The Shakespearian Dating Service

Now thou can woo thy man or thy woman of thy affection with great ease. Just don't expect him or him to pay for thou dinner.

The first name of your one true lover
Your first name
Is your one true love a "man" or a "lady?"
Is your one true love a "he" or a "she"?
Something that gives off light
A very famous movie
Something or someone famous for appearing in that movie
The villain in that movie
A really nasty disease
"Man, I can't believe a cafeteria worker who is that is allowed to model underwear."
Job where ugly people work
A piece of clothing people usually don't talk about on "Sesame Street"
Noun that describes how many brain cells are currently floating around Jerry Springer's skull
"Excuse me, my eye just popped out again. Would you mind it for me, please?"
Another word for "yell"
Your favorite drink
"Don't be too , or your date will think you're an illegal alien from Botswana."
Something big that holds a lot of stuff
Anything in a grocery store that you would buys tons of if you could afford and had a hole in your neck
Part of your body where you would use that self-indulgent thing from the grocery store
Place you would buy if you sold all that junk you bought from the grocery store
"I wish would stop singing out loud. I can't believe someone gave her a recording contract."
The most positive uplifting thing you can think of
The most negative, dark and sinister thing you can think of