Your Innvestment | |
Vol. 7, No. 9 |
June 1999 |
PAGE INDEX
Monday evening on
the 7th of June, Innvestments met for their last official meeting
until September. Folks gathered at the Ramada Inn at 7 p.m. where
Julie had her television gear set up to video tape everyone in
a walking scenario. Members walked across the room, pirouetting
and walking some more. When watching it in the television monitor
you could see many different stances, walks and wiggles...everyone
had their own style of doing things. Also what the girls wore
had a big influence on how they moved and what the outcome of
their walk looked like. Long flowing dresses gave one impression
while tight skirts gave yet another and slacks and blue jeans
gave still yet one more. All in all it was a rather interesting
experiment.
The discussion for the evening centered on some
television programs, such as Rikki Lake, etc., that had featured
transgendered folks in one style or another, and if they had or
had not contributed to what was called the general acceptance
of transgendered folks in everyday life. Again, opinions differed
widely, but it was a good discussion.
As this was the last official meeting we all
adjourned to Kelsey Lynn's, a restaurant located adjacent to the
airport. We learned of Kelsey Lynn's from Joey at Mallory Dock
when we had our birthday party so we checked it out one day. Elaine
and I stopped by one noon and had lunch. The meal was truly superb.
I also spoke to the owner, Nancy O'Neil and she assured me that
everything would be just fine and we were all welcome...which
we were. When we first went in we gave everyone in the lounge
somewhat of a jolt, but everything soon settled down. At first
things were a bit of a madhouse and Nancy worked her buns off
waiting tables to take care of our group. She had a small staffing
problem that evening but everything worked out just fine...and
the food...absolutely fantastic. This is one of the best and least
known eating establishments on Cape Cod, guaranteed. Our compliments
to the chef.
Our next event, although not a regular meeting,
will be our bar-b-q and pool party in July at the Randolph Country
Club off Cape. We invite you all to join with us at pool side
where you can parade that new one piece or that skimpy bikini
to your hearts content.
The Tiffany Club invites us at 6:30 p.m. on
the 25th of June to attend their Annual Spring Prom, also being
held at the Randolph Country Club. See flyer on page 10.
About Innvestments
and Your Innvestment
Your
Innvestment is
a publication of Innvestments, P.O. Box 2194, Orleans,
MA.0 2653-2194. Innvestments is a non-sexual service organization
founded to support and to provide a socially acceptable outlet
for the crossdressing, transvestite, transsexual, transgendered
community located primarily in Southeastern Massachusetts, Cape
Cod and the Island. All rights reserved. Permission to reprint
any article appearing in Your Innvestment is hereby granted to non-profit similar organizations
provided that publication and authorship credit is given. Any
commercial use of Your Innvestment material is hereby prohibited.
Some material may have previously appeared in print. Publication
and authorship rights of material reprinted from other
sources remain with its originator. The editor/s of Your Innvestment
are not under any obligation to accept information and advertisements.
Information and advertisements may be published in any form deemed
acceptable. Any information about services, products or sympathetic
locations published in Your Innvestment is not considered
an endorsement of such by the staff of Your Innvestment
or the Board of Directors of Innvestments. Innvestments is
also know in open
source
publications as
Cape Cod Cross Dressers.
Liz W.....................................................President
Julie W..(stimpyl@capecod.net)...Vice President
Brenda L. (Brrendaa@aol.com)...........Treasurer
Judy T.........................................................Board
Candy Scott.................................................Board
PO Box 354
Sagamore, MA 02561-0354
Tel.: 508+563-3160 (Keep trying)
Fax.: 508+563-1240
email: candyscott@capecod.net
Membership (including newsletter) is $30.00 per-year (pro-rated after January) with a $15.00 meeting fee. Meeting fees payable only for those attended. This pays meeting location fees charged to e group, and for pizza and soda for all. Subscription only rates are $10.00 per year.
I'm
sure that those of you who have been surfing the net until the
wee hours have found all sorts of web sites that have aroused
your interest. In some discussions with several surfers, it seems
that very few look at the same sites. With the exception of IFGE,
Tiffany Club, Fantasia Fair and some of the other key organizational
sites, everyone has their favorites. We would like to make some
of those sites known to the membership as everyone seems to be
looking for much of the same information but is searching all
over the place to find it. If you would like to help your sisters,
please send some of your favorite sites and perhaps a comment
or two about them so we can put them in the newsletter. Just email
them to candyscott@capecod.net and we will include them in future
issues.
