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Episode #24: "Gravity Hill"  The following morning: Bubba had picked up his cousin Earl and Erich at their hotel in Paris, driven them to Gravity Hill, and was about to give them the VIP tour. "Prepare to have your senses literally bombarded with solid, in-yer-face evidence that gravity, that force of nature we all know and love and depend on almost daily for our personal well-bein', ain't all it's cracked up to be!" announced Bubba proudly. That cliche seemed to fit Gravity Hill quite well, Erich thought to himself. It was only a carelessly built wooden shack no larger than a one-car garage. It was overgrown with weeds and had only a small, unpaved gravel covered area in which to park; not that it mattered, since Bubba's Yugo was the only car there. Bubba explained that the lack of customers was due to local officials denying him permission to place the all-important billboards along the highways to, as Bubba put it, 'suck in the tourists'.Inside, Erich found that the floor of the shack had been slanted at a very steep angle. The wooden panels of the shack were parallel to the slanted floor, so if a person were to take a photo of someone standing in the room, and tilt the camera so the bottom of it were parallel to the floor, the person in the photograph would appear to be standing at an angle. Scientific marvel? Gravity Hill was nothing but a cheap trick ... an optical illusion, thought Erich as Bubba performed a few pathetically foolish tricks with a ball and a pitcher of water. In a couple of minutes, the 'VIP Tour' was over, and Erich had to pay Bubba the equivalent of $10.95 U.S. in francs. Earl, on the other hand, loved every minute of it and complimented Bubba on his brilliant presentation, and begged Bubba to show him how to perform the tricks. Erich spent the next hour stuck in a Twilight Zone-like nightmare, pleading with Earl and Bubba to please drive him back to the hotel while Bubba taught Earl how to pour water and roll a ball. Erich found his nightmare was only beginning, however; after all his waiting and whining, they were ready to leave when Bubba's car refused to start. With no telephone service in the area, and not knowing the way back to begin walking, Erich was now forced to sit by helplessly while Bubba tinkered with the car and Earl played country and western songs using only his left hand and his right armpit. Erich sat on the steps in front of Gravity Hill, his head in his hands, quietly sobbing. Meanwhile, Francesca, Cathie and Antonio were enjoying a delicious brunch on the patio at a charming little cafe with their personal tour guide, Jerome. As the day went on, Cathie found that the cafe wasn't all that was charming. Jerome led them through Paris as if he owned the city, and judging from the way people greeted him everywhere they went, one couldn't be blamed for thinking he did. Cathie had seen many attractive and enchanting young men pass through Francesca's world in the time that she had known her, but in Jerome's engaging presence, it made Cathie smile to herself to realize she was unable to recall what they looked like. Even Antonio was following Jerome around like an adoring kid brother. It was only at the end of the day, after Jerome had dropped them off at the hotel, as Cathie luxuriated in a warm bubble bath thinking about the wonderful day they had just spent, that she began to feel uneasy. Why? 'Why do I feel a little ... uneasy?' Cathie thought to herself. After a couple of minutes, she could see it plainly. Francesca was not just charmed by Jerome. She had fallen in love with him that very afternoon. Just before he dropped them off at the hotel, hadn't he asked Francesca out for a drink before bed? And had she not accepted? How could Cathie had been so blind? Erich was in deep trouble, thought Cathie as she got out of the tub and toweled herself dry. Sure, Erich was smart and cute and nice and sweet, but next to Jerome, he was dog meat. And if Cathie didn't do something, Francesca and Erich's marriage would soon be Alpo.Don't miss the next exciting episode! |
