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Thursday, July 11, 1996
The Mr. Showbiz Plastic Surgery Lab

HO among us has not looked back through our failed relationships and said something like, "If only I could meet someone with Keith's good looks, Michael's personality, and Glenn's libido." Perhaps you have even dissected your platonic friends in the same manner. Well, what about the Friends? Who wouldn't want to take Ross's wit (mouth), Rachel's vivacity (hair), Monica's ambition (eyes), and Chandler's compassion (nose), and with them form the most special companion of all: a Superfriend. Mr. Showbiz is ten steps ahead of you, pal. With your psychic health in mind, we have opened up the Mr. Showbiz Plastic Surgery Lab. Go ahead! Create an Uberfriend.

Simply select the features you want from each of five cast members, click "Operate," and presto--new and improved Friends, so freshly conceived they're still pink. If you're wondering what's happened to Phoebe, we've taken her distinctive features out of our pool. Does this make our five Friends too similar? Well, as pedigree-dog owners have proven, inbreeding often yields the most unnatural results.





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