Psst, hey! Do you feel like me? Are you hard pressed by this macho
cruel thing? Do you chafe at society's definitions of sex and
gender? Come walk with me for a while and chew through these thoughts.
What is it about donning ladies apparel that drives us so? We have different reasons at different times. It's exciting, it's relaxing, it's just a part of us. Well, what's behind all those reasons? Different things, the same thing, nothing?
When we dress to relax, there seems to be an existential comfort in the embrace of these soft garments. It is a spiritual act, when we toss aside our macho facades and allow ourselves the greater expression to accept the clothes, manners and movements of the softer sex.
The modern definition of maleness is as emotionally restricting as any foundation garment is physically restricting. (Of course, many of us love the physical restrictions, and eschew the emotional confinements of our born gender.) Being male today means being cold, abrupt, hard. At least, this is the training given in so many areas. When we cross the gender border by slipping into the apparel of the other sex, we slip the bounds of our male roles.
When we repress our crossdressing urges, we submit to the social confines that define our being. For crying out loud, I wouldn't cross my legs for 30 years because I was raised that only women and "fags" did that! What a liberating feeling to get more comfortable and not be aiming my crotch at other people in the room!
So what does it mean that we're excited by dressing en femme? Is it the daredevil rush of invading the forbidden feminine sanctuary? Are transvestites really bold adventurers?
This is an image that we need to reinforce further, I think. Transvestites as Gender Outlaws. Rogues in rouge. You know, give our image a makeover. What does the polling data say?
Anyway.... where were we?
Maybe, for the hetero amongst us, it's more that we are getting so close to the objects of our desires. If we can't get inside their skins, we'll be inside their dresses. For others, we want our turn on that pedestal.
Or, it could be that modern society fosters fetishes through the images pulsed out through modern advertising. "Slim and sexy and wearing the latest from Calvin Klein is the way to be!" Oops, maybe the messages landed off target and now millions of men are responding. Maybe they're just reinforcing traits we have anyway. (I know when I buy a Tuesday New York Times, I do it as much for the fashion coverage as for the Science Times.)
Many women today are trying to escape the "Beauty Myth" that leads them to diet, purge and paint their faces. But TVs want to live the myth, even if only on weekends.
I don't know. I just want to be free.
Free from what? Well, let's save that discussion for another day....