Transgender

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The Occasional Observations
of an Opinionated Lady

Pick Me A Winner

By Hebe Dotson

I'm gorgeous, and that's a fact. Even though this is an opinion column, there's nothing that says I can't dazzle you with a fact or two from time to time. And how did I obtain the precious pearl of factuality that I've just shared with you? Scientifically, of course -- from occasional observations in the mirror just outside my closet door.

The geezerly gentleman who usually appears in that mirror confirms my observations. His excellent memory recalls the same fleeting but nonetheless smashing apparition as mine does. Not just beauteous, but young! Another fact.

Gorgeous I may be, but I'll never be Miss TGF. If nominated, I will not run; if elected, I will not serve, to quote that nineteenth-century sound bite maven, William Tecumseh Sherman.

Although I may be a non-candidate (for reasons that I'll get to eventually), I'll never be a non-voter. I take my civic responsibilities very seriously indeed, and I vote whenever I have an opportunity. I discovered TGF in time to vote for Miss TGF 1997, I voted again this year, and I'll be in there marking my ballot in 1999.

What terrific groups of candidates we've had! I found it so hard to narrow my choices down. In 1997, I just voted my feelings without making any effort to rationalize my choices. This year, part-way into the process, I realized that I was judging my sisters through the eyes of a certain geezerly male chauvinist. Were they pretty? Were they shapely? Were they attractively dressed? Nothing else mattered.

If I were to lurch out of my closet and into the light of day, would it bother me to find some man viewing me as a sex object? Hardly; I'd be thrilled -- not by the thought of sex with a man, but with the success of my self-presentation. As a lady, however -- and be assured that I am a lady -- I like to think that I judge my sisters by loftier standards than those used by the stereotypical male. Obviously, the Miss TGF contestants (Flight 1, Flight 2, Finalists) were going all-out to present themselves attractively, and their degree of success should be part of the judgment equation -- but only a part.

The earnest liberal side of me (perhaps not my best side) immediately set to work developing criteria. What could be more important in evaluating a Miss TGF candidate than her service to the transgendered community? That service can take many forms -- aiding, assisting, and educating other TGs; helping non-TGs to understand and accept us; working for TG civil rights; or perhaps just offering quiet assurance to someone struggling to accept this gift/curse that has been inflicted/bestowed upon her. I wouldn't place any one of these above the others -- I'd just award five points for any form of community service. As it happened, most of the Miss TGF candidates listed their community concerns and activities among their qualifications.

In my opinion, the next most important criterion for a Miss TGF, the one that earns my unwavering admiration, is courage -- the personal courage required to present her true self to a not-always-accepting world. She may have come out to only one or two people; she may be blending or passing among strangers; she may be out to everyone at all times, unconcerned about whether or not she passes. It takes a lot of courage to do any of these things, and many Miss TGF candidates had this quality in abundance. Again, I wouldn't say that one manifestation of courage was better than another -- I'd just award five points to each candidate who displayed any that I've listed (or others).

My next criterion gets away from the words and goes to the photographs. How successful is a candidate's presentation? She may not be movie-star gorgeous, but does she come across as female? Give her another five points. Now, we all know that pictures can lie a little -- you're not going to see her looming over everyone else in a crowd; you can't watch her walk or hear her speak -- but I don't mind if art wins an occasional minor conflict with veracity.

So there we have it -- three impeccable criteria for judging Miss TGF candidates. And what do you do when these inevitably result in a ten- or twenty-way fiteen-point tie? You fall back upon a fourth criterion, the highly objective tiebreaker used by my geezerly acquaintance -- attractiveness. Is she pretty? Is she shapely? Is she well-dressed? Is she awe-inspiring? In a word, is she a 10? "Yes" to all of the above? Then she must be Miss TGF!

That's my analytical, earnest-liberal approach. The only problem with it is that it takes me right out of the running as far as my own vote is concerned. If I only had a heart...a brain...some courage...but I don't have enough of these (yet) to meet my own standards, thus ensuring my non-candidacy. All the rest of you are safe -- go ahead and run next year; you'll get my votes.

Fortunately, I'm not always entirely earnest and analytical. There's also an "all in fun" side to being TG... Maybe I should look into that approach.


My opinions are, of course, invariably correct. If you agree with me -- or even if you have the temerity to disagree -- I'd love to hear from you. My e-mail address is hebedotson@tgforum.com.
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