M rs. Silk, who operates a Maid Training school in England, has been a friend of mine for some time. Her "school" is quite busy and not only is she employed full-time as a Mistress, she also has had to hire two other ladies to assist her in this training.
Over time, I have tried to verbalize to Mrs. Silk what it is that makes me feel that her Maid Training does not appeal to me personally, although I would love one of the outfits. Recently, the words came to me that enable me to say what it is.
While Mrs. Silk and her co-mistresses all have a fondness for and understanding of men who crossdress, the school seems to operate upon a theme of humiliation and revenge, as opposed to feminization and love.
An underlying theme appears to be that men are dirty, rude, unkempt and generally in need of extinction. How can I describe the fundamental, yet all important difference between feminization and emasculation?
Consider the partner. Is she, the spouse/partner, assisting with the crossdresser's desire to become a woman out of caring and love, or some deep-seated anger? Is the motive joint pleasure or revenge? Another important difference between the two is this: In emasculation, there is no regard for the person's dignity. Whereas, in feminization, there is a caring and tenderness in helping the crossdresser become the femme self.
There is obviously a market for such a business as Mrs. Silk's, yet I am unclear as to exactly how mainstream her vision of crossdressing is. As she has written, there is an entire spectrum of crossdresser.
In my own relationship, I am fortunate enough to have a partner, Linda, who realizes that Vanessa is a real person, with feelings, dreams, desires, needs and dignity. If you are a crossdresser, you should realize that there is no shame in being who you are. The fantasy of being forced to dress is one that is employed to ease feelings of guilt. There should be no such guilt; you are you and that is how it is meant tocrossdresser, I urge you to treat them with the same respect and dignity with which they should treat you with. If the crossdresser, or the partner, is unable to treat the other with common courtesy and respect, there is something far more seriously wrong transgenderism.
Life is short and this is a small planet. Treat one another with kindness.
Hugs, Vanessa