Dear Rachael,



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I am a TS person who lives in Montana.

My job as Computer Network Manager is ending in a few months and I need to move somewhere to pursue my TS life. I dress as a boy at work but am somewhat androgynous in appearance. Unfortunately I have a lot of body hair. I am willing to move where the support and work opportunities to be a woman forever are the best. I'm considering Portland and or Seattle. I want to throw all male cloths away, look for counseling and work as a woman. I've tried counseling here in Montana and the psychs look at me with religious disgust and don't know what to say. I need help before I go nuts. Any suggestions as a good city to live and meet friends as a woman?

Andrea

Dear Andrea:

The San Francisco Bay Area is a wonderful place to live, but then I'm prejudiced. I live there and find that attitudes are fairly liberal. But don't be confused. There can be ugliness anywhere. The attitudes you experienced in Montana can and do exist everywhere. They may be just more prevalent there. Portland or Seattle? Sure, why not. My suggestion to be to go where the jobs are.

You may not want to be too quick to throw your "boy" clothes away. As wrong as it is, women still don't fair as well as guys in the business world. And a transsexual? Well, you may not find too many open arms, no matter where you go. Don't cut your options too soon. You can always transition (make it sound easy, huh?) on the job AFTER you have established credibility. I wish it were not this way, but...... life is not always fair. Rachael

Dear Rachael: It has finally time for me to start reaching out to other people. I have denied my urge to cross-dress most of my life. I am 49 years old and other than the last couple of years I have rarely cross-dressed. The fantasies and dreams have always been there. I have decided it is time to also find a good therapist and would welcome any suggestions you have. I live in Santa Clara. All my cross-dressing activities have been strictly at home when I am alone. I have finally come to accept that it is not something that will go away. I hope some day to be able to accept it as a gift instead of a curse. I would appreciate any suggestions you have.

Daria

Dear Daria:

It sounds like you are beginning to accept your feminine self as a legitimate human being, rather than someone to kept hidden in the closet, i.e., your curse. You are on the right road, hon. The fact that you wish to explore this with a therapist tells me that you really have your act together . . . or soon will have, smile. You are headed towards self acceptance and happiness . . . good luck!

Here are therapists in your area ( We are neighbors ). There are others as well.


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