This
months review is http:// women.com/.
This is a web site that is chock full of tips
for every imaginable situation. And it keeps changing with updates
and new information for many of our favorite subjects. The current
web as of the first of June includes the following key subjects:
Careers; Cars; Entertainment; Fashion and Beauty; Fitness; Food;
Garden; Health; Home; Horoscope; Money; News and Travel; Pregnancy;
Relationships; Shopping; Small Business; Tech and Internet; Travel
and even Weddings.
Under subjects like Fashion and Beauty, there
is a plethora of pages with different subject that will keep you
busy for a long, long time.
This is the official site of Hearsts portfolio
of women's magazines which you can find on most newsstands. Having
had to read 50 to 60 magazines, pamphlets and briefs each week
for most of my adult life, I personally find the web much better.
This site is highly recommended. Check it out.
I don't think you will be disappointed.
www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/4114/index.html
This
was just an interesting site to peruse. It is a link to many,
many websites. Links cover subjects from "My name is Ann
and I'm a crossdresser." type of biography to items written
by wives and significant others, medical articles, people's journeys
down the road of transition, etc. It is a single location where
ou can link up with many other sites without continually typing
in a new URL and manually searching. Beware, some of the sites
have been closed down. Even so, there is enough here to keep you
busy for several hours.
I
have read a lot lately in various group newsletters and even on
some of the transgendered talk groups on the net that at various
times leadership becomes very frustrated with their group or net.
The crux of the complaints is that at various times the groups
seem to loose their momentum and spark and just fall by the wayside.
Various events are planned but no one shows or no one volunteers
to help. Speakers are invited but then very few members attend
the meeting, etc., etc.,
Much
of what is said is true but I personally feel that we the leadership
of transgendered groups sometimes ask, or at least expect, too
much from our membership. We need to look at our groups very realistically
and without blinders. The question we must first ask ourselves..."Is
our group/organization and the people in it capable of doing what
ever it is that they want to do?" "Of
course they are" you may say. Just look: "In
real life, Anne is a top executive of a local bank; Barbara owns
her own company; Carol is etc., etc.," and we go on
as to how successful our members are in their own right. But,
when you put these same folks in a skirt or dress, etc., they
seem to become immobilized. They do not function as certain members
of the group leadership expect. And why is that?
People come together in a transgender group
for many reasons. No two individuals have the same motivation
for joining the group. The only common thread is that each person
likes to wear the clothing of the opposite sex. Some because they
feel they are trapped in the wrong body and want to change sex.
Others because they feel much more comfortable reflecting their
feminine (or masculine) side. Yet others just like to wear the
clothes of the opposite sex. At first, the majority, all come
together because they have not had the opportunity to go out "en
fem" or to meet others. The group gives them the opportunity
to do both, in a safe environment. Regardless of their backgrounds,
it generally takes them one to two years to feel comfortable enough
to start doing things on their own and/or to make friends with
others. After this two year learning curve they generally spend
about one more year with the group and then cut the ties and move
on. By this time they now feel comfortable in their chosen gender
role and have made friends with similar folks that have much more
in common with their interests than the group at large.
In order for the group to be effective in providing
this learning experience, the group must have strong leadership
and must have a program that helps the individual both grow and
validate themselves. To do this, the leadership of any successful
group must be both compassionate and caring as well as assertive.
It cannot say to the group: "O.K. What does everyone want
to do?" and then try to satisfy everyone request. The leadership
must establish a program to include some instruction (beauty,
hair, clothes, etc.); some reflection (speakers with a counseling
background); some education (speakers on where the community has
been, is currently and where it seems to be going) and; entertainment
(fun).
