By Kim Seabury
She arranged for me begin sessions with local physciatric clinic. At first, I was not allowed to dress as a girl. But after about about six months, and just after my 15th birthday, with permission from my mother, I was asked if I would like to start attending the sessions in girl's clothing. I was still not allowed dress as a girl outside the clinic, however.
After being allowed to start to attending the sessions in girls clothing, I was transferred to a clinic in Minneapolis. I was raised in a semi-rural suburb of the Twin Cities, but very seldomly got the chance to go to Minneapolis. It was very exciting, it was such a modern city. It was difficult for my mother, to be sure, but she had indicated very early on that she would always love me no matter what. I'm told that I was very lucky.
The clinic I was transferred to specialized in the treatment of tenage transexual's. I didn't have any real friends at the time, so talking with other boys with similar feelings proved invaluable.
Within three months of going to Minneapolis, I became very close to a boy from Chicago. He had begun RLT (Real Life Training) and was absolutly gorgeous. I mean drop dead gorgeous -- I was soo jealous. He was a little older than I was and further along in his treatments. We talked all the time, about everything. Our favorite topics, like most girls our age, were clothes and boys. He more than any doctor, helped me to realize who I really was. It was soo much fun talking to him, for the first time I began to be comfterble with how I feel. I had been told that I was very convincing dressed as a girl, but when my friend from Chicago told me, it gave me a renewed sence of self-confidence.
Things were getting difficult at school, so my mom arranged for me to get my high school degree through correspondance classes. Everyone at school knew I was effeminate, and I had been called a fairy since grade school. However, when it got out that I was into girls clothes, things totally changed. I quit when I was 15.
After about nine months at the clinic, my mom began acting a little different. I was still not allowed to dress as a girl outside the clinic, but, whenever possible, when my mom was gone, which was often, I would go through her wardrobe. But, I knew that she knew. She made no pretense of it, and would leave her bedroom door unlocked.
So it was a complete shock when she asked me if I would like to go shopping. She didn't say for what, but I knew. What I didn't realize at the time was that the doctors had indicated to her that I should began RLT (Real Life Training) to determine how valid my feelings were.
The next day, my mother and I had a meeting with two physicatrists, one who I had been seeing regularly. I was wearing the clothes that we had purchased the previous day. They wern't dressy, but still very feminine. After a little small talk, the male doctor, who I had met with about ten times before, said in a deep beratone voice, "After discussing it with your mother, and if you would like, we think that it would be OK for you to start RLT".
I looked over towards my mother, who had a sullen, expressionless face. She nodded. I couldn't believe it, here I was a 16 year old boy, being told that they were going to help me become a women. I had fantacised about this moment for a long time, but here it was. I can't even begin to describe the mixed bag of emotions that I felt. I was going to become a women. But, thats not how they saw it, it was just one step, an important step, along that path. Nevertheless, I never really looked back from that point.
I was to get my SRS about two years later, at the age of 18. Today, I'm a happily married 27 year old women, with two adopted Romanian babies. I have no regrets.
Next month: The men that have been in my life.
If you would like to touch base with me, anonomously only, drop Cindy a line and mention that you are trying to reach Kim.