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One to One

With Cindy Martin
Transgender Forum Publisher

© 1997 Transgender Forum
Got a news tip? Seen a story with a TG angle to it?
Don't assume we know about it already.
Email Cindy and she'll spread the news!


September 29, 1997

N
o class at all...

Marv Alpert calls a woman up to his room and she finds him wearing white panties and a white garterbelt. Marv is aroused and tells her he needs some "relief". Now what kind of low-rent person does a thing like that?

Note to Marv: next time wear Black lingerie, or at the very least, red. White is for brides and virgins, which obviously you aren't. No wonder that poor woman was so offended.

Around my office the reaction to the Albert case was interesting to say the least. The conservative types were sure he was ruined because of the kinky sex stories while the liberals thought the biting incidents were the more destructive. Obviously, I thought his bad taste in sleazewear was what brought him down.

I am somewhat concerned that Albert's lingerie thing will reflect badly on us, though the more I think about it the more I sort of doubt it. I just don't think most people think of him as transgender. A violent oddball maybe, but not TG. Still, his case raises the question: does wearing women's underwear for sexual pleasure in and of itself make a person transgender?

I've wondered about aspects of this for years and I know many others have also. Every once in a while I'll receive a letter or a photo from someone who will tell me that their love of women's clothes is nothing but sexual. More than a few wives have told me that this is all it is to their husbands, it's just a bedroom thing.

I believe them. That isn't how it is for me, but I believe them. And, if that is really the truth, that their entire behavior is a sexual thing, then I don't believe they are actually transgender.

Like many of us the discovery that I was transgender did include sexual aspects. But I don't define myself by my sexual tastes. I define myself by who I am 24 hours a day and that definition includes being very strongly feminine. The way I see it, if femininity isn't part of who you are then all the sexiest underwear in the world won't make you transgender. Horny maybe, but not transgender.

Did I say Marv Albert had no class?

Here's some real trash behavior for you:

A Roanoke, Virginia, transgender woman recently contacted Virginians for Justice about an employment discrimination case. While VJ was unable to directly help with funding for her case, they were able to provide her with access to their mailing list, advice and connections. Good work.

Last week the Human Rights Campaign contacted VJ about any reported cases of employment discrimination. Now you may remember that the HRC is a gay organization trying to get the federal Employment Non Discrimination Act passed. You may also remember that the group is doing all it can to keep us out of the law. This same group, by the by, is going to be the first gay organization ever honored by having had a president speak at one of its events. This is an important organization, though as you shall see, one without honor.

The Virginians for Justice group duly reported the transgender's case to HRC, but, according to a spokeswoman "we found that HRC is not interested in including this case in it's discrimination reporting." In other words they said the TGs problems wasn't their problem.

This organization is about as misnamed as it can be. The Some Humans InTerest Campaign would be more like it. Do NOT ever contribute anything, money or time to this group of lowlife bastards who have somehow wheedled their way into the corridors of power in Washington.

The more I learn and hear about the HRC the more I realize that they have learned the game inside the beltway all too well. They are really no different than any of the other unprincipled lobby groups in Washington. And that's fine. Most gay organizations are with us, these guys aren't. Fine, good to know who your friends AND your enemies are.

I
knew my journalist friend David Tuller was working on an FTM story because he had asked me several times in recent months for names and leads on people. David, you may remember, carried a wonderful chapter on transsexuals in his 1996 book on gay Russia, Cracks In the Iron Closet, and had maintained an interest in the subject since then.

I gave him a few contacts and off he went. A few months later he asked me to read a story he'd done for the San Francisco Chronicle and to "check it" for him. I didn't know what he meant. Did he want me to read it over for copy errors? No, he wanted me to check it, to make sure what he'd written wouldn't offend anyone. I was both flattered and a little disappointed. David is a terrific reporter, a professional. And any good reporter should be able to write about ANY subject without having to have it "cleared" by someone in the minority group it is aimed at. You know the old saw about priests being able to counsel people about marriage without being married. Their training is supposed to qualify them. The world will not be a better place if journalists tiptoe around controversial subjects because it might offend someone.