Not everyone in the group is up to working in
a capacity to provide this type of a program. Either the threat
of disclosure is too great; they are not comfortable with their
chosen gender to undertake this type of activity or in
June 1999 Your Innvestment 5
My Opinion....Continued
some cases they
know the mechanics of how to do something but are not be familiar
enough with the subject to know how to make everything work. The
leadership must recognize this and be willing to put that extra
high heel forward to ensure the task is accomplished and even
more so, that it is accomplished in a worth while and positive
manner. To have the outcome be sloppy or not professional does
credit to no one. It then lowers the expectations of the group
and the standing of the group among other groups. This in turn
hurts any referrals that may come the groups way from other members
in the community.
It is not an easy task to ensure that a group
has a valid program. It is much different being a larger group
that has their own facility. When you have your own facility you
can have a clubhouse atmosphere while at the same time in another
area of the facility, you can conduct demonstrations, have speakers,
or whatever. For a group that utilizes a private home or a rented
hotel space, the program must be planned properly to ensure proper
execution. And as I alluded to above, you can please all of the
members some of the time; and some of the members all of the time
but you cannot please all of the members all of the time...so
please do not loose sleep over what some may consider, a program
that does not work as expected.
We do what we can to provide everyone who wants
it, a safe environment to do something they enjoy. We also provide
some extras that can hopefully assist all of the members at one
time or another. All in all a good organization provides needed
friendship among kindred spirits. In this day and age, that in
itself is a blessing and a half. You can't always get that elsewhere.
We should all stop our complaining and count our blessings.
New Year in September
September
starts our new season. Several things will take place at our September
meeting. First will be an annual report by Liz reviewing the past
year, highlighting what she feels have been accomplished. A financial
report will also be presented by Brenda. Any proposed changes
to the by-laws may also be brought up by the membership in addition
to any other subjects the membership would like to have discussed.
Election of new officers for the coming year
will also take place. A slate of officers will be put together
for proposal and motions from the floor will be entertained.
These two items should be taken very seriously
by the group as we will be entering the new millennium. The things
the group will do not only in the coming year but the way the
group will function in the future are at stake.
The September meeting is also the time for annual
dues to be paid. The fiscal year runs from September through the
end of August. This is why anyone new joining the group after
January has their dues pro-rated until the end of that year. At
this time we do not anticipate any changes to our dues structure.
We do not try, nor do we make, any money from our dues and fees
structure or from any of the parties that we host. At the beginning
of the new fiscal year, if we have $100 left over, that is some
sort of minor miracle. Any monies earned throughout the year goes
back into the organization. Depending upon the numbers in our
membership base is the key factor in determining if we will give
individual Christmas presents or not at our Christmas on Cape
Cod event in December. Other than that all monies goes into our
newsletter, stamps, facilities rentals and the picnic.
With September just over the horizon, please
keep in mind your membership renewal.
We cannot do it without you!
Ever notice
how much difference a neckline makes? The right one can create
a beautiful swanlike gracefulness -- the wrong one can make you
look like you've put on weight. Here are some guidelines:
Noelle Rose took a clothing
inventory over the weekend and this is what she posted on the
internet. (I never want to hear Tracy say agin that I have
three closets full of clothes and nothing to wear. I may equal
Noelle in some things but popular opinion not withstanding, except
for wigs, 10 plus 2 wiglets, each with their own stands, and a
few personal lingerie items, I do not exceed her. - Candy) If
anyone ever wants to go shopping, you now know who to call. (Yes!
Shop till you drop.)
10 shirt dresses 35 dresses/suits/skirt+top combinations 2 formal dresses 4 dressy jackets 22 skirts 13 blouses 4 leggings 4 slacks 4 tank tops 2 sweaters 4 shorts 9 tops 6 casual sandals 8 dressy sandals 3 boots 1 sneakers 5 slippers 1 maid outfit 4 lounging PJ's 7 robes 7 nightgowns 5 rain/winter coats 2 gloves 2 hats 5 scarves 15 panties |
36 tights/pantyhose 9 socks/stockings 1 garter belt 1 crinoline petticoat 1 full slip 1 pants slip 2 camisoles 2 misc. lingerie 8 bras 2 body shapers 1 corset 1 waist cincher 1 Diva 2 Veronicas 1 FOH hip padding 1 Jayne Belt gaff 5 wigs 1 wiglet In addition to this I have 4 wig forms 14 purses cosmetics jewelry etc., etc. Can this girl shop or what! J It's getting a little hard to hide the "stash" though. J Just kidding. J Hugs Noelle Rose |
J I think I'm
catching on to this program. If I don't do what it wants, it tells
me I completed an illegal operation and then shuts down. I just
love it. L
J GOOD NEWS. Dawn
came home from the hospital. Also Dawn and Terry got married.
