A couple of months ago I came across a new fashion boutique in Dublin whose
owner, Terri, was apparently happy to cater for TVs. You can make an
appointment and visit her in private, which I arranged to do. Having
changed and put on my make-up in the darkness of the car-park to the rear
of her premises (a practice I would not, incidentally, recommend if you
are looking for perfect eyeliner application!) I arrived dressed to the
front of her shop and rang the door-bell. My slight nervousness was
exacerbated when Terri, on answering the door to me, seemed to become
flustered and hesitant about letting me in! With some relief on my part
(and quite a "kick"!), it quickly emerged that she was wondering how she was
going to get rid of what she took to be a real girl, as she realised that
"Susan" would be arriving at any moment for her appointment. She was
genuinely taken aback by how convincing I looked. I loved her immediately!
Anyway, we have since become very good friends and she invited me to go for
a drink with her and a friend the week before Christmas. This was to be in a
regular bar near her shop so I decided to make a special effort to make
myself presentable. I hired a beautiful new wig specially for the occasion,
and dressed in a shortish velvet skirt, a silk wrap blouse over which I
wore my stylish three-quarter length navy woollen coat. I took a lot of
care with my make-up and accessories, at the end of which I was really
pleased, and excited, with the result in my mirror.
Terri lives on the other side of town from me so I faced a six-mile drive
for our rendezvous. About half way there, traffic slowed to a virtual halt.
As I inched along, stuck behind a double-decker bus, I wondered what was
causing the delay. It became clear all too quickly. Being pre-Christmas week,
the Gardai (Police) had set up a drunk-driving check point! While my
confidence had really been boosted by my 'deception' of Terri, my heart
sank in the knowledge that I could not possibly pass a police scrutiny, not
to mention any conversation. There was nothing I could do. I was clearly
visible from the checkpoint, and to do a U-turn would have had a squad car
chasing after me immediately. As I moved forward, I desperately tried to
decide what I should do, but arrived at the checkpoint still mesmerized
with indecision and near panic.
I came to a halt and lowered my windscreen as a Garda (policeman) sauntered
over towards me. My last hope of a cheery wave-on after a glance at my tax
and insurance discs evaporated! What happened next still seems like a
dream.
I gave him a beaming smile as he squatted down, eyeball to eyeball, two
feet away from me. I can't honestly remember the initial conversation, but
I remained so composed I could hardly believe it. I half spoke, half
whispered in as soft a tone as I could manage (which is something I must
really practice more) in what, was without doubt, a distinctly flirty
conversation! I couldn't help but notice that his eyes were drawn to my
knees and the exposed part of my thighs, thankfully shaven and clad in 5
denier black stockings, as he spoke. Having dispensed with festive
greetings and warnings about the dangers of driving with drunken (other)
drivers about, he suggested that I move my handbag from the passenger seat,
in case it should be snatched when I stopped at lights or whatever. "After
all, we don't want you to get a fright, do we Miss?'', he said. If only he
knew what a fright I'd had already. He waved me on with a big smile,
wishing me a safe journey and a Happy Christmas. I drove calmly on to Terri's,
only starting to shake when I was safely inside her door as the
post-traumatic shock finally caught up with me !
On reflection, the episode has been a real boost to my confidence in
passing as a woman - and a rather attractive woman at that! If I'd thought
about it earlier, my biggest fear would have been being "read" in a
situation in which it could have got me into trouble - such as with being
discovered by the police. But not any more!
Susan Sinclair
"Clothes maketh the woman...
but a good wig helps!"
Visit Susan's Web Page