If you could start by understanding that this feeling of being all alone with your torment is understood by someone, this could give you the first and most important feeling that you need now - hope. Let's start by understanding your pain by comparing it to a life threatening situation that could easity be understood by anyone who does not seem to care about your problem now.
It was a beautiful summer day at the lake and I decided to take a swim to refresh myself and feel the exhilaration that a long swim would give me. I felt so good that I swam further than I had planned. Suddenly a severe pain hit me that felt like a knife in my side. I started to struggle against the water as it seemed to pull me down and panic gripped me as I realized that I had a severe muscle cramp. The water was no longer my friend, but an enemy that was going to take my life.
I cried out in total helplessness. I could not fight against this paralyzing pain - it was overwhelming me. So quickly was my life about to be taken from me that I screamed in utter horror, "Help!". No one seemed to hear my cries! I could see a great many people on the shore looking towards my direction as I thought to myself, "Why don't you help me?"
Finally, as I was thrashing around and screaming for help, a few people swam closer to me and yelled out, "Hey, what's wrong? Do you need some help?" I thought to myself, "Of course I need help! Can't you see that? Help me! I'm drowning!" At that time I could no longer scream out. I was totally helpless and knew I was going to die. Again I heard more people yelling, "Swim this way!" "Keep your head above the water." "Do you need a rope?" Advice and questions were not helping me. Why didn't they know how to help me? Couldn't they see I was drowning?
As my lungs filled with water and everything started to grow very dark, I felt something pull on my arm. Even though I was not aware of what was happening, I somehow sensed my body being pulled through the water. The next thing I remember was waking up coughing and vomiting violently, gasping for air that I could not feel. But then I realized that I was alive and had been pulled out of the water by someone who did know what was happening to me.
As I looked up at the crowd of people who seemed to have nothing better to do than to gawk at my near tragedy, there was a friendly face holding me up by the back of my head saying, "I'm so glad I saw what was happening to you. You had gone down and I almost lost you. It seemed like something led me right to you after you went down under the water. Are you all right? Is there anything I can do for you?" I remember that I started to laugh and cry at the same time thinking to myself, "This man just saved my life, and he is asking me if there is anything he can do for me. What more could anyone do for someone?"
I pulled my thoughts and composure together as I watched this person walk away after saying to me, "I'm so glad I was able to save you. Take care of yourself. Everything is going to be alright." It was too late before I realized I hadn't even asked him what his name was. No one else seemed to know him either. I never found out who this man was who saved my life and it's been over ten years now. The feeling of love and caring never left me and the gratitude stays with me overwhelming my heart.
Ever since that day all the problems that once plagued me and interfered with the pleasure of life seem so insignificant and unimportant. I am alive! If it wasn't for that day I never would have realized what I could have lost. Someone did understand my problem.
Would it help you to have someone see things as you see them? Would it take away some of the pain to know that someone does care enough to feel your pain with you? There is an old expression that says, "Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone." I don't believe this was meant as advice but the reality of the inhumanity of humanity. It is a fact that most people seem to be saying, "I can't think about your problems because I've got problems of my own." But the fact is that the most effective way of getting rid of your problems is to help someone else with theirs. However, you do have to have some hope that will lift you up to this realization first. So, let's establish some facts that will help you with your problem now.
There is cruelty in this world and there is also compassion. The cruelty is not the problem but it is the result of the problem. What is this great problem? The inability of people to care about themselves. Compassion may be thought of as the solution to the problem of cruelty but this is not so. Compassion is the result of the solution to the problem. What is this great solution? The recognition of the fact that there is something that touches the inner most part of our being when someone proves to us that they care for us as much as they do for themselves. When this happens something changes inside of us. We feel something we don't really understand. We feel the warmth and love of someone understanding and helping us, but unless it sinks deeper into our hearts, we remain the recipients of compassion only and not the beneficiaries."
To give compassion is to possess its true value. However, it is necessary to first be the recipient of compassion before you become the beneficiary of it. You are the recipient of my compassion even though I do not know you or exactly what your pain is.
The wonderful caring feeling I have for you as you read this comes from something greater than my human expression. Believe me, I feel your pain with you. I feel that I know you. I actually feel your thoughts, your fears, your doubts, your torment, your despair, your agony, and your hope. I am with you. You are not alone. There is part of life that connects us all together. We can't really understand it, we can only be aware of it. If you accept this compassion, a new feeling of wanting to give what you have received takes over and you become the beneficiary of compassion.
Once hope is realized in your consciousness, you can start to rebuild what was torn down. The rebuilding is done with a new awareness of adding what was missing in the beginning. As long as you have the inheritance of compassion, you will never again experience the devastating effects of being alone with a problem of any kind. You will have the awareness of that something which came into this world with you; that something that will live in your consciousness after your life on this earth passes on to a new plane of existance.
The time you have here in this world is important to everyone. There are many lives that need to be touched by your compassion. You are a very special person, filled with the awareness necessary to find your real purpose in this world. So go out and find the answers to all the questions your new consciousness is asking. There is always someone to help you along the way. Let this be a new beginning for you. One filled with great expectance of the most spectacular and exhilarating life that could only belong to one so deserving as you.
I am with you. God is with you.