They requested at 9 a.m. the hospital help them and they were
married with cake and all the fixings by 3 that afternoon. WE
WISH THEM HAPPINESS AND JOY FOREVER.
L We made a mistake in last months newsletter
with Julie's email address. The correct email address is stimpy1@capecod.net.
J During the May
meeting, Noelle Rose said she would pass on the URL where she
sent for and received her Covermark concealer. It is as follows:
http//www.
skinsite.con/info_covermark_cosmetics.htm.
J One of our girls told me the other day that
someone had called her a two-bit street walker. She then told
me she hit him over the head with her purse full of quarters.
J Under the headline: Throw that chest
out soldier!, the following item recently appeared in one
of the Boston newspapers: "The Danish Army purchased 500
brassieres - all the same size - for its female soldiers, after
being convinced by the manufacturer that the C-cup European size
100 fits 90 percent of Danish women. Nothing, it seems, could
be further from the truth. The women who measured either above
or below the so called average size in that department are said
to be furious. (Of course, wouldn't you!) L
J Testing lipstick
on the back of your hand may be a tried-and-true tradition, but
makeup artist Mary Greenwell says to smear it on your fingertips
instead. The texture and color of the skin on your fingers in
more akin to your lips.
J Wedding bells also rang for Sara and Beth
this month. The wedding took place outside in Rhode Island and
was well attended. WE WISH THEM BOTH BLISS AND JOY.
J Who says airline pilots do not have a sense
of humor. Overheard on the loud-speaker on a recent Southwest
Airline flight: "The weather at our destination is 50
degrees with some broken clouds, but they'll try to have them
fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves
you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines."
J The "Be
Nice To Yourself" tip for this month is Soak in the tub!
Four good reasons include: It beats stress and helps you sleep
better; It can rinse away headache pain; It drowns out colds,
flue and sinus trouble; and current research shows that it helps
do battle against cancer. It is recommended drawing a bath of
104 degrees (you can use a weather thermometer to gage it) and
stay in for 30 or 40 minutes. Use a cool cloth to wipe your face
if you need it. By adding bath oil or bubble bath and having some
scented candles burning can also make you feel very luxurious.
After all, we certainly deserve it!
J Life's battles
don't always go.
To the strongest woman.
But sooner or later, the woman who wins
Is the woman who thinks she can.
by Kim
Bonnell
The Daily
Dilemma
Q: I'm a bit of an athlete:
5'1", 130 pounds, with broad shoulders, narrow hips and muscular
all over. I'm in great physical shape but I always feel bulky,
stocky and never as feminine as my less muscular friends. (For
example, I don't wear sleeveless tops because my back, shoulders
and arms are so big.) How can I look and feel more feminine?
A: Let's think of ways to balance the breadth of your shoulders
by what you wear from the waist down, de-emphasizing your upper
body and giving you a look that's more classic and shapely.
While you should stay away from cuffed trousers because of your
height (they can make you look shorter) and away from extremely
wide or narrow pants, a classic un-cuffed, pleated trouser, worn
with a tucked-in top, so your waist/hipline shows, is a good choice
for you. Flat-front narrow pants, cut to fall dead straight from
your hips will work too.
In jackets, avoid shapeless, un-constructed styles; look for cuts
that have a defined (though not padded) shoulder (they'll make
your shoulder-line look less bulky, more crisp), and are nipped
at the waist, to add a bit of curve there.
You'll also look great in spring's new pleated skirts; they'll
look best on you grazing your knee or an inch above, no shorter
or you'll be into the cheerleader look. And I know this sounds
counterintuitive, but I recommend at least trying on boat neck,
cutaway and halter tops; they're visual foolers that can actually
make your shoulders look less broad.
Wear a bit of a shell, even with pants; an inch is all you need,
but it really will help.
Thanks for writing.
Kim
Thank you!
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