A Little Help From A Big Sister
By Desiree Corley
An old cliché, "Clothes do not make the (wo)man", is frequently trotted out in the transgendered community to reproach those who are seen as too vain or too obsessed with the physical side of their gender expression. Especially chastised is the transvestite who gets all dolled up, and then pops a cold one to watch the Monday Night game. Yet, chastisement is not what this TV needs.
When I was a little girl, I played with Barbie. I'll admit it, I loved the blonde-haired, wasp-waisted fashion model. Did I play with her to explore my gender role or get in touch with my feminine side? Heck no. I wanted Pretty in Pink Barbie not as a role model for the perfect woman, but for that beautiful pink fur stole.
Many of the so-called superficial crossdressers are as I was as a little girl. We desire the beauty of the female figure presented before us. We want to be the pretty one, the fashion model, the glamorous movie star, because we are little girls, children who do not understand what it is to be a woman. It is personal growth that transforms that superficial desire into a wish for understanding of femininity, whether you are a TV, TS, TG, CD, or like me, a GG.
What do we do help our sisters "to go to where no man has gone before," the true realm of the woman? As wives, we can be role models and mentors. Remember adolescence, ladies? It was our mom who taught us what it was to be a woman, not Vogue or MTV. Your husband needs you to discover that woman within, not a television or silver screen.
As TG sisters, we need to hearken to back to when we were first coming out of the closet, those first dark steps into a world we didn't know, but wanted to enter so badly . What helped you take those steps beyond the façade and into reality? Sharing your experiences and expertise is one of the best ways to help your 'sis'.
Instead of Pretty in Pink Barbie, I now yearn for that Scarlett O'Hara doll, adorned in a dress made from curtains, with the will and the strength and the cunning to save that which she loves, and obtain that which she desires, with all of the sophistication of a true lady.
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