Anyway, I told David I would read it because I would enjoy it, not because he needed to clear anything with me. If there were factual errors I'd let him know, but otherwise I wasn't going to mess with the material.

The story, which focussed on James Green, perhaps the best known FTM in the world right now, was stunning. Green's childhood fantasies of growing up to be a boy were layed out smoothly and honestly. But perhaps the best part of the article involved a moment of tension between James and his girlfriend who were in the throes of a major relationship problem. It was so real and so politically incorrect.

The story is a master work. I'm working on getting the rights to reprint it, and the extraordinary pictures that went with it.

M
any of you will be going to the Southern Comfort Conference in Atlanta next week, which kicks off a long series of great fall-winter events this year.

One that is particularly dear to my heart is the ETVC Cotillion, always one of the great events in the community. A combination beauty pageant, dinner, and debutante coming out party, the Cotillion caps a three-day TG funfest in San Francisco, one of the great TG cities on earth. This year's show will be at the Showplace Galleria, a very fancy venue, and over 400 people are expected. If you'd like to know more, write to ETVC by email.


August 25, 1997

L
oud applause for "It's Time, Illinois" and particularly Miranda Stevens, vice-chair of ITI, who spearheaded the effort to get an anti-bias ordinance enacted in Evanston, Ill. early this month.

There aren't many places in the U.S. that offer any kind of protection against discrimination in housing and employment: San Francisco, Santa Cruz, CA, Seattle, Cedar Rapids, IA, Cambridge, MA and the state of Minnesota.

Ms. Stevens, ITI and the City Council of Evanston are all to be congratulated for making their community a part of this elite group.

Interesting footnote: In most of the places where laws have been enacted they have been the result of individuals or very small groups who have worked quietly behind the scenes with legislators. It's not very exciting work, but good old fashioned personal politickin' is still a great way to get things done.

B
ig boob alert!

A word of warning from TGF member Stefi: "a start-up company is seeking "test market" candidates for a system which purports to increase breast size of either men or women via the use of a "patent-pending" machine which stimulates and stretches the breast tissue.

There may be a scientific basis for this reflecting increased blood flow and the web-site the company has set up looks quite legitimate. The problem is what they want to know from you. In laboriously-long registration for potential test-market candidates, amongst the other highly-personal information, buried within the form is a space for a U.S.Social Security number".

Stefi points out, quite accurately, that the divulgence of a Social Security number could be devastating if it ends up in the wrong hands. Why on earth a bood-enlargement company would want this number is beyond me. A valid credit card number should be plenty of security deposit for such a device.

Social Security numbers are the key to "identity theft" , a fast growing crime in which a no-goodnik takes over your identity and effectively steal credit. Trust me, it sucks when you get a phone call from a finance company wondering when you're going to make a payment on that $10,000 diamond bracelet they say you bought on credit five months ago.

I won't do business with ANY company that asks for my Social Security number, unless I'm borrowing or depositing money there, like a bank or brokerage firm. Employers have a right to know this number, but that's about it.

If a merchant - or a test marketer - insists on getting your Social Security number to complete a transaction take your business elsewhere. It isn't worth the risk no matter how intriguing the product.

C
ool Quote of the Month:

"Former midget and sprint-car racer J.T. Hayes, 35, underwent a sex-change operation and now goes by the name of Terri O'Connell. "You see," O'Connell told the Philadelphia Daily News, "I not only wanted to be A. J. Foyt, I wanted to be Marilyn Monroe."

Our own Angela Gardner wrote extensively on O'Connell in a recent column if you'd like to know more. Many thanks to Ricki for spotting this item.

E
every June we have a little tradition at TGF and do a bridal pictorial, which was a smash again this year. I'll be honest with you though, I never really expect to get the kind of wonderful photos we always get. Wedding gowns are not that easy to come by, yet many people have incredible ones. If you're a subscriber you can view the 1997 Bridal Joy pictorial in our archives.

The reason I mention this is that there is now, believe it or not, a Bridal Gown Shop for Men, online at http://www.eroshop.com/dreamgown/e_index.htm. These folks are NOT advertisers here so I cannot vouch for their integrity or products, but I thought you might enjoy checking this most unusual site.


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