Fun with Superheros

Remember the black and white Superman series starring George Reeves? In the series, the bad guys try to take out Superman with their small caliber pistols. Being the Man of Steel, Superman laughs at the futility of their attempt as bullets bounce off his chest. Inevitably the bad guys run out of bullets. In their last desparate effort, the bad guys throw their unloaded guns at Superman. With the gallantry of a superhero, Superman ducks.


Fun with Talk Show Hosts

I love watching Ricki Lake. Her show always cheers me up no matter how down I feel. I don't give a damn about the makeovers, and I can care less about the trashy dressing friend. It brings a smile to my face to be reminded of the world we live in.

The following is an excerpt of my roommate's dog on the Ricky Lake Show. The dog is named Bio-Sci.

Ricki: Tell us a little about yourself.

Bio-Sci: Ruff!

Ricki: Let's get some questions from the audience.

Daniel: Why don't you get a real job? You lazy ass dog.

Bio-Sci: Ruff! Ir LIVE IrN A DOrG HOUSE.

Ricki: Miss, what comment do you have for Bio-Sci?

Shataqua: You're not even all that. You gotta lose some weight.

Bio-Sci: Ruff! Ruff! Ir LIKE FRISBEES. Arg.

Shataqua: I'm not hearing that. Talk to the hand 'cause the face just doesn't understand.

Ricki: Sir? Do you have a question?

Ed: Why don't you get an education?

Bio-Sci: Arg. Ir'M A DOrG.

Daniel: Get a job.

Bio-Sci: MY EAR IrTCHES.


Fun with Chat Rooms

For newbies, the Internet jargon can be enigmatic. I've taken the liberty of extracting a script from a recent chat room conversation. Here we can decipher the message and delve deeper into the psyche of the Internet junkie.
Script Translation
PinoyQt: Any ladies in the house? Asian male performing his mating call. Qt (Cutie) denotes virility.
SensitiveGuy: Hi! (((((ChunLi))))) Another male competes for female attention. He hugs ChunLi by using the brackets.
ChunLi: Hiyee! (((((SG))))) ChunLi, the only female in the chat room, returns the hug.
PinoyQt: @}-,-'-- for ChunLi The competition heats up. PinoyQt tries to entice the female with a rose.
ChunLi: Thank you so much. It's so cute! =) The female seems to be too enthusiastic. ChunLi could be a male in disguise.
SensitiveGuy: I just picked my nose. <g> SensitiveGuy fights back, <g> denotes a grin. It is usually placed after a comment to make it funny.
ChunLi: LOL! ChunLi is laughing out loud. LOL is the appropriate response to <g> since any comment followed by <g> is so funny.
PinoyQt: I drive a 97 Acura Integra GSR V-tech with alloy rims and 80 watts per channel sound system.

 		SensitiveGuy is in trouble. PinoyQt is flexing his feathers.
PinoyQt Timeout. In a desparate effort, SensitiveGuy uses pirated software to kick PinoyQt out of the chat room.