Edited by Lilly Crista
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As Fifty Gets Closer
I return to the music
that gave me the rhythm
of a flower first
opening in the morning.
and on a day when I paraded
from my mother's closet
outside into sunlight
with the heart
of an ordinary girl
and fine smooth legs
that could stretch
like a river breaking free
for Spring with broken ice.
I was a boy with extraordinary desire
lifting a borrowed skirt toward heaven
The girl within me
wanted to dance.
she never asked me
she just took my hand
and we have
never stopped.
Lilly Crista
lillyc@tgforum.com
MIRRORED ANGER-Act 1-Explosion
I feel such intense anger.
You ignored my pain.
You ridiculed me.
You shamed me.
You made me feel that I was not a man but not a woman.
You gave me no hope.
When I look at you, your eyes tell me of your distaste.
I hate you.
You stood there and watched as I suffered.
You refused to listen to me.
Your words ring In my ears;"Fag", "Queer", Sissyboy".
You dressed me up as a man and laughed when I rebelled.
I hate you.
You made me look upon myself as a freak.
You let me disconnect
and built a personality that wasn't me
but what you wanted me to be.
You were never there for me
as you encouraged my descent into hell
I hate you.
You stood by and watch as I lay curled in my bed.
You stood by as I tried to rip my genitals off
and give them back to you.
You stood by as I lied to my friends,
your silence louder than my protests.
You made me afraid but
You gave me nothing in return.
I hate you.
I look into you,
my supposed friend, lover, companion,
and
all I see is the mirror of myself.
I hate you.
Sarah Carrier
sarahc@tgforum.com
Hair
Animals we are and will be
even if we become hair-free!
But as I look wearily in the mirror
the chances of that seem slight.
I've tweezed and epilated;
I've Sally Hansen depilitated
but as I reach for a sharp pair of scissors
the future doesn't look bright.
My legs have been shaven
with much attention to detail
and my poor bum is so smooth
I feel like a stainless steel pail!
My underarms quaver
as I reach for the razor
another pass to deliver
another pass to swipe.
My knees are so scarred
that its even getting hard
to face the terror
of bending to keep the skin tight!
Now, as the water drains off
and my cheeks feel nice and soft,
it puts me in desperate woes
to notice one last stubborn one...
growing out of my nose!
Teri Taylor
Anima Shows Her Rotten Face
I
Flare, flash
swim for life
One more storm
to live through
Lightening takes
my photograph
I'm blind
II
I bob like driftwood
stripped from
Clash of waves
I concede another
Limb to sharks
I'm sore
Don't touch me
I grab a figurehead
that floats
When I can't
I bury my face
In wooden breast
I take no chances
In a womb of salt
my skin is molting
I'm exfoliated
Raked across a coral reef
I'm exposed
Don't look at me
III
There's a corset on the beach
Lace it up
pull tight -- no! pull tighter
I'm new
I'm civilized
I can't breathe
Marianna Brillig Brown
brillig@mindspring.com
===============================================
what if there were no divisions
no lines or fences
nothing we could point to and say
this is
that isn't
what if I didn't stop
at the limits of my skin
how would I live
how would I do things differently
if you were me too
if everything were me
what would I be afraid of
what could I possibly fail to love
if it were all me
I would be the white cat
outside my window
would be the lazy clouds
the shopping mall
and the rush hour traffic
I would be the toddler
filled with wonder and glee
the abandoned buildings
constructed with pride
with the illusion of eternity
I would be those
who have not yet outgrown their hatred
who have left part of themselves behind
seeking something better
but not knowing where
what if all these things were me
what if all these were essential
for me to awaken and discover
that I am sacred
because there is no I
no divisions.
Diana Thomas
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