephanie, you look great! Perhaps a little tall, but you look great! Take some deep breaths!" Sharon and Joanne pick me up and whisk me out to the car again! Now what?

Sharon says "Well, let's go someplace and get some stuff to bring back to the hotel for breakfast!" We drive to Bierly's in Eagan, open all night. Before we go in we all touch up our lipstick. Then into the VERY bright lights of the grocery store. Not many customers but a lot of workers stocking the shelves. More amused looks, but "Hey! I'm Stephanie and I like myself and I like string cheese, so I'm going to get some! Does this girl have the ATTITUDE or what!?"

But now it's about 1:00 AM. Hey, midnight has passed and I didn't turn back into a pumpkin!! Wow, this is really happening!! I don't want it to EVER end, but it's way past my bedtime and we make it back to the hotel. Thanks, Joanne! Thanks, Sharon, for a most amazing and exciting night! I say goodnight and stroll back to my room! Now the really hard part, taking off my beautiful clothes, wig, and make-up! SIGH!! But I am still Stephanie and I slip into my nightgown and dive under the covers! As I fall asleep I have a universe of wonderful memories of finding Stephanie! My last waking thoughts are filled with a deep appreciation for my Big Sister, Sharon! It's been Magical, Mystical, Real! Thank you, so much!


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