MISCELLANEOUS LAWS AND THINGS THAT ARE TRUE:



                       FINAGLE'S LAWS:

 1.  No matter what result is anticipated, there is always someone willing to
     fake it.

 2.  No matter what the result, there is always someone eager to misinterpret
     it.

 3.  No matter what happens, there is always someone who believes it happened
     according to his pet theory.


                       FINAGLE'S CREED

            Science is Truth;  don't be misled by facts.


                       THE FINAGLE FACTOR
   (Sometimes called the SWAG(Scientific Wild-Assed Guess) Constant)

     That quantity which, when multiplied by, divided by, added to, or
     subtracted from the answer which you got, yields the answer you
     should have gotten.

     [note]   Items such as 'Finagle's Constant' and the more subtle 'Bougerre
              Factor' are loosely grouped, in mathematics, under constant
              variables, or, if you prefer, variable constants.

     Finagle's Constant, a multiplier of the zero-order term, may be
     characterized as changing the universe to fit the equation.

     The Bougerre (pronounced 'bugger') Factor is characterized as changing the
     equation to fit the universe.  It is also known as the 'Soothing Factor';
     mathematically similar to the damping factor, it has the characteristic
     of dropping the subject under discussion to zero importance.

     A combination of the two, the Diddle Coefficient, is characterized as
     changing things so that universe and equation appear to fit without
     requiring a change in either.


                       FINAGLE'S COROLLARY

     On a seasonally adjusted basis, there are only six months in a year.



                IGGY'S RULE OF SCIENTIFIC ADVANCES

     All scientific discoveries are first recorded on napkins or tablecloths.
     Engineering advances are drawn inside matchbook covers.  Keep supplies
     of them handy at all times.


                  THE FOUR LAWS OF THERMODYNAMICS

 1.   You can't win.

 2.   You can't break even.

 3.   You can't get out of the game.

 4.   THE LAW OF ENTROPY:
  The perversity of the universe tends towards a maximum.