Changing Your Name, Legally
By Stacy M. Clement
For more information on Legally Changing Your Name, read attorney Carolyn Woodward's January 1998 article
For me, as with many of you, the first big hurdle in transition was my name change. I was not blessed with a gender neutral name, so when I appeared as Stacy and applied for work as Ted, heads tilted and eyebrows raised. While I do not necessarily want to go the surgical route, I
do want to live and work and play as Stacy. This required a name change. It's as simple, in
California, as P-P-P. That would be Paperwork, Persistence, and Patience. (Disclaimer: I am
aware that the process may be different in other states and make no claims of representing those
procedures, but there must certainly be parallels. I am also speaking from the male-to-female
perspective and acknowledge and celebrate the F2M procedures, and think they are very similar.)
I began the process by making a few phone calls. If your job or the support group you belong to has a pro bono attorney (FREE!) ask there, if not, call the Department of Vital Statistics or
Records for the process in your area. I called the Superior Court for Los Angeles County; first to
determine which office I needed to visit (with the districting in major metropolitan areas as it is, I
was unsure), and to find out what the procedure for a name change with them was. The name
change required filling out three sets of documents which they provide — a Petition to Change
Name, an Order to Show Cause, and a Decree Changing Name (Forms 403, 404, and 405 respectively) and giving them some money and waiting awhile and appearing before a judge. The paperwork has to be typed or printed in black ink and attached to blue sheets when they are submitted (the blue sheets are also available in the courthouse, their purpose is a mystery to me.) Go to the window in the county superior courthouse for name-change filing (ask the nice man or woman at the metal detector where it is as some offices are with the clerk and some are by themselves.) Once at the appropriate window in the appropriate regional office you will hand over the paperwork (our first P) and a wad of money — It's $189.00 in CA for the filing and another $100.00 or so to publish the name change (publishing the "Order to Show Cause" varies in price relative to the newspaper which provides the service). You will also receive a day and date to appear in court — don't sweat it!.
Once the papers have been filed, your &quoit;Order to Show Cause" has to appear in the newspaper for six weeks (this gives your creditors a chance to catch up with you I guess?) While you wait (the second and third P's) you can make strides by changing your Driver's License, Social Security
Card (same number), and on and on. Each step is filled with paperwork, sometimes accompanied by photos and once in a while an inquisitive look of interest. As for me, the guy in the Social Security Office did not look up, show he cared, or do any more than grunt in response to my questions. The nice lady at the DMV asked if the "m" on my application was correct. I replied to the affirmative and she slammed the stamp down on the paper without a moments hesitation.
At some point during the wait for your court time, you will get copies of the newspaper announcement. You will need to verify that the text is correct. When the day arrives for you to appear before the judge the tension in you will likely be far greater than necessary. I got there
twenty minutes early, dressed conservatively and sweating like, well, sweating. The court process
took about three minutes and consisted of the judge asking me 1) "Do you still want to change
your name as noted on the petition?" "Yes," I replied. 2) "Are you seeking this name change for any purposes of fraud?" "No," I replied. And 3) (addressing the court — all seven people) "Are there any objections to this name change?" Silence. Finally, "Name change granted. Good Luck." Off he went to the next person. The court bailiff made four copies for me and wished me the same good luck and I was out the door. I was floating on air with the elation of birth.
What I learned from this experience is two fold. About the legal system in general and this process in particular, I found that if I was willing to spend the time, learn a little, and risk doing it wrong or doing it over, I could make this move without a lawyer (they often charge $500 or more
to do this procedure which costs only $300 and I did not have the extra money to blow). The other thing I found out was just how many records we have our names on. Think of it... Driver's License, Social Security Number, Birth Certificate (the three big ones) as well as, checking and savings accounts (and IRAs, etc.), credit cards, AAA, warehouse clubs (Costco and Sam's Club), school transcripts (from High School through Graduate School), employment records, dental records, medical records, memberships in professional and social organizations, book clubs, garden clubs, and record clubs, and on and on.
When you apply for a job, you need to give references and work history, right? It is wise to give references of folks in those past positions who know you as, or are willing to refer to you as, feminine. It really screws up an interview to have the potential employer call and find out the
"Mary" never worked there or, the yes "Terri, he was a good employee." Consistent referral of both name and gender presentation are important and sometimes become vital in moving around
in today's world. I have had to change my name on my school transcripts and had to order (and pay for)
new diplomas as well. If you intend to display your hard-won sheepskins, you should do this too.
By now, I am pleased to report that I have conquered all the bureaucrats I have faced and am legally, (nearly universally) and joyfully, Stacy Marie Clement (Stacy M. Clement to the
folks who worry about name equals gender.)
Oh, I still get called "Ted" by my family and sometimes I get "sir" on the telephone, but face-to-face the effect of having my driver's license, credit cards, and checking account all match my feminine presentation is sure to illicit "madams" every time. Isn't that what its all about?
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