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^RY:80-390
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^C{~IN Cartoon
^P+
^Cby Sean Golden}

Each month we add a touch of humor to Softdisk PC; we usually have comedy files, humorous articles and a cartoon.

The report card has a space reserved to allow users to offer their own cartoon caption replacements for the cartoon.  If you think you have a funnier caption than the  and one we've published, write it on the  and report card and send it back to us!  This month we are also publishing the best caption ideas people sent us for the cartoons which were first published on ODM #87, #88, and #89.

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To get the proper effect, replace the  and caption in each cartoon with whatever is suggested in red below:

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Cartoon from Issue 87
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I only date 486's.
 - Edwin C. Mallard, Arlington MA

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Hey, ya wanna swap floppies?
 - Richard Allen, Columbus, OH

Don't blame me for your virus!
 - Ken Vandver, Puyallup WA

And you really believe the Pentium is Satanic!
 - Roger M. Emerson, Nitro WV

Did you get a load of the  and multimedia slot on the  and new Pentium DX in accounting?
 - William A. Siebert, Gladwin MI

I understand, I understand, but that's still no reason to cut off your joystick!
 - Michael H. Davidian, Omaha NE

If you were I, I would be you.
 - Edward T. Sala Jr., Justice IL

Draw!
 - R.J. MacHennan, Des Plaines IL

Do you have a hard drive?
 - John Mateszory Jr., Dunkirk NY

I'm tired of being fed a bit at a time; let's take a byte!
 - L.H.Y. Ginnis, Hattiesburg, MI

Wouldn't the folks like to print out this cartoon?
 - Glenda Edwards, no city

Macs are soooo user-friendly (show millions of pull-down menus)
 - Jeff Woodhams, Pensacola FL

No thanks Eve, I think I'll have a banana.
 - Donna Dalton, Campbell MO

I still say minus one equals i!
 - Christina Alexander, Bronx NY

You gotta remind them who's boss, take 'em off-line once in a while.
 - Shawn Bratene, South Beach OR

Tell me again, "Why am I so lucky to be a computer?"
 - Scott Breslove, Fair Lawn NJ

Just 5 more minutes, honey!
 - Joyce A. Baranski, Cohoes NY

What do you mean you drive hard?
 - Barbie Kragness, Sweet Home OR
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So then the  and one modem says to the  and other...
 - Andy Ludwig, Gardiner MT

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Cartoon from Issue 88
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You bought how many new programs lately??
 - Kathy Low, Vancouver WA

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I feel down today.
 - Anonymous

Take two KB and call me in the  and morning.
 - Clinton OK

Looks like a self-inflicted viru-cide.
 - John J. Bednar, Ft. Benning GA

Beep beep, 'puter doesn't want a quacker.
 - Leonard Hampton

Don't just stand there, press my buttons!
 - Martha Wasterlain, Anderson SC

Who put in my memory?  I am missing a bit!
 - Edward T. Sala, Justice IL

I think I lost my chip.
 - Jeremiah J. Dillen, Philometh OR

Back to those bitty bytes.
 - L.a. McGinnis, Hattesburg MI

Slave of the  and 90s.
 - Marty St. George, Pennyan NY

A computer using the user.
 - John A. Richard, Worcester MA

License plate: GO.EXE
 - Larry Corner, Ballwin MO

Bubbah's trip to space.
 - Jason Piatt, Mad. Hgts VA

Well of course this keyboard costs more!  It has a beverage holder!
 - Jeff Woodhams, Pensacola FL

Is there a doctor in the  and house?  I may have a virus!
 - Mary Terriah & Clifford A. Labre, Cornwall Ontario

Smile?  With the day I've had, get serious.
 - Gloria O'Steen, College Grove TN

Identity Crisis.
 - Jean Van Dyke, Plymouth MI

Where oh where has my little file gone?
 - Shriley Herring, Metropolis IL

I bet they wish they could print me out!!
 - Glenda F. Edwards, no city given.

My older computer I think?
 - Rod Barnes, no city

What memory?
 - Ivan M. Eye, Machesney Park IL

Why do I keep giving this machine a nervous breakdown?
 - John Hobbs, Salem NH

Dah - What's up, Doc?
 - David Kansteiner, Washington MO

I'm out of my Motherboard.
 - Kenneth Arcieri, Rockville MD

My computer does this since I called the White House and talked with Hillary via modem.
 - Donald Bilicki, Marietta GA

I'm not talking without better speakers.
 - Roger S. MacLennan, Des Plaines IL

It's not the mailman's fault ODM is late!
 - Joyce A. Baranski, Cohoes NY

88 Megs Makes me dizzy!
 - Charles E. Leavenworth, Cottonwood AZ 
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Ram-nesia.
 - Linda Zember, Swansea SC

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Cartoon from Issue 89
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Quick! Call Peter Norton!
 - Paul J. Crozier Smith, Victoria BC

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A dust cover works better with the  and machine off!
 - James A. Davis, Nixa MO

I need an egg-spert.
 - C. Scott Johnson, Georgetown DE

Got any superglue?
 - Richard S. Williams, Henderson NY

What, no batteries?
 - Rod Barnes, Coupeville WA

I'm human, I'm suppose to make mistakes.  What's your excuse?
 - James E. Push - Wytheville, VA

I've fallen and I can't get up.
 - Mr. K. King, Galveston TX
 - Also submitted by Sid Cohen, Brooklyn NY

You did it, not I. Delete.
 - Edward T. Sala Jr., No address given

I fell out of Windows 3.1.
 - Wayne Tayler, Groves TX

Difference between a beginner and an expert
 - Bob Jensen, Colorado Springs CO
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