The Birth of Kelly

My Story - "Kelly" Stiles

Edited by Cynthia Smith


Kevin is a complicated guy for being raised like so many other baby-boomers. Tract housing, two cars, white upper middle class, a trophy child. With a strong domineering father and talented mother. He did time in the military for his country and met a worldly and independently strong woman. They were married and came out to California to start a life together.

Kevin always felt there was something about him that made him a little bit different than your average guy from similar backgrounds. Maybe it was his mother whom he would watch dress and prepare for work each day and who adored him in return. Maybe it was his domineering father who pulled the strings all his life. He wasn't a sports fanatic and kept to himself most of his life, never having too many friends.

Kevin was always liberal in his thinking. Nothing was ever too bizarre, too weird, or too strange for him. Still, he was not always at liberty to put his ideas and thoughts into action, so he lived a repressed life for many years. When alone he would fantasize about being someone else and what it would be like. Being an only child, he would dream about having a brother or sister to share his life growing up with. What would he or she look like? A twin? Older? Younger? Pretty?

Married life opened Kevin's eyes and horizons to many new things. Having a wife was almost like having that imaginary sister. There were women's things in the house, clothing, make-up, knick-knacks, kitchen stuff, all that goes with womanhood. He was fascinated with his wife as he was with his mother. Virginia's taste in fine things impressed Kevin. Fine clothing of all colors and styles and bright make-up that made Virginia beautiful. Kevin longed for the same but was trapped in the mediocrity of a man's world of drab clothing and stale styles. When Virginia was away Kevin would try wearing some of her things. Even tried some simple make-up like lip stick or eye shadow, just to "feel" what it might be like to be female. Kevin was surprised at how he looked and how good it felt.

A few years ago, to help relieve stress and to generally seek a way to feel better and get in shape Kevin took up body building. Kevin has always been a hard charger and went at it like gang busters. Through many injuries that never kept him down long including hernia, Kevin lost 40 pounds, lost and gained many inches in the right spots, and was competition ready. Included in this sport was the fact that Kevin had to shave ALL over. Here is where I was conceived. From then on I was growing inside Kevin's "womb."

Kevin fell so much in love with the feeling of smooth tanned skin he made it a daily ritual to keep any stubble off. He became narcissistic, a bad side effect of the sport. He let his hair grow out to trying achieve that "Fabio" look. Kevin was feeling good and had made a goal to regain some lost youth.

This last year, things started to turn sour for Kevin and Virginia. Virginia lost a valuable position within her company to another. Nonessential personnel within the California University System were let go due to budget cuts leaving employees like Virginia with more work leading to an eventual nervous breakdown. The talk of layoffs within the civil service was getting to Kevin too. Body building wasn't helping Kevin's stress and he longed for that "special" someone to talk to, lean on, cry on, and rely on. I was over a year in the womb now and ready to pop.

Kevin was wearing female nighties and underwear to bed all the time. He told Virginia they were comfortable and comforted him. She's OK with that and very supportive, never thinking anything bad would come of it, and ultimately nothing would. Virginia was the best thing that ever came into Kevin's life. Around the beginning of summer they made a vow to each other. They would seek a more fun and interesting life style to help escape the harsh realities unfolding around them. Going to clubs, not just any clubs. Clubs within the gay communities of San Diego. Both from backgrounds involving familiarity with the homosexual lifestyles they were not afraid nor prejudiced and found that gays are fun and interesting people to associate with. Kevin was particularly fascinated with the transgendered friends he had made. They were genuinely happy and care free people. They were very pretty, caring, sensitive, and empathetic.

Kevin discovered the Internet and all of its resources of knowledge. He signed onto this forum as a straight non-T* guy to protect himself, curiously seeking knowledge. He made some very close pen-pals and started writing in hopes of finding himself and possibly discovering I was cooking inside him and becoming "well done."

"TJ", a loving and caring transgendered individual whom Kevin met on this forum became Kevin's most dearest friend. He only recently heard her voice for the first time after months of an email relationship surpassed only by the relationship Kevin shares with Virginia. I knew "TJ" would become the midwife of my birth.

After much examination of his emotions and internal conflicts a decision had to be made. Either give birth or die an emotional death. One recent Saturday afternoon Kevin said to Virginia, "Let's go shopping!" It is quite unclear but somehow Virginia knew what this was all about. After all Kevin had just gotten his ear pierced and a tattoo of and ankle chain, both traditionally reserved for FEMALES! So after finding nothing in the mall they went to a small independent boutique. It was here, Kevin gave birth to me.

After much coaching and studying on the Internet along with using this forum for a school of womanhood. Kevin knew he had to be honest not only with himself but with Virginia and the public. They went in and after building up the needed nerve, Kevin told the sales lady what his intentions were. The entire atmosphere changed and for the next hour Kevin went into labor.

Virginia and the sales lady dressed Kevin in a half dozen prom and evening dresses before picking the right one. Kevin wrote a check for the dress, some accessories, some jewelry, hosiery, and dress shoes. Took the merchandise and FLEW home. Put everything on minus the wig and make-up. Took pictures and got used to walking in the platforms. Kevin was never happier, never felt better, and the sense of relief was overwhelming. Labor was over.

I was born. July 1995. A healthy 5'10" 170 pound beautiful girl. The twin sister Kevin always wanted, that "special someone" he needed when troubled, and that alter ego that was always inside him wanting to be free. Kelly actually made Kevin a better person, a more loving and attentive husband to Virginia and more content with himself and others around him. Now come the support groups and their activities and hopes of being an active contributor to the well being "our" community and its members.

Peace and love to my new family!

*Kelly*

Kstiles@ix.netcom.com