The Column Without a Name!
"A young column wakes up in the wilderness, blood caked on a shallow head wound -- and with no idea of who it is or where it's from. Only you, the faithful readers of Corona can help this column with its name, as it scours the countryside looking for the one-armed editor who robbed its life from it."
Shot of milk carton: "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS COLUMN?"
Their reward could be a half-ton of unsold Godzilla shirts, perfect for cleaning up around the kitchen and bathroom. Seriously folks, we are looking for a new name for this column. Please submit your suggestions to Deadpool directly. If we pick your title, you'll be rewarded. With what?!? Well... we're not quite sure yet...
Who the Heck is Deadpool?
Welcome to my weekly column. You are probably asking yourself, "Who the heck is Deadpool?" Well, I am a 19 year-old, French-Canadian, entertainment maniac. I have been a collaborator at CA for well over a year now. Usually, I draft pages for upcoming projects; however, I have recently acquired my own column. I will answer the basic questions from my readers as well as review movies and scripts. I'll also give you some news on videos, trailers, DVD's, music, maybe even books.
My Soapbox
I'll first start off with telling you what kind of Movies I enjoy and
which I hate. Take a look at my 1997 Top Ten List:
1-Good Will Hunting
2-As Good As it Gets 3-The Full Monty 4-Titanic 5-Jackie Brown |
6-Amistad
7-The Rainmaker 8-Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery 9-Liar, Liar 10-Face/Off |
Don't get me wrong I did like Titanic, but I just thought the writing was terrible. GWH was a great movie and had some great performances. Nicholson and Hunt were electrifying in ASAIG. The guys of TFM were both hilarious and dramatic.
Gotta say my favorite actor is Samuel L. Jackson. I wouldn't mind watching a six hour black and white film with no sound starring Sam. He is the definition of cool today. My favorite actress has been Claire Danes since 94's My So-Called Life. She is just amazing, talented and beautiful. I'm sure she's out there surfing the net. So Ms. Danes if you're out there, e-mail me sometime: it would be so cool to interview you.
I hate movies with really bad scripts (Godzilla, Snake Eyes, The Avengers). Hollywood needs to stop making big movies without a decent script. I'm also starting to dislike actors who can't play anything but themselves.
I'm also a big TV fan. My favorite show is NBC's ER. I've been following that show from the beginning and I've never missed an episode. It's a shame that Maria Bello has left, it won't be the same without her. Clooney is a dumbass for leaving after this season to pursue his film career. What film career??? Aside from Batman & Robin none of his movies have passed the $50 million mark at the box-office. You gotta be dumb to leave TV's #1 show for a lame-ass film career.
I adore Saturday Night Live, the current cast is hilarious. I expect Chris Kattan to be the next big star to come out of SNL. I've been watching SNL since '91. I grew up watching the Sandler, Myers, Carvey, Farley, Rock and Hartman doing sketches. One of the best cast the show ever had. I miss Norm MacDonald's weekend update, someone should slap NBC for removing him.
Now my column will officially begin by answering my first question.
"Hi DP, love what you do for CA. Anyway I was just wondering what is Tom Cruise doing next?" -Alexia
Well aside from changing Connor's diapers, making out with Nicole, and producing with Paula...not much. Obviously you must know that his next movie is the erotic thriller Eyes Wide Shut. The movie, directed by the insane Stanley Kubrick, took well over 2 years to shoot. While Nicole has done Practical Magic and is getting ready to star in a play abroad, our little Tommy has done nothing in front of the camera aside from a Rosie appearance and some EWS re-shoots. He's now getting ready to do Mission: Impossible 2 with action God John Woo at the helm. Shooting will begin next January in Australia.
Tom has also been flirting with Steinbeck's Point of View, a dramatic romance in development at Warner. Mark Johnson and Steven Reuther (Face/Off) are producing the picture. Point of View is about a cancer-stricken San Francisco man who returns to some lands that once belonged to his grandfather. The voyage turns into a spiritual rebirth, and the sick man finds new meaning in his life. Tom has also been quoted saying he would like to do a movie with his close friend Steven Spielberg next summer. No project has yet been chosen, but rumor has it that it could be a Charles Lindbergh biopic.
Good Morning Mr Reader,
Your mission should you choose to accept it. Is to review some trailers
and send those to DeadPool for a future Trailers of The Fall/Winter column.
Which trailers? Enemy of The State, Meet Joe Black, I Still Know What
You Did Last Summer, Psycho, Mighty Joe Young, Prince of Egypt, A Bug's
Life, Stepmom, The Siege and Star Trek: Insurrection.
That's it for it today.
That's All Folks...
Jean-François Allaire (aka Deadpool)
deadpool@colba.net
Contributing Content Writer
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