The TG Consumer: Rights & Expectations

You as a transgender individual are a consumer like any other. You have money to spend and needs to be met. Do you approach such interactions with an expectation of respect and appreciation for your business? Or does the memory of past transactions contaminated by ridicule and frustration inhibit you with regard to examining products for quality, and holding service providers to a standard of courtesy?

A satisfactory consumer interaction begins with the expectation of quality products and service. To the extent that you are informed about the product or service you seek, you will be able to express your expectation in an unambiguous manner. However, if you are hobbled by anxiety, fear of others' judgment, and personal insecurity, all the product information in the world will do you little good. You will be treated with the respect you show for yourself and will be presented with the products that the sales person has been instructed to "move."

And do not think that over-compensating for insecurity or developing an "attitude" to ward off insensitive treatment will be effective. By acting arrogant and demanding you are more likely to elicit the very behavior you are trying to avoid. Efforts to intimidate others breed resentment rather than respect and retaliation follows fast.

Given that you are able to present yourself confidently and are well-informed about your objective, you may still find the shopping experience an unpleasant one. You may be identified as TG by the service provider and either treated disrespectfully or denied service. No one will come to your rescue. This is where Assertiveness 101 will pay for itself. Inquire of the provider if your request was understood and offer to repeat it. If appropriate, ask if it is the store's policy for personnel to whisper, giggle, point at or laugh at its customers. Offer to overlook the offense if the person will get on with serving you. If further disrespect occurs, request the person's name and that of the manager.

If you are denied service insist on being given a reason. If you are insulted by a derogatory term referring to your TG status such as "you people" (or worse) you have several options: Identify yourself with pride as TG, entitled to and able to pay for the requested product or service. If reconsideration does not occur state that you will file a complaint of discrimination with the Human Rights Organization of that County as well as with the professional association(s) monitoring the industry involved. It behooves any consumer to be prepared in such an event but it is incumbent upon you as a TG individual or anyone belonging to vulnerable minority group, to be explicitly armed with solid information about how to exercise your rights as a consumer.

If you choose not to identify yourself as a TG individual and the provider of services does not identify you as being of a minority status, you cannot raise the issue of discrimination. Then the best strategy is to behave as an aggrieved consumer who will relentlessly seek satisfaction at levels above the service person. Sources tell me that service providers would rather serve someone with 2 heads than have to explain to their boss why they have allowed a scene to occur. Implementing this strategy implies a willingness on your part to state your dissatisfaction audibly and unequivocally and perhaps draw attention to yourself.

The pursuit of professional services such as medical, psychological or legal present a special challenge for the consumer. The challenge comes in the difficulty of evaluating the quality of services offered as well as in dealing with providers who are generally endowed with higher status than the consumers of their services. TG consumers often feel even more vulnerable than the average client because of the myths about the TGed that still pervade the thinking of professionals. The belief that TGism is a mental disorder and therefore one will be dealing with a deranged, delusional person puts many professionals off. There is also the belief that one's other clients will be discouraged if they observe TG individuals being served in the same setting. The best way to avoid approaching the uninformed professional, who is also incompetent to serve you, is to utilize a resource list compiled by your local TG community organizations or by national associations devoted to serving TG consumers and setting standards for competent professional care.

Being a consumer is a difficult business. But that's what it's all about. Business! As a consumer you have something of value. Respect your power but don't flaunt it. Hold yourself in high regard and and you maximize the chance that others will. Be prepared to go to bat for your right to be served; you may be paving the way for another consumer more vulnerable than you.

Dr. Anderson is a therapist in the San Francsico Bay Area. She can be reached at 415-776-0139. This article originally appeared in Devil Woman, the newsletter of the Diablo Valley Girls.


© 1996 by Barbara Anderson & 3-D Communications, Inc.